Agent to the Stars
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Narrated by:
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Wil Wheaton
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By:
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John Scalzi
About this listen
The space-faring Yherajk have come to Earth to meet us and to begin humanity's first interstellar friendship. There's just one problem: They're hideously ugly and they smell like rotting fish. So getting humanity's trust is a challenge. The Yherajk need someone who can help them close the deal. Enter Thomas Stein, who knows something about closing deals. He's one of Hollywood's hottest young agents. But although Stein may have just concluded the biggest deal of his career, it's quite another thing to negotiate for an entire alien race. To earn his percentage this time, he's going to need all the smarts, skills, and wits he can muster.
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The question is, how can you tell the President's brain is missing? And are we sure we need it back?
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Off to Be the Wizard
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It's a simple story. Boy finds proof that reality is a computer program. Boy uses program to manipulate time and space. Boy gets in trouble. Boy flees back in time to Medieval England to live as a wizard while he tries to think of a way to fix things. Boy gets in more trouble. Oh, and boy meets girl at some point.
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Hang in there
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Editorial reviews
Wil Wheaton, a Star Trek: The Next Generation alum, is a canny choice for narrator of this intersection of science fiction and Elmore Leonard-esque Hollywood farce. In addition to being a rather prominent footnote in sci-fi history, Wheaton’s also got a great voice — sonorous, with an inflection similar to a late-night radio DJ who’s bemusedly sharing an anecdote on air between tracks. His voice also carries a hint of that lilt peculiar to many native Angelenos, which comes in handy when he exaggerates it to Valley Girl-proportions to portray starlet Michelle Beck, former cheerleader and current box office draw.
Hollywood agent Tom Stein is the book’s hero, and when the story begins, Michelle is his most important client. That is, until Tom meets Joshua, an extraterrestrial whose alien race hires Tom and his boss, superagent Carl Lupo, to represent them. The Yherajk have decided their best hope for a peaceful first contact between their race and all of humanity is to out themselves via the movies, and they know if they want to make it in Hollywood, they need good representation.
Wheaton’s voicing of Joshua, who has traveled to Earth as the Yherajk’s representative, is another highlight. Joshua, like his kinsmen, looks like a gelatinous blob, gives off a noxious odor, and slithers around amorphously. He’s also incredibly educated when it comes to human pop culture, having logged countless hours watching sitcoms. Wheaton delivers Joshua’s line, “We look like snot. And we smell like dead fish,” in a nasally deadpan that suits a one-liner-delivering alien to a T.
Even when Scalzi veers into semi-philosophical territory — as when he explores why an alien race would choose a Hollywood debut over staging their premiere in Washington — Wheaton keeps the narration moving with his just-right character voices. Look out for the both silly and spot-on sounding Quebecois accent he uses to portray Roland Lanois, an art-house film director with a critical role in the novel, and for his Buddha-like turn as Gwedif, a Yherajk storyteller. —Maggie Frank
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The Unincorporated Man is a provocative social/political/economic novel that takes place in the future, after civilization has fallen into complete economic collapse. This reborn civilization is one in which every individual is incorporated at birth and spends many years trying to attain control over his or her own life by getting a majority of his or her own shares. Life extension has made life very long indeed.
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Hmm
- By CB on 06-15-09
By: Dani Kollin, and others
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The Good Byline
- A Riley Ellison Mystery
- By: Jill Orr
- Narrated by: Sarah Naughton
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Meet Riley Ellison, a smart, quirky, young library assistant who's become known in her hometown of Tuttle Corner, Virginia, as Riley Bless-Her-Heart. Ever since her beloved granddaddy died and her longtime boyfriend broke up with her, Riley has been withdrawing from life. In an effort to rejoin the living, she signs up for an online dating service and tries to reconnect with her childhood best friend, Jordan James, a reporter at the Tuttle Times.
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Entertaining light mystery
- By Elisabeth Carey on 04-13-18
By: Jill Orr
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Short Squeeze
- By: Chris Knopf
- Narrated by: Deanna Hurst
- Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Meet smart-aleck Southampton attorney Jackie Swaitkowski. Her business relies on constant movement of Hamptons' real estate market. After making an odd request to evict his sister-in-law from his home, one of her clients turns up dead. Jackie would have expected that to be the end of it, but an envelope found on the corpse contains an item so unusual that she finds herself working on something bigger, and more dangerous, than real estate.
