If Only He Knew
A Valuable Guide to Knowing, Understanding, and Loving Your Wife
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Narrated by:
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Maurice England
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By:
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Dr. Gary Smalley
About this listen
Over 600,000 copies sold!
The perfect guide for husbands who want to love their wives and strengthen their marriages in a way like never before.
So you want your wife to:
- Understand you
- Appreciate you
- Be more responsive sexually
- Support you during hard times
- Admire you
- Share your interests
- Listen to what you have to say
In this revised and updated edition of his classic best seller, Gary Smalley explains a woman's deepest needs, shows men how to meet those needs, and gives 10 simple steps to strengthen any marriage. He helps men to understand not only how to respond to a woman's feelings, but also how to make her feel important.
Using the latest research, humorous, and touching illustrations from his own life, as well as case histories and biblical examples, Gary Smalley maps a blueprint to a better marriage that will have a deep and lasting impact on men and their wives.
Companion to For Better or for Best. Spanish edition also available.
Download the accompanying reference guide.©2012 Gary Smalley (P)2012 ZondervanListeners also enjoyed...
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Lies about marriage are rampant in our culture and the church. They’re killing marriages. But the corresponding truths can strengthen marriages and even save the most troubled relationships. In this audiobook, marriage experts Greg Smalley and Robert Paul identify the lies, explain how they work to destroy marriages, and reveal the truths that not only can improve marriages, but rescue those that are floundering.
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Not new, contradictory and biblically inaccurate
- By thor on 04-07-21
By: Greg Smalley, and others
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The DNA of Relationships
- By: Dr. Gary Smalley
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 6 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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We are designed for relationships, yet they often bring us pain. In this paradigm-shifting book, Gary Smalley unravels the DNA of relationships: we are made for three great relationships, with God, others, and ourselves, and all relationships involve choice. Gary exposes a destructive relationship dance that characterizes nearly every relationship conflict, and he offers five new dance steps that will revolutionize relationships.
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Could be half as long
- By Christine on 01-06-08
By: Dr. Gary Smalley
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We Love Each Other, But . . .
- Simple Secrets to Strengthen Your Relationship and Make Love Last
- By: Ellen Wachtel
- Narrated by: Joyce Bean
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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We Love Each Other, But... offers simple, practical tips that will help you restore and strengthen a relationship that has gone off track. It lays out the nuts and bolts of building relationships so they continue to be gratifying over the long haul. Dr. Ellen Wachtel shows how, even when you feel like giving up on a relationship or marriage, you can recapture why you fell in love in the first place. Dr. Wachtel promises that there is more and suggests simple ways to keep vitality in relationships.
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Some interesting material
- By Scott on 10-25-12
By: Ellen Wachtel
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Loving Him Well
- Practical Advice on Influencing Your Husband
- By: Gary Thomas, Lisa Thomas - foreword
- Narrated by: Gary Thomas
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Women: you're not alone in your marriage. You never have been, and you never will be. While it may not always feel like it, God desires for you to have a relationally healthy, emotionally engaged, and spiritually mature husband with whom you can share your days. In Loving Him Well, Gary Thomas builds on concepts from his best-selling book Sacred Marriage to reveal the inner workings of a man's heart and mind. He delves into Scriptures that help women gain biblical insight to influence their husbands.
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A must read for any wife!
- By James on 04-03-18
By: Gary Thomas, and others
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10 Stupid Things Couples Do To Mess Up Their Relationships
- By: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Narrated by: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Length: 2 hrs and 37 mins
- Abridged
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In Ten Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Relationships, Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls for a return to traditional courtship. Courtship allows couples and their families to get acquainted with each other over a longer period of time, and provides structure and guidelines for that important process.
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No brainer ideas that we can forget
- By Ali0531 on 07-06-15
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Discovering the Mind of a Woman
- The Key to Becoming a Strong and Irresistible Husband Is...
