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Why Good People Do Bad Things
- Narrated by: Debbie Ford
- Length: 8 hrs and 7 mins
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Publisher's summary
In many ways, these sad stories have become a national obsession. Yet countless other acts of self-destruction and sabotage take place in our families, in our communities, in our circle of friends. Despite good intentions, "good people" do very bad things - often without understanding why.
New York Times best-selling author Debbie Ford guides us into the heart of the duality that unknowingly operates within each one of us: the force that compels us to live by our values, give and receive love, and be a contributing member of the community; and the force that holds us back, sabotages our efforts, and repeatedly steers us toward bad choices.
Ford begins with an examination of what she calls the Beach-Ball Effect - the way in which suppressed emotions eventually rise to the surface - revealing the origins of self-destructive behavior. By describing the never-ending battle between our light and dark sides and then identifying the signposts for potential disaster, Ford helps us understand how we end up damaging the lives we've worked so hard to create. She then breaks new ground by helping us recognize the masks we wear to protect ourselves, including the People Pleaser, the Victim, the Bully, Mister Cool, and the Jokester. Understanding these masks and what they cover up allows us to go beneath the surface, wake up from denial, and become the person we always intended to be.
With Why Good People Do Bad Things Ford has created her most enduring, expansive, and powerful work to date. Providing the tools to unlock the patterns of self-sabotage, Ford ultimately knocks down the facade of the false self and shows us how to heal the split between light and dark and live the authentic life w...
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The idea that good and bad aspects of self have equal worth is a difficult concept to accept. Not so after Ford explains her point of view, using poignant images, a Cherokee story, examples for the worlds of celebrity and politics, and anecdotes from her own life and the lives of others. She goes on to describe shame and self-sabotage and explains how to change the "masks" we've all adopted to survive. Ford reads her own words with the confidence of a teacher who knows the depth of her material. Her voice expresses the neutrality and understanding of a counselor used to awkward subjects. She offers the compassion of friend who can comfort a wounded soul and suggests specific ways to transform internal negatives into hope.
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Bonds That Make Us Free is a groundbreaking book that suggests the remedy for our troubling emotions by addressing their root causes. You'll learn how, in ways we scarcely suspect, we are responsible for feelings like anger, envy, and insecurity that we have blamed on others. Even though we fear to admit this, it is good news. If we produce these emotions, it falls within our power to stop them. But we have to understand our part in them far better than we do, and that is what this remarkable book teaches.
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Helped save our marriage.
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The New Alpha Male
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These days, we hear plenty about what’s wrong with men—like toxic masculinity, patriarchy, mansplaining, and male privilege. But how does a man get it right? “Men are being asked to adapt to our changing world, yet many still want to play by the old rules,” teaches Lance Allred. Now this former NBA star and leadership consultant presents a new game plan for evolving, growing, and succeeding in the modern era: The New Alpha Male.
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Favorite book
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A Radical Awakening lays out a path for women to heal their psychic wounds and prepares them to discover their own powers to help heal others and the planet. Dr. Shefali helps women uncover the purpose that already exists within them and harness the power of authenticity in every area of their lives. The result is an eloquent and inspiring, practical and accessible book, backed with real-life examples and personal stories, that unlocks the extraordinary power necessary to awaken the conscious self.
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Idealistic views without tools
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The Deepest Acceptance
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How can we bring an effortless yes to this moment? How do we stop running from “the mess of life”—our predicaments, our frustrations, even our search for liberation—and start flowing with all of it? With The Deepest Acceptance, Jeff Foster invites us to discover the ocean of who we are: An awareness that has already allowed every wave of emotion and experience to arrive.
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This is one of three books to end the spiritual search
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Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That?
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Like a constant friend, this collection of meditations is a source of strength and reassurance designed to speak to women like you, women in relationships with angry and controlling men. It helps you to digest what is happening a piece at a time, so you can gain clarity, safety, and freedom.
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Just what I needed.
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Until now, we have been taught that forgiveness is good for us and that good people forgive. Dr. Spring, a gifted therapist and the award-winning author of After the Affair, proposes a radical, life-affirming alternative that lets us overcome the corrosive effects of hate and get on with our lives - without forgiving. She also offers a powerful and unconventional model for genuine forgiveness - one that asks as much of the offender as it does of us.
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I'm a Christian
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Today - as repeated attempts to “fix ourselves and our lives” fail - many of us face unprecedented fears about the future, struggle with unspeakable life tragedies, and sink under the belief that certain lives do not matter in our society. Others confront our epidemic of anxiety with fierce resistance, or “the fight to be right”, criticizing anyone and everyone just to end up stuck. In the face of such pervasive human suffering, New York Times best-selling author and legendary life coach Iyanla Vanzant challenges us: What if it’s not them - what if it’s you?
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Difficult to use AUDIOBOOK
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By: Iyanla Vanzant
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Codependent No More
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Is someone else's problem your problem? If, like so many others, you've lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to a loved one’s self-destructive behavior, you may be codependent—and you may find yourself in this book. With personal reflections, exercises, and instructive stories drawn from Beattie’s own life and the lives of those she’s counseled, Codependent No More helps you break old patterns and maintain healthy boundaries, and offers a clear and achievable path to healing, hope, freedom, and happiness.
