Come As You Are: Revised and Updated
The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life
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Narrated by:
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Emily Nagoski
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Nicholas Boulton
About this listen
A revised and updated edition of Emily Nagoski’s game-changing New York Times best seller Come As You Are, featuring new information and research on mindfulness, desire, and pleasure that will radically transform your sex life.
For much of the 20th and 21st centuries, women’s sexuality was an uncharted territory in science, studied far less frequently - and far less seriously - than its male counterpart.
That is, until Emily Nagoski’s Come As You Are, which used groundbreaking science and research to prove that the most important factor in creating and sustaining a sex life filled with confidence and joy is not what the parts are or how they’re organized but how you feel about them. In the years since the book’s initial publication, countless women have learned through Nagoski’s accessible and informative guide that things like stress, mood, trust, and body image are not peripheral factors in a woman’s sexual well-being; they are central to it - and that even if you don’t always feel like it, you are already sexually whole by just being yourself. This revised and updated edition continues that mission with new information and advanced research, demystifying and decoding the science of sex so that everyone can create a better sex life and discover more pleasure than you ever thought possible.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2015, 2021 Emily Nagoski, Ph.D. All rights reserved. (P)2021 Simon & Schuster, Inc. All rights reserved.Listeners also enjoyed...
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- By Derek G. on 01-13-17
By: John Bradshaw
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Love and Limerence
- The Experience of Being in Love
- By: Dorothy Tennov
- Narrated by: Tanya Eby
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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First released more than 40 years ago, Love and Limerence has become a classic in the psychology of emotion. As relevent today as it was then, this book offers insight into love, infatuation, madness, and all flavors of emotion in between.
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rundown of surveys and stats
- By supermichelle on 12-28-22
By: Dorothy Tennov
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The Energies of Love
- Using Energy Medicine to Keep Your Relationship Thriving
- By: Donna Eden, David Feinstein
- Narrated by: Melissa Hurst
- Length: 16 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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In this groundbreaking audiobook, Donna Eden and David Feinstein (authors of Energy Medicine and Energy Medicine for Women) draw on the real-life experiences of couples who have attended their popular "Energies of Love" workshops, as well as their own relationship as husband and wife, to show how an understanding of your energy system and that of your partner can help you build a more harmonious and loving bond.
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If Only
- By Brenda on 07-14-15
By: Donna Eden, and others
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Curious?
- By: Todd Kashdan
- Narrated by: Todd Kashdan
- Length: 6 hrs and 4 mins
- Abridged
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Dead cats. That's the image many people conjure up when you mention curiosity. An image perpetuated by a dusty old proverb that has long represented the extent of our understanding of the term. This book might not put the proverb to rest, but it will flip it upside down: far from killing anything, curiosity breathes new life into almost everything it touches.
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Transformative & Engaging
- By Hans on 04-29-09
By: Todd Kashdan
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Fierce Self-Compassion
- How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive
- By: Kristin Neff
- Narrated by: Jean Ann Douglass
- Length: 12 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compassion. Now, 10 years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Although kindness and self-acceptance allow us to be with ourselves as we are, in all our glorious imperfection, the desire to alleviate suffering at the heart of this mindset isn't always gentle, sometimes it's fierce.
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Liberal Activism distracting
- By Janiene on 07-26-21
By: Kristin Neff
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The Emotional Edge
- Discover Your Inner Age, Ignite Your Hidden Strengths, and Reroute Misdirected Fear to Live Your Fullest
- By: Crystal Andrus Morissette
- Narrated by: Andi Arndt
- Length: 9 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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The Emotional Edge is an exciting expansion of Crystal's successful brand - she has tackled weight management, confidence building, and spiritual growth; now she combines all that and more into her most powerful program yet. The Emotional Edge is a guide for letting go of the past and embracing a more empowered future. This audiobook is spiritual self-help designed to teach listeners how to overcome behavioral ruts and engage the world from a happier, more empowered place.
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the world needs more of this.
- By Amber Jessop on 11-25-17
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Men Chase, Women Choose
- The Neuroscience of Meeting, Dating, Losing Your Mind, and Finding True Love
- By: Dawn Maslar
- Narrated by: Suzanne Elise Freeman
- Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Men Chase, Women Choose is the first book to offer cutting-edge research that explains how the brain works when two people first meet, start to date, fall in love, and then move into real long-term love. Maslar's unique approach brings together the latest and most relevant neurological, physiological, and biochemical research on the science of love while incorporating stories and examples of composite characters based on participants of her popular classes and seminars.