- By: Ken Nair
- Narrated by: Henry Haggard
- Length: 8 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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As the founder and president of Life Partners, a renowned discipleship ministry, bestselling author Ken Nair has discipled more than five hundred men in how to become more Christlike husbands—all of whom have experienced renewal and restoration in their relationships. Now, he's here to help you do the same. Drawing from stories from his own marriage, as well as the journeys of countless husbands whose marriages were dissolving, Nair reveals major roadblocks in life and in marriage.
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Challenging and convicting
- By MH3 on 07-08-23
By: Ken Nair
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The Kindness Challenge
- Thirty Days to Improve Any Relationship
- By: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Narrated by: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Length: 4 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Shaunti Feldhahn helps listeners transform any relationship by making three small changes! In a new approach for Shaunti, this book is a cross between a major research study, a self-help book, and a daily step-by-step habit-building plan. It shows listeners how to apply the surprising relationship insights revealed in her earlier million-copy best sellers, why certain actions matter so much, and a specific 30-day plan on what to do to build a very simple habit that will change any relationship for the better.
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Challenge Accepted!
- By SoS1234 on 01-11-17
By: Shaunti Feldhahn
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The Respect Dare
- 40 Days to a Deeper Connection with God and Your Husband
- By: Nina Roesner
- Narrated by: Sarah Zimmerman
- Length: 3 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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"A long and happy marriage." It sounds like the end of a fairy tale - an illusion that modern times have exposed. And it is, if marriage depends on a constant stream of romantic emotion, or even on copious amounts of time or money. Thank the Lord, none of those are necessary. Two thousand years ago, Paul gave women the key to a successful marriage, and it can be summed up in two words: unconditional respect. It's not popular. It doesn't sound fair. It can be hard to imagine. But it works. Nina Roesner has led countless women through this practical and life-changing journey, and in The Respect Dare she offers you the hope that so many others have found. Day by day, true stories and thought-provoking questions will help you apply biblical wisdom to the most important relationship in your life.
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Could not listen to narrator's voice :/
- By aylo on 11-17-21
By: Nina Roesner
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The Argument-Free Marriage
- 28 Days to Creating the Marriage You've Always Wanted with the Spouse You Already Have
- By: Fawn Weaver
- Narrated by: Michelle Lasley
- Length: 5 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Is an argument-free marriage possible? Fawn Weaver's answer is yes, absolutely, even when one or both partners are strong willed, independent, and opinionated. (She admits to being all three.) In this groundbreaking book, the best-selling author and award-winning marriage blogger asks listeners to invest 28 days in learning how to live together without bickering, blame, angry outbursts, or silent treatments.
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very hard to relate to
- By Abby on 02-01-23
By: Fawn Weaver
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For Women Only, Revised and Updated Edition
- What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men
- By: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Narrated by: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Length: 4 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Discover the truth he wants you to know! The man in your life is keeping secrets. They’re so deep inside he barely knows they're there, much less how to talk to you about them. Yet he genuinely wants you to "get" him - to understand his inner life, his fears, his needs... In her landmark best seller For Women Only, Shaunti Feldhahn reveals what every woman - single or married - needs to know.
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Life changing
- By Jill on 10-19-13
By: Shaunti Feldhahn
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Winning your wife back from emotional or physical separation is more than doing the same things with more intensity. It involves developing a whole new strategy to overcome what seem to be overwhelming odds to attain a come-from-behind victory. In Winning Your Wife Back Before It's Too late, Gary Smalley utilizes a game plan to significantly increase your chances for a "miracle comeback".
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This book gave me peace and taught me self-compassion.
- By Elide on 05-06-24
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Crack the code on what motivates your man and how you can build a better marriage together! In this revised and updated edition of his classic best seller, Gary Smalley explains how women can use their natural, God-given qualities to build a better marriage. He helps women understand not only the way men think, but also how to move a man's heart. Gary Smalley offers an insider's perspective into the world of men, including practical help and application so wives can deepen their relationships with their husbands and build a lasting marriage.
