Happy Endings
The Tales of a Meaty-Breasted Zilch
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
Buy for $14.24
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Jim Norton
-
By:
-
Jim Norton
About this listen
Jim will discuss everything from his affinity for hookers to stalking Black Sabbath and Alan Alda to always getting stuck with the hot girl's fat friend. He will share some of his experiences with Opie and Anthony, including his arrest on the infamous Voyeur Bus (a bus filled with naked girls that drove around Manhattan flashing passers-by). Many more heartwarming stories will be included in what is sure to be the most controversial title of 2007.
In addition to being a regular on the Opie & Anthony Show, Norton sells out comedy shows across the country. He starred on the recent HBO series Lucky Louie and was a regular on Comedy Central's Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn. He has appeared on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, The Late Show with David Letterman, and other national shows.
Norton had this to say about his forthcoming title: "It's ironic that many of the stories revolve around prostitution, because that's where all proceeds from this...will be going. Actually, that's probably more disgusting and creepy than ironic."
Explicit Language Warning: You must be 18 years or older to purchase.
©2007 Jim Norton. All rights reserved (P)2007 Simon and Schuster Inc. All rights reserved.Listeners also enjoyed...
-
Everybody Is Awful
- Except You!
- By: Jim Norton - Foreword, Jim Florentine
- Narrated by: Jim Norton - Foreword, Jim Florentine
- Length: 7 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Twitter Trolls. Facebook Freaks. Instagram Exhibitionists. These are just a few of the creatures our technology-obsessed culture has spawned in its quest to simplify our lives. The madness is so universal now that everyone has dealt with it. You login to Facebook, read a stupid post, and immediately want to tell your "friend" to go have relations with himself. Thankfully, popular comedian and television host Jim Florentine has a solution for those of us on the verge of bashing our iPhones to bits.
-
-
This book should be called “the newer testament”
- By Katharine Mae Peck on 02-28-18
By: Jim Norton - Foreword, and others
-
Permanently Suspended: The Rise and Fall... and Rise Again of Radio's Most Notorious Shock Jock
- By: Anthony Cumia, Johnny Russo - contributor, Brad Trackman - contributor, and others
- Narrated by: Anthony Cumia
- Length: 6 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Today, Anthony Cumia is the co-host of the wildly popular “Anthony Cumia Show,” which live-streams to a huge following of paid subscribers; however, Anthony is most well-known from the legendary, nationally syndicated “Opie and Anthony Show.” Permanently Suspended is an all-access pass to the controversial mayhem that ensued on-and-off the air. A must-listen for all diehard O&A fans, Permanently Suspended finally answers the questions that everyone has been waiting for.
-
-
Nothing new here
- By Richard Chciuk on 12-27-18
By: Anthony Cumia, and others
-
Too Fat to Fish
- By: Artie Lange
- Narrated by: Artie Lange
- Length: 7 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
A natural storyteller with a bottomless pit of material, Lange grew up in a close-knit, working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, as a maniacal Yankees fan who pursued the two things his father said he was cut out for: sports and comedy. Wild, shocking, and drop-dead hilarious, Too Fat to Fish is Artie Lange giving everything he's got to give. And like a true pro, the man never disappoints.
-
-
great book, horrid readers
- By John on 03-18-09
By: Artie Lange
-
I'd Like to Play Alone, Please
- Essays
- By: Tom Segura
- Narrated by: Tom Segura
- Length: 6 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Tom Segura is known for his twisted takes and irreverent comedic voice. But after a few years of crazy tours and churning out podcasts weekly, all while parenting two young children, he desperately needs a second to himself. It’s not that he hates his friends and family — he’s not a monster — he’s just beat, which is why his son’s (ruthless) first full sentence, “I’d like to play alone, please,” has since become his mantra.
-
-
Hot sauce is the best!
- By Michael Bowen on 06-15-22
By: Tom Segura
-
Life of the Party
- Stories of a Perpetual Man-Child
- By: Bert Kreischer
- Narrated by: Bert Kreischer
- Length: 5 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Bert Kreischer doesn't know how to say "no." If he did, he wouldn't have gotten himself mixed up with a group of Russian mobsters on a class trip to Moscow, earning him his nickname: "The Machine." He wouldn't have wrestled with a bear or swum with sharks on national television. He wouldn't have (possibly) smoked PCP with a star of Saturday Night Live. And he wouldn't have been named the Number One Partier in the Nation by Rolling Stone, inspired the movie National Lampoon's Van Wilder, or performed standup to sellout crowds across the country.
