Platonic
How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make—and Keep—Friends
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Narrated by:
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Marisa G. Franco PhD
About this listen
Instant New York Times bestseller
Is understanding the science of attachment the key to building lasting friendships and finding “your people” in an ever-more-fragmented world?
How do we make and keep friends in an era of distraction, burnout, and chaos, especially in a society that often prizes romantic love at the expense of other relationships? In Platonic, Dr. Marisa G. Franco unpacks the latest, often counterintuitive findings about the bonds between us—for example, why your friends aren’t texting you back (it’s not because they hate you!), and the myth of “friendships happening organically” (making friends, like cultivating any relationship, requires effort!). As Dr. Franco explains, to make and keep friends you must understand your attachment style—secure, anxious, or avoidant: it is the key to unlocking what’s working (and what’s failing) in your friendships.
Making new friends, and deepening longstanding relationships, is possible at any age—in fact, it’s essential. The good news: there are specific, research-based ways to improve the number and quality of your connections using the insights of attachment theory and the latest scientific research on friendship. Platonic provides a clear and actionable blueprint for forging strong, lasting connections with others—and for becoming our happiest, most fulfilled selves in the process.
©2022 Marisa G. Franco (P)2022 Penguin AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
"Dr. Marisa G. Franco and Platonic have been invaluable guides on my journey to nurture and deepen my friendships. Her advice is wise, concrete, and effective—and my friendships are better for it.”—Glennon Doyle, author of Untamed, Founder of Together Rising
“Dr. Franco’s book ‘Platonic’ is an ode to modern friendship, complete with a practical guide to making and keeping friends. It reminds us of the importance of platonic love in today’s society—bucking the notion that romantic love trumps everything else in our lives…the depth of research Ms. Franco weaves into the book sheds light onto an aspect of our world that—like an old and trusted pal—it may be too easy to take for granted.”—Wall Street Journal
"A remarkable examination of the epidemic of loneliness and sound advice for alleviating it...A pleasing mix of research, advice, and humor, this book is a useful tonic to a key social ailment."—Kirkus Reviews (starred)
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- An Inclusive Guide to Navigating the Most Difficult Relationship Issues We Face in the Modern Age
- By: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Elizabeth Earnshaw is here to help. The renowned Gottman therapist, founder of A Better Life Therapy, and influential Instagram therapist behind @lizlistens has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents for today’s generation the most effective and proven steps for relationship success.
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I want this to work too. Excellent information, excruciating execution
- By Sunny Bettley on 03-17-23
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The Breakup Bible
- The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce
- By: Rachel Sussman
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
- By Dawson on 11-30-17
By: Rachel Sussman
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Super You
- Release Your Inner Superhero
- By: Emily Gordon
- Narrated by: Emily Gordon
- Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Superheroes don't start from glorious beginnings. Their origins are almost always marked by traumatic events that leave them helpless and scared. Batman witnessed his parents' murder. Superman was sent away from his dying planet with no one to guide him as he grew up. Orphaned Catwoman was forced to steal food to survive on the streets of Gotham. What makes these superheroes super is their determination to not be defined by helplessness. They embrace their origins, their flaws, and their mistakes and strive every day to become the best versions of themselves.
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A wonderful book filled with empathy and humanity.
- By Vincent on 10-06-15
By: Emily Gordon
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Love Understood
- The Science of Who, How and Why We Love
- By: Laura Mucha
- Narrated by: Laura Mucha
- Length: 10 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Poets, philosophers and artists have been trying to explain romantic love for centuries, but it remains one of the most complex and intimidating terrains to navigate. Most people are afraid to be open and honest about their relationships...until now. For Love Understood, Laura Mucha has interviewed hundreds of strangers, from the ages of 8 to 95 in more than 40 countries, asking them to share their most personal stories, feelings and insights about love.
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Insightful, informative, and thought provoking
- By James on 03-05-19
By: Laura Mucha
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Curious?
- By: Todd Kashdan
- Narrated by: Todd Kashdan
- Length: 6 hrs and 4 mins
- Abridged
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Dead cats. That's the image many people conjure up when you mention curiosity. An image perpetuated by a dusty old proverb that has long represented the extent of our understanding of the term. This book might not put the proverb to rest, but it will flip it upside down: far from killing anything, curiosity breathes new life into almost everything it touches.
