
It Gets Better . . . Except When It Gets Worse
And Other Unsolicited Truths I Wish Someone Had Told Me
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Narrated by:
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Nicole Maines
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By:
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Nicole Maines
About this listen
NATIONAL BESTSELLER • The irreverent and candid coming-of-age memoir of Nicole Maines, trailblazing trans actress, activist—and sometimes someone who’s just existing, which is actually pretty hard!
Nicole Maines knows a little something about “happily ever after”—not just because she’s a self-professed expert in the Disney princess canon, but because she’s lived it. After coming out at an early age, her family had not only to educate themselves, but also those around them as they fought and won a landmark court case in the state of Maine before she graduated high school. She made it into college, got the guy, and finally had The Surgery™. She achieved her lifelong goal of becoming an actress when she landed a major role in the CW’s Supergirl, playing television’s very first live-action transgender superhero.
Cue sappy music and sunsets, because we’ve got ourselves a happy ending, right?
Ha! As if.
For the first time, in her own words, Nicole tells the story of her journey from childhood in rural Maine to the spotlights of Hollywood, sharing the lessons she’s learned along the way. With clever wit and unflinching honesty, she tackles some of the most insidious messaging absorbed by queer kids and all young women, from the idea that any one thing can (or should) ever really “fix” you, to wondering what’s wrong with you when things don’t always feel better, and reminding us that, sometimes, a happy ending is only the beginning of the story.
©2024 Nicole Maines (P)2024 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“[Nicole Maines’s] singular voice powers the book; she is open and humorous and a bit sly. . . . This is the memoir of a still young and confident woman, with more accomplishments yet to come.”—Kirkus Reviews
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-
Story
Covering American transgender history from the mid-20th century to today, Transgender History takes a chronological approach to the subject of transgender history, with each chapter covering major movements, writings, and events.
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something for everyone to learn
- By Nick G on 03-12-19
By: Susan Stryker
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She's Not There
- A Life in Two Genders
- By: Jennifer Finney Boylan
- Narrated by: Jennifer Finney Boylan
- Length: 11 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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The provocative best seller She's Not There is the winning, utterly surprising story of a person changing genders. By turns hilarious and deeply moving, Jennifer Finney Boylan explores the territory that lies between men and women, examines changing friendships, and rejoices in the redeeming power of family. Told in Boylan's fresh voice, She's Not There is about a person bearing and finally revealing a complex secret.
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Inspiring novel of MTF transition
- By Jamie on 03-01-18
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The Transgender Issue
- Trans Justice Is Justice for All
- By: Shon Faye
- Narrated by: Shon Faye
- Length: 9 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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In this brilliant introduction to trans politics, journalist Shon Faye gives an incisive overview of systemic transphobia and argues that the struggle for trans rights is necessary to any struggle for social justice. So often, Faye argues, trans people are understood as a "side issue," the subjects of a toxic and increasingly polarized debate which generates reliable controversy for newspapers and talk shows. This media frenzy conceals a simple fact: that we are having the wrong conversation, a conversation in which trans people themselves are reduced to a talking point and denied a voice.
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Perfect
- By Genect on 04-10-24
By: Shon Faye
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Whipping Girl
- A Transsexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity
- By: Julia Serano
- Narrated by: Julia Serano
- Length: 11 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Julia Serano shares her experiences and insights - both pre- and post-transition - to reveal the ways in which fear, suspicion, and dismissiveness toward femininity shape our societal attitudes toward trans women, as well as gender and sexuality as a whole. Serano's well-honed arguments and pioneering advocacy stem from her ability to bridge the gap between the often-disparate biological and social perspectives on gender. In this provocative manifesto, she exposes how deep-rooted the cultural belief is that femininity is frivolous, weak, and passive.
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Beautiful
- By Tamika on 11-05-16
By: Julia Serano
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Cleavage
- Men, Women, and the Space Between Us
- By: Jennifer Finney Boylan
- Narrated by: Gabra Zackman, Jennifer Finney Boylan
- Length: 8 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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What is the difference between men and women? Jennifer Finney Boylan, bestselling author of She’s Not There and co-author of Mad Honey with Jodi Picoult, examines the divisions—as well as the common ground—between the genders, and reflects on her own experiences, both difficult and joyful, as a transgender American.
