Becoming Nicole
The Transformation of an American Family
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Narrated by:
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Amy Ellis Nutt
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By:
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Amy Ellis Nutt
About this listen
New York Times best seller
The inspiring true story of transgender actor and activist Nicole Maines, whose identical twin brother, Jonas, and ordinary American family join her on an extraordinary journey to understand, nurture, and celebrate the uniqueness in us all.
Nicole appears as TV’s first transgender superhero on CW’s Supergirl
When Wayne and Kelly Maines adopted identical twin boys, they thought their lives were complete. But by the time Jonas and Wyatt were toddlers, confusion over Wyatt’s insistence that he was female began to tear the family apart. In the years that followed, the Maineses came to question their long-held views on gender and identity, to accept Wyatt’s transition to Nicole, and to undergo a wrenching transformation of their own, the effects of which would reverberate through their entire community.
Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist Amy Ellis Nutt spent almost four years reporting this story and tells it with unflinching honesty, intimacy, and empathy. In her hands, Becoming Nicole is more than an account of a courageous girl and her extraordinary family. It’s a powerful portrait of a slowly but surely changing nation, and one that will inspire all of us to see the world with a little more humanity and understanding.
Named one of the 10 Best Books of the Year by People
One of the Best Books of the Year by The New York Times Book Review and Men’s Journal
A Stonewall Honor Book in Nonfiction
Finalist for the Lambda Literary Award for Transgender Nonfiction
“Fascinating and enlightening.” (Cheryl Strayed)
“If you aren’t moved by Becoming Nicole, I’d suggest there’s a lump of dark matter where your heart should be.” (The New York Times)
“Exceptional... ‘Stories move the walls that need to be moved,’ Nicole told her father last year. In telling Nicole’s story and those of her brother and parents luminously, and with great compassion and intelligence, that is exactly what Amy Ellis Nutt has done here.” (The Washington Post)
“A profoundly moving true story about one remarkable family’s evolution.” (People)
“Becoming Nicole is a miracle. It’s the story of a family struggling with - and embracing - a transgender child. But more than that, it’s about accepting one another, and ourselves, in all our messy, contradictory glory.” (Jennifer Finney Boylan, former co-chair of GLAAD and author of She’s Not There: A Life in Two Genders)
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Critic reviews
“Fascinating and enlightening.” (Cheryl Strayed)
“Reading strictly for plot, Becoming Nicole is about a transgender girl who triumphed in a landmark discrimination case.... But the real movement in this book happens internally, in the back caverns of each family member’s heart and mind. Four ordinary and imperfect human beings had to reckon with an exceptional situation, and in so doing also became, in their own modest ways, exceptional.... If you aren’t moved by Becoming Nicole, I’d suggest there’s a lump of dark matter where your heart should be.” (Jennifer Senior, The New York Times)
“Exceptional... ‘Stories move the walls that need to be moved,’ Nicole told her father last year. In telling Nicole’s story and those of her brother and parents luminously, and with great compassion and intelligence, that is exactly what Amy Ellis Nutt has done here.” (The Washington Post)
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Here's an eye-opening examination of the "hookup" culture, seen through the experiences of high-school- and college-age women who confront the hard lessons of dating, love, and sex. Stepp follows three groups of young women and comes away with some disturbing insights. Relationships and romance are seen as messy and time-consuming, and love is postponed or, worse, seen as impossible. Many young women can't handle this, and they're being battered physically and emotionally by the new dating landscape.
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Essential Reading for Parents
- By Elton on 04-19-07
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The Boy Who Loved Too Much
- A True Story of Pathological Friendliness
- By: Jennifer Latson
- Narrated by: Heather Auden
- Length: 10 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
-
Story
What would it be like to see everyone as a friend? Twelve-year-old Eli D'Angelo has a genetic disorder that obliterates social inhibitions, making him irrepressibly friendly, indiscriminately trusting, and unconditionally loving toward everyone he meets. It also makes him enormously vulnerable. Eli lacks the innate skepticism that will help his peers navigate adolescence more safely - and vastly more successfully.