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Transformative & Engaging
- By Hans on 04-29-09
By: Todd Kashdan
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I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You
- Seven Steps to Saving Your Relationship
- By: Andrew G. Marshall
- Narrated by: Andrew G. Marshall
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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In I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You - a real-life relationship guide from couples' counselor Andrew G. Marshall - partners and individuals who have "fallen out of love" or want to rekindle the love that once was will learn how to use Marshall 's program with impressive results. This is a much-needed book to help men and women of all ages in any type of committed romantic relationship to truly understand love and to point out the everyday habits that undermine growing together.
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If you feel stuck in a relationship, this book is a MUST!
- By Christopher on 05-09-19
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Keeping Love Alive as Memories Fade
- The 5 Love Languages and the Alzheimer's Journey
- By: Gary Chapman, Edward G. Shaw, Debbie Barr
- Narrated by: Jon Gauger
- Length: 5 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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If you're listening to this, you may have a loved one suffering from dementia, and you're looking for hope. The disease has already taken so much, and though you're determined to fight, you're weary. Keeping Love Alive as Memories Fade will renew your strength. With guidance from professionals and stories of committed caregivers, you'll learn how others have braved the road ahead and how you can, too. Using the five love languages and other creative ideas, you can discover, like many others, the resilient power of love.
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Informative & Practical
- By kerryleigh on 11-29-16
By: Gary Chapman, and others
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Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That?
- Encouragement for Women Involved with Angry and Controlling Men
- By: Lundy Bancroft
- Narrated by: Gary Galone
- Length: 11 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Like a constant friend, this collection of meditations is a source of strength and reassurance designed to speak to women like you, women in relationships with angry and controlling men. It helps you to digest what is happening a piece at a time, so you can gain clarity, safety, and freedom.
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Just what I needed.
- By lori Goodson on 11-07-15
By: Lundy Bancroft
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- By: John Townsend
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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Very insightful
- By Amazon Customer on 05-17-19
By: John Townsend
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Should I Stay or Should I Go?
- A Guide to Knowing If Your Relationship Can - and Should - Be Saved
- By: Lundy Bancroft, JAC Patrissi
- Narrated by: Stephen R. Thorne
- Length: 13 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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In this supportive and straightforward guide, Lundy Bancroft, the author of Why Does He Do That?, and communication specialist JAC Patrissi offer a way for women to practically take stock of their relationships and move forward, with or without their partners.
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Paradigm Shift
- By Sydnee Adams-Hancock on 04-08-16
By: Lundy Bancroft, and others
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The Secret Lives of Introverts
- Inside Our Hidden World
- By: Jenn Granneman
- Narrated by: Susie Berneis
- Length: 7 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Is there a hidden part of you that no one else sees? Do you have a vivid inner world of thoughts and emotions that your peers and loved ones can't seem to access? Have you ever been told you're too quiet, shy, boring, or awkward? Are your habits and comfort zones questioned by a society that doesn't seem to get you? If so, you might be an introvert. On behalf of those who have long been misunderstood, rejected, or ignored, fellow introvert Jenn Granneman writes a compassionate vindication.
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Unnecessary voices
- By Adrienne Warg on 09-13-19
By: Jenn Granneman
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Unrequited
- Women and Romantic Obsession
- By: Lisa A. Phillips
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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The summer Lisa A. Phillips turned 30, she fell in love with someone who didn't return her feelings. She soon became obsessed. She followed him around, called him compulsively, and talked about him endlessly. One desperate morning, after she snuck into his apartment building, he picked up a baseball bat to protect himself and began to dial 911. Her unrequited love had changed her from a sane, conscientious college teacher and radio reporter into someone she barely recognized.
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Great book! So-so narrator....
- By ToluGrace on 04-14-15
By: Lisa A. Phillips
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How to Be a Best Friend Forever
- Making and Keeping Lifetime Relationships
- By: Dr. John Townsend
- Narrated by: Dr. John Townsend
- Length: 2 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Our world has diluted the meaning of friendship, but the reality is, there’s nothing like the sustaining strength of true-blue, forever friends. Still, many people are convinced that they’ll never find such lifelong connections—or that they don’t need them. In this encouraging audio book, best-selling author and psychologist John Townsend delivers hope and help for making these relationships a reality—and for making them even better if you’ve already got a “bestie.”
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This is a Christian based book.
- By lisak227 on 11-17-14
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Hope to revise this review soon...
