Crap Kingdom
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Narrated by:
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D. C. Pierson
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By:
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D. C. Pierson
About this listen
The Chosen One must be retrieved from Earth.
He will bring down the wall and restore the kingdom to glory.
His name is Tom Parking.
With this mysterious yet oddly ordinary-looking prophecy, Tom’s fate is sealed: he’s been plucked from his life and whisked away to a magical kingdom to be its Chosen One.
There’s just one problem - the kingdom is mostly made of garbage from Earth. Okay, well, two problems, the second being that the king hates Tom. Also, the princess likes to wear fake mustaches. And being Chosen One seems to consist mainly of cleaning out rats’ noses at the Royal Rat-Snottery.
So, basically, the kingdom sucks.
When Tom turns down the job of Chosen One, he thinks he’s making a smart decision. But when Tom discovers he’s been replaced by his best friend Kyle, who’s always been cooler, more athletic, and better with girls, Tom wants Crap Kingdom back - at any cost. And the hilarity that ensues will determine the fate of the universe.
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When Nadia's family moves to Captive's Sound, she instantly realizes there's more to the place than meets the eye. Descended from witches, Nadia can sense that a spell has been cast over the tiny Rhode Island town - a sickness infecting everyone and everything in it. The magic at work is darker and more powerful than anything she's come across and has sunk its claws most deeply into Mateo...her rescuer, her friend, and the guy she yearns to get closer to even as he pushes her away.
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Compelling, fun and exciting!
- By M. Herbert on 07-15-13
By: Claudia Gray
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Every Soul a Star
- By: Wendy Mass
- Narrated by: Jessica Almasy, Ali Ahn, Mark Turetsky
- Length: 8 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Unlike the thousands converging at Moon Shadow to witness a total solar eclipse, Ally calls the isolated campground home. Bree shields herself in a cloak of good looks and popularity, but there is something within her no one suspects. And Jack, overweight and socially inept, finds himself on the verge of a startling possibility.
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Yes I have listened to this book 3 times
- By Excelsior on 06-24-18
By: Wendy Mass
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An Abundance of Katherines
- By: John Green
- Narrated by: Jeff Woodman
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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When it comes to relationships, Colin Singleton’s type is girls named Katherine. And when it comes to girls named Katherine, Colin is always getting dumped. Nineteen times, to be exact. On a road trip miles from home, this anagram-happy, washed-up child prodigy has $10,000 in his pocket, a bloodthirsty feral hog on his trail, and an overweight, Judge Judy-loving best friend riding shotgun - but no Katherines.
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struggled to finish listening
- By Daniel on 03-11-20
By: John Green
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Turtles All the Way Down
- By: John Green
- Narrated by: Kate Rudd
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Aza Holmes never intended to pursue the disappearance of fugitive billionaire Russell Pickett, but there’s a hundred-thousand-dollar reward at stake and her Best and Most Fearless Friend, Daisy, is eager to investigate. So together, they navigate the short distance and broad divides that separate them from Pickett’s son Davis. Aza is trying. She is trying to be a good daughter, a good friend, a good student, and maybe even a good detective, while also living within the ever-tightening spiral of her own thoughts.
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I hate to call it a trigger warning, but-
- By Lynnzee on 10-23-17
By: John Green
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Unearthly
- By: Cynthia Hand
- Narrated by: Samantha Quan
- Length: 10 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Clara Gardner has recently learned that she's part angel. Having angel blood run through her veins not only makes her smarter, stronger, and faster than humans (a word, she realizes, that no longer applies to her), but it means she has a purpose, something she was put on this earth to do. Figuring out what that is, though, isn't easy.
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Fantastic story, horrible narrator.
