Will Save the Galaxy for Food
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Narrated by:
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Yahtzee Croshaw
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By:
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Yahtzee Croshaw
About this listen
A not-quite epic science fiction adventure about a down-on-his luck galactic pilot caught in a cross-galaxy struggle for survival!
Space travel just isn't what it used to be. With the invention of quantum teleportation, space heroes aren't needed anymore. When one particularly unlucky ex-adventurer masquerades as famous pilot and hate figure Jacques McKeown, he's sucked into an ever-deepening corporate and political intrigue. Between space pirates, adorable deadly creatures, and a missing fortune in royalties, saving the universe was never this difficult!
From the creator of Mogworld and Jam! Benjamin Richard "Yahtzee" Croshaw is a British Australian comedic writer, video game journalist, author, and video game developer. He is perhaps best known for his acerbic video game review series, Zero Punctuation, for The Escapist.
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After decades hunting wanted offworlders throughout the solar system, Corporate Bounty Hunter Malcolm Graves doesn't bother asking questions. So long as the pay is right, he's the man for the job. And he always works alone. But when a high-profile bombing on Earth has Pervenio Corp clamoring for answers, they force him to team up with a strange, cyber-augmented partner. A young man more interested in statistics than instinct. Their assignment: Track down a suspected group of extremists from Titan who will go to any length to free their moon from the grip of Earth's corporations.
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Great Mystery Sci-fi
- By Bryan on 02-08-19
By: Rhett C. Bruno
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Inquisitor
- By: Mitchell Hogan
- Narrated by: Allyson Johnson
- Length: 8 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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To Inquisitor Angel Xia, it was just another corporate killing on a backwater planet. But as the bodies begin to pile up and she finds herself a target, she realizes she's stepped on one toe too many. Barely escaping attempts on her life by powerful agents with seemingly limitless reach and influence, Angel senses even her co-Inquisitors can't be trusted. But as the web tightens, she receives a cryptic message from a computer program claiming to be a little girl in desperate need of her help.
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meh
- By James Cross on 08-17-15
By: Mitchell Hogan
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Critical Dawn
- The Critical Series, Book 1
- By: Darren Wearmouth, Colin F. Barnes
- Narrated by: Luke Daniels
- Length: 10 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Archaeologists Pippa Quinn and Charlie Jackson find advanced technology in undisturbed 16th-century graves. A portent, the discovery precedes thousands of giant sinkholes opening up across the globe as extreme weather threatens the population. Charlie suspects the two are related.
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Younger adult sci-if.
- By William W on 07-22-15
By: Darren Wearmouth, and others
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The Event
- By: Nathan Hystad
- Narrated by: Luke Daniels
- Length: 6 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Cities all around the world reported strange alien vessels descending. Some saw them as the heralds of a new age; others fired everything they had at them. All were taken as the beams lashed down and drew them into the sky. Dean was left behind, seemingly the last man on Earth. A trail of clues left by his dead wife guides Dean on a perilous journey across America and beyond to learn the truth behind the mysterious ships and save humanity from its doom.
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Did not inspire me to get the next book.
- By MD on 12-13-18
By: Nathan Hystad
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The Ark
- Children of a Dead Earth, Book 1
- By: Patrick S. Tomlinson
- Narrated by: Mirron Willis
- Length: 11 hrs and 6 mins
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Humankind has escaped a dying Earth and set out to find a new home among the stars aboard an immense generation ship affectionately named the Ark. Bryan Benson is the Ark's greatest living sports hero, enjoying retirement working as a detective in Avalon, his home module. The hours are good, the work is easy, and the perks can't be beat. But when a crew member goes missing, Bryan is thrust into the center of an ever-expanding web of deception, secrets, and violence.
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Nearly there
- By Michaela on 05-11-16
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Ship Wrecked: Stranded on an Alien World
- By: Mark Wayne McGinnis
- Narrated by: L.J. Ganser
- Length: 8 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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A wicked snowstorm had blown in from the north and the roads were a mess. Recently split from his one-time girlfriend, there was now nothing holding Cameron Decker here in the little backwater mountain town of Larksburg Stand. Time to get back to college, back to Stanford. Seeing a guy knee-deep in slush at the side of the road, he pulled to the curb and waved him over. The guy smacked his head getting in - knocked his watch cap askew. Only then did Cameron notice - noticed that the individual couldn't possibly be human. Cameron decided to help his stranded passenger - a decision he'd soon come to regret. Along with his rust-bucket of a pickup truck, he was soon heading deep into space aboard an interstellar spacecraft. After the vessel crash-landed onto an alien world, he would now have to contend with a murderous droid and a slew of strange alien life forms.