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for better or for best
- By Otniel on 04-25-16
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What Radical Husbands Do
- 12 Steps to Win and Keep Your Wife's Heart
- By: Regi Campbell
- Narrated by: Chris Arias
- Length: 3 hrs and 12 mins
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What Radical Husbands Do is a book written by a man for men. It gives people things to do not to be. No "psycho-babble", "religion", or "feel-good frills". Just straight up advice from a guy who has screwed up and learned how to make his marriage work through hard times. Marriage isn't a game of chance. Are you willing to put your chips on the table and go all-in to win and keep your wife's heart? This book shows you how.
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Hits the nail on the head!
- By RP_Greenfield06 on 09-12-23
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For Men Only (Revised and Updated Edition)
- A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women
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- Narrated by: Jeff Feldhahn
- Length: 3 hrs and 22 mins
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Finally, you can understand her! If you're like most men, you've burned up lots of energy trying to figure out what a woman wants, what makes her tick, and how to make her happy. The good news: success is simpler than you thought. In their groundbreaking classic, For Men Only, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn reveal the eye opening truths and simple acts that will radically improve your relationship with the woman you love.
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Really helpfull!
- By kristie bento on 03-18-15
By: Shaunti Feldhahn, and others
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The Bulletproof Husband
- How to Get Rid of Arguments, Save Your Marriage and Never Feel Emasculated Again
- By: Jonathan Welton, Endre Gabori, John Scannell, and others
- Narrated by: Jonathan Welton
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Your wife has been giving you signals to tell you something is wrong and one day, you wake up to a slap in the face. She says something along the lines of: I want to separate, I need some space to figure things out, I think we should divorce, I can’t do this anymore, I cheated on you, or the classic ‘I love you but I’m not in love with you.’
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Book for abusers
- By Amazon Customer on 03-14-24
By: Jonathan Welton, and others
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Winning Your Husband Back Before It's Too Late
- Whether He's Left Physically or Emotionally All That Matters Is...
- By: Gary Smalley, Dr. Greg Smalley
- Narrated by: Milton Bagby
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Winning your husband back necessitates more than simply rearranging the old stuff in your relationship. You may decide to fight differently than you did in the past, but if the old unresolved anger is allowed to remain, then nothing will genuinely change in our marriage. Winning Your Husband Back Before It's Too Late targets the foundational weaknesses in your marriage.
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Winning Your Wife Back Before It's Too Late
- Whether She's Left Physically or Emotionally All That Matters Is...
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Winning your wife back from emotional or physical separation is more than doing the same things with more intensity. It involves developing a whole new strategy to overcome what seem to be overwhelming odds to attain a come-from-behind victory. In Winning Your Wife Back Before It's Too late, Gary Smalley utilizes a game plan to significantly increase your chances for a "miracle comeback".
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This book gave me peace and taught me self-compassion.
- By Elide on 05-06-24
By: Gary Smalley, and others
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For Better or for Best
- A Valuable Guide to Knowing, Understanding, and Loving your Husband
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- Narrated by: Maurice England
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Crack the code on what motivates your man and how you can build a better marriage together! In this revised and updated edition of his classic best seller, Gary Smalley explains how women can use their natural, God-given qualities to build a better marriage. He helps women understand not only the way men think, but also how to move a man's heart. Gary Smalley offers an insider's perspective into the world of men, including practical help and application so wives can deepen their relationships with their husbands and build a lasting marriage.
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for better or for best
- By Otniel on 04-25-16
By: Dr. Gary Smalley
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What Radical Husbands Do
- 12 Steps to Win and Keep Your Wife's Heart
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What Radical Husbands Do is a book written by a man for men. It gives people things to do not to be. No "psycho-babble", "religion", or "feel-good frills". Just straight up advice from a guy who has screwed up and learned how to make his marriage work through hard times. Marriage isn't a game of chance. Are you willing to put your chips on the table and go all-in to win and keep your wife's heart? This book shows you how.