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Williams Syndrome
- By Sharlotte on 09-20-19
By: Jennifer Latson
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Hidden Girl
- The True Story of a Modern-Day Child Slave
- By: Shyima Hall, Lisa Wysocky
- Narrated by: Robin Eller
- Length: 6 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Shyima Hall was born in Egypt on September 29, 1989, the seventh child of desperately poor parents. When she was eight, her parents sold her into slavery. Shyima then moved two hours away to Egypt's capitol city of Cairo to live with a wealthy family and serve them eighteen hours a day, seven days a week. When she was ten, her captors moved to Orange County, California, and smuggled Shyima with them. Two years later, an anonymous call from a neighbor brought about the end of Shyima's servitude - but her journey to true freedom was far from over.
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story
- By Don on 09-26-14
By: Shyima Hall, and others
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Carly's Voice
- Breaking Through Autism
- By: Arthur Fleischmann, Carly Fleischmann
- Narrated by: Patrick Lawlor, Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 11 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
At the age of two, Carly Fleischmann was diagnosed with severe autism and an oral motor condition that prevented her from speaking. Doctors predicted that she would never intellectually develop beyond the abilities of a small child. Although she made some progress after years of intensive behavioral and communication therapy, Carly remained largely unreachable. Then, at age 10, Carly had a breakthrough....
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A peek inside...
- By Yolanda on 08-09-13
By: Arthur Fleischmann, and others
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To the End of June
- The Intimate Life of American Foster Care
- By: Cris Beam
- Narrated by: Susan Ericksen
- Length: 12 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Who are the children of foster care? What, as a country, do we owe them? Cris Beam, a foster mother herself, spent five years immersed in the world of foster care looking into these questions and tracing firsthand stories. The result is To the End of June, an unforgettable portrait that takes us deep inside the lives of foster children in their search for a stable, loving family. Beam shows us the intricacies of growing up in the system - the back-and-forth with agencies, the rootless shuffling between homes, the emotionally charged tug between foster and birth parents.
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Good dissertation
- By Nim on 03-13-19
By: Cris Beam
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The Girls Who Went Away
- The Hidden History of Women Who Surrendered Children for Adoption in the Decades Before Roe v. Wade
- By: Ann Fessler
- Narrated by: Coleen Marlo
- Length: 12 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In this deeply moving and myth-shattering work, Ann Fessler brings out into the open for the first time the astonishing untold history of the million and a half women who surrendered children for adoption due to enormous family and social pressure in the decades before Roe v. Wade.
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Sad but True ... and Helpful
- By Kim Kavanagh on 01-05-17
By: Ann Fessler
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Not Afraid of Life
- My Journey So Far
- By: Bristol Palin, Nancy French
- Narrated by: Bristol Palin
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In this personal memoir, Bristol Palin opens up for the first time ever. She takes listeners behind the scenes, from growing up in Alaska to coming of age amid the media and political frenzy surrounding her mother's political rise; from becoming a single mother while still a teenager to coping as her relationship with the baby's father crumbled publicly. Through all of these ups and downs, Bristol learned how to face her challenges head-on, with courage and grace.
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Forgiveness
- By Dennis on 01-16-16
By: Bristol Palin, and others
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Before I Had the Words
- On Being a Transgender Young Adult
- By: Skylar Kergil
- Narrated by: Skylar Kergil
- Length: 7 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
At the beginning of his physical transition from female to male, then-17-year-old Skylar Kergil posted his first video on YouTube. In the months and years that followed, he recorded weekly update videos about the physical and emotional changes he experienced. Skylar’s openness and positivity attracted thousands of viewers, who followed along as his voice deepened and his body changed shape. Through surgeries and recovery, highs and lows, from high school to college to the real world, Skylar welcomed others on his journey.
