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Falling Down

By: Eli Easton
Narrated by: Michael Stellman
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Publisher's summary

Josh finds himself homeless at 18, but he has a plan. He’ll head north on the bus to New England and spend October there for his mother’s sake. She always talked about going to see the fall leaves someday. And when the leaves are done and the harsh winter comes, Josh plans to find a place to curl up and let go. It will be a relief to finally stop fighting.

Mark spent his life trying to live up to the tough swagger of his older brothers until he pushed himself so far against his nature that he cracked. Now a former Marine, he rents a little cabin in the White Mountains of New Hampshire where he can lick his wounds and figure out what to do with the rest of his life. One thing was clear: Mark was nobody’s hero.

Fate intervenes when Josh sets up camp under a covered bridge near Mark’s cabin. Mark recognizes the dead look in the young stranger’s eyes, and he feels compelled to do something about it. When Mark offers Josh a job, he never expects that he’ll be the one to fall.

The snow is coming soon. Can Mark convince Josh that the two of them can build a life together before the flurries begin?

Trigger warning: Suicidal thoughts

©2016 Jane Holmes (P)2019 Jane Holmes
  • Unabridged Audiobook
  • Categories: LGBTQ+
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What listeners say about Falling Down

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

A great angsty story.

Let's start by giving high marks to Michael Stellman - great narration. He really enhances the story.

Then there's the story. The premise revolves around Josh, a homeless 18 year old who finds his way to Vermont with his mother's ashes, and Mark, a 24 year old recently discharged marine who is trying to start his life. The story deals with depression and thoughts of suicide, as well as trust issues and insecurity. Easton is quite fearless with these characters - Josh has a lot of baggage that often doesn't find its way into traditional formula romance, so kudos there. The initial slow burn is good. There are a few well placed supporting characters who help keep the story moving, but the first 2/3 of the book is smartly focused tightly on Josh and Mark. Things go a bit astray after the page 180 break. IMO, it goes on way too long, and didn't have to go as far as it did for the resolution. Not saying terrible, just too much.

The one area where I do have a gripe is the family whitewash. Very often writers will keep a main character in the closet because of an abusive family situation, only to have it all be a misunderstanding, or a case of not realizing what they were doing - and presto, all better!. This isn't really a spoiler, but if you're concerned, stop here. Well into the story, one of Mark's siblings brushes off all the name calling and bullying as "just the way they are with everyone." I don't think Easton goes far enough to address this here. Any kid growing up being called sissy and fairy and gay, while feeling physically threatened in the family unit would be expected to carry major baggage and highly unlikely to feel safe around that family in the blink of an eye. For the sensitivity given to Josh's life experiences that nearly push him to the brink, Mark deserved similar treatment. That aside, I really enjoyed this book, highly recommended.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Good story

I did like this story. Mark started off as a really sweet guy. He rescues Josh and gives him a room, job, food and clothes. Everything is pretty good until Mark’s brother shows up. Then I really despised Mark. He treats Josh so poorly you won’t be surprised at what happens. It all ends well but I just couldn’t believe this nice guy turned so awful in a dime.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Hauntingly lovely

Falling Down is a lovely audio, a nice listen, and it's a great story. Probably not one I should have listened to during a week where a woman who was like a mother to me died, but something about Michael Stellman's steady pace coupled with his beautiful, emotion-filled performance soothed me. Listening to this, I was comforted. I am just so thankful because this helped me get through a truly awful week.

Michael Stellman is one of the few voice actors I listen to who doesn't do character voices, but somehow still expertly conveys, using only changes to his tone and pitch, which character is speaking.

For the sticklers: There are some glitches in the audio, there are also some repeated words, and (this wasn't a problem for me, but I have seen it mentioned by other reviewers, so just a heads up) some chapters are told from both POV and the way this is denoted is by Stellman taking a 3-5 second pause.

Falling Down is a slow burn friends to lovers romance, with some angst and deeper tones that Stellman masterfully performs, a lot of hope, some heated but not too explicit passion, and a wonderful HEA.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

charming story of pain and healing

I began this book a long time ago but couldn't finish it because my own healing wasn't finished. Now I'm sorry the book is over and wish I could experience more of Mark and Josh's story. Great, sensitive narrator who lent so much to the emotional impact of the book.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

So good will relisten to it again

This book just tugs at your heart. Josh is homelss with one last thing he has to do in fall, see the fall leaves. Marc an ex-marine is getting by, painting houses. He finds Josh and offers him a job. The two men form a tentative relationship. when the job is done Josh leaves and Marc goes after him. Will they find the love they both need , they are willing to try.

