This Is Not a Horror Movie
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Narrated by:
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Blake Lockheart
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By:
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Sara Dobie Bauer
About this listen
Emory Jones loves two things: horror movies and Connor Nichols.
For the past four years, Emory, Connor, and their families have vacationed side by side on Longboat Key, Florida. Eighteen-year-old Emory has pined for his neighbor from behind the covers of Stephen King books, but college boy Connor has never noticed him. Probably because Emory looks like Jack Skellington with good hair.
Emory anticipates another predictable summer of sunburn and disappointment. Instead, he ends up with a mystery on his hands when a beloved beach bum goes missing, and Connor volunteers to help with the search. Turns out it’s not just scary movie cops who are worthless, so the boys start an investigation of their own - leading them straight to an abandoned beach resort.
Despite the danger, Emory and Connor grow closer, but as Emory’s gay dreams start coming true, so do the horror movie tropes he so loves. Even though he knows that sex equals death in slasher flicks, Emory can’t keep his hands off the guy of his teenage dreams.
This Is Not a Horror Movie is a 78,000-word new adult gay rom-com...with a monster.
"In This Is Not a Horror Movie, you have two highly engaging characters and a mysterious and funny horror story that simply oozes summertime spirit." (Best-selling author Lily Morton)
©2021 Sara Dobie Bauer (P)2021 Sara Dobie BauerListeners also enjoyed...
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The Garretts are everything the Reeds are not: loud, numerous, messy, affectionate. And every day from her balcony perch, 17-year-old Samantha Reed wishes she was one of them...until one summer evening, Jase Garrett climbs her terrace and changes everything. As the two fall fiercely in love, Jase's family makes Samantha one of their own. Then in an instant, the bottom drops out of her world and she is suddenly faced with an impossible decision. Which perfect family will save her? Or is it time she saved herself?
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A well written coming of age book
- By Ezinwanyi on 10-23-15
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Ziggy, Stardust and Me
- By: James Brandon
- Narrated by: Tom Picasso
- Length: 10 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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The year is 1973. The Watergate hearings are in full swing. The Vietnam War is still raging. And homosexuality is still officially considered a mental illness. In the midst of these trying times is 16-year-old Jonathan Collins, a bullied, anxious, asthmatic kid, who aside from an alcoholic father and his sympathetic neighbor and friend Starla, is completely alone. To cope, Jonathan escapes to the safe haven of his imagination, where his hero David Bowie's Ziggy Stardust and dead relatives, including his mother, guide him through the rough terrain of his life.
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Finally
- By Demonte Dandridge on 09-18-19
By: James Brandon
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This Raging Light
- By: Estelle Laure
- Narrated by: Sandy Rustin
- Length: 5 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Lucille seems to have nothing going for her. With the bills piling in, the house falling apart around her, and her sister's growing distress, it is precisely the worst possible moment for Lucille to fall recklessly in love with her best friend's twin brother, Digby, who is practically engaged.
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Amazing Loving and Sexy
- By Princess Lucy on 12-28-17
By: Estelle Laure
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The Cursed Series, Parts 1 & 2
- If I'd Known/Knowing You
- By: Rebecca Donovan
- Narrated by: Phoebe Strole
- Length: 16 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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It was supposed to be a Friday night like any other for Lana and her best friends. Three girls out to cause a little trouble. Break a few hearts. And try not to get caught. Except on this night, Lana Peri is the sole witness to a horrific crime, and she can’t say a word. Not if she wants to protect her friends. No one will believe her word over his, so he gets away with it. And she’s forced to pay for her silence. Instead of serving time in juvie, Lana is sentenced to a boarding school for privileged teens, Blackwood School in Vermont....
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Great story-terrible narration
- By Alexis Randles on 01-27-21
By: Rebecca Donovan
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Loving the Chase
- Heart of the Storm
- By: Sharla Lovelace
- Narrated by: Lauren Ezzo
- Length: 10 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Charming, adventurous Zach Chase has always craved the spotlight, and now he's on the hunt for publicity for his family's storm-chasing business. So when a reality TV network approaches him with the idea for a show profiling their work, he can't resist. But the last person he expects to walk into the meeting is the former love of his life.
