This Is Not a Book About Benedict Cumberbatch
The Joy of Loving Something—Anything—Like Your Life Depends on It
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Narrated by:
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Tanya Schneider
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By:
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Tabitha Carvan
About this listen
Why We Can’t Sleep meets Furiously Happy in this hilarious, heartfelt memoir about one woman’s midlife obsession with Benedict Cumberbatch, and the liberating power of reclaiming our passions as we age, whatever they may be.
Tabitha Carvan was a new mother, at home with two young children, when she fell for the actor Benedict Cumberbatch. You know the guy: strange name, alien face, made Sherlock so sexy that it became one of the most streamed shows in the world? The force of her fixation took everyone—especially Carvan herself—by surprise. But what she slowly realized was that her preoccupation was not about Benedict Cumberbatch at all, as dashing as he might be. It was about finally feeling passionate about something, anything, again at a point in her life when she had lost touch with her own identity and sense of self.
In This Is Not a Book About Benedict Cumberbatch, Carvan explores what happens to women's desires after we leave adolescence…and why the space in our lives for pure, unadulterated joy is squeezed ever smaller as we age. She shines a light onto the hidden corners of fandom, from the passion of the online communities to the profound real-world connections forged between Cumberbatch devotees. But more importantly, she asks: what happens if we simply decide to follow our interests like we used to—unabashedly, audaciously, shamelessly? After all, Carvan realizes, there’s true, untapped power in finding your “thing” (even if that thing happens to be a British-born Marvel superhero) and loving it like your life depends on it.
©2022 Tabitha Carvan (P)2022 Penguin AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
One of Good Housekeeping’s 20 New Books to Add to Your Summer 2022 Reading List
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One of MPR News’s Best Books of 2022
“Part memoir, part self-help, this one will empower you to rediscover your own obsessions. And yes, Google image search the Sherlock actor, too."–Good Housekeeping
“The title alone inspires a smile, but the book itself is hilarious, and wise…[Carvan’s] story is really about the joy that comes with rediscovering and indulging youthful passions and pleasures.”–AARP
“Winningly effervescent…[The book] seems written in the blush of first love, an aria of joyous discovery at the shedding of an obsolete inhibition…To read This Is Not a Book About Benedict Cumberbatch is to follow Carvan on a path to overcoming her shame and reveling in the sheer frivolity of her love for the Sherlock star alongside the women [who] share it with her. Once she does, she proclaims, ‘it felt so good—you would not believe how good!—that I didn’t mind if it made me the biggest weirdo in the world.’ She almost makes you feel as good as that when she gets there.”—Slate
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Whether or not one has lived an exceptional or dramatic life, we inherently understand that writing memoir—whether it’s a book, blog, or just a letter to a child - is the single greatest portal to self-examination. Stop treading water in writing exercises or hiding behind “writer’s block” and learn how to write with intent. Marion Roach Smith’s disarmingly frank but wildly fun tactics offer you simple and effective guidelines that work. Your legacy beings now.
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amazing what you can learn from brevity
- By Schwartz-Burrill on 09-15-11
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Dear Fahrenheit 451
- Love and Heartbreak in the Stacks
- By: Annie Spence
- Narrated by: Stephanie Spicer
- Length: 5 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Librarians spend their lives weeding - not weeds, but books - books that have reached the end of their shelf life both literally and figuratively. They remove books that patrons no longer check out, and they put back books they treasure. Annie Spence, who has a decade of experience as a Midwestern librarian, does this not only at her Michigan library but also at home, for her neighbors, at cocktail parties - everywhere. In Dear Fahrenheit 451, she addresses those books directly.
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Totally captivating
- By Grace Smith on 03-24-18
By: Annie Spence
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My Life with Bob
- Flawed Heroine Keeps Book of Books, Plot Ensues
- By: Pamela Paul
- Narrated by: Eileen Stevens, Pamela Paul
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Pamela Paul has kept a single book by her side for 28 years - carried throughout high school and college, hauled from Paris to London to Thailand, from job to job, safely packed away and then carefully removed from apartment to house to its current perch on a shelf over her desk - reliable if frayed, anonymous-looking yet deeply personal. This book has a name: Bob. Bob is Paul's Book of Books, a journal that records every book she's ever read.
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An uncanny mirror and a celebration of book love
- By Cherilyn Parsons on 07-28-19
By: Pamela Paul
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Feminists Don't Wear Pink and Other Lies
- Amazing Women on What the F-Word Means to Them
- By: Scarlett Curtis - curator
- Narrated by: Rosie Akerman, Pippa Bennett-Warner, Grace Campbell, and others
- Length: 5 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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A diverse group of celebrities, activists, and artists open up about what feminism means to them, with the goal of helping listeners come to their own personal understanding of the word.
