Outofshapeworthlessloser
A Memoir of Figure Skating, F*cking Up, and Figuring It Out
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Narrated by:
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Gracie Gold
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By:
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Gracie Gold
About this listen
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A “piercing account” (The Wall Street Journal) of surviving as a young woman in a society that rewards appearances more than anything and demands perfection at all costs—especially if you’re an Olympic figure skater.
“A riveting memoir, which details her experience with an eating disorder, depression and her high-stakes career.”—People (Best Books to Read in February 2024)
When Gracie Gold stepped onto center stage (or ice, rather) as America’s sweetheart at the 2014 Sochi Olympics, she instantly became the face of America’s most beloved winter sport. Beautiful, blonde, Midwestern, and media-trained, she was suddenly being written up everywhere from The New Yorker to Teen Vogue to People and baking cookies with Taylor Swift.
But little did the public know what Gold was facing when the cameras were off, driven by the self-destructive voice inside that she calls “outofshapeworthlessloser.” In 2017, she entered treatment for what was publicly announced as an eating disorder and anxiety treatment but was, in reality, suicidal ideation. While Gold’s public star was rising, her private life was falling apart: Cracks within her family were widening, her bulimia was getting worse, and she became a survivor of sexual assault. The pressure of training for years with demanding coaches and growing up in a household that accepted nothing less than gold had finally taken its toll.
Now Gold reveals the exclusive and harrowing story of her struggles in and out of the pressure-packed world of elite figure skating: the battles with her family, her coaches, the powers-that-be at her federation, and her deteriorating mental health.
Outofshapeworthlessloser is not only a forceful reckoning from a world-class athlete but also an intimate memoir, told with unflinching honesty and stirring defiance.
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On My Feet All Day
- By bannedbum on 08-21-21
By: Derick Lugo
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Wildlife Wars
- The Life and Times of a Fish and Game Warden
- By: Terry Grosz
- Narrated by: Pete Simonelli
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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In Wildlife Wars, Terry Grosz serves up fascinating stories - alternately hair-raising, hilarious, and heart-wrenching - from his 30-year struggle to protect wildlife in America. A natural storyteller, Grosz writes about the remarkable characters he met - on both sides of the law - as he matched wits with elk poachers, salmon snaggers, commercial-market duck hunters, and a host of other law-breakers. Best of all, though, these stories are so remarkably entertaining you won't want to put them down.
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Title should be: "reckless egomaniac tells lies"
- By ross on 03-01-17
By: Terry Grosz
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Playing to Win
- By: Michael Lewis
- Narrated by: Michael Lewis
- Length: 2 hrs and 13 mins
- Original Recording
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All over America, families are investing blood, sweat, tears, and retirement savings in their children’s sports careers, all with the ultimate goal of…what exactly? A college scholarship? A professional contract? Simply the taste of victory? Through the lens of the highly competitive world of girls’ softball, Lewis reveals the youth sports industrial complex that has arisen to aggressively monetize after-school pastimes.
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Great Listen
- By Brian Bray on 10-15-20
By: Michael Lewis
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The Best Hunting Stories Ever Told
- By: Jay Cassell - editor
- Narrated by: Jason Culp
- Length: 32 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Follow the trails of hunters - the original storytellers - as they interpret signs, examine tracks, and chase and catch their prey (or fail to). Listeners can curl up with the best authentic hunting fiction and non-fiction, bringing the great Mount Kenya and the prairies of the American Bison into your living room. From Theodore Roosevelt and Gene Hill to Rick Bass and Charles Dickens, remember classic hunting tales and discover new stories of hunters’ luck, camaraderie, and use of smarts on the trail.
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A broad collection of hunting tales
- By Elaine on 06-21-15
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Buried in the Sky
- The Extraordinary Story of the Sherpa Climbers on K2's Deadliest Day
- By: Peter Zuckerman, Amanda Padoan
- Narrated by: David Doersch
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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When Edmund Hillary first conquered Mt. Everest, Sherpa Tenzing Norgay was at his side. Indeed, for as long as Westerners have been climbing the Himalaya, Sherpas have been the unsung heroes in the background. In August 2008, when eleven climbers lost their lives on K2, the world’s most dangerous peak, two Sherpas survived. They had emerged from poverty and political turmoil to become two of the most skillful mountaineers on earth. Based on unprecedented access and interviews, Buried in the Sky reveals their astonishing story for the first time.