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So grateful to help me as grandma
- By Lisa Bridges on 11-11-20
By: Skylar Kergil
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Love That Boy
- What Two Presidents, Eight Road Trips, and My Son Taught Me About a Parent's Expectations
- By: Ron Fournier
- Narrated by: Jonathan Yen
- Length: 6 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Love That Boy is a uniquely personal story about the causes and costs of outsized parental expectations. What we want for our children - popularity, normalcy, achievement, genius - and what they truly need - grit, empathy, character - are explored by National Journal's Ron Fournier, who weaves his extraordinary journey to acceptance around the latest research on childhood development and stories of other loving-but-struggling parents.
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Very enjoyable. Listened to it twice.
- By howharryisharry on 09-05-17
By: Ron Fournier
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Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed
- Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids
- By: Meghan Daum
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller, Jo Anna Perrin
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
One of the main topics of cultural conversation during the last decade was the supposed "fertility crisis" and whether modern women could figure out a way to have it all - a successful, demanding career and the required 2.3 children - before their biological clocks stopped ticking. Now, however, conversation has turned to whether it's necessary to have it all (see Anne-Marie Slaughter) or, perhaps more controversial, whether children are really a requirement for a fulfilling life.
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Am I the only sane childfree woman in here?
- By J. Malouin on 09-29-15
By: Meghan Daum
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The Unspeakable
- And Other Subjects of Discussion
- By: Meghan Daum
- Narrated by: Meghan Daum
- Length: 6 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It's a report tempered by hard times. In "Matricide", Daum unflinchingly describes a parent's death and the uncomfortable emotions it provokes; and in "Diary of a Coma" she relates her own journey to the twilight of the mind. But Daum also operates in a comic register. With perfect precision, she reveals the absurdities of the marriage-industrial complex, of the New Age dating market, and of the peculiar habits of the young and digital.
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Complaining about her dead mom.
- By Erik Hermansen on 11-23-14
By: Meghan Daum
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Bringing Up Girls
- Practical Advice and Encouragement for Those Shaping the Next Generation of Women
- By: James C. Dobson
- Narrated by: James C. Dobson
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Based on extensive research, and handled with Dr. Dobson's trademark down-to-earth approach, Bringing Up Girls will equip parents like you to face the challenges of raising your daughters to become healthy, happy, and successful women who overcome challenges specific to girls and women today and who ultimately excel in life.
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Solid concepts, poor presentation
- By honuhunter on 12-06-18
By: James C. Dobson
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Beyond Magenta
- Transgender Teens Speak Out
- By: Susan Kuklin
- Narrated by: Tanya Eby, Nick Podehl, Todd Haberkorn, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Author and photographer Susan Kuklin met and interviewed six transgender or gender-neutral young adults and used her considerable skills to represent them thoughtfully and respectfully before, during, and after their personal acknowledgment of gender preference. Each honest discussion and disclosure, whether joyful or heartbreaking, is completely different from the other because of family dynamics, living situations, gender, and the transition these teens make in recognition of their true selves.
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More books like these, please!
- By S. Brown on 02-11-15
By: Susan Kuklin
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Schuyler's Monster
- A Father's Journey with His Wordless Daughter
- By: Robert Rummel-Hudson
- Narrated by: Johnathan McClain
- Length: 9 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
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Performance
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Story
When Schuyler Rummel-Hudson was 18 months old, a question about her lack of speech by her pediatrician set in motion a journey that continues today. When she was diagnosed with bilateral perisylvian polymicrogyria (an extremely rare neurological disorder), her parents were given a name for the monster that had been stalking them from doctor to doctor, and from despair to hope, and back again.
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Must-read for medical parents & those who ❤them
- By Kelly A. Wolske on 05-23-18
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Americanized
- Rebel Without a Green Card
- By: Sara Saedi
- Narrated by: Lameece Issaq
- Length: 5 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
At 13, bright-eyed straight-A student Sara Saedi uncovered a terrible family secret: She was breaking the law simply by living in the United States. Only two years old when her parents fled Iran, she didn't learn of her undocumented status until her older sister wanted to apply for an after-school job but couldn't because she didn't have a Social Security number. Fear of deportation kept Sara up at night, but it didn't keep her from being a teenager.
