Sex, God, and the Conservative Church
Erasing Shame from Sexual Intimacy
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Narrated by:
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Tina Schermer Sellers
About this listen
As a psychotherapist and professor of marriage and family therapy and sexuality at a Christian University, Tina Schermer Sellers, PhD, has spent a career listening deeply to the often untold, most tightly held, shame-filled stories of people’s lives. Over the last 30 years in particular, these stories have revealed the devastating effects of abstinence education, the purity movement of the evangelical church, and the simultaneous removal of media regulations that allowed for an influx of sexual violence against women to enter all forms of commercial media beginning in the 1980s. This destructive tidal wave of events became our de-facto sex educator, and a sexually shamed saturated rape culture to become the result.
In this fascinating account, Dr. Sellers examines the history that brought America here, and the role the empire Christian church and capitalism have played as socio-political bedfellows. Evidence is presented to show how power and control was chosen over sexual health and wellness; and body suspicion and misogyny chosen over sacred sexuality and worthiness. In this investigation, Dr. Sellers reveals several beautiful mystic Hebrew stories demonstrating a relentless God who developed sexuality and bodies on purpose to give humans one of the most powerful and passionate experiences of love - but how these potent ancient narratives were buried out of view.
We find in this book written for clinicians and the public, that sexuality is meant to bless us, that we can heal sexual shame, find God in and through intimate touch, and that nothing can separate us from God’s love. We are radically valuable and radically imperfect - and always worthy of love.
©2015, 2016, 2020 Tina Schermer Sellers (P)2018 Tina Schermer SellersListeners also enjoyed...
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SO Hard To Listen To!
- By froglover on 12-03-16
By: Arielle Ford
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On Our Best Behavior
- The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good
- By: Elise Loehnen
- Narrated by: Elise Loehnen
- Length: 11 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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We congratulate ourselves when we resist the donut in the office breakroom. We celebrate our restraint when we hold back from sending an email in anger. We feel virtuous when we wake up at dawn to get a jump on the day. We put others’ needs ahead of our own and believe this makes us exemplary. In On Our Best Behavior, journalist Elise Loehnen explains that these impulses—often lauded as unselfish, distinctly feminine instincts—are actually ingrained in us by a culture that reaps the benefits, via an extraordinarily effective collection of mores known as the Seven Deadly Sins.
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Autobiography in Disguise
- By Lindsey on 06-11-23
By: Elise Loehnen
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9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage
- And the Truths That Will Save It and Set It Free
- By: Greg Smalley, Robert S. Paul
- Narrated by: Lyle Blaker
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Lies about marriage are rampant in our culture and the church. They’re killing marriages. But the corresponding truths can strengthen marriages and even save the most troubled relationships. In this audiobook, marriage experts Greg Smalley and Robert Paul identify the lies, explain how they work to destroy marriages, and reveal the truths that not only can improve marriages, but rescue those that are floundering.
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Not new, contradictory and biblically inaccurate
- By thor on 04-07-21
By: Greg Smalley, and others
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The Second Mountain
- How People Move from the Prison of Self to the Joy of Commitment
- By: David Brooks
- Narrated by: Arthur Morey
- Length: 12 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Author David Brooks explores the four commitments that define a life of meaning and purpose: to a spouse and family, to a vocation, to a philosophy or faith, and to a community. Our personal fulfillment depends on how well we choose and execute these commitments. Brooks looks at a range of people who have lived joyous, committed lives, and who have embraced the necessity and beauty of dependence. He gathers their wisdom on how to choose a partner, how to pick a vocation, how to live out a philosophy, and how we can begin to integrate our commitments into one overriding purpose.