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Great Listen - Good Series
- By Patricia on 02-15-10
By: Chris Knopf
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A Pedigree to Die For
- A Melanie Travis Mystery
- By: Laurien Berenson
- Narrated by: Jessica Almasy
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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The apparent heart attack that killed kennel owner Max Turnbull has left seven pups in mourning, and his wife Peg suspecting foul play. But the only evidence is their missing prize pooch - a pedigreed poodle named Beau.
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Could not get beyond first chapters
- By DamselflyStudio on 11-07-20
By: Laurien Berenson
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The Unsung Hero
- Troubleshooters, Book 1
- By: Suzanne Brockmann
- Narrated by: Patrick Lawlor, Melanie Ewbank
- Length: 15 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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After a near-fatal head injury, Navy SEAL lieutenant Tom Paoletti catches a glimpse of an international terrorist in his New England hometown. When he calls for help, the Navy dismisses the sighting as injury-induced imaginings. In a last-ditch effort to prevent disaster, Tom creates his own makeshift counterterrorism team, assembling his most loyal officers, two elderly war veterans, a couple of misfit teenagers, and Dr. Kelly Ashton.
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New narration breathes life into this for me
- By Kindle Customer (VH) on 06-21-16
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Dog Dish of Doom
- An Agent to the Paws Mystery
- By: E. J. Copperman
- Narrated by: Christy Romano
- Length: 7 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Kay Powell wants to find that break-out client who will become a star. And she thinks she's found him: His name is Bruno, and he has to be walked three times a day. Kay is the Agent to the Paws, representing showbiz clients who aren't exactly people. In fact: they're dogs. Bruno's humans, Trent and Louise, are pains in the you-know-what, and Les McMaster, the famous director mounting a revival of Annie, might not hire Bruno just because he can't stand them.
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Unfortunately Riddled with Mispronunciations.
- By Maggie May on 02-01-18
By: E. J. Copperman
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On Borrowed Time
- By: David Rosenfelt
- Narrated by: Chris Ensweiler
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
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Richard Kilmer is head over heels in love with Jennifer Ryan, who takes him home to meet her parents, where she accepts his marriage proposal. While visiting, they set out on a nostalgic drive up to Kendrick Falls. On their way, a freak storm rolls in, Richard loses control of his car, and it rolls. When the storm clears in a matter of seconds, Jen is gone. Richard can't find her, and neither can the police who respond to the scene.
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Not enough dogs!
- By Rowan Mangan on 09-18-11
By: David Rosenfelt
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Until Proven Guilty
- J. P. Beaumont Series, Book 1
- By: J. A. Jance
- Narrated by: Gene Engene
- Length: 8 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Lurking in the dark corners of J. P. Beaumont's bizarre case was not just a demented mind obsessed with murder, but secrets so deadly that even a street-tough cop could die guessing.
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Until proven guilty
- By Jean on 04-21-11
By: J. A. Jance
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For Whom The Minivan Rolls
- Aaron Tucker Mystery, Book 1
- By: Jeffrey Cohen
- Narrated by: Damon Abdallah
- Length: 7 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Aaron Tucker isn't a detective. So he's baffled when the richest guy in his New Jersey town insists that Aaron, and Aaron alone, investigate the disappearance of his wife, who has inexplicably vanished from their home in the middle of the night. Funny, down-to-earth, lovable, and resourceful, Aaron Tucker, family man and freelance writer, reluctantly says yes, and continuously wishes he hadn't.
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Funny, Great Narration, Weak Mystery
- By Karen K on 07-16-15
By: Jeffrey Cohen
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The Rabbit Factory
- By: Marshall Karp
- Narrated by: Tom Stechschulte, James Jenner
- Length: 14 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Marshall Karp is an acclaimed playwright known for his witty sense of humor and crackling dialogue. His debut novel The Rabbit Factory stars the irreverent LAPD detective duo of Mike Lomax and Terry Biggs. Dean Lamaar is the architect of an entertainment empire and the creator of iconic characters like Rambunctious Rabbit and McGreedy the Moose.