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Someday there may be no gender
- By stacey a shapiro on 03-26-25
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Becoming Eve
- My Journey from Ultra-Orthodox Rabbi to Transgender Woman
- By: Abby Stein
- Narrated by: Abby Stein
- Length: 7 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Abby Stein was raised in a Hasidic Jewish community in Brooklyn, isolated in a culture that lives according to the laws and practices of 18th century Eastern Europe, speaking only Yiddish and Hebrew and shunning modern life. Stein was born as the first son in a dynastic rabbinical family, poised to become a leader of the next generation of Hasidic Jews. But Abby felt certain at a young age that she was a girl. She orchestrated a personal exodus from ultra-Orthodox manhood to mainstream femininity - a radical choice that forced her to leave her home, her family, her way of life.
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Incredible
- By Amazon Customer on 05-01-20
By: Abby Stein
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Gender Queer
- A Memoir
- By: Maia Kobabe
- Narrated by: Maia Kobabe, Trini Alvarado, Stephen Graybill, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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In 2014, Maia Kobabe, who uses e/em/eir pronouns, thought that a comic of reading statistics would be the last autobiographical comic e would ever write. At the time, it was the only thing e felt comfortable with strangers knowing about em. Now, Gender Queer is here. Maia’s intensely cathartic autobiography charts eir journey of self-identity, which includes the mortification and confusion of adolescent crushes, grappling with how to come out to family and society, bonding with friends over erotic gay fanfiction, and facing the trauma and fundamental violation of pap smears.
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For the first time in 30 years, I heard things out loud that were said in my brain as a child.
- By Anonymous User on 06-09-24
By: Maia Kobabe
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Gender Euphoria
- Stories of Joy from Trans, Non-Binary and Intersex Writers
- By: Laura Kate Dale - editor
- Narrated by: Laura Kate Dale
- Length: 8 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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So often the stories shared by trans people about their transition center on gender dysphoria: a feeling of deep discomfort with their birth-assigned gender, and a powerful catalyst for coming out or transitioning. But for many non-cisgender people, it's gender euphoria that pushes forward their transition: the joy the first time a parent calls them by their new chosen name, the first time they have the confidence to cut their hair short, the first time they truly embrace themself.
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simply life changing
- By Grant Vargas on 06-01-24
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If I Was Your Girl
- By: Meredith Russo
- Narrated by: Samia Mounts
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
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Amanda Hardy is the new girl in school. Like anyone else, all she wants is to make friends and fit in. But Amanda is keeping a secret, and she's determined not to get too close to anyone. But when she meets sweet, easygoing Grant, Amanda can't help but start to let him into her life. As they spend more time together, she realizes just how much she is losing by guarding her heart. She finds herself yearning to share with Grant everything about herself, including her past.
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The middle
- By Kirah on 06-02-16
By: Meredith Russo
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A Clinician's Guide to Gender-Affirming Care
- Working with Transgender and Gender Nonconforming Clients
- By: Sand C. Chang PhD, Anneliese A. Singh PhD LPC, Lore M. Dickey PhD
- Narrated by: Coleen Marlo
- Length: 11 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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This book provides up-to-date information on language, etiquette, and appropriate communication and conduct in treating TGNC clients, and discusses the history, cultural context, and ethical and legal issues that can arise in working with gender-diverse individuals in a clinical setting. You'll also find information about informed consent approaches that call for a shift in the role of the mental health provider in the position of assessment and referral for the purposes of gender-affirming medical care (such as hormones, surgery, and other procedures).
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Highly Informative
- By Siz2741 on 12-03-21
By: Sand C. Chang PhD, and others
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Understanding Gender Dysphoria
- Navigating Transgender Issues in a Changing Culture
- By: Mark A. Yarhouse
- Narrated by: Sebastian Crook
- Length: 6 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Few topics are more contested today than gender identity. Complex issues like gender dysphoria are reduced to slogans and sound bites. And while the war rages over language, institutions, and political allegiances, transgender individuals are the ones who end up being the casualties. Mark Yarhouse, an expert in sexual identity and therapy, challenges the church to rise above the political hostilities and listen to people's stories. Yarhouse offers a Christian perspective on transgender issues that eschews simplistic answers and appreciates the psychological and theological complexity.