-
-
Fart Chrysler
- By Ryan Bonifay on 05-23-17
By: Bert Kreischer
-
Tremendous
- The Life of a Comedy Savage
- By: Joey "Coco" Diaz
- Narrated by: Joey "Coco" Diaz
- Length: 6 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Outsider. Misfit. Criminal. Convict. . . . Movie star. Family man. Comedy legend. Joey Diaz has been called every name in the book (and then some). Now, for the first time, he shares the story of his unlikely rise to fame in his own words—with no punches pulled.
-
-
Thank you
- By amanda on 05-04-23
By: Joey "Coco" Diaz
-
Everybody Is Awful
- Except You!
- By: Jim Norton - Foreword, Jim Florentine
- Narrated by: Jim Norton - Foreword, Jim Florentine
- Length: 7 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Twitter Trolls. Facebook Freaks. Instagram Exhibitionists. These are just a few of the creatures our technology-obsessed culture has spawned in its quest to simplify our lives. The madness is so universal now that everyone has dealt with it. You login to Facebook, read a stupid post, and immediately want to tell your "friend" to go have relations with himself. Thankfully, popular comedian and television host Jim Florentine has a solution for those of us on the verge of bashing our iPhones to bits.
-
-
This book should be called “the newer testament”
- By Katharine Mae Peck on 02-28-18
By: Jim Norton - Foreword, and others
-
Permanently Suspended: The Rise and Fall... and Rise Again of Radio's Most Notorious Shock Jock
- By: Anthony Cumia, Johnny Russo - contributor, Brad Trackman - contributor, and others
- Narrated by: Anthony Cumia
- Length: 6 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Today, Anthony Cumia is the co-host of the wildly popular “Anthony Cumia Show,” which live-streams to a huge following of paid subscribers; however, Anthony is most well-known from the legendary, nationally syndicated “Opie and Anthony Show.” Permanently Suspended is an all-access pass to the controversial mayhem that ensued on-and-off the air. A must-listen for all diehard O&A fans, Permanently Suspended finally answers the questions that everyone has been waiting for.
-
-
Nothing new here
- By Richard Chciuk on 12-27-18
By: Anthony Cumia, and others
-
Too Fat to Fish
- By: Artie Lange
- Narrated by: Artie Lange
- Length: 7 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
A natural storyteller with a bottomless pit of material, Lange grew up in a close-knit, working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, as a maniacal Yankees fan who pursued the two things his father said he was cut out for: sports and comedy. Wild, shocking, and drop-dead hilarious, Too Fat to Fish is Artie Lange giving everything he's got to give. And like a true pro, the man never disappoints.
-
-
great book, horrid readers
- By John on 03-18-09
By: Artie Lange
-
I'd Like to Play Alone, Please
- Essays
- By: Tom Segura
- Narrated by: Tom Segura
- Length: 6 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Tom Segura is known for his twisted takes and irreverent comedic voice. But after a few years of crazy tours and churning out podcasts weekly, all while parenting two young children, he desperately needs a second to himself. It’s not that he hates his friends and family — he’s not a monster — he’s just beat, which is why his son’s (ruthless) first full sentence, “I’d like to play alone, please,” has since become his mantra.
-
-
Hot sauce is the best!
- By Michael Bowen on 06-15-22
By: Tom Segura
-
Life of the Party
- Stories of a Perpetual Man-Child
- By: Bert Kreischer
- Narrated by: Bert Kreischer
- Length: 5 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Bert Kreischer doesn't know how to say "no." If he did, he wouldn't have gotten himself mixed up with a group of Russian mobsters on a class trip to Moscow, earning him his nickname: "The Machine." He wouldn't have wrestled with a bear or swum with sharks on national television. He wouldn't have (possibly) smoked PCP with a star of Saturday Night Live. And he wouldn't have been named the Number One Partier in the Nation by Rolling Stone, inspired the movie National Lampoon's Van Wilder, or performed standup to sellout crowds across the country.
-
-
Fart Chrysler
- By Ryan Bonifay on 05-23-17
By: Bert Kreischer
-
Tremendous
- The Life of a Comedy Savage
- By: Joey "Coco" Diaz
- Narrated by: Joey "Coco" Diaz
- Length: 6 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Outsider. Misfit. Criminal. Convict. . . . Movie star. Family man. Comedy legend. Joey Diaz has been called every name in the book (and then some). Now, for the first time, he shares the story of his unlikely rise to fame in his own words—with no punches pulled.
