Glory Days
Stories
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Narrated by:
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John Mulaney
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By:
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Simon Rich
About this listen
From the Thurber Prize-winning author of New Teeth, hailed as “a triumph of sustained humor” (Sarah Lyall, New York Times Book Review), comes a hilarious and powerful collection of short stories chronicling the plight of aging millennials.
Super Mario turns forty and is forced to “take-a stock” of his life and how “messed up it’s-a become.”
Goliath struggles to control the media narrative in the lead-up to his death match against David, a small, beloved child.
And a long-discarded participation trophy reminisces about the glorious field day in 1993, when he wound up in the arms of a jubilant, asthmatic Simon Rich.
High-stakes and heartfelt, Glory Days mourns the death of youthful innocence and hails the beginning of something approximating wisdom.
©2024 Simon Rich (P)2024 VoraciousListeners also enjoyed...
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Jenna Jones, former It-girl fashion editor, is broke and desperate for a second chance. When she’s dumped by her longtime fiancé and fired from Darling magazine, she begs for a job from her old arch nemesis, Darcy Vale. The beyond-bitchy publisher of StyleZine.com, Darcy agrees to hire her rival - only because her fashion site needs a jolt from Jenna’s old school cred. But Jenna soon realizes she’s in over her head.
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A-FREAKING-MAZING!!!
- By Bernadette on 05-30-21
By: Tia Williams
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American Psycho
- By: Bret Easton Ellis
- Narrated by: Pablo Schreiber
- Length: 16 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Patrick Bateman moves among the young and trendy in 1980s Manhattan. Young, handsome, and well educated, Bateman earns his fortune on Wall Street by day while spending his nights in ways we cannot begin to fathom. Expressing his true self through torture and murder, Bateman prefigures an apocalyptic horror that no society could bear to confront.
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Fanntastic book but maybe not for everyone....
- By So Fain on 03-27-11
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CRAY
- By: Darrell Hammond, Elizabeth Stein
- Narrated by: Darrell Hammond
- Length: 1 hr and 10 mins
- Original Recording
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He is one of the longest-running cast members on Saturday Night Live, an American comedy genius renowned for his spot-on sendups of politicians and celebrities. But off-stage, Darrell Hammond’s life was anything but a joke. In CRAY, a special audio performance captured live onstage at Audible’s Minetta Lane Theatre, Hammond brings to life his acclaimed memoir, God, If You're Not Up There, I'm F*cked: Tales of Stand-Up, Saturday Night Live and Other Mind-Altering Mayhem.
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Thanks for sharing
- By Nickisnotgary on 09-06-24
By: Darrell Hammond, and others
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Breakfast of Champions
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: John Malkovich
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Breakfast of Champions (1973) provides frantic, scattershot satire and a collage of Vonnegut's obsessions. His recurring cast of characters and American landscape was perhaps the most controversial of his canon; it was felt by many at the time to be a disappointing successor to Slaughterhouse-Five, which had made Vonnegut's literary reputation.
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Kurt Was Right to Grade This a C
- By Dubi on 01-10-16
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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Heads Will Roll
- By: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne
- Narrated by: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne, Tim Gunn, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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Heads Will Roll is an Audible Original from Saturday Night Live star Kate McKinnon and her cocreator/costar (and real-life sister) Emily Lynne. Produced by Broadway Video, this is not an audiobook - it’s a 10-episode, star-studded audio comedy that features performances from Meryl Streep, Tim Gunn, Peter Dinklage, Queer Eye’s Fab Five, and so many more. Please note: This content is not for kids.
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More like this please
- By Anon893 on 05-03-19
By: Kate McKinnon, and others
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Napoleon's Hemorrhoids…And Other Small Events That Changed History
- By: Phil Mason
- Narrated by: LJ Ganser
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Hilarious, fascinating, and a roller coaster of dizzying, historical what-ifs, Napoleon's Hemorrhoids is a potpourri for serious historians and casual history buffs. In one of Phil Mason's many revelations, you'll learn that Communist jets were two minutes away from opening fire on American planes during the Cuban missile crisis, when they had to turn back as they were running out of fuel. You'll discover that before the Battle of Waterloo, Napoleon's painful hemorrhoids prevented him from mounting his horse to survey the battlefield.
