What Does It Feel Like?
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Narrated by:
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Sally Phillips
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Sophie Kinsella
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By:
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Sophie Kinsella
About this listen
A NEW YORK TIMES NOTABLE BOOK • From #1 bestselling author Sophie Kinsella, an unforgettable story—by turns heartbreaking and life-affirming—of a renowned novelist facing a devastating diagnosis and learning to live and love anew.
“The bravest book you’ll read all year.”—Jodi Picoult
“Only Sophie Kinsella can make you laugh like this while she’s got you crying.”—Taylor Jenkins Reid
A PARADE BEST BOOK OF THE YEAR
“What Does It Feel Like? is fiction, but it is my most autobiographical work to date. Eve’s story is my story.”—Sophie Kinsella
Eve is a successful novelist who wakes up one day in a hospital bed with no memory of how she got there. Her husband, never far from her side, explains that she has had an operation to remove the large, malignant tumor growing in her brain.
As Eve learns to walk, talk, and write again—and as she wrestles with her diagnosis, and how and when to explain it to her beloved children—she begins to recall what’s most important to her: long walks with her husband’s hand clasped firmly around her own, family game nights, and always buying that dress when she sees it.
Recounted in brief anecdotes, each one is an attempt to answer the type of impossible questions recognizable to anyone navigating the labyrinth of grief. This short, extraordinary novel is a celebration of life, shot through with warmth and humor—it will both break your heart and put it back together again.
“Why did I write such a personal book? I have always processed my life through writing. Hiding behind my fictional characters, I have always turned my own life into a narrative. It is my version of therapy, maybe. Writing is my happy place, and writing this book, although tough going at times, was immensely satisfying and therapeutic for me.”—Sophie Kinsella
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I love these characters
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Critic reviews
“Soul-stirring, funny, and beautiful. A must-read.”—Zibby Owens, Katie Couric Media
“I laughed. And I cried. And then I thought about the meaning of life. It’s a little jewel of a book.”—#1 New York Times bestselling author Jojo Moyes
“Kinsella is a skillful storyteller. She doesn’t front-load the narrative with exposition, instead parceling out information organically. . . . Most resonant is this book’s bravery—and its emotional honesty.”—The Wall Street Journal
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It’s 1984, and life has changed beyond recognition. Airstrip One, formerly known as Great Britain, is a place where Big Brother is always watching, and nobody can hide. Except, perhaps, for Winston Smith. Whilst working at the Ministry of Truth, rewriting history, he secretly dreams of freedom. And in a world where love and sex are forbidden, where it’s hard to distinguish between friend and foe, he meets Julia and O’Brien and vows to rebel.
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A Revelation!
- By wotsallthisthen on 04-07-24
By: George Orwell, and others
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The Art of War
- By: Sun Tzu
- Narrated by: Aidan Gillen
- Length: 1 hr and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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The 13 chapters of The Art of War, each devoted to one aspect of warfare, were compiled by the high-ranking Chinese military general, strategist, and philosopher Sun-Tzu. In spite of its battlefield specificity, The Art of War has found new life in the modern age, with leaders in fields as wide and far-reaching as world politics, human psychology, and corporate strategy finding valuable insight in its timeworn words.
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The actual book The Art of War, not a commentary
- By Nemo71 on 12-31-19
By: Sun Tzu
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Dead Med
- By: Freida McFadden
- Narrated by: Patricia Santomasso, Scott Merriman
- Length: 10 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
When Heather McKinley dreamed of becoming a doctor, she imagined curing sick kids and sporting pink stethoscopes. She never anticipated the sleepless nights, grueling exams, and endless labs. And she certainly never knew that her medical school earned the nickname Dead Med thanks to the tragic history of students overdosing on illegal drugs. But Heather would never consider doing anything like that. That is, until her longtime boyfriend dumps her, she finds herself failing anatomy, and her world starts to crumble.
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Hmm
- By Morgan Meaux on 08-22-24
By: Freida McFadden
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Starship Troopers
- By: Robert A. Heinlein
- Narrated by: R.C. Bray
- Length: 8 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Johnnie Rico never really intended to join up—and definitely not the infantry. But now that he’s in the thick of it, trying to get through combat training harder than anything he could have imagined, he knows everyone in his unit is one bad move away from buying the farm in the interstellar war the Terran Federation is waging against the Arachnids. Because everyone in the Mobile Infantry fights. And if the training doesn’t kill you, the Bugs are more than ready to finish the job.
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The definitive version!