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Slow as slow can be
- By Cameron on 02-27-25
By: Mark A. Yarhouse
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Not My Father's Son: A Memoir
- By: Alan Cumming
- Narrated by: Alan Cumming
- Length: 6 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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With ribald humor, wit, and incredible insight, Alan seamlessly moves back and forth in time, integrating stories from his childhood in Scotland and his experiences today as the celebrated actor of film, television, and stage. At times suspenseful, at times deeply moving, but always incredibly brave and honest, Not My Father's Son is a powerful story of embracing the best aspects of the past and triumphantly pushing the darkness aside.
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The Best Part of Saturday
- By George Knight on 12-16-14
By: Alan Cumming
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Being Jazz
- My Life as a (Transgender) Teen
- By: Jazz Jennings
- Narrated by: Jazz Jennings
- Length: 4 hrs
- Unabridged
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Jazz Jennings is one of the youngest and most prominent voices in the national discussion about gender identity. At the age of five, Jazz transitioned to life as a girl, with the support of her parents. A year later her parents allowed her to share her incredible journey in her first Barbara Walters interview, aired at a time when the public was much less knowledgeable about or accepting of the transgender community.
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Powerful and Enlightening.
- By Skye on 06-21-16
By: Jazz Jennings
What listeners say about It Gets Better . . . Except When It Gets Worse
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Melanie Rule
- 03-08-25
Everyone should read this book!
I hardly ever write reviews but this book deserves to be spread across the country especially in this crazy time. As a mom of a trans son I wish more people understood that my child is just trying to live their authentic and best life. Nicole’s book beautifully showcases how she knew who she was at a young age. And she is hilarious at the same time!
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- Anonymous User
- 11-29-24
I laughed, I cried, I started watching Supergirl
Nicole tells her story in such an open/honest way and manages to keep you entertained the entire time. Seriously, there was never a dull moment!
I love how she handles things with witty amusement, while also acknowledging the often harsher aspects of her lived experience as a trans woman. Let’s just say I’m a fan now.
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- Abigail Boen
- 11-07-24
Navigating Dysphoria and Healing: Nicole's Transgender Journey with heart and humor.
A relatable narrative of growing up as a trans girl, vividly capturing the early childhood struggles with dysphoria. I deeply resonate with the journey toward gender-affirming surgery—though I was fortunate to avoid complications, I vividly recall the long, painful healing process and the emotional rollercoaster post-op. My heartfelt thanks to Nicole for sharing her deeply personal story in such a visceral, humorous, and entertaining manner. Thank you, Nicole ❤️
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- Lauren S.
- 12-23-24
Tremendous on every level
Maines's personal story is deeply compelling presented with a level of vulnerability and self-awareness that I wish more people in this world possessed. She also deftly weaves into her narrative observations and insights about trans history, the trans community, and attacks on trans people and trans rights that, unfortunately, resonate deeply (and increasingly) with the current moment. Completing the package is Maines's delightful narration, which hits perfect notes of sarcastic, self-deprecating, silly, and sobering. Listening to this book is a transformative experience that you owe to give yourself and your loved ones.
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- VKG2020
- 12-04-24
Intimate and Authentic
I enjoyed this book a lot and it being read by the author herself was a big selling point to me. I was inspired by her bravery and authenticity in discussing the details of her life in such a candid manner. I feel like maybe I absorbed just a bit of that courage myself and I appreciate it a lot.
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- PamelaLeigh61
- 01-20-25
Never Dull Your Shine
What an inspiring story. When we give our children the space and love to be who they know they are - the world becomes a better place. If as a parent who cannot or will not love your child unconditionally- then please do not have children. Children who are loved and supported (not spoiled, there is a difference) can then grow up to be loving and supportive adults. It is a cycle we should all strive to be a part of. Be kind. You never know what someone is going through.
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- Richard James McMullen
- 01-01-25
Disappointed
There’s two types of transgender people the first ones go through transition to live their lives. The others look for spotlight and specialness. This book was very disappointing It was hard to listen to through the ignorance of using cuss words consistently . This book reminds me of that kid who thinks they know it all.
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