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Corny Cheesy
- By Mina00 on 09-06-18
By: Sara Saedi
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Her Gift to Him: An LGBT, First Time, Feminization, New Adult, Transgender Romance
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It’s Christmas break. Gorgeous Piper loves nerdy Jake’s passion for buying her clothes, but her intuition tells her he does it not only because he loves her so much but also because of his hidden desire to wear them himself. She buys her love everything needed for crossdressing and transforming Jake into Jackie, her girlfriend. That afternoon, she enlightens him in the nuances of presenting his feminine side and immerses him in the pleasures of catering to his feminine persona.
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Overall
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Performance
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Gender identity ideology is about more than Twitter storms and using the right pronouns. In just 10 years, laws, company policies, school and university curricula, sport, medical protocols, and the media have been reshaped to privilege self-declared gender identity over biological sex. People are being shamed and silenced for attempting to understand the consequences of redefining "man" and "woman". While compassion for transgender lives is well-intentioned, it is stifling much-needed inquiry into the significance of our bodies.
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rational, clear criticism of trans ideology
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“Can I kiss you?” It was two months before the world premiere of Juno, and Elliot Page was in his first ever queer bar. The hot summer air hung heavy around him as he looked at her. And then it happened. In front of everyone. A previously unfathomable experience. Here he was on the precipice of discovering himself as a queer person, as a trans person. Getting closer to his desires, his dreams, himself, without the repression he’d carried for so long. But for Elliot, two steps forward had always come with one step back.
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Overall
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Performance
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Abby Stein was raised in a Hasidic Jewish community in Brooklyn, isolated in a culture that lives according to the laws and practices of 18th century Eastern Europe, speaking only Yiddish and Hebrew and shunning modern life. Stein was born as the first son in a dynastic rabbinical family, poised to become a leader of the next generation of Hasidic Jews. But Abby felt certain at a young age that she was a girl. She orchestrated a personal exodus from ultra-Orthodox manhood to mainstream femininity - a radical choice that forced her to leave her home, her family, her way of life.
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Hey, I'm Jamie, a 29-year-old trans guy from the UK. I've been transitioning for 12 years now after realising I was trans (by accident!) at sixteen years old. I knew I was a boy since the age of four, but realised whilst growing up that I was different. It was only in my teens that I found the words to express who I was and what I needed to do. Since then, I've been on testosterone for more than a decade - I know, I can't believe it either - I've also had top and bottom surgery and legally changed my sex, so I know a few things about the transitioning process and being trans!
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Amazing
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Transitions of the Heart
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Transitions of the Heart is the first collection to ever invite mothers of transgender and gender variant children of all ages to tell their own stories about their child’s gender transition. Often transitioning socially and emotionally alongside their child but rarely given a voice in the experience, mothers hold the key to familial and societal understanding of gender difference.
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Heartfelt, Well-Written, and Moving
- By Susie on 01-04-13
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Transgender History, Second Edition
- The Roots of Today's Revolution
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Covering American transgender history from the mid-20th century to today, Transgender History takes a chronological approach to the subject of transgender history, with each chapter covering major movements, writings, and events.
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something for everyone to learn
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He/She/They
- How We Talk About Gender and Why It Matters
- By: Schuyler Bailar
- Narrated by: Schuyler Bailar
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- Unabridged
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Overall
-
Performance
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Story
Anti-transgender legislation is being introduced in state governments around the United States in record-breaking numbers. Trans people are under attack in sports, healthcare, school curriculum, bathrooms, bars, and nearly every walk of life. He/She/They compassionately addresses fundamental topics, from why being transgender is not a choice and why pronouns are important, to more complex issues including how gender-affirming healthcare can be lifesaving.
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Perspective, educational, raw
- By Cade on 02-28-24
By: Schuyler Bailar
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This Is How It Always Is
- A Novel
- By: Laurie Frankel
- Narrated by: Gabra Zackman
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When Rosie and Penn and their four boys welcome the newest member of their family, no one is surprised it's another baby boy. At least their large, loving, chaotic family knows what to expect. But Claude is not like his brothers. One day he puts on a dress and refuses to take it off. He wants to bring a purse to kindergarten. He wants hair long enough to sit on. When he grows up, Claude says, he wants to be a girl.