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They just throw the facts too fast
- By Concerned_llama on 12-11-20
By: Phil Mason
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An Understated Adventure that keeps you wondering.
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Hard time finishing
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Five hockey players, a cabin in the woods...and little old me, Winnie Berlin. Sounds like the start of a fantasy, right? But it's not. It's my reality. It all started when I got lost in the middle of the Canadian Rockies. A wicked thunderstorm sent my car mud sliding into a ditch, and for a girl whose survival skills involve finding the nearest Starbucks, I was in deep trouble. Forced to abandon my car in search of help, I stumbled upon a cabin in the middle of nowhere.
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✫✫ 4 Stars ✫✫
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Laugh till you cry in this new collection of stories from the “Serena Williams of humor writing” (New York Times Book Review) about raising babies and trying to learn how not to be one.
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Kind of like an SNL skit...starts out funny then..
- By Curtis Hauge on 02-07-22
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It's 1942, and as far as her father knows, Evelyn Bishop, heiress to an aeronautics fortune, is working as a translator in London. In truth, Evelyn—daring, beautiful, and as adept with a rifle as she is in five languages—has joined the Office of Strategic Services as a spy. Her goal is personal: to find her brother, who is being held as a POW in a Nazi labor camp. Through one high-risk mission after another, she is paired with the reckless and rebellious Nick Gallagher, growing ever close to him until the war's end brings with it an act of deep betrayal.
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Short, engaging, and fun mystery!
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After an unremarkable interview, Circus agent George Smiley determines the subject of a standard security check—a civil servant in the Foreign Office named Samuel Fennan—poses no threat, nor presents any reason for suspicion of espionage. Hours later, Samuel Fennan is found dead by suicide. Suddenly finding himself under intense scrutiny, Smiley realizes the Circus intends to blame him for Fennan's death. Rather than remain idle, Smiley begins his own investigation into the nature of the man's demise.
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Charles Vincent seems to have it all—a beautiful wife, two successful children, and a well-paying career. Yet happiness remains out of reach. He is trapped in a loveless marriage and his job is simply a paycheck. But his life changes forever as he drives along the Normandy coast, heading to their lavish château for the weekend. In one terrifying moment, Charles falls asleep at the wheel and veers off the road, plunging thirty feet down the face of a rocky cliff. Miraculously, Charles survives.
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Hard time finishing
- By Jltrova on 06-30-24
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✫✫ 4 Stars ✫✫
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- By Curtis Hauge on 02-07-22
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Hits and Misses
- By: Simon Rich
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Simon Rich is "one of the funniest writers in America" (The Daily Beast) - a humorist who draws comparisons to Douglas Adams (The New York Times Book Review) and James Thurber and P.G. Wodehouse (The Guardian). With Hits and Misses, he's back with a hilarious new collection of stories about dreaming big and falling flat, about ordinary people desperate for stardom and the stars who are bored by having it all.
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why?
- By Kevin on 12-11-19
By: Simon Rich
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Man Seeking Woman
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- By: Simon Rich
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In "Center of the Universe", God struggles to balance the demands of his career with the needs of his long-term girlfriend. In "Magical Mr. Goat", a young girl's imaginary friend yearns to become more than friends. In "Unprotected", an unused prophylactic recalls his years spent trapped inside a teen boy's wallet. The stories in Simon Rich's new audiobook are bizarre, funny, and yet...relatable. Rich explores love's many complications--losing it, finding it, breaking it, and making it--and turns the ordinary into the absurd.
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Amusing at first...
- By T. Kelly on 04-05-13
By: Simon Rich
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The Mysterious Affair at Styles
- By: Agatha Christie, Anna Lea - adaptation
- Narrated by: Peter Dinklage, Himesh Patel, Harriet Walter, and others
- Length: 3 hrs and 53 mins
- Original Recording
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England, 1914. The world is at war. Captain Hastings, injured and shaken, is invited to Styles Court to recover. It’s a grand old country house - the family home of his old friend - and a perfect haven. Or so it seems. But in the blistering summer heat, trouble is afoot. Simmering tensions are tearing the family apart, and it all comes to a head in the most horrifying way.
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It’s a perfect audible movie!