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Sherpas, The True Unsung Heroes
- By Kathy in CA on 07-26-15
By: Peter Zuckerman, and others
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Thinner Leaner Stronger
- The Simple Science of Building the Ultimate Female Body
- By: Michael Matthews
- Narrated by: Elliott Denkers
- Length: 13 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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You can get that beautiful “beach-ready” body without following a bland, boring, bodybuilding diet and without doing exhausting strength training workouts you hate. And this exercise book shows you how.
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"The Ultimate Female Body", but uses male examples
- By bookWorm on 06-29-15
By: Michael Matthews
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The Spartan Way
- Eat Better. Train Better. Think Better. Be Better.
- By: Joe De Sena, Jeff Csatari
- Narrated by: Christian Rummel
- Length: 4 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Joe De Sena has one ultimate goal: to help improve everyone’s physical and emotional health by teaching them the tenets of Spartan living from ancient Greece: simple eating, smart training, mastering resilience, and an all-out commitment to achieving a goal.
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Don’t know what to think...
- By bakaDOH! on 07-20-19
By: Joe De Sena, and others
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Stay Sane in an Insane World
- How to Control the Controllables and Thrive
- By: Greg Harden
- Narrated by: Greg Harden
- Length: 5 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Champions aren’t born. They’re built. Greg Harden spent over 30 years building them at the University of Michigan, including 400 future professional athletes, 50 NFL first-round draft picks, and 120 Olympians from over 20 countries. He gained national recognition when 60 Minutes Sports profiled him as “Michigan’s Secret Weapon.” Now, in his first book, Greg Harden is reaching out to help anyone who wants to live their best life by offering powerful and practical advice.
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Good book, However, prejudice shows through a bit
- By Don Dotson on 08-22-23
By: Greg Harden
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Pickleball Mindset
- The Blueprint for Peak Performance
- By: Dayne Gingrich, Jill Martin
- Narrated by: Dayne Gingrich, Jill Martin
- Length: 4 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Not just another book about how to play pickleball, Pickleball Mindset dives deep into how to think on the court. Coauthored by Dayne Gingrich, top senior professional pickleball player and renowned mental performance coach, and Jill Martin, an attorney turned personal trainer and pickleball fanatic, this book follows their year-long coaching relationship in which Jill seeks to become mentally dominant on and off the court.
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Build The Confidence To Thrive in Pickleball
- By K. Ford on 11-16-24
By: Dayne Gingrich, and others
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Ball Four
- The Final Pitch
- By: Jim Bouton
- Narrated by: Jim Bouton
- Length: 18 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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When Ball Four was published in 1970, it created a firestorm. Bouton was called a Judas, a Benedict Arnold and a “social leper” for having violated the “sanctity of the clubhouse.” Baseball commissioner Bowie Kuhn tried to force Bouton to sign a statement saying the book wasn’t true. Ballplayers, most of whom hadn’t read it, denounced the book. It was even banned by a few libraries. Almost everyone else, however, loved Ball Four.
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Three Ten Year Updates Give Bouton a 5th Star
- By Byron on 08-09-12
By: Jim Bouton
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A Damn Near Perfect Game
- Reclaiming America's Pastime
- By: Joe Kelly, Rob Bradford - contributor
- Narrated by: L.J. Ganser
- Length: 6 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Baseball’s most outspoken fireballer brings the high heat—calling out the hacks, cheats, and ridiculous rules that have tarnished the game—and pitches A-plus stuff on how to make baseball pure, fun, and damn near perfect.
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Could use a better narrator
- By Jason Monroe on 12-07-23
By: Joe Kelly, and others
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Twisted
- The Story of Larry Nassar and the Women Who Took Him Down
- By: Mary Pilon, Carla Correa
- Narrated by: Mary Pilon, Carla Correa
- Length: 5 hrs and 17 mins
- Original Recording
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In early 2018, Larry Nassar, the former doctor for USA Gymnastics and Michigan State University, was sentenced to serve out the rest of his life in prison after pleading guilty to a variety of sex crimes. New York Times best-selling author Mary Pilon and Carla Correa chronicle the scandal from its inception, tracking the institutions that Nassar hid behind, the athletic culture that he benefited from, and the women who eventually brought him to justice.