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Hits the nail on the head!
- By RP_Greenfield06 on 09-12-23
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For Men Only (Revised and Updated Edition)
- A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women
- By: Shaunti Feldhahn, Jeff Feldhahn
- Narrated by: Jeff Feldhahn
- Length: 3 hrs and 22 mins
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Finally, you can understand her! If you're like most men, you've burned up lots of energy trying to figure out what a woman wants, what makes her tick, and how to make her happy. The good news: success is simpler than you thought. In their groundbreaking classic, For Men Only, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn reveal the eye opening truths and simple acts that will radically improve your relationship with the woman you love.
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Really helpfull!
- By kristie bento on 03-18-15
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The Bulletproof Husband
- How to Get Rid of Arguments, Save Your Marriage and Never Feel Emasculated Again
- By: Jonathan Welton, Endre Gabori, John Scannell, and others
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Your wife has been giving you signals to tell you something is wrong and one day, you wake up to a slap in the face. She says something along the lines of: I want to separate, I need some space to figure things out, I think we should divorce, I can’t do this anymore, I cheated on you, or the classic ‘I love you but I’m not in love with you.’
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Book for abusers
- By Amazon Customer on 03-14-24
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The DNA of Relationships
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We are designed for relationships, yet they often bring us pain. In this paradigm-shifting book, Gary Smalley unravels the DNA of relationships: we are made for three great relationships, with God, others, and ourselves, and all relationships involve choice. Gary exposes a destructive relationship dance that characterizes nearly every relationship conflict, and he offers five new dance steps that will revolutionize relationships.
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Could be half as long
- By Christine on 01-06-08
By: Dr. Gary Smalley
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One More Try
- What to Do When Your Marriage Is Falling Apart
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- Narrated by: Jon Gauger
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Is your marriage worth fighting for? If so, this audiobook is for you. It takes a tremendous amount of strength to overcome skepticism and weariness, and begin the work of healing a broken marriage. But just taking a look at this audiobook shows you have the heart of a fighter. In One More Try, Gary Chapman gives you the courage and confidence to move forward when your marriage is falling apart.
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Save Your Marriage Positive Read
- By Priscilla on 07-23-15
By: Gary Chapman
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Stop Hurting the Woman You Love
- Breaking the Cycle of Abusive Behavior
- By: Charlie Donaldson MA, Randy Flood MA, Elaine Eldridge PhD
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 6 hrs and 18 mins
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End the cycle of abuse-for good. Authors Charlie Donaldson, Randy Flood, and Elaine Eldridge uncover a proven action plan that violent men can use to change their behavior. Filled with insightful questionnaires and actual case histories, the essential how-to book Stop Hurting the Woman You Love, will help end abusive patterns in favor of healthier, happier relationships....
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Saved us from a divorce!
- By Anonymous User on 11-15-21
By: Charlie Donaldson MA, and others
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The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
- A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert, Revised and Updated
- By: John M. Gottman PhD, Nan Silver
- Narrated by: Eric Michael Summerer
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Just as Masters and Johnson were pioneers in the study of human sexuality, so Dr. John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage. As a professor of psychology at the University of Washington and the founder and director of the Seattle Marital and Family Institute, he has studied the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over the course of many years. His findings, and his heavily attended workshops, have already turned around thousands of faltering marriages.
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not a good audiobook
- By jynlyn on 09-02-20
By: John M. Gottman PhD, and others
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His Needs, Her Needs
- Building a Marriage That Lasts
- By: Dr. Willard F. Harley Jr.
- Narrated by: Dr. Willard F. Harley Jr.
