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My Three-Year-Old Is a Barbarian and Other Parenting Problems
- Misfits of Carnt, Book 1
- Narrated by: Rebecca Woods
- Length: 8 hrs
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Publisher's summary
Necromantic rituals, murderous ogres, battle-scarred rangers: not a typical Saturday detention for unsuspecting teaching assistant Petra and her delinquent teen charges.
The Beaverton High School Breakfast Club show up for what they thought would be cleaning the locker room with a toothbrush when the morning goes horribly wrong, and they fall victim to a deadly, dark spell.
Some jerkwad moon mage shoves the consciousness of Petra's three-year-old into the body of a musclebound barbarian, and she is transformed into a halfling. The kids get stuck as a cleric, fire mage, and other stalwarts of your typical fantasy gaming party.
Now they must quest through a land of pissed-off warriors, angry giants, a pompous vampire, and a necromancer out to kill Petra and her child.
Despite being in a world where everything threatens to shuffle off her mortal coil, the hardest part is convincing a hulked-out man that the battle axe is not a toy, the undead are not cuddly, and he should use the potty.
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Ashley Perrin is fresh out of college and starting a job as a community liaison for the Third District–the city’s only sector with more alien residents than humans. Ashley’s barely found where the paper clips are kept when she’s beset with constituent complaints–from too much noise at the Annual Lupidian Celebration Parade to a trip-and-fall chicken to a very particular type of alien hornet that threatens the very city itself. And if that’s not terrifying enough, Ashley is next up at the office karaoke night.
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What a silly and sweet quick listen!
- By Geoffrey Christian on 10-08-24
By: John Scalzi
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Temporal
- By: Julian Simpson, Richard MacLean Smith, Bec Boey, and others
- Narrated by: Nicola Walker, Sanjeev Bhaskar, Jessie Mei Li, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 26 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall
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Performance
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In the not-too-distant future, a 21-member crew launches from Earth. Their mission: to establish a temporary colony on Mars. Little do they know that colony will become permanent–and the last stand of the human race. Because, without warning, every single person left on Earth simply...vanishes. Now, a thousand years later, the resources needed to sustain life are running out, and the very existence of the Mars colony is threatened. Humankind has only one option–to return to its home planet.
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It was ok.
- By Cregg Terasa on 08-06-24
By: Julian Simpson, and others
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What listeners say about My Three-Year-Old Is a Barbarian and Other Parenting Problems
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Shay
- 02-17-24
Fun-tasy
A funny book made even funnier by a fantastic audiobook narrator. She does great accents and gives a distinct personality to each of the characters. You can tell how much fun she had with the narration.
The book follows a distinct cast of characters you aren’t going to find anywhere else. A three year old trapped in an adult barbarian king’s body. An evil necromancer king who is embarrassed by his proud mama who just wants to cheer him on. A girl who uses photographic evidence of a magical realm to become an Instagram influencer. It’s a cool genre blend about average modern day people who find themselves body swapped and realm swapped with a gang of fantasy heroes. It’s fun watching all the different characters and pieces come together around the plot in a cohesive way.
The book doesn’t take itself too seriously either, and that makes space for plenty of jokes and references to slip in when you least expect it. The author does a great job subverting expectations and getting a laugh out of you over all the little details.
This book is just fun. If you like fantasy and comedy, this is the book to read/listen to.
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- Athena (OneReadingNurse)
- 02-09-24
hilarious story
This is so much fun and the narrator is absolutely amazing. I am not a fan of kids and she did a great job bringing out how annoying they are, plus a ton of other accents and fun things.
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