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Nice
- By Amazon Customer on 04-26-23
By: Sharla Lovelace
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Come Back to Me
- Come Back to Me Series, Book 1
- By: Mila Gray
- Narrated by: Tim Paige, Samantha Summers
- Length: 10 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Marine Kit Ryan finds himself back home on leave and dangerously drawn to his best friend Riley's sister, Jessa - the one girl he can't have. Exhausted from fighting his feelings, Kit finally gives in, and Jessa isn't strong enough to resist diving headfirst into a passionate relationship. But what was just supposed to be a summer romance develops into something far greater than either of them expected. Jessa's finally found the man of her dreams, and Kit's finally discovered there's someone he'd sacrifice everything for.
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Female narrators words are so choppy!
- By Anonymous User on 10-08-24
By: Mila Gray
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Ruin
- By: Rachel Van Dyken
- Narrated by: Eileen Stevens, Stephen Bel Davies
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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I'm not your typical girl. I've been running away from the memories that haunt me for so long that depression has become my only comfort. I was content in the darkness...until Wes Michels offered to be my light. I didn't know that time wasn't my ally - that every second that ticked past was one step closer to the end of something that was beginning to mean the end of myself. He tried to warn me. He promised me all he was able to offer - each moment as it came - but it would never be enough.
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Loved this book so hard.
- By M. Ellen on 12-27-14
By: Rachel Van Dyken
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Draw
- Gentry Boys #1
- By: Cora Brent
- Narrated by: Stephanie Rose, Soren Gray
- Length: 8 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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I don't even know if love is real. After running from the bastard who brutalized me, I limped back to Arizona, choosing a vibrant college town in the hopes of starting over. I never expected to find him there. Cord Gentry. He and his brothers were tough, lusty forces of nature I'd known since childhood. Years ago Cord seduced me as a sick game. I've hated him ever since. Now here he is again, a man who beats other men bloody for money.
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Let’s hear it for the (Gentry) boyz!
- By Lisa on 04-14-19
By: Cora Brent
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Ryan's Bed
- By: Tijan
- Narrated by: Therese Plummer
- Length: 9 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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I crawled into Ryan Jensen’s bed that first night by accident. I barely knew him. I thought it was his sister’s bed - her room. It took seconds to realize my error, and I should've left... I didn’t. I didn’t jump out. I didn’t get embarrassed. I relaxed. And that night, in that moment, it was the only thing I craved. I asked to stay. He let me, and I slept. The truth? I never wanted to leave his bed. If I could've stayed forever, I would have. He became my sanctuary. Because - four hours earlier - my twin sister killed herself.
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One of Tijan's Better Books!
- By Ryan Mauricio on 06-16-18
By: Tijan
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Never Enough
- By: Roxie Noir
- Narrated by: Matthew Lloyd Davies, Tatiana Sokolov
- Length: 9 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Marisol locks me out of my own concert by accident. She's wearing a suit at a rock show, searching for her lost law school textbook, has no idea who I am, and for the first time in years, I'm hooked. She's smart, driven, and utterly gorgeous. The sort of girl who earnestly believes in following the rules and hates when others don't. I'm a huge rock star, recovering addict, and general f--kup. Our relationship is for show and that's all. But with every smile, every laugh, and every breathtaking glance at her curves, I want her more.
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Great Love Story!
- By Jan M on 09-14-17
By: Roxie Noir
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Built to Last
- By: Erin Hahn
- Narrated by: Lisa Zimmerman, Kale Williams
- Length: 8 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Shelby Springfield has spent the last ten years trying to overcome her past, sanding it away like she does the rough spots on the vintage furniture finds she makes over. But as a former child star, it’s hard to forget a mediocre pop career, a meltdown widely documented by the paparazzi, and a huge public break with her former co-star Lyle Jessup. It’s also hard to forget her other co-star and childhood sweetheart, Cameron Riggs—the one who got away.
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Cute !!
- By Evie Miller on 10-18-24
By: Erin Hahn
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Hellhole
- By: Gina Damico
- Narrated by: Macleod Andrews
- Length: 9 hrs
- Unabridged
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There was a time when geeky, squeaky-clean Max Kilgore would never lie or steal or even think about murder. Then he accidentally unearths a devil, and Max's choices are no longer his own. The big red guy has a penchant for couch surfing and junk food - and you should never underestimate evil on a sugar high.
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What you would expect from Gina Damico
- By Midwestbonsai on 03-03-15
By: Gina Damico
What listeners say about This Is Not a Horror Movie
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- PattyH
- 06-18-21
I love this !