-
-
Thank you
- By amanda on 05-04-23
By: Joey "Coco" Diaz
-
Based on a True Story
- A Memoir
- By: Norm Macdonald
- Narrated by: Norm Macdonald, Tim O'Halloran
- Length: 7 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When Norm Macdonald, one of the greatest stand-up comics of all time, was approached to write a celebrity memoir, he flatly refused, calling the genre “one step below instruction manuals.” Norm then promptly took a two-year hiatus from stand-up comedy to live on a farm in northern Canada. When he emerged he had under his arm a manuscript, a genre-smashing book about comedy, tragedy, love, loss, war, and redemption. When asked if this was the celebrity memoir, Norm replied, “Call it anything you damn like.”
-
-
Bizarre, funny ride
- By Michael Chauvin on 09-25-16
By: Norm Macdonald
-
Overstated
- A Coast-to-Coast Roast of the 50 States
- By: Colin Quinn
- Narrated by: Colin Quinn
- Length: 4 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The United States is in a 50-states-wide couples’ counseling session, thinking about filing for divorce. But is that really what we want? Can a nation composed of states that are so different possibly hang together? Colin Quinn, comedian, social commentator, and writer and star of Red State Blue State and Unconstitutional, calls us out state-by-state, from Connecticut to Hawaii. He identifies the hypocrisies inherent in what we claim to believe and what we actually do.
-
-
Some authors shouldn't read their own book
- By D. Goss on 04-01-21
By: Colin Quinn
-
The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo
- By: Amy Schumer
- Narrated by: Amy Schumer
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo, Amy mines her past for stories about her teenage years, her family, relationships, and sex and shares the experiences that have shaped who she is - a woman with the courage to bare her soul to stand up for what she believes in, all while making us laugh. Down to earth and relatable, frank and unapologetic, Amy Schumer is one of us: She relies on her sister for advice, still hangs out with her high school pals, and continues to navigate the ever-changing boundaries in love, work, and life.
-
-
mind numbing
- By katrina on 09-17-16
By: Amy Schumer
-
This Is Not Fame
- A "From What I Re-Memoir"
- By: Doug Stanhope
- Narrated by: Doug Stanhope, Chad Shank, full cast
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Doug Stanhope has been drunkenly stumbling down the back roads and dark alleys of stand-up comedy for over a quarter of a century, roads laden with dank bars, prostitutes, cheap drugs, farm animals, evil dwarfs, public nudity, menacing third-world police, psychotic breaks, sex offenders, and some understandable suicides. You know, just for levity. While other comedians were seeking fame, Stanhope was seeking immediate gratification, dark spectacle, or sometimes just his pants.
-
-
The extras are whats worth it.
- By Patrick H. on 05-18-18
By: Doug Stanhope
-
No Encore for the Donkey
- By: Doug Stanhope
- Narrated by: Doug Stanhope
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Misanthrope. Iconoclast. Apostate. Drunk. Many words have been used to describe Doug Stanhope, but rarely has “hopeful” been one of them. However, heading into 2016, Stanhope peered through the apocalyptic fog and saw a forecast that was more rainbows than acid rain: His first book was set for release, his new stand-up special was in the can, and he was about to film a television pilot with his friend and confidant Johnny Depp. The only thing that could stop Doug was himself, and that’s exactly what he did.
-
-
Wow.
- By Jennifer Carr on 08-20-20
By: Doug Stanhope
-
Almost Interesting
- The Memoir
- By: David Spade
- Narrated by: David Spade
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
David Spade is best known for his harsh "Hollywood Minute" sketches on SNL, his starring roles in movies like Tommy Boy and Joe Dirt, and his seven-year stint as Dennis Finch on the series Just Shoot Me. Now, with a wit as dry as the weather in his home state of Arizona, the "comic brat extraordinaire" delivers a memoir.
-
-
Everything You Could Want in an Autobiography
- By Zoegirl777 on 10-30-15
By: David Spade
-
Crash and Burn
- By: Artie Lange, Anthony Bozza
- Narrated by: Sean Runnette
- Length: 10 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
At a high point in his career, Artie Lange performed a sold-out show in Carnegie Hall-and he did it with a pocketful of heroin. In the midst of a deep, self-destructive depression, addicted to heroin, cocaine, and prescription drugs, he lashed out at everyone around him-from his cohosts on The Howard Stern Show to celebrity guests and even his longtime friends. Then came his legendary meltdown on-air, with 6 million people listening, after which Lange pulled himself together enough to go to a buddy's bachelor party in Amsterdam.