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Bizarre but engaging mystery.1st-rate performance.
- By MidwestGeek on 12-19-12
By: Marshall Karp
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Baltimore Blues
- Tess Monaghan, Book 1
- By: Laura Lippman
- Narrated by: Deborah Hazlett
- Length: 9 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Unemployed at 29, Tess Monaghan is willing to take any freelance job to pay the rent—including a bit of unorthodox snooping for her rowing buddy, Darryl "Rock" Paxton. In a city where someone is murdered almost every day, attorney Michael Abramowitz's death should be just another statistic. But the slain lawyer's notoriety—and his noontime trysts with Rock's fiancée—make the case front page news...and point to Rock as the likely murderer. But trying to prove her friend's innocence could prove costly to Tess.
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I'm on #8 - This series is almost unique
- By connie on 02-19-12
By: Laura Lippman
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Too Close to Home
- By: Linwood Barclay
- Narrated by: Christopher Lane
- Length: 11 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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In a quiet suburban neighborhood, in the house next door, a family is brutally murdered for no apparent reason. You can't help thinking, "That could have been us". And you start to wonder, "What if we're next?" That's the question Jim and Ellen Cutter are asking, and the answers aren't reassuring.
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Plots and subplots galore
- By shelley on 04-10-14
By: Linwood Barclay
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Working Stiff
- Mattie Winston Mysteries, Book 1
- By: Annelise Ryan
- Narrated by: Jorjeana Marie
- Length: 9 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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When Mattie Winston catches her husband, Dr. David Winston, receiving some very special loving care from RN Karen Owenby, she quits her job and moves out. Mattie's best friend, Izzy, offers her a place to stay and suggests she'd be a natural as deputy coroner. Now, instead of taking patients' pulses, Mattie's weighing their hearts and livers. But Mattie's first homicide call turns out to be for none other than Nurse Karen, and even though she saw her ex in a heated argument with the newly deceased the night before, she refuses to believe David could be a killer.
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Not a cozy mystery
- By Michelle on 09-21-22
By: Annelise Ryan
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When COVID-19 sweeps through New York City, Jamie Gray is stuck as a dead-end driver for food-delivery apps. That is, until Jamie makes a delivery to an old acquaintance, Tom, who works at what he calls “an animal rights organization”. Tom’s team needs a last-minute grunt to handle things on their next field visit. Jamie, eager to do anything, immediately signs on. What Tom doesn't tell Jamie is that the animals his team cares for are not here on Earth. Not our Earth, at at least. In an alternate dimension, dinosaur-like creatures named Kaiju roam a warm and human-free world.
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I'm listening with a permanent smile on my face
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I love Scalzi's writing but not this book
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Small doses of "Scalzian" humor
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Gotta love the classics
- By Skycaptain1883 on 02-15-19
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The Kaiju Preservation Society
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When COVID-19 sweeps through New York City, Jamie Gray is stuck as a dead-end driver for food-delivery apps. That is, until Jamie makes a delivery to an old acquaintance, Tom, who works at what he calls “an animal rights organization”. Tom’s team needs a last-minute grunt to handle things on their next field visit. Jamie, eager to do anything, immediately signs on. What Tom doesn't tell Jamie is that the animals his team cares for are not here on Earth. Not our Earth, at at least. In an alternate dimension, dinosaur-like creatures named Kaiju roam a warm and human-free world.
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I'm listening with a permanent smile on my face
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I love Scalzi's writing but not this book
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The President's Brain Is Missing
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The question is, how can you tell the President's brain is missing? And are we sure we need it back?
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Not my cup of tea (Kelly SAID)
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John Perry did two things on his 75th birthday. First he visited his wife's grave. Then he joined the army. The good news is that humanity finally made it into interstellar space. The bad news is that planets fit to live on are scarce—and alien races willing to fight us for them are common. So: we fight. To defend Earth, and to stake our own claim to planetary real estate. Far from Earth, the war has been going on for decades: brutal, bloody, unyielding. Earth itself is a backwater.