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Humans are social creatures: In this simple and obvious fact lies both the problem and the solution to the current crisis of loneliness. In his groundbreaking audiobook, the 19th surgeon general of the United States Dr. Vivek Murthy makes a case for loneliness as a public health concern: a root cause and contributor to many of the epidemics sweeping the world today from alcohol and drug addiction to violence to depression and anxiety.
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Losing 7 Friends to Suicide, I’m Glad I Read This
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Robin Dunbar is the world-renowned psychologist and author who famously discovered Dunbar's number: how our capacity for friendship is limited to around 150 people. In Friends, he looks at friendship in the round, at the way different types of friendship and family relationships intersect, or at the complex of psychological and behavioural mechanisms that underpin friendships and make them possible - and just how complicated the business of making and keeping friends actually is.
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Insightful
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We Need to Hang Out
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In this “entertaining mix of social science, memoir, and humor, as if a Daniel Goleman book were filtered through the lens of Will Ferrell” (The New York Times Book Review) a middle-aged man embarks on an entertaining and relatable quest to reprioritize his ties with his buddies and forge new friendships, all while balancing work, marriage, and kids.
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Worth the listen.
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How to Know a Person
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As David Brooks observes, “There is one skill that lies at the heart of any healthy person, family, school, community organization, or society: the ability to see someone else deeply and make them feel seen—to accurately know another person, to let them feel valued, heard, and understood.” And yet we humans don’t do this well. All around us are people who feel invisible, unseen, misunderstood. In How to Know a Person, Brooks sets out to help us do better, posing questions that are essential for all of us: If you want to know a person, what kind of attention should you cast on them?
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A book he was ready to write
- By Adam Shields on 11-17-23
By: David Brooks
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The Business of Friendship
- Making the Most of Our Relationships Where We Spend Most of Our Time
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Friendship expert Shasta Nelson unpacks the distinct ways we can make work relationships the healthiest they can be, both for the sake of the employee and the mission of the company. She inspires listeners to see why friendship is crucial to our health and our careers, and teaches us exactly how to develop the supportive and meaningful connections we need.
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Friendship & Business
- By Wendy Faye on 07-30-24
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What listeners say about Platonic
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Kieyel
- 10-03-22
A better person 💕✨
Thank you for your views on friendship! This has helped me not only with my relationship and friendships but my connection with myself. I will practice being a good friend to myself and others daily because of this book. I’ll be going to get an actual copy of this book for my personal library!
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- Gabby Bankston
- 02-02-23
Great Read!
Great in so many ways! Definitely multi-genre. This book shines a light on so many unspoken and ignored topics. A good spark for meaningful conversations
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- Jen S
- 04-08-23
Really helpful
This was such a great book tackling a really difficult topic for most adults. I found so many helpful tips and realized some unconscious mistakes I was making while trying to grow my friend group as an adult. Very grateful for the insight.
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- Marney Kelley
- 05-10-23
Really great book!
This book includes research and addresses current cultural issues as well as historical information. Must read!
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- Brian
- 07-14-23
Really enjoyed it
I thought the historical references are particularly interesting. It’s sad that close friendship between men today have been conflated with homo-hysteria. I count myself lucky to have many close friendships with men. The author does a really great job, narrating the book which is rare. Definitely recommended!
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- Amanda Nace
- 10-09-22
So nice I listened twice
And I may listen a third time. After a recent friend breakup that left me feeling disheartened, I found this book and it has given me inspiration to be a better friend, make and keep boundaries and get out and meet new friends with loving intention. The history of friendship peppered with anecdotal stories made it all the more interesting. Her narration makes the book as well since you can hear her passion and feel for the topic. 10 outta 10!
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- Anonymous User
- 10-13-22
Intellectual and human
This book skillfully combines hard data with real life and makes the psychology of relationship accessible to all through plain, beautiful language.
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- TRACI
- 12-17-22
Loved loved loved
Wow! What a wonderful book, one I will read over and over as I have struggled and relate with the examples of others written about in this book, it is eye opening and extremely motivational. Written so well you won’t be able to put it down, Thank you , your research is going to change so many lives!
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- Anonymous User
- 08-03-23
Loved this book!
So good! Culture changing! If we can shift to nuturing all of our connections, loneliness will improve in this country
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- V.Vivien
- 03-31-24
Intriguing Book About the Science of Friendship
There is so much I love about this book! It really dives into the science behind platonic friendships, and the benefits that are social connections can have to our lives. It also talks about different attachment styles, and ways that I had never learned about before. Overall, I’m walking away after reading this book knowing a lot more about the power of connection and why it’s important for me to invest in my friendships.
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