Life Sucks After You Die
Twice Bitten, Book 1
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Narrated by:
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Danielle Muething
About this listen
What do you get when you mix an incubus bite with a vampire bite?
A shitastrophe.
All I wanted to do was go to a bar and drown my sorrows in some alcohol, but I had to get attacked by an incubus. Now, I'm being guarded by a hunky but oh-so-irritating vampire (who bit me, too) while the incubus stalks me.
Being guarded by the sexy vampire probably wouldn't be that bad if not for the fact that my perfect boss has finally noticed me. Try dating while a vampire guards you way too closely and an incubus tracks your every move, waiting to pounce.
Then, there's some creepy hunter guy who also wants to kill me. The sun wants to kill me. Human food wants to kill me. Don't even get me started on my family.
Life sucks after you die!
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Once, Sarah Bingham's biggest challenge was making her students pay attention in class. Now, after rescuing a wounded stranger, she's landed in the middle of a battle between corrupt vampires and powerful immortals who also need blood to survive. Roland Warbrook is the most compelling man Sarah has ever laid hands on. But his desire for her is mingled with a hunger he can barely control...
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Luscious, Enthralling & Sensual w/o being porn
- By Linda on 08-16-11
By: Dianne Duvall
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Chase Me
- Broke and Beautiful Series, Book 1
- By: Tessa Bailey
- Narrated by: Rachel Dulude
- Length: 7 hrs and 6 mins
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College drop-out Roxy Cumberland moved to New York with dreams of becoming an actress, but her dwindling bank account is quickly putting the kibosh on that fantasy. To make some quick cash, she signs up to perform singing telegrams. Her first customer is a gorgeous, cocky Manhattan trust-funder if she ever laid eyes on one. And what could be more humiliating than singing an ode to his junk, courtesy of his last one-night stand? Maybe the fact that she's dressed in a giant pink bunny costume....
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Loved it
- By Kathleen D. on 12-26-20
By: Tessa Bailey
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A Girl's Guide to Vampires
- By: Katie MacAlister
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 13 hrs and 15 mins
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Joy Randall's Top-five tips for vampire hunters: Location, location, location. Vampires won't be caught dead (ha!) in places like discos, 10-minute lube shops, or Switzerland. Remember, if you wouldn't be there, neither would a bloodsucker. Trust your eyes. You know the handsome, annoyingly arrogant, self-assured man in the shadows with long hair and a cleft in his chin? He's your vampire. No matter how tempting it might be, do not "accidentally" acquire a paper cut on your finger and suggest your vampire kiss it to make it better....
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Female lead too stupid to live
- By Jessica on 02-04-13
By: Katie MacAlister
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Wild Hunger
- Heirs of Chicagoland Series, Book 1
- By: Chloe Neill
- Narrated by: Suzanne Elise Freeman
- Length: 11 hrs and 34 mins
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In the first thrilling installment of Chloe Neill's spinoff to the New York Times best-selling Chicagoland Vampires series, a new vampire will find out just how deep blood ties run. As the only vampire child ever born, some believed Elisa Sullivan had all the luck. But the magic that helped bring her into the world left her with a dark secret. Shifter Connor Keene, the only son of North American Central Pack Apex Gabriel Keene, is the only one she trusts with it. But she's a vampire and the daughter of a Master and a Sentinel, and he's prince of the Pack and its future king.
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Rated PG 13 for violence; no intimacy!
- By V from Kansas on 03-05-19
By: Chloe Neill
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Rhapsody
- The Butcher and the Violinist, Book 1
- By: Kenya Wright
- Narrated by: Blake Stanton, Cami Darian
- Length: 12 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Jean-Pierre’s greatest gift was a lack of feelings. His past had ripped them away. But then he saw Eden. Onstage, she played her violin, spinning his head with songs he’d tried to forget. Unable to stop himself, he makes Eden his obsession. And unlike any normal man, he takes what he wants. But there’s someone in the shadows blocking his path. His plans for Eden won’t be so simple. This mystery person sends Russians his way, igniting a war with the Bratva. It’s too bad that there’s no limit to his obsession for her - no force that can stop him, no bullet to get in his way.
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Best Narrators, straight Sexy + worth while story
- By Lawanda G. on 10-30-19
By: Kenya Wright
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Hidden
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- By: Rebecca Zanetti
- Narrated by: Roger Wayne
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Malcolm West is fleeing the hell he unleashed in his last assignment as an undercover cop. A backwoods bungalow sounds like the perfect place to start over. Until he discovers he's been set up....