-
-
[Narrator Fail] Comic Genius+Depression+Drugs=Mess
- By Hilary on 11-07-13
By: Artie Lange, and others
-
The Death of Cool
- From Teenage Rebellion to the Hangover of Adulthood
- By: Gavin McInnes
- Narrated by: Gavin McInnes
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
This is his story, or, rather, stories - lots of them, and all gut-punchingly hilarious, from that first far reach into a girl's tight jeans to turning forty with a cataclysmic party. In between you’ll hear about acid trips, threesomes, Nazi skinheads, his band Anal Chinook (Inuit for “warm wind”), Martians in northern Canada, throwing pedophiles in jail, dinner with the Clash, what happens when you crash Bill Maher's show wasted, and the true story of Vice magazine.
-
-
if you don't buy this book, the terrorists win
- By Kelsey Gholi on 04-03-17
By: Gavin McInnes
-
Wanna Bet?
- A Degenerate Gambler's Guide to Living on the Edge
- By: Artie Lange
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The two-time best-selling author, comedian, actor, and radio icon explains the philosophy that has kept his existence boredom-free since the age of 13 - the love of risk. An avid sports better and frequent card player, Lange believes that the true gambler gets high not from winning, but from the chaotic unknown of betting itself. He recounts some of his favorite moments, many of which haven't involved money at all. In this candid and entertaining memoir, he looks back at the times he's wagered the intangible and priceless things in life: his health, his career, and his relationships.
-
-
who needs Artie (to read)
- By B. Wenners on 08-24-18
By: Artie Lange
-
Hyena
- By: Jude Angelini
- Narrated by: Jude Angelini
- Length: 3 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Hyena is a collection of autobiographical stories by Jude Angelini, which takes the listener on his journey of heartbreak, depravity, and hilarity, deftly moving between his adult life and his childhood growing up in a factory town outside of Detroit. Each story is told with brutal honesty yet maintains a gallows humor that will leave you shaking your head in disbelief.
-
-
Awesome book, would steal it
- By Dylan S on 09-20-17
By: Jude Angelini
-
One More Thing
- Stories and Other Stories
- By: B. J. Novak
- Narrated by: B. J. Novak, Rainn Wilson, Jenna Fischer, and others
- Length: 6 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
B.J. Novak's One More Thing: Stories and Other Stories is an endlessly entertaining, surprisingly sensitive, and startlingly original debut that signals the arrival of a brilliant new voice in American fiction. A boy wins a $100,000 prize in a box of Frosted Flakes - only to discover how claiming the winnings might unravel his family. A woman sets out to seduce motivational speaker Tony Robbins - turning for help to the famed motivator himself. A new arrival in Heaven, overwhelmed with options, procrastinates over a long-ago promise to visit his grandmother....
-
-
It gets better, and better, and better, and better
- By David Shear on 02-07-14
By: B. J. Novak
-
Cut and Run
- A Light-Hearted Dark Comedy
- By: Ben Acker, Ben Blacker
- Narrated by: Meg Ryan, D’Arcy Carden, Sam Richardson, and others
- Length: 2 hrs and 44 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Samantha is a professional seductress and con artist with a heart of gold. If she talked about her work, she’d tell you she only pilfers organs for medical research and that she only takes one kidney, and she only steals those kidneys from dishonest people. It’s hell on her social life. Abe is the doctor and Sam's partner in crime. He isn’t much of a criminal. Except for the kidney stealing. But he’s using that money to fund his research that he anticipates will be able to cure diabetes. So, all for a good cause...? You decide. Of course, it's hell on his social life.
-
-
Dumb and funny
- By R. MCRACKAN on 02-01-20
By: Ben Acker, and others
Related to this topic
-
The Death of Cool
- From Teenage Rebellion to the Hangover of Adulthood
- By: Gavin McInnes
- Narrated by: Gavin McInnes
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
This is his story, or, rather, stories - lots of them, and all gut-punchingly hilarious, from that first far reach into a girl's tight jeans to turning forty with a cataclysmic party. In between you’ll hear about acid trips, threesomes, Nazi skinheads, his band Anal Chinook (Inuit for “warm wind”), Martians in northern Canada, throwing pedophiles in jail, dinner with the Clash, what happens when you crash Bill Maher's show wasted, and the true story of Vice magazine.