This audible needs to be made into a movie, it would definitely be an excellent movie! The characters are perfect and each compliments the other .
Blake Lockheart does an amazing job with his narration. slow and sexy in the right areas, full of suspense and intense when needed.
I received this audible free, this is my honest review
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1 person found this helpful
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- Claire Annovazzi
- 10-21-21
I really didn’t expect to love it that much
I really didn’t expect to love it that much. I mean, I’m so far from a teenager in love that I thought I’d find it cute, and that’s it. But the horror element–though not the best I’ve ever read–was quite compelling.
I’m a big horror fan too, and I enjoyed all the references to books and movies in the genre. That was my window into the book, the way I could relate to the characters. And the way they use their nerdy knowledge to investigate the mystery that plagues their little vacation town? Hilarious.
The romance was cute. We only get Emory’s point of view, but although we have no indication his pining after his older neighbor is requited, we KNOW it is. It was still adorable to see him fumbling under Connor’s marks of affection. Though there’s passion and desire described, it’s behind closed doors, so don’t expect too much sexy in this book.
The writing was great for Emory’s point of view. We’re clearly in the mind of an insecure teenage boy–though he’s already a man. Between self deprecation and misunderstandings, I felt the writing style matched with Emory’s mind, and I enjoyed the little dry humor and sarcasm that sometimes dripped from the words.
The narration was perfect for this book. Though it was my first time listening to the narrator’s work, I’ll come back to it soon because I enjoyed the way he delivered the humorous lines as well as the deeper emotions. A great listen for an unusual romance novel.
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- Trio
- 12-16-22
Creative, Clever & Witty!
I see why I saw folks shelving Sara Dobie Bauer's This is Not a Horror Movie as "humor". It's clever, and the dialog is super witty.
Absolutely loved the narrator, Blake Lockheart. His voices suit each character beautifully, he has great enthusiasm, and I really liked the sound of his voice. Hopefully I'll have time to explore his other titles soon.
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- JEN
- 08-03-21
LOVED IT!
I LOVED this book. It's hilarious, sweet, and not remotely predictable, (not counting expecting some kind of happy ending). I was sad when it was over, even though I binged it, because it was just so darn good. The lead characters, their family members, and the quirky people of the beach community were just awesome to spend time with, (in a manner of speaking).
I highly recommend this book. The audio was also excellent - this was a new to me narrator & I would not hesitate to listen to other books done by him.
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- Nova
- 06-14-21
I Loved this Story
Sara Dobie Bauer, Great job!! Your writing is outstanding.
So very entertaining.
A new to me narrator, Blake Lock heart did an amazing job.
Great cast of characters, a YA romance with a paranormal demon and a ton of laughs.
Summers in Florida aren't always what you expect.
Thrilling and suspenseful. a must listen to coming of age cleverly written story.
well worth the credit and your time to listen.
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- Bec
- 08-31-21
really really enjoyed
The book was funny and well written and narration was perfect. Will be looking for more from both the author and narrator.
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- David
- 08-17-21
A Refreshing Read!
It was so nice to see a positive, gay relationship in a novel that develops slowly and naturally without being forced. The blend of humor, horror, and romance is perfect!
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- Rebecca K
- 11-07-23
Loved it
This is a new to me author. I loved this story. Witty and sweet, with a side of horror story. It blended really well, all the characters and the horror and romance. All the characters were very clearly drawn, even the side characters. And it was perfectly narrated by Blake Lockheart. He was amazing embodying all the characters and nailed the tone of the book. Definitely recommended.
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- Marie
- 06-21-21
love the mystery
this did keep me on my toes and the mc love was just swoon love this book
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- Amazon Customer
- 09-04-21
A very fun teenage romance horror
Disclaimer: This audiobook was given to me for free at my request and I provided this voluntary review. I have had so much fun reading/listening to this book. The characters are amazing and so lovable. The writing is amazing, it is a very funny read, interesting story, gripping, a little ridiculous, but the set up was wonderfully done. I also like all references that were placed here and there, can totally geek out with the characters. The romance was cute as well. Will definitely revisit this book again. The narration done by Blake Lockheart was excellent. It was so enjoyable. The characters are all very well portrayed, the character's sarcasm and sass are all on point. Everything was very clearly articulated and well paced. Definitely recommend giving the audiobook version a go, it was truly a joy to listen to this.
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