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4.5/5 Estrellas
- By Airy on 01-27-21
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Girl, Wash Your Face
- Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are So You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be
- By: Rachel Hollis
- Narrated by: Rachel Hollis
- Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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As the founder of the lifestyle website TheChicSite.com and CEO of her own media company, Rachel Hollis developed an immense online community by sharing tips for better living while fearlessly revealing the messiness of her own life. Now, in this challenging and inspiring new book, Rachel exposes the 20 lies and misconceptions that too often hold us back from living joyfully and productively.
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More for women who are mothers
- By MeredithNCSU girl on 04-07-18
By: Rachel Hollis
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I Don’t Care about Your Band
- What I Learned from Indie Rockers, Trust Funders, Pornographers, Felons, Faux-Sensitive Hipsters, and Other Guys I’ve Dated
- By: Julie Klausner
- Narrated by: Julie Klausner
- Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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In the tradition of Cynthia Heimel and Chelsea Handler, and with the boisterous iconoclasm of Amy Sedaris, Julie Klausner's candid and funny debut I Don't Care about Your Band sheds light on the humiliations we endure to find love - and the lessons that can be culled from the wreckage. I Don't Care about Your Band posits that lately the worst guys to date are the ones who seem sensitive. It's the jerks in nice guy clothing, not the players in Ed Hardy, who break the hearts of modern girls.
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Shopping for Men at the Wrong Mall
- By Pamela Harvey on 01-02-13
By: Julie Klausner
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Pure
- Inside the Evangelical Movement That Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free
- By: Linda Kay Klein
- Narrated by: Linda Kay Klein
- Length: 8 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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In the 1990s, a “purity industry” emerged out of the white evangelical Christian culture. Purity rings, purity pledges, and purity balls came with a dangerous message: girls are potential sexual “stumbling blocks” for boys and men, and any expression of a girl’s sexuality could reflect the corruption of her character. This message traumatized many girls - resulting in anxiety, fear, and experiences that mimicked the symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder - and trapped them in a cycle of shame.
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I expected a different ending I suppose
- By Military Dad on 12-12-18
By: Linda Kay Klein
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Cinderella Ate My Daughter
- Dispatches from the Front Lines of the New Girlie-Girl Culture
- By: Peggy Orenstein
- Narrated by: Peggy Orenstein
- Length: 6 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Pink and pretty or predatory and hardened, sexualized girlhood influences our daughters from infancy onward, telling them that how a girl looks matters more than who she is. Somewhere between the exhilarating rise of Girl Power in the 1990s and today, the pursuit of physical perfection has been recast as a source - the source - of female empowerment. And commercialization has spread the message faster and farther, reaching girls at ever-younger ages.
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No solution just worry
- By Marie on 06-28-12
By: Peggy Orenstein
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It's Not You
- 27 (Wrong) Reasons You're Single
- By: Sara Eckel
- Narrated by: Nina Alvamar
- Length: 4 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Based on her popular Modern Love column, Sara Eckel’s It’s Not You challenges these myths, encouraging singletons to stop picking apart their personalities and to start tapping into their own wisdom about who and what is right for them. Supported by the latest psychological and sociological research, as well as interviews with people who have experienced longtime singledom, Eckel creates a strong and empowering argument to understand and accept that there’s no one reason why you’re single - you just are.
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Good Book
- By Anonymous User on 05-24-20
By: Sara Eckel
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If It's Not One Thing, It's Your Mother
- By: Julia Sweeney
- Narrated by: Julia Sweeney
- Length: 6 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Since her time on Saturday Night Live, where she created the infamous androgynous character "Pat", Julia Sweeney has gone on to establish herself as a witty, captivating performer of one-woman shows, like God Said Ha!, In the Family Way, and Letting Go of God. She gave a TED talk sharing how she explained the birds and the bees to her eight-year-old daughter, Mulan, which ignited an incredible response. Now, when it comes to talking about motherhood, people want to hear what Julia has to say.
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I Love Julia Sweeney
- By Lisa on 04-05-13
By: Julia Sweeney
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Crossing Over
- By: John Edward
- Narrated by: John Edward
- Length: 4 hrs and 45 mins
- Abridged
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In Crossing Over, John brings his listeners with him on the extraordinary journey that has been his life since his New York Times best seller One Last Time was published in 1998. In the style of his TV show and personal appearances (poignant, funny, and remarkably candid) John deals head-on with the controversial issues he has confronted on his voyage as a psychic medium. Listeners might be surprised to learn that it hasn't always been smooth sailing.