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This series had a bumpy start
- By V from Kansas on 05-18-19
By: Rebecca Zanetti
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The Slaughtered Lamb Bookstore and Bar
- Sam Quinn Series, Book 1
- By: Seana Kelly
- Narrated by: Samantha Desz
- Length: 9 hrs and 39 mins
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Welcome to The Slaughtered Lamb Bookstore and Bar. I'm Sam Quinn, the werewolf book nerd in charge. I run my business by one simple rule: Everyone needs a good book and a stiff drink, be they vampire, wicche, demon, or fae. No wolves, though. Ever. I serve the supernatural community of San Francisco. We've been having some problems lately. Okay, I'm the one with the problems. The broken body of a female werewolf washed up on my doorstep. What makes sweat pool at the base of my spine, though, is realizing the scars she bears are identical to the ones I conceal.
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potential emotional triggers
- By Sharon on 06-21-21
By: Seana Kelly
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Dublin Nights Series Box Set: On the Edge & On the Line
- By: Brittney Sahin
- Narrated by: Will Watt, Kelsey Navarro
- Length: 13 hrs and 34 mins
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The Dublin Nights box set includes the contemporary romantic suspense titles, On the Edge and On the Line. On the Edge: From a horse farm in Kentucky to Dublin, Ireland - falling for her hot Irish boss is not part of the plan. Billionaire businessman by day, fighter by night...On the Line: On the day of Adam and Anna's wedding, she won't be there, and he'll lay everything on the line to get her back.
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Boring and slow
- By Conchita on 09-17-21
By: Brittney Sahin
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Thanks Fur Last Night
- By: Eve Langlais, Milly Taiden, Kate Baxter
- Narrated by: Chandra Skyye
- Length: 11 hrs and 57 mins
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When bar owner Devon Kincaid finds a bleeding man - a hot, hard, handsome, naked bleeding man - in the snow one night, she brings him home to care for him. He's definitely not like any man she's ever met before, but what she doesn't realize is that he's not just a man.
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Not as punny as the title would suggest
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 01-19-24
By: Eve Langlais, and others
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Insidious
- The Marked Mage Chronicles, Book 1
- By: Victoria Evers
- Narrated by: Jennifer O'Donnell
- Length: 14 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Since moving to Mystic Harbor, Maine, I've made it my life's mission to avoid Reese Blackburn at all costs. Sure, he has cheekbones that could cut glass, not to mention bedroom eyes that could melt any girl into a puddle on the floor. Too bad that doesn't change the fact he's completely stab-worthy. When a fun night out on the town turns deadly, I quickly discover the quaint little hamlet of Mystic Harbor houses more than sandy beaches and adorable B&Bs. Beneath the New England charm rests a world where shifters, demons, vampires, and angelic hunters all vie for power.
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Awesome series start!!
- By Leyla on 10-24-17
By: Victoria Evers
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Soul Savers Boxset: Books 1-3
- By: Kristie Cook
- Narrated by: Erin Mallon
- Length: 34 hrs and 14 mins
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Overall
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When Alexis Ames is attacked by creatures that can't be real, she decides it's time she learns who she really is, with or without the help of her mother, who guards their family's secrets closely. After meeting the inhumanly attractive, multi-talented Tristan Knight, however, Alexis retreats behind her façade of normalcy...until she discovers he's not exactly normal either. Then, their secrets begin to unravel.
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Interesting
- By C. Tansy on 05-22-23
By: Kristie Cook
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The Player
- By: J. R. Ward
- Narrated by: Emily Beresford
- Length: 7 hrs and 43 mins
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Ruthless might as well be Gray Bennett’s middle name. When the renowned Washington, D.C. insider talks, powerful people listen. But Gray hasn’t come home to Saranac Lake to play politics. Or play at all. A tragedy has shaken the unshakable Gray Bennett to his hardened core. And so has the most unlikely of women. The mousy redhead who used to run around the Moorehouse B and B - the one he never noticed - is now all fiery hair and lush curves. But sweet Joy Moorehouse is too innocent for a cynic like him.
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DO NOT ORDER
- By M. Gould on 05-31-12
By: J. R. Ward
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Valerie Darkmore’s entire life has been building up to this moment - her initiation into the Marionettes, the prestigious league of witches sworn to serve the vampires. As one of the last remaining blood witches, her spot is almost guaranteed. At least, so she’d thought. The academy is full of sabotage and secrets as the tasks begin, and Valerie quickly realizes she has more than her spot on the line. Her survival seems just as uncertain. The closer she gets to the final trial, the more she learns everything - and everyone - around her isn’t quite what it seems.
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This was good!