- By BookMama on 08-26-11
By: Cynthia Hand
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Full Tilt
- By: Neal Shusterman
- Narrated by: Josh Bloomberg
- Length: 5 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Sixteen-year-old Blake has always been the responsible one in his dysfunctional family. Quinn is his brother's opposite - a thrill-seeker who's always chasing the next scary rush. Quinn and Blake are in for the surprise of their lives when they're thrust into the world of a bizarre phantom carnival - and their souls are the price of admission. In order to save his brother, and himself, Blake must survive seven different carnival rides before dawn. Seven rides sounds easy. But each ride is full of unexpected dangers, because each ride is a reflection of one of Blake's deepest fears.
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Trials and Rides
- By Jonas Lee on 01-07-19
By: Neal Shusterman
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Between the Lines
- By: Jodi Picoult, Samantha Van Leer
- Narrated by: Robert Ian MacKenzie, Suzy Jackson, Nick Cordero
- Length: 8 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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A story of romance, adventure, and humor, Between the Lines features high-schooler and social outsider Delilah, who discovers a charming fairy tale in the school library and can’t resist turning to it again and again. But one day she finds the book has hidden depths—and that the story’s handsome prince has somehow stepped from the page into her very own world.
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Not YA, this is a children's story
- By Johnna Joy on 07-04-12
By: Jodi Picoult, and others
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Unfiction
- By: Gene Doucette
- Narrated by: Brad Wills
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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When Oliver Naughton joins the Tenth Avenue Writers Underground, headed by literary wunderkind Wilson Knight, Oliver figures he'll finally get some of his wild imaginings out of his head and onto paper. But when Wilson takes an intense interest in Oliver's writing and his genre stories of dragons, aliens, and spies, things get weird. Oliver's stories don't just need to be finished: they insist on it.
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Perfectly Captured Tone and Well Matched Wit
- By Ian on 08-04-17
By: Gene Doucette
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Loving Day
- By: Mat Johnson
- Narrated by: J. D. Jackson
- Length: 12 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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On his first night in his new home, Warren spies two figures in the grass outside; when he screws up the nerve to confront them, they disappear. The next day he encounters ghosts of a different kind: In the face of the teenage girl he meets at a comics convention, he sees the mingled features of his white father and his black mother, both now dead. The girl is his daughter, and she thinks she's white.
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Teen lit with heavy erotic imagery
- By Itinerant T on 08-26-15
By: Mat Johnson
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A Girl Named Digit
- By: Annabel Monaghan
- Narrated by: Julia Farhat
- Length: 5 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Farrah "Digit" Higgins may be going to MIT in the fall, but this L.A. high school genius has left her geek self behind in another school district so she can blend in with the popular crowd at Santa Monica High and actually enjoy her senior year. But when Farrah, the daughter of a UCLA math professor, unknowingly cracks a terrorist group's number sequence, her laid-back senior year gets a lot more interesting. Soon she is personally investigating the case, on the run from terrorists, and faking her own kidnapping - all while trying to convince a young, hot FBI agent to take her seriously.
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Nails It
- By Lifeisshort on 05-16-14
By: Annabel Monaghan
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Mirrored
- By: Alex Flinn
- Narrated by: Amanda Dolan, Caitlin Davies, James Fouhey, and others
- Length: 11 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Celine's life is the stuff fairy tales are made of. She's beautiful, talented, and brave. Unfortunately, her tale comes complete with a wicked stepmother! When Violet steps into Celine's life, everything changes, and weird things begin to happen to her - bizarre accidents, strange illnesses, and rabid animal attacks. Celine doesn't feel safe anywhere. It's almost as if some hateful witch is out to get her.
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It was pretty good, just not a book that I would listen to over and over again
- By Pablo Valdez on 04-27-17
By: Alex Flinn
What listeners say about Crap Kingdom
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Robert J
- 01-07-15
Its not Crap
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
its funny, imaginative, and most of my friends are thespians so this is up their alley.
What did you like best about this story?
It was about an actor who was lazy in school and the parents threatened to take that privilege away from him very similar to my senior year.
Which scene was your favorite?
The scene where the village idiot was impersonating the father.
Any additional comments?
Read this book.
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