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Pursue meaning, reject hyper-individualism
- By Adam Shields on 05-07-19
By: David Brooks
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How to Love Yourself (and Sometimes Other People)
- Spiritual Advice for Modern Relationships
- By: Lodro Rinzler, Meggan Watterson
- Narrated by: Lodro Rinzler, Meggan Watterson
- Length: 5 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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How to Love Yourself (and Sometimes Other People) is a smart, hip guide for spiritual seekers who want to experience more love and stability in all forms of relationships. Told from the unique vantage points of authors Meggan Watterson and Lodro Rinzler, this book explores staying anchored in the foundation of self-love as you navigate the natural (and often stormy) cycle of a relationship. Their dual perspectives as teachers and scholars of Christian mysticism and Buddhism make for a rich and fascinating dialogue that covers everything from sex to breakups.
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Felt shallow and not quite on-topic
- By barefoot rabbit on 09-03-20
By: Lodro Rinzler, and others
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Rethinking Sexuality
- God’s Design and Why It Matters
- By: Dr. Juli Slattery, Gary Thomas - Foreword by
- Narrated by: Dr. Juli Slattery
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Sexual abuse, sex addiction, gender confusion, brokenness, and shame plague today's world, and people are seeking clarity and hope. By contesting long-held cultural paradigms, this book equips you to see how sexuality is rooted in the broader context of God's heart and his work for us on earth. Instead of arguing with the world about what's right and wrong about sexual choices, this practical resource equips you to share the love and grace of Jesus as you encounter the pain of sexual brokenness - your own or someone else's.
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Raw, Real, & Honest
- By Bianca on 05-02-19
By: Dr. Juli Slattery, and others
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If the Buddha Married
- Creating Enduring Relationships on a Spiritual Path
- By: Charlotte Kasl
- Narrated by: Renée Raudman
- Length: 7 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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If the Buddha Married is filled with the same highly practical, spiritually sound guidance that so clearly touched a chord with fans of If the Buddha Dated. Charlotte Kasl is renowned for her ability to speak with depth, wisdom, and humor on important matters of the heart. In If the Buddha Married, Kasl inspires us to create fulfilling and vibrant relationships through a commitment to awareness and truth.
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It's not about "PERFORMANCE".
- By chuck on 03-19-12
By: Charlotte Kasl
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Men's Work
- A Practical Guide to Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, and Find Freedom
- By: Connor Beaton
- Narrated by: Connor Beaton
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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In Men’s Work, ManTalks founder Connor Beaton offers the tactical, self-led guide men have been looking for. Here, he destigmatizes inner work by reframing it as a kind of psychological warrior training that many men can relate to and have been craving. Beaton walks you through a framework for facing the hidden and rejected aspects of yourself—factors that lead to self-sabotage, anxiety, and depression.
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From a woman’s perspective
- By NBB on 03-21-23
By: Connor Beaton
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Emotionally Healthy Spirituality
- It's Impossible to Be Spiritually Mature, While Remaining Emotionally Immature
- By: Peter Scazzero
- Narrated by: Peter Scazzero
- Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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In this revised best-selling book, Peter Scazzero outlines a road map for discipleship with Jesus that is powerfully transformative. He unveils what's wrong with our current definition of "spiritual growth" and offers not only a model of spirituality that actually works, but seven steps to change that will help you experience authentic faith and hunger for God.
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Very thoughtful book
- By Anonymous User on 01-28-22
By: Peter Scazzero
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How to Be an Adult in Relationships
- The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
- By: David Richo
- Narrated by: David Richo
- Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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"Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this audiobook, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships - one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life.
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Missing text
- By Annah Nimouse on 07-26-19
By: David Richo
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A Religion of One's Own
- A Guide to Creating a Personal Spirituality in a Secular World
- By: Thomas Moore
- Narrated by: Donald Corren
- Length: 9 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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The New York Times best-selling author and trusted spiritual adviser offers a follow up to his classic Care of the Soul. Something essential is missing from modern life. Many who've turned away from religious institutions - and others who have lived wholly without religion - hunger for more than what contemporary secular life has to offer but are reluctant to follow organized religion's strict and often inflexible path to spirituality. In A Religion of One' s Own, best-selling author and former monk Thomas Moore explores the myriad possibilities of creating a personal spiritual style, either inside or outside formal religion.
