
The Customer Is Always Wrong
An Unhinged Guide to Everything That Sucks About Work (from an Angry Retail Guy) - The Perfect Funny Christmas Gift for Retail, Service, or Office Workers
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Narrated by:
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Scott Seiss
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By:
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Scott Seiss
About this listen
Read by the author.
Customers want you to magically produce something from the back room. Bosses schedule you on your day off. Corporate policies are mandated that make zero practical sense. Sound familiar?
If you've ever worked in customer service (or any job, really), you know that everyone else—the customer, the boss, the company—is always right, and never the employee. Well, lucky for you, the "Angry Retail Guy" is more furious—and funnier—than ever in this hilariously unhinged guide to all the things we wish we could say out loud at work . . . without getting fired. In The Customer Is Always Wrong, you'll laugh (and maybe cry) at this rant-filled, illustrated attack on all the frustrating things that suck about work.
Expanding on the ire-filled, laugh-out-loud viral videos that have made him a (whispered) workplace name, Scott Seiss joyfully eviscerates not only overbearing customers but every annoying aspect of work like purposeless job interview questions, debatable brand values, and the walking human trainwrecks that are our bosses. Scott guides you all the way from first applying to the job, to inevitably gritting your teeth and smiling on your last day when that one manager you despise says, “Come back and visit us!”
The Customer Is Always Wrong is for anyone who:
- Is tired of their "raise" being as close as scientifically possible to 0 percent
- Wants to tell their boss that not even the self-checkout machines want to work here
- Is prepared to tell the next customer who asks to see the manager that the manager has no idea what's going on either
- Calls in sick whenever their PTO request is denied
- Believes entering a store five minutes before it closes should be illegal
- Explains, on a weekly basis, why someone can't use a coupon that expired 17 years ago
- Is physically repulsed by the phrase, "At this company, we're a family. . . ."
This tongue-in-cheek commiseration for workers will make you laugh out loud at the things that drive you crazy in the workplace. With Scott's signature rants, funny anecdotes, and absurd musings, this book celebrates and empowers underpaid and overworked employees with an uproarious ode to what we really think about our jobs and the customers that come with them (except the ones who listen to this book, of course).
Comics and graphics can be found in the audiobook companion PDF download.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2024 Scott Seiss (P)2024 Harper CelebrateListeners also enjoyed...
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- By: Norm Macdonald
- Narrated by: Norm Macdonald, Tim O'Halloran
- Length: 7 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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When Norm Macdonald, one of the greatest stand-up comics of all time, was approached to write a celebrity memoir, he flatly refused, calling the genre “one step below instruction manuals.” Norm then promptly took a two-year hiatus from stand-up comedy to live on a farm in northern Canada. When he emerged he had under his arm a manuscript, a genre-smashing book about comedy, tragedy, love, loss, war, and redemption. When asked if this was the celebrity memoir, Norm replied, “Call it anything you damn like.”
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Bizarre, funny ride
- By Michael Chauvin on 09-25-16
By: Norm Macdonald
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Coach Builder
- How to Turn Your Expertise into a Profitable Coaching Career
- By: Donald Miller
- Narrated by: Donald Miller
- Length: 6 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Have you experienced a moment when you realized your career wasn’t as secure or fulfilling as you thought it was going to be? Maybe you’ve thought about using your skills to start your own consulting business – but you haven’t had the confidence to go for it. Donald Miller has been consulting and coaching for over two decades. He’s consulted some of the world’s top brands including TOMS Shoes, TREK Bicycles and Tempur Sealy.
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Full of actionable advice!
- By Danijel Teofilovic on 03-17-24
By: Donald Miller
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Big Dumb Eyes
- Stories from a Simpler Mind
- By: Nate Bargatze
- Narrated by: Nate Bargatze
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Nate Bargatze used to be a genius. That is, until the summer after seventh grade when he slipped, fell off a cliff, hit his head on a rock, and “my skull got, like, dented or something.” Before this accident, he dreamed of being “an electric engineer, or a doctor that does brain stuff, or a math teacher who teaches the hardest math on earth.” Afterwards, all he could do was stand-up comedy.* But the “brain stuff” industry’s loss is everyone else’s gain because Nate went on to become one of today’s top-grossing comedians, breaking both attendance and streaming records.
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Nate is the best.
- By Todd on 05-06-25
By: Nate Bargatze
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Beyond Suspicion
- By: ITN Productions
- Narrated by: Yinka Bokinni
- Length: 3 hrs and 48 mins
- Original Recording
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In this chilling true crime series, we tell the stories of pillars of the community who betrayed the trust of those around them and challenged what we all think about the people we’ve come to rely on. Police officers, teachers, doctors and nurses, we believe these people are here to protect us from harm, not cause it. This series looks at some of the most heinous crimes perpetrated by people in positions of trust and examines the ripples their actions left on their community.
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First few episodes
- By Tomer on 06-06-25
By: ITN Productions
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Twisted Lives
- By: Tim Tigner
- Narrated by: Jay Snyder
- Length: 9 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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It happens more than you might think. One second someone’s life is totally typical, the next it’s terribly tragic. Everything they had, everything they planned, everything they were, all of it vanishes in a flash. Shock and sorrow leave the victim staring into tomorrow’s void, wondering: How did it happen? Who did it? And why?
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An intriguing story
- By Todd Wynia on 08-07-24
By: Tim Tigner
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Beyond the Hammer
- A Fresh Approach to Leadership, Culture, and Building High Performance Teams
- By: Brian Gottlieb
- Narrated by: Edoardo Ballerini, Brian Gottlieb
- Length: 4 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Employees that don't take ownership of their work. Friction between departments. Inconsistent results. These are the top challenges that face most businesses today. These common issues create high turnover and force managers into crisis mode where they're consumed putting out daily fires. Over time, the very nature of the business changes and a new culture emerges; one shaped by the lowest level of acceptable behavior.
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Really good book on leadership, with actionable insights
- By Dad To Three on 05-19-25
By: Brian Gottlieb
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How Not to Invest
- The ideas, numbers, and behaviors that destroy wealth—and how to avoid them
- By: Barry Ritholtz
- Narrated by: Barry Ritholtz, Nathan Adams Stark - foreword
- Length: 13 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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How Not To Invest shows you a few simple tools and models that will help you avoid the most common mistakes people make with their money. Learn these, and you are ahead of 98% of your peers. Make fewer errors, end up with more money. We all make mistakes. The goal with this book is to help you make fewer of them, and to have the mistakes you do make be less expensive.
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As objective and unbiased as it will probably ever get
- By quadturbo on 03-27-25
By: Barry Ritholtz
He spoke the truth ,,,,
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Hilarious and definitely accurate
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So much catharsis
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I think retail chains should sell this.
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The accuracy is on point.
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How we all really feel
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LMAO
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Whoa. Very funny.
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HILARIOUS
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Ha ha every time you answered with “no,” it made me laugh out loud. Thanks for saying all the things we’re all thinking.
Nailed it.
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