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Fun and Witty Military Sci-Fi
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The B-Team
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Colonial Union Ambassador Ode Abumwe and her team are used to life on the lower end of the diplomatic ladder. But when a high-profile diplomat goes missing, Abumwe and her team are last minute replacements on a mission critical to the Colonial Union’s future. As the team works to pull off their task, CDF Lieutenant Harry Wilson discovers there’s more to the story of the missing diplomats than anyone expected... a secret that could spell war for humanity.
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Obumwe said, Eagan said, Wilson said, Rickney said
- By A Fitts on 01-18-13
By: John Scalzi
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Lock In (Narrated by Amber Benson)
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- Unabridged
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Not too long from today, a new, highly contagious virus makes its way across the globe. Most who get sick experience nothing worse than flu, fever, and headaches. But for the unlucky one percent - and nearly five million souls in the United States alone - the disease causes "Lock In": Victims fully awake and aware, but unable to move or respond to stimulus. The disease affects young, old, rich, poor, people of every color and creed. The world changes to meet the challenge.
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Love Amber's Narration
- By Anthony on 09-11-14
By: John Scalzi
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The Dispatcher
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- Unabridged
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Zachary Quinto - best known for his role as the Nimoy-approved Spock in the recent Star Trek reboot and the menacing, power-stealing serial killer, Sylar, in Heroes - brings his well-earned sci-fi credentials and simmering intensity to this audio-exclusive novella from master storyteller John Scalzi. One day, not long from now, it becomes almost impossible to murder anyone - 999 times out of a thousand, anyone who is intentionally killed comes back. How? We don't know.
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IT'S HARD TO GET MYSTICAL ABOUT YOUR JOB
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By: John Scalzi
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A Very Scalzi Christmas
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New York Times best-selling and Hugo Award-winning author John Scalzi gift-wraps 15 short takes on the holiday season - interviews with holiday notables, "informational" articles about TV specials and Christmas carols, short stories and poems, and even a couple of nods to Thanksgiving and New Year’s - and puts them all into a stocking stuffer-sized package that makes the perfect gift for friends, family, or yourself.
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Very Scalzian indeed!
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By: John Scalzi
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The Collapsing Empire
- The Interdependency, Book 1
- By: John Scalzi
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- Unabridged
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Our universe is ruled by physics, and faster-than-light travel is not possible - until the discovery of The Flow, an extradimensional field we can access at certain points in space-time that transports us to other worlds, around other stars. Humanity flows away from Earth, into space, and in time forgets our home world and creates a new empire, the Interdependency, whose ethos requires that no one human outpost can survive without the others. It's a hedge against interstellar war - and a system of control for the rulers of the empire.
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THE STUPIDITIES OF COURT
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 04-01-17
By: John Scalzi
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When the Moon Hits Your Eye
- By: John Scalzi
- Length: Not Yet Known
- Unabridged
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For some it’s an opportunity. For others it’s a moment to question their faith: In God, in science, in everything. Still others try to keep the world running in the face of absurdity and uncertainty. And then there are the billions looking to the sky and wondering how a thing that was always just there is now... something absolutely impossible.
By: John Scalzi
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Constituent Service
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- Original Recording
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Ashley Perrin is fresh out of college and starting a job as a community liaison for the Third District–the city’s only sector with more alien residents than humans. Ashley’s barely found where the paper clips are kept when she’s beset with constituent complaints–from too much noise at the Annual Lupidian Celebration Parade to a trip-and-fall chicken to a very particular type of alien hornet that threatens the very city itself. And if that’s not terrifying enough, Ashley is next up at the office karaoke night.
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Short and fun!
- By Andrew on 10-04-24
By: John Scalzi
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Slow Time Between the Stars
- The Far Reaches Collection
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Kay Eluvian
- Length: 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Equipped with the entirety of human knowledge, a sentient ship is launched on a last-ditch journey to find a new home for civilization. Trillions of miles. Tens of thousands of years. In the space between, the AI has plenty of time to think about life, the vastness of the universe, everything it was meant to do, and—with a perspective created but not limited by humans—what it should do.
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Lovely story! Lovely performance
- By Lisa on 06-28-23
By: John Scalzi
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Rip-Off!