- By Kristopher G. Hesson on 10-03-24
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Fahrenheit 451
- By: Ray Bradbury
- Narrated by: Tim Robbins
- Length: 5 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
Guy Montag is a fireman. In his world, where television rules and literature is on the brink of extinction, firemen start fires rather than put them out. His job is to destroy the most illegal of commodities, the printed book, along with the houses in which they are hidden. Montag never questions the destruction and ruin his actions produce, returning each day to his bland life and wife, Mildred, who spends all day with her television "family."
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Wish I Hadn't Cliff Noted This in High School
- By Joel on 03-27-17
By: Ray Bradbury
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The Mistake
- By: K. L. Slater
- Narrated by: Lucy Price-Lewis
- Length: 8 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
You think you know the truth about the people you love. But one discovery can change everything.... Eight-year-old Billy goes missing one day, out flying his kite with his sister Rose. Two days later he is found dead. Sixteen years on, Rose still blames herself for Billy's death. How could she have failed to protect her little brother? Rose has never fully recovered from the trauma, and one of the few people she trusts is her neighbour Ronnie, who she has known all her life.
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How much do we really know about the ones we love?
- By T. West on 12-03-17
By: K. L. Slater
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Brain Damage
- By: Freida McFadden
- Narrated by: Megan Tusing
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
As Charly struggles to recover from her brain injury, she begins to realize that the events of that fateful night are trapped in the damaged right side of her brain. Now, she must put the jigsaw pieces together to discover the identity of the man who tried to kill her...before he finishes the job he started.
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Who Else Laughed, Cried, and Shuddered?
- By Jennifer Chichester on 09-16-22
By: Freida McFadden
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Mary Jane
- By: Amy Herzog
- Narrated by: Rachel McAdams, April Matthis, Brenda Wehle, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 16 mins
- Original Recording
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Academy Award nominee Rachel McAdams stars in Mary Jane, a poignant and intimate drama following a single mother’s journey caring for her chronically ill young son. Set in New York City, the play unfolds in two parts—Mary Jane's small Queens apartment and a pediatric hospital. With unflinching honesty and unexpected humor, we witness Mary Jane's tireless devotion, her interactions with medical professionals, and her struggle to maintain her sense of self.
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Amazing performance
- By Andrew Reynolds on 12-28-24
By: Amy Herzog
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Ghost Stories: Stephen Fry's Definitive Collection
- By: Stephen Fry, Washington Irving, M.R. James, and others
- Narrated by: Stephen Fry
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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As the days grow shorter and the temperature drops, Halloween approaches. Come, brave listener, pull up a chair, and spend some time with master storyteller Stephen Fry as he tells us some of his favourite ghost stories of all time, in truly terrifying spatial audio. From the headless horseman of Sleepy Hollow to the tortured spirits of M.R. James, from Edgar Allan Poe’s terrifying tale of a doppelganger to Charlotte Riddell’s Open Door that should definitely stay shut, join Stephen as he tells you some truly terrifying tales.
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Wonderful narration. Mediocre stories.
- By Michael Fuchs on 11-07-23
By: Stephen Fry, and others
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Sasha has had it. She cannot bring herself to respond to another inane, “urgent” email or participate in the corporate employee joyfulness program. She hasn’t seen her friends in months. Sex? Seems like a lot of effort. Even cooking dinner takes far too much planning. Sasha has hit a wall. Armed with good intentions to drink kale smoothies, try yoga, and find peace, she heads to the seaside resort she loved as a child. But it’s the off season, the hotel is in a dilapidated shambles, and she has to share the beach with the only other occupant: a grumpy guy named Finn.
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Classic Kinsella story
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Coming from a huge fan, this one is a miss
- By Cat D on 11-06-20
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The Party Crasher
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It’s been almost two years since Effie’s beloved parents got divorced, destroying the image of the happy, loving childhood she thought she had. Since then, she’s become estranged from her father and embarked on a feud with his hot (and much younger) girlfriend, Krista. And now, more earth-shattering news: They’ve sold Greenoaks, the rambling Victorian country house Effie has always called home.
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Avoid this - poorly written and kind of boring
- By Joan on 10-18-21
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The Undomestic Goddess
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Samantha thrives under pressure. A high-powered London lawyer, all she can concentrate on is taking the next step in her career; eating, sleeping, seeing friends—even taking a breath—will have to wait. But just when she's about to get everything she has ever wanted, Samantha makes a mistake. A fifty-million-pound, career-destroying mistake. Unable to face the consequences, she does the unimaginable and runs away… Catching the first train she can, she finds herself in the countryside, outside a beautiful grand house.