-
-
if you don't buy this book, the terrorists win
- By Kelsey Gholi on 04-03-17
By: Gavin McInnes
-
You're Better than Me
- A Memoir
- By: Bonnie McFarlane
- Narrated by: Bonnie McFarlane, Alexander Cendese
- Length: 7 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In the spirit of Mindy Kaling, Kelly Oxford, and Sarah Silverman, a compulsively listenable and outrageously funny memoir of growing up as a fish out of water, finding your voice, and embracing your inner crazy person from popular actress, writer, and comedian Bonnie McFarlane.
-
-
Sandy!!! She wrote a book...it's crazy, a book!!!
- By Jonathan Placek on 03-02-16
By: Bonnie McFarlane
-
Miss Fortune
- Fresh Perspectives on Having It All from Someone Who Is Not Okay
- By: Lauren Weedman
- Narrated by: Lauren Weedman
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Lauren Weedman is not okay. She's living what should be the good life in sunny Los Angeles. After a gig as a correspondent with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, she scored parts in blockbuster movies, which led to memorable recurring roles on HBO's Hung and Looking. She had a loving husband and an adorable baby boy. In these comedic essays, she turns a piercingly observant, darkly funny lens on the ways her life is actually not okay.
-
-
Good
- By Ajules29 on 04-02-16
By: Lauren Weedman
-
I Hate Everyone, Except You
- By: Clinton Kelly
- Narrated by: Clinton Kelly
- Length: 4 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Clinton Kelly is probably best known for teaching women how to make their butts look smaller. But in I Hate Everyone, Except You, he reveals some heretofore unknown secrets about himself, like that he's a finicky connoisseur of 1980s pornography, a disillusioned critic of New Jersey's premier water parks, and perhaps the world's least enthused high school commencement speaker.
-
-
Filthy language overshadowed stories
- By Doris on 04-29-17
By: Clinton Kelly
-
I Like You Just the Way I Am
- Stories About Me and Some Other People
- By: Jenny Mollen
- Narrated by: Jenny Mollen
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Jenny Mollen is an actress and writer living in Los Angeles. She is also a wife, married to a famous guy (which is annoying only because he gets free shit and she doesn't). She doesn't want much from life. Just to be loved - by everybody: her parents, her dogs, her ex-boyfriends, her ex-boyfriends' dogs, her husband, her husband's ex-girlfriends, her husband's ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends, etc.
-
-
Hmm...Why am I listening to a bio of Jenny Mollen?
- By Elisabeth W. on 09-16-15
By: Jenny Mollen
-
The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club
- True Tales from a Magnificent and Clumsy Life
- By: Laurie Notaro
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
- Length: 5 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Introducing Laurie Notaro, the leader of the Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club. Every day she fearlessly rises from bed to defeat the evil machinations of dolts, dimwits, and creepy boyfriends - and that's before she even puts on a bra. For the past 10 years, Notaro has been entertaining Phoenix newspaper readers with her wildly amusing autobiographical exploits and unique life experiences.
-
-
Sweet and funny
- By Julia Valentin on 12-19-20
By: Laurie Notaro
-
The Death of Cool
- From Teenage Rebellion to the Hangover of Adulthood
- By: Gavin McInnes
- Narrated by: Gavin McInnes
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
This is his story, or, rather, stories - lots of them, and all gut-punchingly hilarious, from that first far reach into a girl's tight jeans to turning forty with a cataclysmic party. In between you’ll hear about acid trips, threesomes, Nazi skinheads, his band Anal Chinook (Inuit for “warm wind”), Martians in northern Canada, throwing pedophiles in jail, dinner with the Clash, what happens when you crash Bill Maher's show wasted, and the true story of Vice magazine.
-
-
if you don't buy this book, the terrorists win
- By Kelsey Gholi on 04-03-17
By: Gavin McInnes
-
You're Better than Me
- A Memoir
- By: Bonnie McFarlane
- Narrated by: Bonnie McFarlane, Alexander Cendese
- Length: 7 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In the spirit of Mindy Kaling, Kelly Oxford, and Sarah Silverman, a compulsively listenable and outrageously funny memoir of growing up as a fish out of water, finding your voice, and embracing your inner crazy person from popular actress, writer, and comedian Bonnie McFarlane.
-
-
Sandy!!! She wrote a book...it's crazy, a book!!!
