Preview
  • Everything Is Awful

  • And Other Observations
  • By: Matt Bellassai
  • Narrated by: Matt Bellassai
  • Length: 6 hrs and 16 mins
  • 4.3 out of 5 stars (1,042 ratings)

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Everything Is Awful

By: Matt Bellassai
Narrated by: Matt Bellassai
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Publisher's summary

From the break-out star of BuzzFeed and the People's Choice Award-winning comedian behind the web series Whine About It and To Be Honest comes a collection of hilariously anguished essays chronicling awful moments from his life so far, the humiliations of being an adult, and other little indignities.

Matt Bellassai has no idea what he's doing. Well, to be fair, he did become semi-Internet famous by getting drunk at work, making him a socially-acceptable - nay - professional alcoholic. He's got some things figured out. But the rest is all just a terrible, disgusting mess.

This is Matt's book. Just to clarify, though, it is absolutely not a memoir; Matt is far too young to have done anything worth remembering (though he did win an actual People's Choice Award for his BuzzFeed web series, Whine About It, which is pretty good, if you ask his mother). This is also most certainly not a book of advice; he is too woefully ill-prepared for life to offer anything in the way of counsel (though that won't stop him from talking). Call this a collection of awful moments that led to his grumbling, blundering adulthood - a chronicle of little indignities that, when taken together, amount to a life of hilarious anguish.

With keen wit and plenty of self-deprecation, Matt reveals how hard it is to shed his past as the Midwest's biggest nerd, that one time a taquito nearly murdered him at his brother's surprise birthday party, and the time he came out to his friends and family (the closet was a bit messy). Matt also wrestles with the humiliations of adulthood, like giving up on love in New York City, living alone with no one to heat his microwave dinners, and combating the inner voice that tells him to say aloud all the things the rest of us are smart enough to keep to ourselves.

You probably don't need this book, but, let's be honest - you do. Since you're already here, you might as well pull up a chair, grab your glass(es) of wine, and enjoy.

©2017 Matt Bellassai (P)2017 Audible, Inc.
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What listeners say about Everything Is Awful

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  • Overall
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    4 out of 5 stars

Hilarious!

Im supposed to write 15 words - this book was everything I needed it to be!

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Everything Is Awful

I love everything about Matt Bellassai, I wish the book was even longer! So many laugh out loud moments!

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    5 out of 5 stars
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It’s a miracle he’s even alive at this point

I knew Matt Bellassai was a Leo before I looked up his birthday... his intensely dramatic retelling of the most (hilariously) traumatic events of his life was a dead giveaway. A book like this is much better when read by the author, especially one like Matt. Highly recommend.

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

A delicious Twinkie of a book!

If you’re a fan of web series Whine About It or To Be Honest, you know exactly what you’re in for: lots of giggles, brutal honesty and the most hysterical similes and metaphors around! I enjoyed it!

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A good way to spend a few hours

I started off watching Matt Bellassai's online videos a few months ago, and he is absolutely hilarious! When I heard that he was writing a book, I just knew that I had to read it. And when I heard he was narrating his audiobook, I just knew that I had to have it. Matt's voice makes his already hilarious stories even better! I'd recommend this for anyone looking for a comedic read, or just a fun way to pass a few hours.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Everything is Awful... Except for This Book!

If you like Matt Bellassai's "Wine About It" BuzzFeed videos, you'll definitely enjoy this book. I listened to the audio version because I love to hear comedians read their books in their own voices, and this one did not disappoint.

As usual, Matt says out loud all of the inappropriate things that we're all thinking in our heads but are too polite to vocalize. If you've ever been the nerd, the clumsy one, the fat kid, or the outcast, you'll relate to and laugh along with his tales of shame and awkwardness. I feel a little bad for Matt that he's been all of those. But then I remember that he's famous and has almost 700,000 Facebook fans, so never mind. I don't feel sorry for him at all.

(In truth, I was able to meet Matt Bellassai in person at a book signing and he is truly a super nice human.)

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    4 out of 5 stars
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One of life's mysteries...

This made me laugh out loud more than a few times, and it goes without saying that that's just never bad.
Also, my brain isn't capable of comprehending what may be wrong with people who didn't laugh out loud at any part of this book. I'm truly perplexed... one of life's great mysteries, I guess...

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Hysterically enjoyable!

I bought the book and was ready read it but unfortunately I got a chemical burn in my eye. So reading was not an option at the moment. So I purchase the Audible and was not disappointed! What I was intending to only be a couple chapters for the day, ended up being pretty much the entirety of this book. Listening to him read his own life story with his humor made this so much more enjoyable!

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

I want to be more supportive, but...

Matt is hyper dramatic all the way through, and I am more than slightly horrified by the descriptions he relates about his living conditions. He seems quick witted, and intelligent, but his youth is betraying him. Hopefully, he'll grow into himself a little, I think he could potentially be pretty entertaining.

But in the meantime, DUDE CHILL!

(As a sidebar, I completely agree with his observations about LA, and In and Out is seriously over-rated!)

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Too funny

Funny guy & funny situations. Somebody give him a sitcom. I'll watch it. Do stand up, Matt!

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