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Intriguing and entertaining
- By Betty on 05-10-09
By: John Edward
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Throw Out Fifty Things
- Clear the Clutter, Find Your Life
- By: Gail Blanke
- Narrated by: Gail Blanke
- Length: 3 hrs and 35 mins
- Abridged
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Throw Out Fifty Things is truly an eye-opener. According to Blanke, our lives are so filled with junk from the past—from dried up tubes of crazy glue to old grudges—that's it's a wonder we can get up in the morning, never mind go to work, care for our children and parents, and just put one foot in front of the other. Blanke wants to start a movement of people across America throwing out 50 things (magazines count as one!) that will help liberate us from the stuff—both physical and mental—that clutters our lives.
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So useful, listened to it a 2nd time right away.
- By Zeus on 02-02-10
By: Gail Blanke
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Every Love Story Is a Ghost Story
- A Life of David Foster Wallace
- By: D. T. Max
- Narrated by: Malcolm Hillgartner
- Length: 12 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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David Foster Wallace was the leading literary light of his generation, a man who not only captivated readers with his prose but also mesmerized them with his brilliant mind. In this, the first biography of the writer, D. T. Max sets out to chart Wallace’s tormented, anguished, and often triumphant battle to succeed as a novelist as he fights off depression and addiction to emerge with his masterpiece, Infinite Jest.
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Max avoids hagiography or a sycophant's biography
- By Darwin8u on 06-11-13
By: D. T. Max
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The Cows
- By: Dawn O'Porter, Laura Kirman
- Narrated by: Dawn O'Porter, Karen Cass
- Length: 11 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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The Cows is a powerful novel about three women. In all the noise of modern life, each needs to find her own voice. It's about friendship and being female. It's bold and brilliant. It's searingly perceptive. It's about never following the herd. And everyone is going to be talking about it.
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Smart, funny, feminist
- By Mark on 11-05-17
By: Dawn O'Porter, and others
What listeners say about This Is Not a Book About Benedict Cumberbatch
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Alison Campbell
- 04-22-23
This book made me happy
This is a wonderful book. I really enjoyed it. Super honest and such a good message.
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- Sheila Shostac
- 08-25-22
You are not alone so let’s enjoy the ride!
This book opened up the discussion about our love for Fandoms and why we need them at certain times in our lives. The narration felt like you were sharing tea with a friend.
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- Mariah
- 03-17-23
Relatable and Essential
This is the exact kid of story that every fan girl needs to hear. I grew up emphatically fixated on new things every cool me of years. I have found this hasn’t stopped with adulthood. I used to feel a kind of guilt or shame around what I used to think was annoying and immature and stories like this one help to destigmatize and unify. I am also interested in fandom psychology and this was a great first read in that category.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Jacqueline Wolven
- 02-04-23
My heart was singing
In my 50’s I had unexplainable love for Sam Heughan and all things Outlander. I couldn't quite understand what was happening... Ohhhhhh. And it's sooo worth it. Love what you love and let's others love what they love.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Jeanna Schultz
- 06-04-22
Please get Benedict Cumberbatch to narrate! ❤️
I loved it! I was often daydreaming and giggling like a school girl as I was listening. I feel like this book was written just for me and it's cool to hear that there are other folks out there who are similarly delighted w Benedict Cumberbatch, specifically as Sherlock Holmes. Good message - have fun, own it, find your joy, embrace your genuine self.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Rachael P.
- 05-05-23
An excuse to chase your passions again
Is it really about Benedict Cumberbatch? No, not about him per se, but he is a main character and it is deliciously funny. What an amazing book. This book made me laugh, made me cry, and then laugh again. For any woman who has stopped loving things with unbridled passion due to shame, feeling stupid, or being told to grow up, this book is for you. Remember when you were a kid and you loved things with your whole soul even if you didn’t fully understand why? This book tells you why and then shows you that feeling never had to end. You can rekindle it, find your passions again, and go after them at full speed without shame, guilt, or embarrassment.
Do yourself a favor and read this book. Enjoy its humor, enjoy that it’s not an in-depth, scientific foray on finding joy, and dare to think about what might make you feel alive again. And…..maybe watch BBC’s Sherlock while your at it. You’ll be glad you did. 😉
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall
- Amazon Customer
- 11-13-22
No
Got this book because of a recommendation. I couldn't even finish it. I'm a mom in my 40s wirh 2 little kids and thankfully can not relate to this book at all. Just pass.
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1 person found this helpful