- By: John Scalzi, Jack Campbell, Mike Resnick, and others
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton, Scott Brick, Christian Rummel, and others
- Length: 11 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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In Rip-Off!, 13 of today’s best and most honored writers of speculative fiction face a challenge even they would be hard-pressed to conceive: Pick your favorite opening line from a classic piece of fiction (or even non-fiction) - then use it as the first sentence of an entirely original short story.
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When is a rip-off not a rip-off?
- By Julie W. Capell on 11-24-13
By: John Scalzi, and others
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Shadow War of the Night Dragons, Book One: The Dead City: Prologue
- A Tor.com Original
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: James MacKenzie
- Length: 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Here is Old Man's War author John Scalzi's sendup of the heroic fantasy genre, now a finalist for the Hugo Award for Best Short Story.
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Excellent Prologue, not short story
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 03-05-13
By: John Scalzi
What listeners say about Agent to the Stars
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Katherine
- 06-19-13
John Scalzi's debut
Originally posted at FanLit.
Tom Stein is a young Hollywood agent who used to think that his clients were hard to handle. That was before Tom’s boss assigned him to represent the most important client any agent has ever had to deal with — the first aliens to contact the human race.
These aliens — the Yherajk — have been watching our TV broadcasts for years, so they know a lot about humans. They are peaceful and want to make a good impression, but they know it’ll be a hard sell. That’s because they look like The Blob, smell like sweaty sneakers, and have some powers that humans are going to find very disturbing. In other words, they seem more like fodder for our horror movies than friends. That’s why they’ve asked Tom Stein’s agency to represent them. So Tom gets to dump his difficult clients off on a junior agent so he can concentrate on figuring out how to give the aliens an image makeover before they’re marketed to the human public.
If you’re already a fan of John Scalzi’s writing, whether it’s his novels or his blog, you’re sure to enjoy Agent to the Stars. It’s non-stop entertainment that’s crackling with that snide humor he’s famous for. The whole Hollywood culture falls victim to his pen as Tom Stein and his competent assistant deal with divas, Hollywood has-beens, the mother of a pampered child star, nosey reporters, rabid fans, and a dumb blonde who wants to move up from playing beach bunny roles to playing a holocaust victim.
Yet even as Scalzi delights in poking fun at Hollywood, at the same time he illustrates its cultural significance and shows us how film can be a powerful tool for education, understanding, and social change. Specifically here he highlights the atrocities that were committed by the Nazis during the Holocaust. A few of these scenes were beautifully poignant.
Agent to the Stars, published in 2005, was John Scalzi’s first novel and it succeeds in every way. Audible Frontiers put it on audio in 2010 and Brilliance Audio released it in CD format last month. Wil Wheaton, who narrates some of Scalzi’s other work, is absolutely perfect here. Scalzi + Wheaton is a terrific combination. If you’re going to read Agent of the Stars, which you should, please please try the audio version!
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Overall
- Bryan
- 04-22-11
Hollywood Agent Represents Stinky Aliens
So what would happen if the aliens came, but instead of nice sleek greys like Close Encounters they stank like the worst thing you could ever imagine? Well, John Scalzi - who has obviously had some experience dealing with Hollywood agents - puts together a wonderful story of how this might unfold.
He has wonderful characters that cover a wide range of possibilities. This is a wonderfully comic romp that pokes fun at many a sacred cow. It also has its very, very somber moments - especially concerning the Holocaust - but is a wonderfully engaging story that you will not want to stop until its completely done.
The narration by Wil Wheaton - best known as Wesley Crusher from Star Trek the Next Generation - is well done. He voices the characters, especially the snarky alien, perfectly.
You will want to explore all the John Scalzi books after hearing this one
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- Scott
- 01-08-11
Agent to the Stars is a fun and fantastic read.
John, Wil - Congratulations to both of you. The audiobook version of Agent to the Stars is one of the best audiobooks I've ever had the pleasure to listen to, out of several hundred, including the Hunger Games & the Harry Potter series. Agent is a fun, breezy tale that's entirely plausible in its non-threatening first contact, and Wil nails the protagonist and other voices in the book.
-Scott Saunders
Somewhere in Iowa.
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- Bradford
- 03-14-13
Meh ... says the SF Fan.