- By Jonathan Placek on 03-02-16
By: Bonnie McFarlane
-
Miss Fortune
- Fresh Perspectives on Having It All from Someone Who Is Not Okay
- By: Lauren Weedman
- Narrated by: Lauren Weedman
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Lauren Weedman is not okay. She's living what should be the good life in sunny Los Angeles. After a gig as a correspondent with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, she scored parts in blockbuster movies, which led to memorable recurring roles on HBO's Hung and Looking. She had a loving husband and an adorable baby boy. In these comedic essays, she turns a piercingly observant, darkly funny lens on the ways her life is actually not okay.
-
-
Good
- By Ajules29 on 04-02-16
By: Lauren Weedman
-
I Hate Everyone, Except You
- By: Clinton Kelly
- Narrated by: Clinton Kelly
- Length: 4 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Clinton Kelly is probably best known for teaching women how to make their butts look smaller. But in I Hate Everyone, Except You, he reveals some heretofore unknown secrets about himself, like that he's a finicky connoisseur of 1980s pornography, a disillusioned critic of New Jersey's premier water parks, and perhaps the world's least enthused high school commencement speaker.
-
-
Filthy language overshadowed stories
- By Doris on 04-29-17
By: Clinton Kelly
-
I Like You Just the Way I Am
- Stories About Me and Some Other People
- By: Jenny Mollen
- Narrated by: Jenny Mollen
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Jenny Mollen is an actress and writer living in Los Angeles. She is also a wife, married to a famous guy (which is annoying only because he gets free shit and she doesn't). She doesn't want much from life. Just to be loved - by everybody: her parents, her dogs, her ex-boyfriends, her ex-boyfriends' dogs, her husband, her husband's ex-girlfriends, her husband's ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends, etc.
-
-
Hmm...Why am I listening to a bio of Jenny Mollen?
- By Elisabeth W. on 09-16-15
By: Jenny Mollen
-
The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club
- True Tales from a Magnificent and Clumsy Life
- By: Laurie Notaro
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
- Length: 5 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Introducing Laurie Notaro, the leader of the Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club. Every day she fearlessly rises from bed to defeat the evil machinations of dolts, dimwits, and creepy boyfriends - and that's before she even puts on a bra. For the past 10 years, Notaro has been entertaining Phoenix newspaper readers with her wildly amusing autobiographical exploits and unique life experiences.
-
-
Sweet and funny
- By Julia Valentin on 12-19-20
By: Laurie Notaro
-
Too Bright to Hear Too Loud to See
- By: Juliann Garey
- Narrated by: Dan Butler
- Length: 11 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In her tour-de-force first novel, Juliann Garey takes us inside the restless mind, ravaged heart, and anguished soul of Greyson Todd, a successful Hollywood studio executive who leaves his wife and young daughter and for a decade travels the world giving free reign to the bipolar disorder he's been forced to keep hidden for almost 20 years.
-
-
Psychosis or Syphilis?
- By Vira on 04-02-13
By: Juliann Garey
-
God-Shaped Hole
- A Novel
- By: Tiffanie DeBartolo
- Narrated by: Rachael Warren
- Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When Beatrice Trixie Jordan replies to a personal ad, she meets Jacob Grace, a charming, effervescent 30-something free-spirit writer passionately seeking life. He possesses his own turns of phrase and ways of thinking and feeling that dissonantly harmonize with Trixie's off-center vision. As they rollercoaster through the joys and furies of their wrenching romance, they try to come to terms with the hurt brought about by both of their distant fathers who, in different ways, forsook them.
-
-
To see a fortune teller or not to see one...
- By Renee on 08-08-18
-
Digging Up Mother
- A Love Story
- By: Johnny Depp - foreword, Doug Stanhope
- Narrated by: Doug Stanhope and Friends
- Length: 12 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Doug Stanhope is one of the most critically acclaimed and stridently unrepentant comedians of his generation. What will surprise some is that he owes so much of his dark and sometimes uncomfortably honest sense of humor to his mother, Bonnie.
-
-
Not my thing.
- By J. Harral on 01-27-18
By: Johnny Depp - foreword, and others
-
I Am Not Myself These Days
- A Memoir
- By: Josh Kilmer-Purcell
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
I Am Not Myself These Days follows a glittering journey through Manhattan's dark underbelly---a shocking and surreal world where alter egos reign and subsist (barely) on dark wit and chemicals...a tragic romantic comedy where one begins by rooting for the survival of the relationship and ends by hoping someone simply survives.