- By Malissa Caudell on 11-15-24
By: Agatha Christie, and others
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Screwball
- By: Simon Rich
- Narrated by: Scott Aiello, Beck Bennett
- Length: 39 mins
- Original Recording
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Before he was “Babe” or “The Sultan of Swat” or “The Great Bambino”, George Herman Ruth was just another teenage misfit at St. Mary’s School for Boys. But Ruth has something the other boys don’t, and when Baltimore Orioles manager Jack Dunn watches him throw a baseball over a building, Ruth gets the chance to punch his ticket out of the orphanage. All he has to do now is make the team.
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Great Story, not for kids
- By Stormy Jones on 07-06-19
By: Simon Rich
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Spoiled Brats (including the story that inspired the major motion picture An American Pickle starring Seth Rogen)
- Stories
- By: Simon Rich
- Narrated by: Simon Rich
- Length: 3 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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From "one of the funniest writers in America" comes a collection of stories culled from the front lines of the millennial culture wars. Rife with failing rock bands, student loans, and participation trophies,
Spoiled Brats is about a generation of narcissists - and the well-meaning boomers who made them that way.
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3 ½ stars. Some clever ideas.
- By Jane on 12-20-14
By: Simon Rich
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Miracle Workers
- A Novel
- By: Simon Rich
- Narrated by: Simon Rich
- Length: 4 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Welcome to Heaven, Inc., the grossly mismanaged corporation in the sky. For as long as anyone can remember, the founder and CEO (known in some circles as "God") has been phoning it in. When God decides to retire (to pursue his lifelong dream of opening an Asian Fusion restaurant), he also decides to destroy Earth. The angels manage to strike a deal with their boss. He'll call off his Armageddon, if they can solve their toughest miracle yet: getting the two most socially awkward humans on the planet to fall in love.
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Fun book!
- By Melea on 04-22-13
By: Simon Rich
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Elliot Allagash
- A Novel
- By: Simon Rich
- Narrated by: Richard Powers
- Length: 6 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Seymour is the least popular student at Glendale, a private school in Manhattan. His new nickname, “Chunk-Style”, is in danger of entering common usage. But then he meets the new transfer student: Elliot Allagash, evil heir of America’s largest fortune. Elliot’s rampant delinquency has already gotten him expelled from dozens of prep schools. But despite his best efforts, he can’t get himself thrown out of Glendale; his father has simply donated too much money. Bitter and bored, Elliot amuses himself by transforming Seymour into the most popular student in the school.
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Great book.
- By Reid Robinson on 01-29-16
By: Simon Rich
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Flannery O'Connor and the Scandal of Faith
- By: Jessica Hooten Wilson, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Jessica Hooten Wilson
- Length: 3 hrs and 5 mins
- Original Recording
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Across six revealing lectures, Professor Jessica Hooten Wilson will introduce you to one of the 20th century’s most fascinating and divisive writers in Flannery O’Connor and the Scandal of Faith. Beginning with an overview of her brief but remarkable life, Professor Wilson will then take you through an exploration of themes in O’Connor’s work and the hallmarks of her literary style. You’ll get a clearer picture of O’Connor’s historical and geographical context while digging into how her stories can transcend time and place.
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Fascinating life cut short
- By KRoss on 11-21-24
By: Jessica Hooten Wilson, and others
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IT'S ALL IN YOUR HEAD
- By: Russ
- Narrated by: Russ
- Length: 1 hr and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Twenty-seven-year-old rapper, songwriter, and producer Russ walks his own path, at his own pace. By doing so, he proved that he didn’t need a major label to surpass over a billion streams on Spotify/Apple Music, sell out arenas across the US and around the globe, and become one of the most popular and engaged rappers right now. His method was simple: love and believe in yourself absolutely and work hard no matter what. In this memoir, Russ inspires listeners to walk to their individual rhythms.
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Inspirational!!
- By Sky Gronholz on 12-02-19
By: Russ
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Episodes
- The True Story of Two Friends & One Diagnosis
- By: Mara Altman, Kat Alexander
- Narrated by: Mara Altman, Kat Alexander
- Length: 7 hrs and 5 mins
- Original Recording
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In Episodes, lifelong best friends Kat and Mara take listeners on an unfiltered journey through friendship, mental illness, and survival. Kat, a successful professional, is preparing for marriage and motherhood. On her fourth round of IVF, it happened—a frantic call to Mara. Mara comes over to find Kat, her friend of 25 years—the one who'd always been levelheaded, hilarious, and over-the-top thoughtful—trying to jump through a window.