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great book with unbearable reader
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In Controlling People, best-selling author Patricia Evans tackles the "controlling personality" and reveals how and why these people try to run other people's lives. She also explains the compulsion that makes them continue this behavior - even as they alienate others and often lose those they love. Should you ever find yourself in the thrall of someone close to you, Controlling People is here to give you the wisdom, power, and comfort you need to be a stronger, happier, and more independent person.
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EXTRAORDINARY
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In Codependent No More, Melody Beattie introduced the world to the term codependency. In The New Codependency, she clears up misconceptions, identifies how codependent behavior has changed, and provides a new generation with a road map to wellness.
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Please offer with different narrator
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The Emotionally Destructive Relationship
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Leslie Vernick, counselor and social worker, has witnessed the devastating effects of emotional abuse. Many, including many in the church, have not addressed this form of destruction in families and relationships because it is difficult to talk about. With godly guidance and practical experience, Vernick offers an empathetic approach to recognizing an emotionally destructive relationship and addresses the symptoms and the damage with biblical tools.
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Thank you
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Paul Williams is an alcoholic. Tracey Jackson is not. But together, these two close friends have written Gratitude and Trust, a book designed to apply the principles of the recovery movement to the countless people who are not addicts but nevertheless need effective help with their difficulties and pain. Williams, the award-winning songwriter, actor, and performer, has embraced a traditional alcoholism recovery plan for more than two decades of sobriety.
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Just what I needed!
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What listeners say about Why Good People Do Bad Things
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Meliesa
- 10-06-11
The Shadow Knows
This is a fascinating book! In college, I studied Jung's description of the shadow (the dark side) that is within all of us. But Debbie Ford makes this a contemporary and relevant listen. Each time I hear of another politician, athlete or celebrity who has self-imploded, I think "there's another one for Debbie's book!"
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1 person found this helpful
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- Nausy
- 05-12-12
you will find a great analysis of people and you
Would you consider the audio edition of Why Good People Do Bad Things to be better than the print version?
No both are required in different situation.you need both audio and printed version to get best of it
What did you like best about this story?
revealing inside
Which scene was your favorite?
chapter 11
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
yes
Any additional comments?
it is a wonderful book
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- Drey's Baswell
- 01-05-16
Finally I understand why :)
Would you consider the audio edition of Why Good People Do Bad Things to be better than the print version?
I can listen to it when working and everywhere I go.
What about Debbie Ford’s performance did you like?
She explains so clearly and brilliantly what other authors make it complicated to understand.
What did you learn from Why Good People Do Bad Things that you would use in your daily life?
Help me to question my reaction over what other people express and act over. She make it easy for me to not take other people saying personal and use it wisely. Such a relief...
Any additional comments?
She is an angel, one of the sweetest I had the pleasure to listened to. Thank you Debbie :)
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1 person found this helpful
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- charliegirl
- 10-23-18
amazing
thank you for speaking truth and as ugly as it some time may be i love it. i have begun transforming my life and this book was a step along the journey.
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Overall
- A. Jones
- 04-23-10
Life Changing
This was my first experience with Debbie Ford—and while I now realize she's got a whole host of material (which I am now digging into)—this was very enlightening. The insights I gained will help me make better choices for myself and have also helped me think more kindly about my own self-destructive behavior. My only criticism is that I wish Debbie had selected someone else to read it. She has a slight speech impediment that was distracting, particularly until I got used to it.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Mary
- 01-13-09
Gifted and Inspiring Author
I have been part of the coaching program that Debbie Ford offers. I must say that after years of trying this and trying that, Debbie Ford makes such clear sense allowing her wisdom, and insights to guide me in a way I never thought possible. My coach has been trained with such integrity too... through the programs she requires her coaches to master. This is truly a classy dame with one heck of a classy mind, great insights and a rich and compassionate soul. Thank you Debbie, with all my heart
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- Safia
- 05-25-08
great book
this book is very clear and helpful.
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- Nin
- 01-10-12
interesting the subject, but not the reading
I like the topic of the "shadow", I find it very enlightening in many ways. But this audio did not catch my attention, and my mind wandered easily after listening for a while; perhaps it was the reading, maybe it is too slow ...
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- Christine
- 10-30-08
Understanding shadows
Very interesting and balanced perspective as to why we do what we do and how our shadows (other side of our 'goodness') can come out sideways. It levels the playing field and shows how everyone of us is capable of thinking, feeling and acting out quite negatively when we get out of balance with our selves.
For the people-pleaser type it is a real eye opener finding out that you aren't quite as innocent as you think . . . more like a manipulator and victim with a hidden agenda to get people to like you.
Initially I had a difficult time listening to Ms. Ford's voice, which is rather monotone and nasally, but once I got accustomed to it I found it rather comforting.
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3 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Artsygirl71
- 07-13-09
Insightful
I liked the overall message of this book and found it very informative. I think she hit the nail on the head on why people do bad things. My only criticism is that this book was a bit repetitive and could have been edited down.
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2 people found this helpful