-
-
depressing
- By Barry Morrison on 08-02-16
-
Dirty Thirty
- By: Asa Akira
- Narrated by: Veronica Worthington
- Length: 5 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
As she contemplates turning 30 years old while still being in the adult film trade, Asa Akira, author of the best-seller Insatiable, delves into her past, present, and future, exploring the events that brought her to where she is now and the surprising and insightful plans she has for her future. Internationally known as a porn star, Akira's perceptive, funny, and straightforward writings on love, sex, death, marriage, and celebrity come together in a surprising book of essays.
-
-
this was fun I'm going to buy her other book 2
- By Sir Lawrence on 01-09-19
By: Asa Akira
-
You're Making Me Hate You
- A Cantankerous Look at the Common Misconception That Humans Have Any Common Sense Left
- By: Corey Taylor
- Narrated by: Corey Taylor
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In the tradition of the late, great George Carlin, Corey Taylor, the lead singer of Slipknot and Stone Sour, sounds off in hilarious fashion about the many vagaries of modern life that piss him off. Whether it's people's rude behavior in restaurants and malls, the many indignities of air travel, eye-searingly terrible fashion choices, dangerously clueless drivers, and - most of all - the sorry state of much modern music, Taylor's humor and insight cover civil society's seeming decline.
-
-
New perspective.
- By jeremy on 09-22-15
By: Corey Taylor
-
True Stories from an Unreliable Eyewitness
- A Feminist Coming of Age
- By: Christine Lahti
- Narrated by: Christine Lahti
- Length: 5 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For decades, actress and director Christine Lahti has captivated the hearts and minds of her audience through iconic roles in Chicago Hope, Running on Empty, Housekeeping, And Justice for All, Swing Shift, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, God of Carnage, and The Blacklist. Now, in True Stories from an Unreliable Eyewitness, this acclaimed performer channels her creativity inward to share her own story for the first time.
-
-
Christine Lahti, Actress, Activist and A+ Author!
- By L. Cat Schultz on 10-26-18
By: Christine Lahti
-
Hyena
- By: Jude Angelini
- Narrated by: Jude Angelini
- Length: 3 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Hyena is a collection of autobiographical stories by Jude Angelini, which takes the listener on his journey of heartbreak, depravity, and hilarity, deftly moving between his adult life and his childhood growing up in a factory town outside of Detroit. Each story is told with brutal honesty yet maintains a gallows humor that will leave you shaking your head in disbelief.
-
-
Awesome book, would steal it
- By Dylan S on 09-20-17
By: Jude Angelini
-
Seduction and Snacks
- By: Tara Sivec
- Narrated by: Romy Nordlinger
- Length: 10 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Claire is a 20-something, single mom who grudgingly helps her best friend sell sex toys while she attempts to make enough money to start her own business to give her foul-mouthed, but extremely loveable (when he's asleep) toddler a better life. When Carter, the one-night-stand from her past that changed her life forever, shows up in her hometown bar without any recollection of her besides her unique chocolate scent, Claire will make it a point that he remembers her this time. With Carter's undisguised shock at suddenly finding out he has a four-year-old son and Claire's panic that her stretch marks and slim-to-none bedroom experience will send the man of her dreams heading for the hills, the pair will do whatever they can to get their happily ever after.
-
-
3 1/2 stars
- By Vinity on 08-01-13
By: Tara Sivec
-
Sex, Drugs, Ratt & Roll
- My Life in Rock
- By: Stephen Pearcy, Sam Benjamin
- Narrated by: Stephen R. Thorne
- Length: 8 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Stephen Pearcy was a scrawny, horny, thrill-seeking teenager with an electric guitar who had graduated from backyard parties in San Diego to half-empty dives in Los Angeles before he and his band broke through at Whiskey a Go Go. Cranking out metal just as metal got hot, Ratt was the perfect band at the perfect time, and their hit single "Round and Round" became a top-selling anthem.
-
-
Stephen Pearcy is one sad mf
- By Awkward Frog on 12-28-20
By: Stephen Pearcy, and others
-
Private Citizens
- By: Tony Tulathimutte
- Narrated by: Pete Cross
- Length: 12 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The story's four whip-smart narrators - idealistic Cory, Internet-lurking Will, awkward Henrik, and vicious Linda - are torn between fixing the world and cannibalizing it. In boisterous prose that ricochets between humor and pain, the four estranged friends stagger through the Bay Area's maze of tech startups, protestors, gentrifiers, karaoke bars, house parties, and cultish self-help seminars, washing up in each other's lives once again.
-
-
Too dour and cynical.