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I already read this book
- By Kimberly Hodges on 10-18-24
By: Sophie Kinsella
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My Not So Perfect Life
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Everywhere Katie Brenner looks, someone else is living the life she longs for, particularly her boss, Demeter Farlowe. Demeter is brilliant and creative, lives with her perfect family in a posh townhouse, and wears the coolest clothes. Katie’s life, meanwhile, is a daily struggle—from her dismal rental to her oddball flatmates to the tense office politics she’s trying to negotiate. No wonder Katie takes refuge in not-quite-true Instagram posts, especially as she's desperate to make her dad proud.
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Ok. Full Disclosure:
- By Wren Recommends on 02-19-17
By: Sophie Kinsella
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I Owe You One
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Fixie Farr has always lived by her father’s motto: “Family first.” And since her dad passed away, leaving his charming housewares store in the hands of his wife and children, Fixie spends all her time picking up the slack from her siblings instead of striking out on her own. The way Fixie sees it, if she doesn’t take care of her father’s legacy, who will?
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Ugh
- By Anonymous User on 02-08-19
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Sasha has had it. She cannot bring herself to respond to another inane, “urgent” email or participate in the corporate employee joyfulness program. She hasn’t seen her friends in months. Sex? Seems like a lot of effort. Even cooking dinner takes far too much planning. Sasha has hit a wall. Armed with good intentions to drink kale smoothies, try yoga, and find peace, she heads to the seaside resort she loved as a child. But it’s the off season, the hotel is in a dilapidated shambles, and she has to share the beach with the only other occupant: a grumpy guy named Finn.
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Classic Kinsella story
- By Mike b. on 10-21-23
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Love Your Life
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Ava thinks love should be found in the real world, not on apps that filter men by height, job, or astrological sign. She believes in feelings, not algorithms. So after a recent breakup and dating app debacle, she decides to put love on hold and escapes to a remote writers' retreat in coastal Italy. At the retreat, she's not allowed to use her real name or reveal any personal information. When the neighboring martial arts retreat is canceled and a few of its attendees join their small writing community, Ava, now going by "Aria", meets "Dutch", a man who seems too good to be true.
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Coming from a huge fan, this one is a miss
- By Cat D on 11-06-20
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It’s been almost two years since Effie’s beloved parents got divorced, destroying the image of the happy, loving childhood she thought she had. Since then, she’s become estranged from her father and embarked on a feud with his hot (and much younger) girlfriend, Krista. And now, more earth-shattering news: They’ve sold Greenoaks, the rambling Victorian country house Effie has always called home.
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Avoid this - poorly written and kind of boring
- By Joan on 10-18-21
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Samantha thrives under pressure. A high-powered London lawyer, all she can concentrate on is taking the next step in her career; eating, sleeping, seeing friends—even taking a breath—will have to wait. But just when she's about to get everything she has ever wanted, Samantha makes a mistake. A fifty-million-pound, career-destroying mistake. Unable to face the consequences, she does the unimaginable and runs away… Catching the first train she can, she finds herself in the countryside, outside a beautiful grand house.
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I already read this book
- By Kimberly Hodges on 10-18-24
By: Sophie Kinsella
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- By: Sophie Kinsella
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Everywhere Katie Brenner looks, someone else is living the life she longs for, particularly her boss, Demeter Farlowe. Demeter is brilliant and creative, lives with her perfect family in a posh townhouse, and wears the coolest clothes. Katie’s life, meanwhile, is a daily struggle—from her dismal rental to her oddball flatmates to the tense office politics she’s trying to negotiate. No wonder Katie takes refuge in not-quite-true Instagram posts, especially as she's desperate to make her dad proud.
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Ok. Full Disclosure:
- By Wren Recommends on 02-19-17
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Fixie Farr has always lived by her father’s motto: “Family first.” And since her dad passed away, leaving his charming housewares store in the hands of his wife and children, Fixie spends all her time picking up the slack from her siblings instead of striking out on her own. The way Fixie sees it, if she doesn’t take care of her father’s legacy, who will?
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Ugh
- By Anonymous User on 02-08-19
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Shopaholic Abroad
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- Narrated by: Nell Hudson
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For Rebecca Bloomwood, life is peachy. She has a job on morning TV, her bank manager is actually being nice to her, and when it comes to spending money, her new motto is Buy Only What You Need—and she's really (sort of) sticking to it. The icing on the brioche is that she's been offered a chance to work in New York.