My second Scalzi novel, I was looking forward to seeing what he could do with what is a very intriguing idea ... how would an alien race introduce themselves to 21st Century humanity? The logic of Scalzi's approach is sadly unquestionable. It turns this bland and unexciting novel into a worthwhile read. Scalzi navigates the world of Hollywood stars and agents well, implying to some extent first-hand experience with the industry. His choice of alien species is different and certainly eliminates all stereotypical first contact scenarios right off the bat. Make no mistake, this book is not "Rendezvous with Rama." It's not even in the same solar system as that one. This is a fun little novel about the sad world of Hollywood and just how much the mere appearances of the people there impact our daily perceptions of humanity as a whole. The hidden messages regarding the Holocaust are an interesting twist. However, I think if you really want an alien race to understand humanity and why we're even worth making contact with you don't show them humanity at its worst and then expect them to come down as friends, no matter how popular they get. Scalzi's writing remains an abused victim of overusing "he said," "she said," and an unending supply of adverbs, but at least it didn't kill the overall experience. Need a break from typical first contact novels, give this one a go ... just don't go in with too high of expectations.
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- Brian PDX
- 06-01-12
Another Scalzi and Wheaton winner - great fun
Sometimes its entertaining to listen to a fun novel-a story that makes you laugh because the author has written a book with tongue firmly in cheek and the narrator gets this and performs the novel in just the right way.
The John Scalzi/Wil Wheaton duo doesn't seem to be able to go wrong with this. Scalzi's books frequently are LOL funny Science Fiction-a real rarity-and Wil Wheaton seems to be able to translate this attitude so well.
Agent to the Stars has a "First Encounter" plot, but it's sure not one you've ever read before. These aliens know they have a problem with their appearance and hire a famous Hollywood agent to represent them to the world.
The various incarnations that "Joshua", the alien protagonist goes thru are truly funny--I found some similarity with the Iron Druid novels by Kevin Hearne, especially Oberon his talking dog-Joshua the alien absorbs the dying body and personality of a dog.....amongst others.
It's crazy, complicated at times and just plain funny. Not a shoot 'em up Si Fi if thats what you look for in Si Fi you'll be disappointed, and even though it's very humorous, there is a serious plot underlying the whole slapstick comedy.
Have some fun, download this and "Fuzzy Nation" too, another Scalzi/Wheaton co-op effort...both are well worth your time at the beach or by the pool. And allow yourself to laugh out loud.
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- A. Massey
- 11-02-11
Much better than it should be!
I picked this up for some light reading between big novels (plus it was on sale at Audible). I was very impressed with the quality of the writing. Scalzi could have just written a simple comedy but instead he really developed the characters and worked hard to keep the plot moving forward.
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- Lisa
- 07-11-11
A Brilliant Pairing
The best part of the Audible Frontiers project is that the editors know what makes a great listen. This is not John Scalzi's finest novel - but it's made infinitely better by a pairing with the best possible performer for this work - Wil Wheaton.
Other reviewers are correct - this is just plain fun. But it's also an interesting attempt at commentary on American entertainment culture. I point that out because sometimes folks need an "excuse" to spend a credit. But never mind that - this story is a hoot and this is a great listen.
Fun characters, interesting premise, satisfying conclusion. I consumed it over a weekend, and will likely listen again. I like these people. You will too.
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- St. Joe's amigo
- 07-27-11
fun ride
It was enjoyable and light. A good way to relax and be entertained at the same time. Well written and well narrated.
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- Priscilla
- 01-09-12
Stellar First Novel
Purely entertaining! This is much lighter than Scalzi's later, more mature fare, and solutions to big problems tend to fall into the protagonist's lap, but I found the book irresistible nonetheless. Wil Wheaton's performance is pitch-perfect.
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- Dennis
- 08-26-13
I Was Surprised!
I first started to listen to this book about a year ago. It seemed dumb to me! An Alien that stinks, staying in a fish tank wants to go live in the agents house. I ended the book! About a year later I seen the book again at Audible and it had 4 to 5 stars. I went back to my collection and gave it another try. I'm Glad I did. It was kind of cool in many ways. It hads it's funny moments. It was Very Well Narrated that helped alot. Try it you'll like it.
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