- Length: 7 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Time after time, His Needs, Her Needs has topped the charts as the best-selling marriage book available. In this classic book, Dr. Willard F. Harley, Jr., identifies the 10 most vital needs of men and women and shows husbands and wives how to make their marriage sizzle by satisfying those needs in their spouses. He provides guidance for becoming irresistible to your spouse and for loving more creatively and sensitively, thereby eliminating the problems that often lead to conflict and even extramarital affairs.
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Easy read! Every couple should read this book!
- By Derek Benson on 10-01-20
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Loving Your Spouse When You Feel Like Walking Away
- By: Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
When you said, “I do”, you entered marriage with high hopes, dreaming it would be supremely happy. You never intended for it to be miserable. Millions of couples are struggling in desperate marriages. But the story doesn’t have to end there. Dr. Gary Chapman writes, “I believe that in every troubled marriage, one or both partners can take positive steps that have the potential for changing the emotional climate in their marriage.”
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encouragement through another chance
- By Brookley on 09-19-18
By: Gary Chapman
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The Complete Husband, Revised and Expanded
- A Practical Guide for Improved Biblical Husbanding
- By: Lou Priolo
- Narrated by: Jim Denison
- Length: 10 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Being a consistently biblical husband is not for the faint of heart! God has given husbands huge responsibilities to their wives, but the good news is that God also gives husbands the grace and resources to obey his commands. Experienced biblical counselor Lou Priolo delves deep into the skills, goals, and attitudes a God-honoring husband must develop, giving practical advice throughout. If you've ever wondered how to best protect, please, and lead your wife, how to communicate with her, how to disagree with her—even how to talk to her!—you will find comprehensive guidance here.
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Great marriage manual
- By Armando B on 10-25-24
By: Lou Priolo
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The Naked Marriage
- By: Dave Willis, Ashley Willis
- Narrated by: Dave Willis, Ashley Willis
- Length: 5 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Imagine a marriage with complete intimacy, vulnerability, transparency, and trust. Imagine a marriage rooted in faith, friendship, and mutual fulfillment. Imagine a marriage with amazing sex, but where great sex is only the icing on the cake. This might all sound too good to be true, but it's actually what God designed marriage to be, and he doesn't want you settling for anything less.
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Amazing read
- By Weaver on 03-03-20
By: Dave Willis, and others
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How to Listen, Hear, and Validate
- Break Through Invisible Barriers and Transform Your Relationships (How to be More Likable and Charismatic, Book 11)
- By: Patrick King
- Narrated by: Russell Newton
- Length: 3 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
How to Listen, Hear, and Validate is all about our top communication struggle - our tendency to react instead of respond, and forget that our goal is to build bridges rather than walls. You’ll learn what you’ve been doing wrong, and why your efforts at getting closer to people - in deep or light manners - have failed. You’ll learn actionable techniques and frameworks to have the most productive conversations of your life - ones that will walk away with people praising how empathetic you are.
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Plagiarized
- By Exactly My Point on 12-07-21
By: Patrick King
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When Sorry Isn't Enough
- Making Things Right with Those You Love
- By: Gary Chapman, Jennifer Thomas
- Narrated by: Kelly Ryan Dolan
- Length: 4 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Even in the best of relationships, all of us make mistakes. We do and say things we later regret and hurt the people we love most. So we need to make things right. But simply saying you’re sorry is usually not enough. In this audio book, #1 New York Times best-selling author Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas unveil new ways to effectively approach and mend fractured relationships. Even better, you’ll discover how meaningful apologies provide the power to make your friendships, family, and marriage stronger than ever before.
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Everybody should read this book at least once.
- By Chev-it on 01-27-15
By: Gary Chapman, and others
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How to Get a Man to Cherish You...If You're His Wife
- A No-Nonsense Guide for Every Wife or Bride-to-Be
- By: Stephan Labossiere
- Narrated by: Stephan Speaks
- Length: 2 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Everything that the book suggests is to make him fall deeper in love with you - meaning, a man who already likes or loves you. But you want that deep, long-lasting connection that helps relationships last 10 or 20 years. According to research and actual couples I've coached or known personally, it helps get them through times that break most relationships.