Also I love the little old lady whose house they are painting. She is sweet and loving.

Michael Stellman did a really good job. Tough emotion in this book and he hit it spot on!

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

road to being okay

enjoyed the narration. it was well paced, clean and clear, the voicing of both characters were nice to listen to. I felt the characters came to life.

kudos to the author for tackling a difficult subject. grief, depression and homelessness are rough subjects and the author really portrayed the character well. u really felt for Josh. really glad there was a happy ending.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Hauntingly Beautiful Journey

Falling Down, by Eli Easton, delivers an emotionally draining yet stunning interpretation of how low a person can descend. The intense depth and strong characterization in the story enhance the overall experience and I sat staring at my iPhone for the longest time, lost in thought when it was over.

A powerful plot, along with Michael Stellman’s masterful, if not chilling, use of inflection, takes us on this hauntingly beautiful journey. Each character is easily identifiable, just by the spoken word, and every emotion radiates through your entire being. As you listen, Stellman submerses you into their world and as you experience their pain and struggle, it morphs into ultimate peace, acceptance and a happy-ever-after.

Unlike his brothers, Mark is not brave and is often harassed by them. His military career was his attempt to toughen up his closeted gay self. After four years and suffering the loss of fellow soldiers, he isn’t any tougher. Actually, in all honesty, he feels much weaker. Unable to bear the scrutiny of his family, Mark settles in the White Mountains of New Hampshire. Suffering from PTSD, taking refuge in a somewhat secluded cabin, and working as a handyman, Mark distances himself from further anguish.

Josh is one dark and troubled young man. His life has been far from easy, but the loss of his mother ultimately extinguishes his internal flame. His plan is to peacefully release himself from the pain, and a calm settles over him. He has one more purpose in life and it is time to fulfill his mother’s dream.

The road to salvation for Mark and Josh begins on a cold October night under a bridge that Josh has chosen for the shelter it provides. Falling Down’s dual points of view enlighten us to each man’s story, as these random strangers slowly confide in each other.

A visit from Mark’s brother is the catalyst that unleashes a series of consequences neither man is willing to accept. Insecurities take a backseat as Mark and Josh fiercely defend what they have. And for a change, they fight instead of giving up. Facing an uncertain and potentially heartbreaking outcome, the pace of the story accelerates as a race to discover the outcome follows.

Falling Down is a magnificent story of self-discovery and acceptance with a sensitive depiction of some dark situations and thoughts. Side by side, Mark and Josh share their stories until the epilogue pulls their individual journeys together. It is then that this truly becomes their story giving them new purchase, focusing on future and family.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Another Wonderful Story, Full of Emotion!!

When you first meet Josh, he's deciding to head North instead of South to Florida with his foster brother, both of them trying to make a new life for themselves. But Josh wants to see the leaves change and remembers the time with his mom when they made plans to do just that. But like everything in Josh's life, nothing really goes to plan. But Mark, who lives nearby the bridge he's chosen to squat under, offers him a job and a place to stay, everything changes for Josh.

The romance between the two is a slow burn. Mark is not out and despite his attraction to Josh, he takes their friendship and possible relationship at a snail's pace. But that allows Mark and Josh to get to know one another and weather the storm that eventually comes.

This is a wonderful story about moving past life's hardships and finding the one person to connect with. The narration is good and I quickly became immersed in the story. There are powerful emotions in this story, but by the end, you are loving every moment!

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Hurts so good

New author / narrator combo for me and it absolutely worked. This is a heavy story, so please mind the trigger warnings about suicidal ideation. I love hurt/comfort as a trope, and Eli Easton nails it here. Just want to give both MCs a giant, reassuring hug! There’s a lot of angst along the way, but the payoff is worth it.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Good narration

I thought Michael Stellman did a nice job with Mark and Josh’s voices. The tone for each man as very distinct.

Mark, an ex marine sort of hides in the woods. Not out to his family, he deliberately moved a couple of hours away from them. Not over his experiences as a marine, he still struggles on almost a daily basis.

Josh, grieving the loss of his mother, is homeless and feeling helpless. He decides to go north to see the fall leaves because his mom always wanted too. His plan is to wait for snow and just let go of life. In his mind it was the perfect solution to his pain and loneliness.

Mark finds Josh and offers him a job. They slowly become friends, then it turns into something more. When Josh’s disappointments get the better of him he makes a terrifying mistake.

This book is about two men coping with circumstances beyond their control. I think the author really brought Josh’s despair to life. Their story was full of pain and need. I liked that their relationship wasn’t hurried.

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