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Infinity Chronicles, Book 1
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New town, new school. Same story. I'm Laura, I've spent most of my life crisscrossing the county yielding to the whims of my transient mother. We've never stayed in one place long enough to call it home, and I don't have any hope of that changing. I follow the rules; no drawing attention to myself, no friends, and especially, no boys.
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Anti-climatic
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The Shadow of Fate: Gemma's Prequel
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How can Peter confess his feelings for Gemma without ruining what they have? Perhaps the right moment is a trip to Split Rock Falls, the spectacular waterfalls not too far from town. There, surrounded by the beauty of unspoiled woods and crystal waters, Peter will finally be able to reveal what is in his heart, and Gemma will understand that the two of them are meant for each other. But Peter does not realize that Gemma's destiny has already been written...
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Short prequel
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What listeners say about Life Sucks After You Die
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Performance
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- Nicholette
- 04-28-21
It had promise
I thought this could be a pretty interesting story, but the heroine was awful. I get wanting to write a strong female lead, but this went past strong and into obstinate brat territory doing horrible things and calling for her man to save her. Plus she had so many poisonous ideas about the women around her it was almost painful to read all that insecurity.
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Performance
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- Lauryn G.
- 12-02-20
Good
I liked the story but didn’t like the main character. She was very whiny and that’s a big turnoff for me. Other than that it was an enjoyable listen. I was given a free copy for an honest review.
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- SupermeanRose
- 11-11-21
I wanted to like it
I like the premise of this book and they gave their paranormals a different history and weaknesses. But the main character is supposed to be a mature adult and yet acts like a spoiled teenager. She is supposed to be so insecure and acts like a fool yet they try and portray her as a sting independent woman who won’t let a man run her. She is so contradictory that it makes you wonder at the plan for her character to grow. She supposedly makes a decision to help the others and then turns around and makes the same mistake she had already made earlier in the book. He denial and lack of accountability screamed child and yet she’s a late 20s marketing executive .
I’m hopping the next book will be better. I think the basis is good let’s see if the execution come through.
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- Katilicus
- 06-23-21
Funny, but Predictable
So here’s the deal: this is a cute story. There’s some humor, and some great one liners. The main character has some relatable mishaps, and definitely thinks she has a boob problem.
But while she’s funny, there’s almost zero character development. For anyone.
The hero is just an alpha male that isn’t very alpha. A bad guy that isn’t a bad guy. He’s just…a guy that is pretty close to perfect.
The heroine is predictably flawed - beautiful but doesn’t realize it, insecure, limited sexual experience and has a series of mishaps that have to do with her being humorous and/or kind of an oddball.
Together, I didn’t feel the chemistry. While it’s a sweet get together, I didn’t feel the turmoil of the buildup. It’s like you always knew they were getting together, and the H was just…there to be the romance element. That’s it.
If you are looking for a vampiric tale that doesn’t take itself seriously, is an easy read and has some great moments of humor - this is for you. It’s along the lines of Molly Harper’s Good Girls Don’t Have Fangs which fits a specific mood. Just take it for what it is.
As for the performance - it was okay. It was well edited, and I didn’t find any errors. That said, I’m just not crazy about the actress. Her men all sound very similar, and I just felt like the heroine was very monotone. But when it comes to the main components: editing, errors, etc. it his the mark.
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- Suzan
- 10-20-22
great book
I highly recommend this book looking forward to the hearing the next book. narrator does a great job. I highly recommend!
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- rachel pohler
- 12-07-20
Funny and exciting
This was a great book! What's not to love about a Vampire Romantic Comedy? I enjoyed this story very much. Great ending, wish it were longer :)
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- Amazon Customer
- 07-14-23
Just ok
I wanted to like it but it’s just an ok read. The female lead is annoying and it’s hard to get past. The narrator was not a good pick for it.
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- S.J.O.
- 05-05-21
Don't waste the credit
I really wanted to like this book but the main character is awful. Dani just made me want to smack some sense into her over mad over. I agree with other reviews that she is a total brat. It was a hard book to get through. The narrator was fine but not the best I have heard. Overall, I would skip this one.
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- blue_river @AudiobookObsession
- 12-14-20
Life Sucks After You Die
Although Danni does seem to be a bit of a brat and have major self esteem issues, she grew on me as the story progressed. Ryder is such a patient character that is willing to go the distance to keep Danni safe from all her enemies that she gained overnight. I enjoyed listening to this book and with the way it ended, you could stop there, but I will be getting the next when it comes out.
I was give a copy in exchange for an honest review.
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- Ms.V
- 10-22-21
Awesome
Absolutely love this narrator and story collectively. Just wish the rest was available in audible because I can't go without hearing this vs reading lol
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