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Disappointed
- By Kittenheels on 11-18-18
By: Dawn Maslar
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Pussy
- By: Regena Thomashauer
- Narrated by: Regena Thomashauer
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Get ready to encounter a book that will change your experience as a woman in a powerful new way. Author, educator, and School of Womanly Arts founder Regena Thomashauer has been working with women for the past 25 years, and what began as just a few women in her living room has since grown into a global movement with thousands of graduates worldwide.
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Hippy Trippy Dilight
- By Steff Doles on 04-27-17
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The Men on My Couch
- True Stories of Sex, Love, and Psychotherapy
- By: Brandy Engler, David Rensin
- Narrated by: Abby Craden
- Length: 8 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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When Dr. Brandy Engler opened her sex therapy practice for women in Manhattan, she got a big surprise. Most of the calls were from men. They wanted to talk about womanizing, porn addiction, impotence, prostitutes - and most of all, love.
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Not what you'd expect
- By J Lee on 03-26-13
By: Brandy Engler, and others
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Men's Work
- A Practical Guide to Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, and Find Freedom
- By: Connor Beaton
- Narrated by: Connor Beaton
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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In Men’s Work, ManTalks founder Connor Beaton offers the tactical, self-led guide men have been looking for. Here, he destigmatizes inner work by reframing it as a kind of psychological warrior training that many men can relate to and have been craving. Beaton walks you through a framework for facing the hidden and rejected aspects of yourself—factors that lead to self-sabotage, anxiety, and depression.
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From a woman’s perspective
- By NBB on 03-21-23
By: Connor Beaton
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Love Understood
- The Science of Who, How and Why We Love
- By: Laura Mucha
- Narrated by: Laura Mucha
- Length: 10 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Poets, philosophers and artists have been trying to explain romantic love for centuries, but it remains one of the most complex and intimidating terrains to navigate. Most people are afraid to be open and honest about their relationships...until now. For Love Understood, Laura Mucha has interviewed hundreds of strangers, from the ages of 8 to 95 in more than 40 countries, asking them to share their most personal stories, feelings and insights about love.
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Insightful, informative, and thought provoking
- By James on 03-05-19
By: Laura Mucha
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Taming Your Outer Child
- Overcoming Self-Sabotage and Healing from Abandonment
- By: Susan Anderson
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 9 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Chances are, you've already had run-ins with your Outer Child - the self-sabotaging, bungling, and impulsive part of your personality. This misguided, hidden nemesis blows your diet, overspends, and ruins your love life. Your Outer Child acts out and fulfills your legitimate childlike needs and wants in the wrong place, at the wrong time, and in counterproductive ways: It goes for immediate gratification and the quick fix in spite of your best-laid plans.
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Her voice made me cringe.
- By zoe on 02-15-21
By: Susan Anderson
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How to Get Over a Boy
- By: Chidera Eggerue
- Narrated by: Chidera Eggerue
- Length: 3 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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In How to Get Over a Boy, Chidera Eggerue will show you, once and for all, how to reframe the stale goal of finding a man. She will equip you with tangible and applicable solutions for every part of your dating life, helping you recognise that men hold as much power in our romantic lives as we grant them. In the past, dating books tend to lean more into the territory of 'how to make him find you hot!', 'how to make him jealous!', 'how to get him to propose!'. But these how-tos are placing men on a pedestal of being 'the prize'. Men are never the prize. You are.
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Touching
- By Erika Soler on 04-21-20
By: Chidera Eggerue
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Bad Sex
- Truth, Pleasure, and an Unfinished Revolution
- By: Nona Willis Aronowitz
- Narrated by: Nona Willis Aronowitz
- Length: 9 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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At thirty-two years old, everything in Nona Willis Aronowitz’s life, and in America, was in disarray. Her marriage was falling apart. Her nuclear family was slipping away. Her heart and libido were both in overdrive. Embroiled in an era of fear, reckoning, and reimagining, her assumptions of what “sexual liberation” meant were suddenly up for debate.
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I was born in the 50s, sexually active in the mid 70s
- By Pixel on 08-22-22
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didn't need a lesson in theology
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Long before the term cuckold was a common word thrown around in the media, Dr. Ley explored the history and science of cuckolding. This groundbreaking work explores why and how some men not only allow, but encourage, their wives to pursue sexual relationships with other men.
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Communication about adventure vs security
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The Art of Bringing Back the Intimacy
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It can be hard when you are the partner with a higher sex drive. You can be left feeling rejected, unattractive, frustrated, and confused–and it’s likely your spouse doesn’t even realize you feel this way. And if you are the partner with the lower drive, you feel guilty, pressured, and frustrated, not sure how to move past this roadblock.