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The Truth as told by the Survivors
- By DKMarkham on 07-27-19
By: Mary Pilon, and others
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The Girls is a profound exploration of trust, ambition, betrayal, and self-discovery. Award-winning journalist Abigail Pesta unveils this deeply reported narrative at a time when the nation is wrestling with the implications of the MeToo movement. How do the women who grew up with Nassar reconcile the monster in the news with the man they once trusted? In The Girls, we learn that their answers to that wrenching question are as rich, insightful, and varied as the human experience itself.
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Don’t waste a credit
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All Jackie Goldschneider ever wanted was to be thin. As a child, she’d stand in front of the mirror, sucking in her stomach and arching her back to feel her ribs, praying to see a model-like figure looking back. As an obese teen, lonely and tormented by her weight, her doctor encouraged her to start dieting, ultimately leading to a prolonged battle with anorexia that nearly took her life. After decades of hiding her eating disorder from friends, family, and the world, Jackie is ready to expose the realities of her devastating struggle.
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The author's resilience.
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Seventeen-year-old Elena is vanishing. Every day means renewed determination, so every day means fewer calories. This is the story of a girl whose armor against anxiety becomes artillery against herself as she battles on both sides of a lose-lose war in a struggle with anorexia.
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The Girls is a profound exploration of trust, ambition, betrayal, and self-discovery. Award-winning journalist Abigail Pesta unveils this deeply reported narrative at a time when the nation is wrestling with the implications of the MeToo movement. How do the women who grew up with Nassar reconcile the monster in the news with the man they once trusted? In The Girls, we learn that their answers to that wrenching question are as rich, insightful, and varied as the human experience itself.
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Loved it!
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memoir of a brief career as a top model - and a brutally honest account of what goes on behind the scenes in a fascinating closed industry. Scouted in the street when she was 17, Victoire Dauxerre's story started like a teenager's dream: within months she was on the catwalks of New York's major fashion shows and part of the most select circle of in-demand supermodels in the world.
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Self-indulgent twaddle
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Little Girls in Pretty Boxes
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Holds up 20 years later
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Loved the audible!! Great narration
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Hungry for Life
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In this painfully moving memoir, take a firsthand look at anorexia through the eyes of a young girl. Even in kindergarten, Rachel Richards knows something isn't right. By leading us through her distorted thoughts, she shines a light on the experience and mystery of mental illness. As she grows up, unable to comprehend or communicate her inner trauma, Rachel lashes out, hurting herself, running away from home, and fighting her family. Restricting food gives her the control she craves. But after being hospitalized and force-fed, Rachel only retreats further into herself.
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A Gripping Account of Anorexia and Recovery
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What Is a Girl Worth?
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Rachael Denhollander's voice was heard around the world when she spoke out to end the most shocking scandal in US gymnastics history. The first victim to publicly accuse Larry Nassar, the former USA Gymnastics team doctor who abused hundreds of young athletes, Rachael now reveals her full story for the first time. How did Nassar get away with it for so long? How did Rachael and the other survivors finally stop him and bring him to justice? And how can we protect the vulnerable in our own families, churches, and communities?
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Reads like a crime novel... but it’s real.
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Paperweight
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Seventeen-year-old Stevie is trapped. In her life. And now in an eating-disorder treatment center on the dusty outskirts of the New Mexico desert. Life in the center is regimented and intrusive, a nightmare come true. Nurses and therapists watch Stevie at mealtime, accompany her to the bathroom, and challenge her to eat the foods she's worked so hard to avoid.
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The Fake Southern Accent? Yeeeeesh!
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Winning Balance
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Twenty-year-old American gymnast Shawn Johnson is a four-time Olympic gold and silver medalist; a national- and world-champion athlete. Already a popular role model to all ages, in 2009 she captured the national spotlight again when she won on the widely popular Dancing with the Stars. Yet Shawn is no stranger to hard work and adversity.
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LOVED HER STORY!