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Narration is the best!
- By A. Demichael on 04-16-21
-
We Love Each Other, But . . .
- Simple Secrets to Strengthen Your Relationship and Make Love Last
- By: Ellen Wachtel
- Narrated by: Joyce Bean
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
-
Story
We Love Each Other, But... offers simple, practical tips that will help you restore and strengthen a relationship that has gone off track. It lays out the nuts and bolts of building relationships so they continue to be gratifying over the long haul. Dr. Ellen Wachtel shows how, even when you feel like giving up on a relationship or marriage, you can recapture why you fell in love in the first place. Dr. Wachtel promises that there is more and suggests simple ways to keep vitality in relationships.
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Some interesting material
- By Scott on 10-25-12
By: Ellen Wachtel
What listeners say about If Only He Knew
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- GA
- 09-22-23
Great book on marriage
Great book on marriage would re Great book on marriage commend!
Great book on marriage
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- Joshua & Michelle
- 12-11-12
Helpful Information
If you could sum up If Only He Knew in three words, what would they be?
Christian, Spiritual, Relationship
If you’ve listened to books by Gary Smalley before, how does this one compare?
Among the best of his works
Which scene was your favorite?
Points made about communication and expectations
What did you learn from If Only He Knew that you would use in your daily life?
Preparation for married life.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 03-19-18
I couldn’t have said it any better myself!
I couldn’t have said it any better myself. Nice to know I’m not alone on this journey.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Stephen Venugopal
- 03-14-21
Incredible info and well written
I wish I had read this book 20 years ago. The information is unbelievable plus it is presented in a very digestible way.
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1 person found this helpful
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- James Taylor
- 01-20-23
A Good Book for Husbands Wanting to be Better
I was looking for a book that would help me become a better husband. I wouldn't say I was doing poorly, but was definitely falling into a rut. I saw the positive reviews for this book and gave it a shot.
First off, this is a not a quick list of actions to patch things up so you can go back to being your old self. The author emphasizes that you have to keep working at it always. He provides many habits that would be well worth following by any spouse.
The author provides many real life examples to illustrate what to do and not do and how your actions affect your relationship. He provided lots of actionable advice and good questions which I was able to discuss with my wife.
Ultimately, my take away from this book is that I must take responsibility for happiness in my marriage. And I think this idea really rings true now days when everyone seems to come at relationships with a "what's in it for me?" attitude. I really enjoyed this book and think many husbands and wives would benefit from listening to it.
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- Christopher S. Hightower
- 08-07-18
Best Book for Husbands
If you are a husband, or plan to be one some day, READ THIS BOOK!!! It will save you so much heartache and frustration as you learn to live with that woman God gave you.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Martelli
- 03-09-16
Practical advice
This book is amazing, I especially like that the author put his personal life in the lines, he truly shows that these things did not come by chance, but by failures, errors, and practical lessons he learned over many years. I will do my best as a husband to apply these principles in my marriage, and I will watch our marriage bloom. I encourage you from a man to a man to take the time, listen and apply the lessons in this boom
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3 people found this helpful
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- James Calvin Tibbs II
- 03-16-15
Mandatory for most Men
Loved it. Have recommended this book to several men in my congregation. Smalley breaks it down.
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- Jose
- 05-04-15
Introspective
It help get out of my defense mode and show a better version of myself
I was about to quit listening around chapter 5 when it made the click
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- Whysoserious
- 06-28-22
Very.... Straight forward.
Narrator top tear.
The ideals in this book was biblical. Granted I am apart of a different variation of Christianity with slightly different viewpoints regarding Bible truths.
The facts provided by the author was pristine in identifying the areas of change. This book is on my repeat list.
Fantastic material.
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