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Enlightening
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Beyond Shame
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We all carry sexual shame. Whether we grew up in the repressive purity culture of American Evangelical Christianity or not, we've all been taught in subtle and not-so-subtle ways that sex (outside of very specific contexts) is immoral and taboo. Psychotherapist Matthias Roberts helps listeners overcome their shame around sex by overcoming three unhealthy coping mechanisms we use to manage that shame.
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Good info, but author is close minded
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What listeners say about Come As You Are: Revised and Updated
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- KCW
- 05-19-21
Todo mundo debería leer este libro
Ojalá hubiera podido leer este libro hace veinte años. Me habría ahorrado mucho sufrimiento y confusión. Es informativo, integral, entretenido, complejo, claro e inspirador. Muy recomendable.
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- Amazon Customer
- 02-15-22
Life-changing content
Although this book wasn’t always well written, the contents was truly life-changing. Would highly recommend for anyone interested in diving into their own sexuality and feeling more comfortable with themselves.
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- GH
- 07-22-22
Amazing content and life changing info!
I loved this book. this is my second book by Emily Nagoski and I love her style, her clear explanations of what she is teaching, the thorough and careful attendance to the delivery of the messages, which are inspirational, raw, and real. The huge amount of work and passion she put into this research and life's work is obvious!
The only thing I didn't like was the piano used to segue from one section to the other. In fact, I hated it. The piano was out of tune and warbley, and if it was overdubbed into the reading as opposed to just between sections, it took all my attention away from what she was saying, garbled her words, and I would either have to rewind and listen again, and possibly then again if it was really bad, or I'd just let it keep going to leave that music behind and miss the message. If it was in tune, that would have been a game changer, but the dissonance in the lower notes grated at me so badly I even found myself saying "ugh" out loud as it came up.
Emily, I love your voice, your delivery, and all of the feeling that you have to back up your own words was truly magical. But the out of tune piano is not helpful and tuned me out of chunks of your books - both of them. please either tune your piano or leave it out completely for the next one.
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- Disgruntled
- 02-06-23
I’m not a liar.
Good book, but offensive to be classed with: “Lied to by half the world” I am a good man, I respect women, and not all men are liars.
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- Richard P. Ashwood Jr.
- 05-26-22
It is good just remember who you are.
This was a good book. Just remember that not everythi h she sayd is going to apply to everyone. The physical part is 100% correct. But if you have faith in a religon. You may want to keep in mind that she is not encouraging you to keep your religious values. After reading thr book. I would suggest that if you are religious that you take the physical truths and add them to your life but dont forget who you are. The vast amount of advice is great. She just forgets to mention that you can still use this book to help yourself while still keeping all your religious pledges as long as you keep it withing the context of marriage.
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- Josh
- 03-01-24
buy it
life changing before I even finished it. as a man it was so helpful in teaching me compassion for my wife and myself. sexual pleasure improved for all parties involved. a welcome relief from all the bro science nonsense out there.
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- Kathleen T.
- 12-31-23
Thank you!
I am
A 67 year old cis-gendered woman. Born in 1956. You have helped me to finally - finally - believe that the sum of me is normal. All I feel, have felt, think about myself, my sexuality - all normal. The concept of breaks and accelerators makes so much sense! It explains so much to me about why my mind and body work the way they do, think the way they do, and react erotically the way they do. Again, I am normal. All of me. In every way. Thank you!
Best of all: I have two elementary school aged granddaughters whom I have the privilege of being close to both emotionally and physically. I will take Ll I’ve learned from your book and do my darndest to teach my grandchildren that they too are normal. That they are perfect just the way they are. I’ll teach them as much as possible about the joy of being a woman. Basically, I’ll teach them your book tailored to their ages.
Thank you!
I highly recommend this book to everyone who is a woman and all who want to understand women. I especially recommend this book to all who love a particular woman and want to understand her better, be supportive in her effort to simply love Nd accept herself as she is. Nothing better than a loving, accepting, supportive partner!
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
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- GG
- 09-05-21
Very educational for both men and women
I listened to this relatively fast, it's easy to u.derstand without too much medical vocabularies and the shared stories made it easy to understand even more. learned a lot about the science behind female orgasm that I highly recommend both men and women to read/listen to this.
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- E. G. Leavitt
- 05-23-21
Every woman should read this book
I say every woman should ready this book but I think everyone should read this book, man or woman. So well written and read by the author. I have already shared this with so many people! so much to learn you can read it over and over again and still learn.
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- Stephanie L.
- 01-09-22
great message. a little repetitive
the piano bits were REALLY distracting. The overall information is great! The metaphors were repetitive and a bit confusing after a while. SO MANY METAPHORS... the one ring, the garden, the hedgehog, the flock. and the names... I'm probably going to have to read it again to get it all straight. The information on trauma is good though.
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