- By Anonymous User on 12-04-19
By: Shawn Johnson, and others
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Dying to Be Thin
- The True Story of My Lifelong Battle Against Anorexia
- By: Nikki Grahame
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- Unabridged
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"The figure looking back at me was little more than a skeleton with just a thin layer of tissue paper for skin, drawn over the stick-like bones. I stood staring for a good couple of minutes, considering what I'd become. And my verdict? Brilliant, I thought. It's been worth every moment of all that hard work". Say the name Nikki Grahame and most people will remember the bubbly, highly strung and hugely entertaining Big Brother 7 contestant.
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Not What You Might Think
- By ro_runner on 11-07-15
By: Nikki Grahame
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Wasted
- A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia
- By: Marya Hornbacher
- Narrated by: Marya Hornbacher
- Length: 5 hrs and 25 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Precociously intelligent, imaginative, energetic, and ambitious, Marya Hornbacher grew up in a comfortable middle-class American home. At the age of 5, she returned home from ballet class one day, put on an enormous sweater, curled up on her bed, and cried because she thought she was fat. By age 9, she was secretly bulimic, throwing up at home after school, while watching Brady Bunch reruns on television and munching Fritos. She added anorexia to her repertoire a few years later and took great pride in her ability to starve. Marya's story gathers intensity with each passing year. By the time she is in college and working for a wire news service in Washington D.C., she is in the grip of a bout of anorexia so horrifying that it will forever put to rest the romance of wasting away. Down to 52 pounds and counting, Marya becomes a battlefield: her powerful death instinct at war with the will to live. Why would a talented young girl go through the looking glass and slip into a netherworld where up is down, food is greed, and death is honor? Why enter into a love affair with hunger, drugs, sex, and death? Marya Hornbacher sustained both anorexia and bulimia through 5 lengthy hospitalizations, endless therapy, the loss of family, friends, jobs, and ultimately, any sense of what it means to be "normal." In this vivid, emotionally wrenching memoir, she recreates the experience and illuminates the tangle of personal, family, and cultural causes underlying eating disorders.
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Abridged=Horrible
- By Kelly on 05-05-13
By: Marya Hornbacher
What listeners say about Outofshapeworthlessloser
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- Eliza
- 02-08-24
Real, Raw, Honest, and Beautiful
The title of my review should speak for itself. Thank you Grace for the opportunity to get to know you and your beautiful journey in this world.
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- Anonymous User
- 02-14-24
Raw honesty
Really no words to describe the gift that GG has given the world. Thank you ❤️
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- Michael
- 02-11-24
A beautiful and brave story!
Moving and inspiring. A very candid and important story. I loved it. Definitely a must for skating fans but anyone would enjoy hearing about this tale of authenticity and loving yourself regardless of yourself.
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- Diana Roderick
- 02-13-24
The truthfulness and heart to tell her story.
Loved this memoir. It’s very important for people struggling with mental health. No matter what the sport or life situation.
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- Lauren
- 02-18-24
Best book I read all year
Thank goodness for this honesty. In a world of fake everything, this is exactly what I needed. I literally couldn’t stop reading it. Gave me lots of hope for our future.
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- Sweeti2056
- 02-17-24
Striking and honest
Thank you for sharing your story! I could relate to much of your story. I laughed and cried.
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- Joe Siegel
- 02-10-24
wow
deep, dark, and refreshingly honest dive into not only the culture of figure skating but also mental health. truly a good listen
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- julia colello
- 02-15-24
Honest and beautifully written
I grew up figure skating and Gracie Gold was my favorite skater to watch. This book was so open an honest not just about her experiences, but about the experiences we all face in the world of ice skating. So my of my lived experiences that I could never put into words, suddenly have a voice. Thank you for writing this amazing book Gracie, and keep doing the great you do on speaking out about mental health in sports and specifically skating.
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- jodiod
- 03-15-24
Extraordinary
Truly great memoir and narration. I’m a 60 yr old ex skater who went thru the mind game and eating disorder as well. Things are the same. The world has changed but not enough. But the act of skating is magical. Thank you Gracie. PS. I saw you at all the Nationals in San Jose.
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- JGomez
- 03-17-24
Favorite Memoir I’ve read!
I’m so proud of Gracie Gold for telling the world her story. I love and appreciate her so much more now. This is an amazing and honest memoir that fans of skating and beyond would benefit greatly from and enjoy.
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