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Story mirrors our life -- to a point -- spoilers
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By: Laurie Frankel
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Being Jazz
- My Life as a (Transgender) Teen
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Story
Jazz Jennings is one of the youngest and most prominent voices in the national discussion about gender identity. At the age of five, Jazz transitioned to life as a girl, with the support of her parents. A year later her parents allowed her to share her incredible journey in her first Barbara Walters interview, aired at a time when the public was much less knowledgeable about or accepting of the transgender community.
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Powerful and Enlightening.
- By Skye on 06-21-16
By: Jazz Jennings
What listeners say about Becoming Nicole
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Deborah Flynn
- 05-13-22
Everyone should know this story
Nicole’s story is so important to hear and in this book it is very personally told. It creates compassion and understanding of people who are transgendered, as well as family members who support them. The book shares the personal experience of the subjects as well as some scientific and biological information that is explained in a easily understood language. It was easy and enjoyable to listen to.
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- Nina Zimbelman
- 07-23-16
Beautiful understanding of a family's journey
What made the experience of listening to Becoming Nicole the most enjoyable?
This book is beautifully done. It really captures the story of the child who knows at an extremely early age who he/she is and the complexity of parents trying to understand the situation. And telling the story, it gives an in-depth and upfront understanding of the transgender experience. I found myself rooting for Nicole and her family and hoping that this will turn out to be a happy ending. I was not disappointed. Thank you so much Nicole and the entire family for being willing to share such an important, in depth story.
Who was your favorite character and why?
My favorite character was Nicole because of her courage and certainty of who she was
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
A child's incredible courage
Any additional comments?
I wish only the highest for this amazing family
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- Darryl H.
- 05-07-18
great book
this book was very interesting and at times I couldn't stop listening to it. it was well presented.
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-05-21
Moving, enlightening, timely.
This book will help readers understand more about one of the most pressing issues in society today and expand their ideas about the human experience.
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- Susan Leonard
- 03-02-23
Powerful and Insightful!
I am reminded once more of the power of personal story to build bridges that fact alone cannot. For anyone curious or confused or conflicted about what it means to be transgender, this book is a must read! It will open your eyes…and your heart!
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- JS - SDS
- 12-24-23
An all around great book
I really enjoyed and recommend this book. The balance between personal story inserted with scientific material is excellent. An important read which will bring more tolerance and understanding to this world.
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- Humble Opinion
- 02-02-16
Very informative on a sensitive topic.
Well written combining the clinical information with a personal story. A paradigm shift in perception of what constitutes being male or female.
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- Anonymous User
- 10-23-21
great for parents
I enjoy the actress and found her story compelling. I work with youth and parents and unfortunately have a few parents whose resistance to reality is harming their children. The science but most of all humanity of this story could reach a few people.
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- Lynn T
- 01-20-18
Finding Peace
Thank You for opening my eyes and heart even more and helping me realize I am not alone in my sons journey. This is who my child is and I love him with all my being. Very informative book brought about things I had not thought of yet.
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- Amy
- 05-21-16
A very special and highly informative read
Where to begin? This book and the Mains family are both extraordinary! For anyone looking to gain insight into gender issues today. I've always believed that the source of bullying children are their parents (or grandparents!) and no where is this more apparent then on the gender divide. There is so much more progress to be made in the realm of educating the masses regarding gender, sexuality and choice or lack thereof. This book takes the reader into the reality and pain in transcending gender bias and reaching harmony for our suffering children who are on the front line of prejudice and intolerance. I am as proud and unabashedly admiring of the Mains family as much as I am ashamed of those Americans who actually believe they are created in the image of God to the exclusion of others. It shocks me to my core. The book goes a long way in bringing the issue of freedom for our beloved LGBTQ community of children. They are ALL our children!
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