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Exceptional book .. as always
- By Rodnie on 09-20-18
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The Bayern Agenda
- Galactic Cold War, Book 1
- By: Dan Moren
- Narrated by: Victor Bevine
- Length: 10 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Simon Kovalic, top intelligence operative for the Commonwealth of Independent Systems, is on the front line of the burgeoning Cold War with the aggressive Illyrican Empire. He barely escapes his latest mission with a broken arm and vital intel that points to the empire cozying up to the Bayern Corporation: a planet-sized bank. There’s no time to waste, but with Kovalic out of action, his undercover team is handed over to his ex-wife, Lt. Commander Natalie Taylor.
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tedious
- By itinerant on 03-09-19
By: Dan Moren
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Bypass Gemini
- Big Sigma Series, Book 1
- By: Joseph R Lallo
- Narrated by: John Forbes
- Length: 10 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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In a distant future, Trevor "Lex" Alexander was shaping up to be the next great race pilot until a fixed race got him banned from the sport. Reduced to making freelance deliveries, he thinks his life can't get any worse. That's when a package manages to get him mixed up with mobsters, a megacorp, and a mad scientist. Now his life depends on learning what their plans are, and how he can stop them.
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I'm torn over this review.
- By Jim Stark on 05-27-17
By: Joseph R Lallo
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Astro-Nuts
- By: Logan J. Hunder
- Narrated by: Christopher Lane
- Length: 10 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Never meddle with unidentified spying objects...The year is: The Future. Mars and Earth are like that divorced couple who don’t exactly like each other but have at least stopped fighting in public. Floating somewhere in between them, amid all the garbage and Gene Roddenberry’s ashes, a transport vessel called the SS Jefferson is homeward bound. Its crew might have even made it on time for once, too...
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Gave up at 1hr and 33 minutes
- By Moondog on 11-28-19
By: Logan J. Hunder
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Whether he’s underwriting for an overlord, or wearing a pocket protector in a pocket universe, Tom Stranger has just one policy: providing Quality Customer Service. No alien menace is too menacing, no galactic rift too rifty for the multiverse’s most-trusted Interdimensional Insurance Agent in these three brand-new adventures and two classic escapades.
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First half good
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In a world full to bursting with would-be heroes, Jim couldn't be less interested in saving the day. His fireballs fizzle. He's awfully grumpy. Plus, he's been dead for about sixty years. When a renegade necromancer wrenches him from eternal slumber and into a world gone terribly, bizarrely wrong, all Jim wants is to find a way to die properly, once and for all. On his side, he's got a few shambling corpses, an inept thief, and a powerful death wish. But he's up against tough odds....
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A magical serial killer is on the loose, and gelatinous, otherworldly creatures are infesting the English countryside. Which is making life for the Ministry of Occultism difficult, because magic is supposed to be their best kept secret. After centuries in the shadows, the Ministry is forced to unmask, exposing the country's magical history - and magical citizens - to a brave new world of social media, government scrutiny, and public relations.
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I wish I could chain Drew to a desk and make him write for me 24/7... j/k... kind of...
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Even when finding oneself engaged in interstellar war, good form must be observed. Our story is set thousands of years after the Terran Exodus, where two powerful, planet-dominating families - the elegant House Jakabitus and the less refined Hahn Empire - have reached a critical point in their generations-long war. Master Hennik, the Hahn ruler's only son, has been captured, and the disposition of his internment may represent a last and welcome chance for peace.
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The Ember War, book 1: The Earth is doomed. Humanity has a chance. In the near future, an alien probe arrives on Earth with a pivotal mission: to determine if humanity has what it takes to survive the impending invasion by a merciless armada. The probe discovers Marc Ibarra, a young inventor who holds the key to a daring gambit that could save a fraction of Earth's population. Humanity's only chance lies with Ibarra's ability to keep a terrible secret and engineer the planet down the narrow path to survival.
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A COUPLE OF BULLETS AND FOUL LANGUAGE TO DEFEND
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Born to oppression, Siena is an ordinary young woman, until an act of defiance leaves her scarred and marked as a rebel. She's sold to Ero, a fallen Krey with a desperate plan to redeem his once-powerful family. He intends to enhance slaves by altering their genetic code, increasing their value through an illegal experiment.
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I’m so mad!
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When COVID-19 sweeps through New York City, Jamie Gray is stuck as a dead-end driver for food-delivery apps. That is, until Jamie makes a delivery to an old acquaintance, Tom, who works at what he calls “an animal rights organization”. Tom’s team needs a last-minute grunt to handle things on their next field visit. Jamie, eager to do anything, immediately signs on. What Tom doesn't tell Jamie is that the animals his team cares for are not here on Earth. Not our Earth, at at least. In an alternate dimension, dinosaur-like creatures named Kaiju roam a warm and human-free world.
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I'm listening with a permanent smile on my face
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Jack Kernigan is having a bad day...a bad year...a bad life. After being booted out of MIT, he’s back in his Ohio hometown, working for the family business, facing a life of mediocrity. Then one day, out on a delivery, his truck hits...something. Something big...something furry...something invisible. And, it turns out, something not of this Earth. Fate can play funny tricks. Which is why Jack suddenly finds himself the planet’s best hope to unravel a conspiracy of galactic proportions that could spell the end of the human race.
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The least helpful review of Roadkill
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Johnnie Rico never really intended to join up—and definitely not the infantry. But now that he’s in the thick of it, trying to get through combat training harder than anything he could have imagined, he knows everyone in his unit is one bad move away from buying the farm in the interstellar war the Terran Federation is waging against the Arachnids. Because everyone in the Mobile Infantry fights. And if the training doesn’t kill you, the Bugs are more than ready to finish the job.
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The definitive version!
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In a prosperous yet gruesomely violent near future, superhero vigilantes battle thugs whose heads are full of supervillain fantasies. The peace is kept by a team of smooth, well-dressed negotiators called The Men in Fancy Suits. Meanwhile a young girl is caught in the middle and thinks the whole thing is ridiculous. Zoey, a recent college graduate with a worthless degree, makes a reluctant trip into the city after hearing that her estranged con artist father died in a mysterious yet spectacular way.
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This whole city is a butt that farts horror.
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The Galahad, a faster-than-light spacecraft, carries 50 scientists and engineers on a mission to prepare Kepler 452b, Earth's nearest habitable neighbor at 1400 light years away. With Earth no longer habitable and the Mars colony slowly failing, they are humanity's best hope. After 10 years in a failed cryogenic bed - body asleep, mind awake - William Chanokh's torture comes to an end as the fog clears, the hatch opens, and his friend and fellow hacker, Tom, greets him...by stabbing a screwdriver into his heart. This is the first time William dies.
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a rather complex science fiction story
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In a corporate-dominated spacefaring future, planetary missions must be approved and supplied by the Company. Exploratory teams are accompanied by Company-supplied security androids, for their own safety. But in a society where contracts are awarded to the lowest bidder, safety isn’t a primary concern. On a distant planet, a team of scientists are conducting surface tests, shadowed by their Company-supplied ‘droid—a self-aware SecUnit that has hacked its own governor module, and refers to itself (though never out loud) as “Murderbot.”
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Narrators are the opposite of what we want
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A human diplomat creates an interstellar incident when he kills an alien diplomat in a most unusual way. To avoid war, Earth's government must find an equally unusual object: A type of sheep ("The Android's Dream"), used in the alien race's coronation ceremony. To find the sheep, the government turns to Harry Creek, ex-cop, war hero and hacker extraordinaire.
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Covertly flatulent Scifi at it's best!
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A peaceful organization of civilized planets is faced with a threat to their very existence. Desperate to save themselves, they turn for help to the most brutal, backward, violent species in the known galaxy: humans.
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Entertaining at first, disappointing at the end.
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Lock In (Narrated by Wil Wheaton)
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Not too long from today, a new, highly contagious virus makes its way across the globe. Most who get sick experience nothing worse than flu, fever, and headaches. But for the unlucky one percent - and nearly five million souls in the United States alone - the disease causes "Lock In": Victims fully awake and aware, but unable to move or respond to stimulus. The disease affects young, old, rich, poor, people of every color and creed. The world changes to meet the challenge.
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Fun! Things you might want to know:
- By Alexis on 08-29-14
By: John Scalzi
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John Dies at the End
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STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why?
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Vulgar Funny. 4.95 Sale Win.
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By: David Wong
What listeners say about Will Save the Galaxy for Food
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Dubi
- 09-06-17
Tasty Space Opera Satire
What's a space pilot supposed to do when teleportation renders space ships obsolete? Especially one who has no plan and is incapable of formulating one? The answer: inadvertently kidnap the children of the president and a ruthless crime lord, inadvertently take them on a series of unexpected adventures in deep space, inadvertently rescue them, inadvertently restore your reputation as a space hero -- well, you get the picture.
Yahtzee Croshaw, better known as a video game designer and critic, has written several humorous novels, this being the third and most recently published. He succeeds in creating "a satirical sci-fi adventure" as promised, fun and funny, well narrated by he himself. There's not much depth here, but there doesn't need to be as long as fun quotient remains high (and it does).
If you like contemporary humorous SF from the likes of John Scalzi (non-OMW), Ernest Cline (Ready Player One), Dennis Taylor (Bobiverse), Scott Meyer (Magic 2.0), Bob Kroese (Rex Nihilo), et.al., and of course the incomparable Douglas Adams, there's no reason why you wouldn't like this too. That's what I figured when I got it as a Daily Deal without knowing anything else about it, and that's exactly what I got from it.
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8 people found this helpful
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- Matthew
- 04-02-17
Worth the Credit
Any additional comments?
This isn't the best, but it isn't the worst either.
Will Save the Galaxy for Food is one of those books that will make you laugh at times and you probably won't regret paying money for it. But give me a couple weeks and I doubt I will remember a single thing about it. It is kind of a knock off Scalzi book, and I think of Scalzi as consistently entertaining mediocrity (that is a compliment btw).
Yahtzee has some good ideas and he does execute them. It just seems like they aren't fully realized, as if there is something missing.
If a book about a washed up space pilot inspired by Buck Rogers getting shoved into some stupid danger and having to claw his way out sounds good to you, get this book. Same if you want a chuckle and don't go in with high hopes.
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7 people found this helpful
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- Sarah Collins
- 01-29-18
I really enjoyed this book.
the beginning of this book of really wasn't sure where it was going, but I really liked where it went.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Scott W
- 09-16-17
A startlingly deep sci-fi comedy
It feels like a farcical romp, but the characters are pleasantly mature and the storyline never quite goes where you would expect it to. While it seems familiar, it doesn't fall into any tropes.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 01-27-18
Great change from Space Operas
Good break from formulaic space novel about ships with big guns against impossible odds and such.
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3 people found this helpful
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- rob
- 08-21-17
entertaining light-hearted sci-fi
this was a very entertaining book I picked up to go between a couple of more heavier books. This was entertaining and lighthearted and didn't get too much into the science of the Sci-Fi. Sometimes it's a good break to have one of these
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2 people found this helpful
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- D
- 10-14-17
Light and fun
I would love to hear more from Yahtzee Croshaw and his star pilot (Hanson?)--the guy was using a pseudonym for most of the book, so I'm not sure of his real name. This book was funny enough to have me laughing out loud a few times, something I seldom do during audio books, especially the ones that are supposed to be hilarious. I liked the characters and enjoyed their misadventures, and like I said, am looking forward to hearing more from this author.
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1 person found this helpful
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- JEFF HOPPER
- 10-13-17
Entertaining
I enjoyed the characters and pacing. A story that doesn’t take itself too seriously without being silly.
The narration by the author is easy on the ears and nuanced in a way I’m not sure another narrator would be able to accomplish.
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- Brian
- 01-02-18
Clever, fun, and funny
I must say that I am impressed. This story is clever, fun, and funny. It presents a real historic and economic experience in a novel and intriguing setting, but it isn't dry or boring. Far from it. I felt like no time passed at all by the time the ending arrived. I'm sad to see the story end, but glad I was able to enjoy it.
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- Frozengale
- 05-28-17
Another fun satirical comedy by Yahtzee
Fun story, always love Yahtzee's books. Not his best but still fantastic. The characters don't have too much depth or development but they are still fun. If you've enjoyed his other works you'll enjoy this one.
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