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Nice to have
- By Bevin B on 03-20-24
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Can You Keep a Secret?
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Emma is like every girl in the world. She has a few little secrets.…until she spills them all to a handsome stranger on a plane. After all, she'll never see him again. But on Monday morning, Emma's office is abuzz about the arrival of Jack Harper, the company's elusive CEO. Suddenly Emma is face-to-face with the stranger from the plane, a man who knows every single humiliating detail about her. Things couldn't possibly get worse... Until they do.
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It is unexpectedly good
- By Vicki on 12-31-24
By: Sophie Kinsella
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I've Got Your Number
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Poppy Wyatt has never felt luckier. She is about to marry her ideal man, Magnus Tavish, but in one afternoon her “happily ever after” begins to fall apart. Not only has she lost her engagement ring in a hotel fire drill but in the panic that follows, her phone is stolen. As she paces shakily around the lobby, she spots an abandoned phone in a trash can. Finders keepers! Now she can leave a number for the hotel to contact her when they find her ring. Perfect!
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Pure fun
- By The Impatient Gardener on 04-14-12
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Wedding Night
- A Novel
- By: Sophie Kinsella
- Narrated by: Jayne Entwistle, Fiona Hardingham, Mark Bramhall
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Lottie just knows that her boyfriend is going to propose during lunch at one of London’s fanciest restaurants. But when his big question involves a trip abroad, not a trip down the aisle, she’s completely crushed. So when Ben, an old flame, calls her out of the blue and reminds Lottie of their pact to get married if they were both still single at 30, she jumps at the chance. No formal dates - just a quick march to the altar and a honeymoon on Ikonos, the sun-drenched Greek island where they first met years ago. Their family and friends are horrified. Fliss, Lottie’s older sister, knows that Lottie can be impulsive - but surely this is her worst decision yet.
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Um... well... that was... hmmm...
- By Wrightaway on 05-30-13
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Finding Audrey
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Overall
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An anxiety disorder disrupts 14-year-old Audrey’s daily life. She has been making slow but steady progress with Dr. Sarah, but when Audrey meets Linus, her brother’s gaming teammate, she is energized. She connects with him. Audrey can talk through her fears with Linus in a way she’s never been able to do with anyone before. As their friendship deepens and her recovery gains momentum, a sweet romantic connection develops, one that helps not just Audrey but also her entire family.
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Don't Believe the Hype
- By MC on 10-04-15
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Twenties Girl
- A Novel
- By: Sophie Kinsella
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- Length: 15 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When the spirit of Lara’s great-aunt Sadie–a feisty, demanding girl with firm ideas about fashion, love, and the right way to dance–mysteriously appears, she has one last request: Lara must find a missing necklace that had been in Sadie’s possession for more than seventy-five years, and Sadie cannot rest without it. Lara, on the other hand, has a number of ongoing distractions. Her best friend and business partner has run off to Goa, her start-up company is floundering, and she’s just been dumped by the “perfect” man.
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My first Kinsella
- By Marie on 05-03-13
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Remember Me?
- By: Sophie Kinsella
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Overall
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When 28-year-old Lexi Smart wakes up in a London hospital, she's in for a big surprise: Her teeth are perfect. Her body is toned. Her handbag is Vuitton. Having survived a car accident - in a Mercedes no less - Lexi has lost a big chunk of her memory, three years to be exact, and she's about to find out just how much things have changed.
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I'm Married?! To Whom?! When?!
- By Joseph R on 01-07-10
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Christmas Shopaholic
- By: Sophie Kinsella
- Narrated by: Nathalie Buscombe
- Length: 12 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Becky still adores the traditions of Christmas: Her parents host, carols play on repeat, her mother pretends she made the Christmas pudding, and the neighbors come ’round for sherry in their terrible holiday sweaters. Things are looking cheerier than ever, until Becky’s parents announce they’re moving to ultra-trendy Shoreditch - unable to resist the draw of craft beer and smashed avocados - and ask Becky if she’ll host this year. What could possibly go wrong?
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I have missed Sophie K books!
- By M Markel on 10-29-19
By: Sophie Kinsella
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The Undomestic Goddess
- By: Sophie Kinsella
- Narrated by: Rosalyn Landor
- Length: 12 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Workaholic attorney Samantha Sweeting has just done the unthinkable. She's made a mistake so huge, it'll wreck any chance of a partnership. Going into utter meltdown, she walks out of her London office, gets on a train, and ends up in the middle of nowhere. Asking for directions at a big, beautiful house, she's mistaken for an interviewee and finds herself being offered a job as housekeeper. Her employers have no idea they've hired a lawyer, and Samantha has no idea how to work the oven. She can't sew on a button, bake a potato, or get the #@%# ironing board to open.