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Powerful and Inspiring
- By Amazon Customer on 05-25-16
By: Thomas Moore
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The Energies of Love
- Using Energy Medicine to Keep Your Relationship Thriving
- By: Donna Eden, David Feinstein
- Narrated by: Melissa Hurst
- Length: 16 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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In this groundbreaking audiobook, Donna Eden and David Feinstein (authors of Energy Medicine and Energy Medicine for Women) draw on the real-life experiences of couples who have attended their popular "Energies of Love" workshops, as well as their own relationship as husband and wife, to show how an understanding of your energy system and that of your partner can help you build a more harmonious and loving bond.
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If Only
- By Brenda on 07-14-15
By: Donna Eden, and others
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Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts
- Seven Questions to Ask Before - and After - You Marry
- By: Les Parrott, Leslie Parrott
- Narrated by: Les Parrott, Leslie Parrott
- Length: 4 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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More than a million couples can't be wrong! And with this updated edition of their award-winning book, Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott help you launch lifelong love like never before. This is more than an audiobook - it's an experience. Get ready for deeper intimacy with the best friend you'll ever have. Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, in more than 15 languages, is the most widely used marriage prep tool in the world.
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basically just a long advertisement
- By J. Sullivan on 07-06-16
By: Les Parrott, and others
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What listeners say about Sex, God, and the Conservative Church
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Hello there.
- 03-21-23
Read this if you have ever wondered if you are alo
This book has been incredibly helpful to me.
I needed this book years ago. I have always struggled with my sexuality as young as nine I am 28 now and I have never viewed sex in such an amazing way. there is such beauty here! I dealt with shame most of my young life and this book referred to me by a dear friend has helped me immensely. this book is definitely worth listening to and I would recommend listening to it while you're out and about but also take the time to come back and take notes later on!
Thank you so much Tina!
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- Em_RU
- 07-16-22
Great content
Great content. Solid practices for reclaiming one’s body from sexual shame and improving intimacy. The only problem is the quality of the audio, especially at the beginning and end of some chapters.
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- Angie A
- 12-17-22
Thought provoking
I did not quite know what to expect, but as I got to listening, I realized that I needed this book. I grew up in purity culture and I was able to work through many issues talked about in the book as well as reframe my view on sex. If you are coming out of or are still in the conservative Christian church I would highly recommend this book!
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- Landon S
- 09-09-23
Necessary reading
The beginning lays a foundation for why this book is needed. Then they talk about church history which was interesting (yet boring for me) than the 1990s (which was sociologically interesting for me). The middle of the book would help serve parents well with how to talk to their kids about healthy sexuality. The last portion of the book is written to therapists on how to help couples with their sex lives and my thought has been to tell clients to read it, make notes, and then practice.
This book is a shining light for the Christian trying to experience healthy sexuality and how to teach their children how to develop a healthy sexuality.
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- Anonymous User
- 04-11-22
Great insight without condescension
Good advice in general and explains a lot of headtrash that comes from our early years. Still looking for a book that helps with men's trauma, but this is a good start.
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- Amazon Customer
- 03-01-23
I wish more people knew about this!!
I definitely needed this book! After growing up with abstinence-only sex ed and a huge emphasis on purity in the Catholic church, this book was incredibly helpful with allowing me to view sex is a healthy way without having to sacrifice religion. Will definitely be sharing this!!
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- Amazon Customer
- 10-11-21
Awful audio quality, great content
This is a great book and I definitely recommend it. The main problem is the recording sounds very amateur and low quality like it was just done in the narrator’s spare bedroom in their home with thin walls or something. It was pretty distracting but still worth listening to.
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- JKT
- 09-01-22
A must read!
Every person who has grown up in a purity culture, conservative background with abstinence only education, needs to read this book! Every mental health professional doing therapy needs to read this! Outstanding!
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- Ron Moore
- 04-02-22
Such an important book!
This book is so healing and helpful for anyone who has grown up in or around the church. The recoding is more casual which I prefer because it really sounds like someone is reading to you.
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- Bethany Biggers
- 10-17-22
I loved this book!
I love how the author provides real life information from sessions and narratives and connects the research with theological frameworks.
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