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Just listen!
- By AJ on 11-17-24
By: Mara Altman, and others
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Selected Shorts: Funny Business
- By: Simon Rich, R. T. Smith, David Schickler, and others
- Narrated by: Wyatt Cenac, Isiah Sheffer, Kirsten Vangsness, and others
- Length: 3 hrs and 12 mins
- Original Recording
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From wild and wacky to knee-slapping, laugh-out-loud fun, these humorous tales represent some of the best of recent seasons of the hit public radio series Selected Shorts. Comedian Wyatt Cenac gives a killer performance of Simon Rich’s hilarious tale of woe from the point of view of a condom in a young man’s wallet. Alec Baldwin gives a delightful over-the-top performance of James Thurber’s wonderfully silly classic tale of the day everybody in a small Ohio town thought the dam broke.
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Some very entertaining, some not
- By D. Littman on 11-22-14
By: Simon Rich, and others
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Mistletoe Murders 2
- By: Ken Cuperus
- Narrated by: Cobie Smulders, Raymond Ablack, Anna Cathcart, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 30 mins
- Original Recording
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When Emily Lane isn’t busy running her charming Christmas-themed store, “Under the Mistletoe”, located in the quaint tourist town of Fletcher’s Grove, she finds herself compelled to investigate not so quaint local murders. On the surface, Emily is a perfectly lovely, good-natured puzzle-solver and mystery lover. But she is hiding a secret past from everyone in town. And when Emily begins her personal investigations, Detective-Constable Sam Wilner, a smart and attractive cop—with a crush on Emily that is not completely unrequited—begins to wonder if there’s more to Emily than meets the eye.
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Love cobie smulders as a narrator!
- By julia fairchild on 11-20-23
By: Ken Cuperus
What listeners say about Glory Days
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-02-24
It’s weird to laugh this hard during therapy
I should not have listened on my 39th birthday. It made me consider my age, existence, and legacy with equal parts delight, terror, and humility. I will be recommending this to all my elder millennial friends until they are annoyed with me.
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5 people found this helpful
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- Brett Emerson
- 08-04-24
Brilliant stories made even better by John Mulaney's narration
While these wild stories would be great enough in printed form, the readings by comedian John Mulaney make the audio format even better. His impersonation of Super Mario tackling middle age is absolutely hilarious.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Susan B.
- 10-05-24
Genuinely funny!
The whole collection was funny, but some of these stories were off the chart hilarious! Super relatable in an amusing yet horrifying way
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5 people found this helpful
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- Georgia Reviewer
- 11-16-24
Mildly Entertaining
The first story cracked me up; so, I was looking forward to the rest of the book. Unfortunately, I did not find the remainder of the stories nearly as entertaining. Some were better than others; but overall, just so-so.
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- Pål Gunnar Asdal
- 08-05-24
Funny and Inspirational!
I love Simon Rich short stories! First of all they are are very entertaining, but the main reason for me liking them so much is how inspired I get. After reading both this book and his last book "New Teeth", i want to find every small quirky story idea i archived in my notebooks and give them another try :D John Mulaney´s performance is superb. And a highlight for me was the "Participation Trophy" story. Just loved the book!
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6 people found this helpful
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- KMM
- 08-16-24
Endless laughter
Fantastic selection of Simon Rich’s short stories. Really enjoyed his entertaining content and the narration!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 11-18-24
Not the best
Was expecting a funnier book. Narration was less than expected based on previous experience with narrator.
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- Dreamz with a Z
- 08-03-24
great stories, terrible reader
the short stories are on par with simon rich’s others. i was a little surprised that rich didn’t read the book himself but figured it would be fine since it was a famous comedian reading. wrong. the performance is bad. there are whole sections where he stumbles thru lines and it’s wild they just went with it and didn’t have him re-read it.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Eileen Froehlich
- 07-29-24
Hilairous
Loved it and it made me laugh out loud. Great narrator and the tone was perfect for a midsummer pick me up
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2 people found this helpful
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- auntnancy
- 11-18-24
so much fun
I was smiling through the whole book. I only picked this up, because it was a daily special and I had just finished some heavy books and thought this would be a little break for me. I'm not sure which chapter was my favorite. They were all delightful.
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