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laugh out loud funny
- By Susan on 05-13-08
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Confessions of a Shopaholic
- By: Sophie Kinsella
- Narrated by: Nell Hudson
- Length: 9 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Becky Bloomwood has a fabulous flat in London’s trendiest neighborhood, a troupe of glamorous socialite friends, and a closet brimming with the season’s must-haves. The only trouble is, she can’t actually afford it—not any of it. Her job writing at Successful Saving magazine not only bores her to tears, it doesn’t pay much at all. And lately Becky’s been chased by dismal letters from the bank—letters with large red sums she can’t bear to read. She tries cutting back. But none of her efforts succeeds. Her only consolation is to buy herself something . . . just a little something.
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Cute
- By Stefanie M. Lane on 08-21-24
By: Sophie Kinsella
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Libby Lost and Found
- By: Stephanie Booth
- Narrated by: Mia Barron
- Length: 10 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Meet Libby Weeks, author of the mega-bestselling fantasy series the Falling Children—written as “F. T. Goldhero” to maintain her privacy. With the final manuscript months overdue to her publisher and rabid fans around the world growing impatient, Libby is diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s. Already suffering from crippling anxiety, Libby’s symptoms quickly accelerate. After she forgets her dog at the park one day—then almost discloses her identity to the journalist who finds him—Libby has to admit it: she needs help finishing the last book.
By: Stephanie Booth
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Can You Keep a Secret?
- By: Sophie Kinsella
- Narrated by: Kate Reading
- Length: 10 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Meet Emma Corrigan, a young woman with a huge heart, an irrepressible spirit, and a few little secrets.
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SO MUCH FUN
- By J. Smith on 04-14-04
By: Sophie Kinsella
What listeners say about What Does It Feel Like?
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- Kathy H
- 11-04-24
Love Sophie Kinsella…
I can only imagine how many people she’s helped by writing such a near-to-real-life novel. She beautifully shares the perspective of how a devastating illness impacts everyone from herself to her spouse and kids to the caregiver! Done with a heaping scoop of humor. Sophie Kinsella is one of a kind.
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- S. Humphreys
- 12-12-24
This is Bravery
Not sure a review is even appropriate here, because this doesn't approach the usual book and judging the story seems unethical. God bless author Sophie Kinsella and her family.
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- KentuckyWoman
- 10-24-24
Cancer is Hard
I appreciated the story and the truth of the author's feelings ... even when she could not speak them out loud... she shared them with us in her writing.
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- Bianca LaJoyce Spencer
- 12-19-24
Short but sweet
I enjoyed listening to this book. It was a change from Jinsella's normal upbeat humor but it was nice and touching. I'm glad she shared her story with the world. Loved it.
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- B. Spinelli
- 11-02-24
Shock
I love Sophie and all of her books. For her to share this was beautiful and terrifying. Praying for her.
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- Amazon Customer
- 11-23-24
Perfect 💗
This book was excellent. It is a heartbreaking and joyful adventure all wrapped up into one. Only Sophie could shift Eve’s perspective while undergoing medical care. I loved this book. Thank you, Sophie, for writing it. Thank you!
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- G.Gardner
- 10-15-24
brave, quick read
Sophie did a great job with this short but brave book. This book is really relatable, sad, and made me think hard about what matters most.
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- Stephanie
- 10-16-24
Thank you...for Everything!
I honestly can think of anything to say...just thank you your you..and every book you have written!
I pray for the very best for you and your family!!
Much love! ❤️
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- Carrie Horn
- 10-16-24
So honest and relatable
I've helped my parents battle cancer 3 times. One survived and one didn't. This book is the most real depiction of what it feels like to go through that situation that I've read. I commend Ms. Kinsella for her strength and bravery in sharing her story and wish her many years of Normal Plus happiness.
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- SashaSays
- 10-23-24
So brave!
I have been a fan of Sophie Kinsella since reading Confessions of a Shopaholic in 2000. I think I have read every single book she has written and loved them all. I was so sad to hear she was ill and it was so brave of her to share her journey with us in this book. Which is it fiction, she called it "my most autobiographical work to date". I will admit to getting choked up quite a few times while listening to the audiobook, in particular the afterword that she herself narrates. I loved the "normal plus" concept the character Eve describes, as well as how important "small pleasures" are. Indeed!
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