- By Zanriel on 01-18-17
-
Dear Girls Above Me
- Inspired by a True Story
- By: Charles McDowell
- Narrated by: Kirby Heyborne
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When Charlie McDowell began sharing his open letters to his noisy upstairs neighbors - two impossibly ditzy female roommates in their mid-twenties - on Twitter, his feed quickly went viral. His followers multiplied and he got the attention of everyone from celebrities to production studios to major media outlets such as Time and Glamour.
Now Dear Girls breaks out of the 140-character limit as Charlie imagines what would happen if he put the wisdom of the girls to the test.
-
-
An Enjoyable Listen
- By Elle W on 11-05-13
By: Charles McDowell
What listeners say about Happy Endings
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
- Patrick
- 03-17-08
Monster RAIN!!!!!!!!!!
An absolutely magnificent listen. Nothing like hearing the raunchy and cringing stories of Jim Norton read by Yimmy. You will not be disappointed by your purchase of this audio book.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Seancfh01
- 11-09-16
I love little Jimmy
vile, offensive, and wonderful. Exactly what I wanted out of this book. Actually LOL'D. Good show sir.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Stephen Osborne
- 01-08-23
Great for a Norton fan
Great for a fan of Jim Norton I highly recommend this audiobook for almost anyone.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
- Amazon Customer
- 07-20-07
I like this book more than exclamation points!!!!!
This book is so much funnier than the comic strip Howard Huge, that I give it a Big A! James makes it his dooty to make us loff, again and again, so much it gives me the twitchels. E-Rocks! I can't wait to listen to the rest, but the first 7 minutes have been great! If I had a Nicolini for every time I LOL'd, I'd be a fancy man....................... aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand I can only sum up with one word: Frunkus (which means "Meow" in the ancient Norden dialect).
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
2 people found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Robert
- 01-17-15
Manboobs is funny.
funny book by a sex addict maniac . one laughs interrupted only by occasional vomiting in the mouth from nightmare -inducing head -shaking stories of sex, farting , whores and other perverse gluttony .
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Rodney
- 10-26-18
Still great
I bought this book when it first came out and enjoyed, however I hadn't read it since then so I picked it up as an audiobook and it's great, a really fun read. I was worried that it would be the same stories I've heard and while that is true to some extent, it's not nearly as repetitive as I was thinking it would be. If you like Norton, or you're an old O&A fan, you can't go here, you get over 5 hours of entertainment from Jimmy.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
- John
- 10-26-08
Inane babblings of a raunch comic looking for love
I can't believe this guy could even read a book let alone write one, but here it is. Having the author read the book to me was a special experience, especially since I usually listened to it while sitting at my desk at work. Picturing him under the porch performing oral favors for his little friends, when he was younger, made me giggle like a schoolgirl.
From time to time I'd get caught by coworkers actually laughing out loud, or saying something like "I can't believe he said that". If you're expecting it to be funny you'll be severely disappointed. His book is nothing like his stand-up act. His act is actually pretty funny. The book, on the other hand, and especially his reading of it, really made me feel sorry for him.
I hope he finally realizes that he's been looking for love on the wrong side gym floor. It's obvious to probably everyone but him, that he gets much more sexual gratification from the company of men, than anything he gets from the women in his life; and that includes all the professionals he turns to, some of whom are really men dressed as women. (a fact he pretends not to be aware of) He's spent his entire adult life trying to accept his love of penis. Even when he's with a woman, pro or otherwise, he usually has to finish up on his own, because he can't finish unless he's touching one. It's high time he started to enjoy life, and started dancing in the Monster Rain.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Harlan
- 12-22-17
creative mastermind
Really funny, this sick little perverts mind goes beyond anything I could imagine, good stories about being a mediocre comic with less interesting friends. A need to spill seed like it's the only thing keeping him alive and the weirdest fantasized exploits EVER satisfying beyond reason. Thanks to lil Jimmy, Ted Sheckler, Earl, Uncle Paul and the rest.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- trond
- 10-23-16
Funniest book ever
Great book. Must be one of the sickest heads in this world. Laught my as off through the hole story.. Absolutely recommended!!
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
- Eileen
- 11-11-08
Pretty Much What I Expected
The story Jim Norton tells in this book is as I expected, being a listener of Opie & Anthony. Norton does not hide behind anything in this book, his stories are graphic, personal, and filled with a lot of self-deprecation. He's a great narrator, I couldn't imagine anyone else reading his story, and he does a great job presenting the stories. If you are a fan of his stand-up, I recommend the book.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful