Showing results by author "Victor Gischler" in All Categories

In the thrilling conclusion to the A Fire Beneath the Skin trilogy, the enchanted kingdom of Helva faces a nightmarish future of endless bloodshed, and Rina Veraiin—a young warrior-duchess armed with mysterious, magical tattoos—must use her fantastic powers to save her home from eternal war. As her far-flung friends scour Helva for additional tattoos to increase her formidable abilities, Rina reckons with an enigmatic death priest...the one whose contract grants her extraordinary magic but demands an awful price.

Charlie Swift just pumped three .38-caliber bullets into a dead polar bear in his taxidermist girlfriend’s garage. But he’s a gun monkey, and no one can blame him for having an itchy trigger finger. Ever since he drove down the Florida Turnpike with a headless body in the trunk of a Chrysler, then took down four cops, Charlie’s been running hard through the sprawling sleaze of central Florida. And to make matters worse, he’s holding on to some crooked paperwork that a lot of people would like to take off his hands. Now, with his boss disappeared and his friends dropping like flies, Charlie has got his work cut out just to survive.

Rina Veraiin has youth, beauty, and strength. She is a born warrior, able to outride any man, deal death with her fierce blade, and command awesome and mysterious forces granted to her by a set of magical tattoos. Now as the newly minted duchess of Klaar, Rina confronts a menace that threatens her world in a divine conflict that will push her newfound abilities to their limits.

Greymond, the Scattered Kingdom, has been without a king for hundreds of years, a place ruled by squabbling barons and dukes. Occasionally, rumors arise: a king of the old blood has returned to claim his throne. These days, such claims are met with groans and eye-rolls. Pretenders abound . . . and are generally ignored. But scheming powers are plotting, machinations that have been in the works for years. This time . . . enter Merrik Niles.

In the first installment of the A Fire Beneath the Skin trilogy, the city of Klaar has never fallen. No enemy has ever made it across the Long Bridge or penetrated the city's mighty walls. Even when a powerful invading army shows up at the gates, the duke and his daughter, Rina Veraiin, are certain that it poses little threat. But they are cruelly betrayed from within and, in a horrific spasm of violence, the city is brought to its knees.

Edgar Award nominee Victor Gischler “specializes in morbid humor, dark sarcasm, and comic noir, complete with violence and mayhem” ( Library Journal). Go-Go Girls of the Apocalypse picks up 10 years after the end of the world. Former insurance salesman Mortimer Tate leaves his secluded cabin and discovers a desolate landscape complete with cowboys, bandits, and cannibals, where the only traces of civilization are found at Joey Armageddon’s Sassy-a-Go-Go club.

Peyne Erlich’s mission from the king is to learn everything he can about the rival kingdom’s magical ink mage warriors. What he finds is Zayda Yond. Ever since Zayda was sold into servitude by her financially destitute father, her masters have taught her a punishing lesson: erase the past. Collared with an unmovable band of exotic metal, she faces a future of slavery. She’s also become an ink mage, marked with a tattoo that enables her to experience the world as no one else can - a powerful honor, yet one out of her control. Now, Zayda dreams only of escape.

Wallowing in self-pity, Merrik Niles finds himself at the bottom of a bottle of brandy, straining the patience of anyone who might care about him. Shamed into shaping up, Merrik decides his bystanding days are over. He's going to rejoin the war effort against the cruel hunchback currently vying for the throne of Greymond. That's easier said than done. Along the way, Merrik must rescue himself and his companions from shipwreck, form an alliance with a sorceress who previously tried to murder him, infiltrate a city under siege, and concoct an unlikely plan to bring the war to a quick conclusion.

The adventures of Merrick Niles continue in Book Two in the epic Kingdom of Ghosts series by Victor Gischler.

Victor Gischler is a master of the class-act literary spoof, and his work has drawn comparison to that of Douglas Adams, Kurt Vonnegut, and Thomas Pynchon. Now, Gischler turns his attention to werewolves, alchemists, ghosts, witches, and gun-toting Jesuit priests in Vampire a Go-Go, a hilarious romp of spooky, Gothic entertainment. Narrated by a ghost whose spirit is chained to a mysterious castle in Prague, Gischler's latest is full of twists and surprises that will have listeners screaming - and laughing - for more.

David Sparrow is an awesome stay-at-home dad. He gets his kids ready for school while his wife, Amy, commutes to New York City, where she was recently promoted to deputy district attorney. In fact she just inherited a major case: prosecuting crime lord Dante Payne. Meanwhile David is content chatting with the moms at school drop-off, making dinner at night, and doing housework.

Coyote Crossing is a dusty little sh*thole town in western Oklahoma. A sleepy little pit stop for truckers, not a lot going on. So a dead body in the middle of the street at midnight is quite an event. The chief of police wants all hands on deck, so he calls Toby Sawyer to come babysit the body. Toby doesn’t have a lot going for him. Twenty-five, a couple of years of junior college, married to a girl he got pregnant, and living in a trailer on the edge of town. He’s working part time for the police department, hoping the budget comes through and they can put him on full time, so he can get health benefits.

The Edgar-nominated author of Gun Monkeys is back with a thrill-a-minute suspense novel that mixes crime and academia - with hilarious results. Here Victor Gischler draws us into a wild and wicked world, where tenured professors are busy burying bodies, cash-up-front P.I.’s hunt for missing coeds and one desperate street-tough has to decide which he’d rather be: a live poet or a dead criminal.

Mike Foley can never forget the night he tagged along with his brother on a job for the mob that ended in a hail of bullets. Now his brother is dead, Mike’s making wine in Oklahoma, and life is almost as good as it gets when you’ve been hiding out for 40 years. Until his past comes calling. Mike’s nephew Andrew needs to disappear, and he needs to do it yesterday. Hanging with the wrong kind of friends, he’s seen something he shouldn’t have, and now he’s running for his life with an assassin on his trail.

From Victor Gischler, the author behind the high-octane, action-packed thriller Stay, comes No Good Deed, a suspenseful audiobook about how an ordinary man - trying to do the right thing - finds himself in an extraordinary situation. Francis was running late for work when he found the suitcase and the odd card with an email on it. He knew he shouldn't bother but he couldn't resist. Now Francis is dodging bullets and doing his best to stay alive, wishing he had never bothered with that suitcase full of clothes.

The high spot of Teddy Folger's life was the day in 1954 that he got an autographed baseball card from Joe DiMaggio himself. It's been downhill ever since. Which is why he just unloaded his freeloading wife and torched his own comic-book store - in one of the stupidest insurance scams in history. Enter Conner Samson. The down-on-his-luck repo man has just been hired to repossess Teddy's boat. Little does he know there's a baseball card on board that some men are willing to kill for. Thus begins a rip-roaring cross-country odyssey - and with bodies piling up, the squeeze is on for the penultimate piece of Americana.

A collection of connected short stories, all of Private Detective Dean Murphy's supernatural cases that tell the larger story of Dean and his curse! Detective Dean Murphy isn't your normal shamus. Because of a cursed Zippo lighter, Dean finds himself taking cases invloving werewolves, witches, vampires and other things that go bump in the night. A fun, pulpy mashup of the private eye and dark fantasy genres. A good selection for those who enjoyed Gischler's VAMPIRE A GO-GO. Now with a new cover by James, GoOnWrite.com