Labor of Love
The Invention of Dating
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Narrated by:
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Kyra Miller
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By:
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Moira Weigel
About this listen
"Does anyone date anymore?"
Today the authorities tell us that courtship is in crisis. But when Moira Weigel dives into the history of sex and romance in modern America, she discovers that authorities have always said this.
Ever since young men and women started to go out together, older generations have scolded them: That's not the way to find true love. The first women who made dates with strangers were often arrested for prostitution; long before "hookup culture", there were "petting parties"; before parents worried about cell phone apps, they fretted about joyrides and "parking".
Dating is always dying. But this does not mean that love is dead. It simply changes with the economy. Dating is, and always has been, tied to work. Lines like "I'll pick you up at six" made sense at a time when people had jobs that started and ended at fixed hours. But in an age of contract work and flextime, many of us have become sexual freelancers, more likely to text a partner, "u still up?"
Weaving together over 100 years of history with scenes from the contemporary landscape, Labor of Love offers a fresh feminist perspective on how we came to date the ways we do. This isn't a guide to "getting the guy". There are no ridiculous "rules" to follow. Instead Weigel helps us understand how looking for love shapes who we are and hopefully leads us closer to the happy ending that dating promises.
©2016 Moira Weigel (P)2016 Recorded BooksListeners also enjoyed...
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The book I have been waiting for!
- By A Teacher on 09-10-10
By: Gail Collins
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When Brooklyn Was Queer
- By: Hugh Ryan
- Narrated by: Hugh Ryan
- Length: 11 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Hugh Ryan's When Brooklyn Was Queer is a groundbreaking exploration of the LGBT history of Brooklyn, from the early days of Walt Whitman in the 1850s up through the queer women who worked at the Brooklyn Navy Yard during World War II, and beyond. In intimate, evocative, moving prose, Ryan brings this never-before-told story of Brooklyn's vibrant and forgotten queer history to life.
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A Love Letter
- By Jeffrey on 06-26-19
By: Hugh Ryan
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Bad Sex
- Truth, Pleasure, and an Unfinished Revolution
- By: Nona Willis Aronowitz
- Narrated by: Nona Willis Aronowitz
- Length: 9 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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At thirty-two years old, everything in Nona Willis Aronowitz’s life, and in America, was in disarray. Her marriage was falling apart. Her nuclear family was slipping away. Her heart and libido were both in overdrive. Embroiled in an era of fear, reckoning, and reimagining, her assumptions of what “sexual liberation” meant were suddenly up for debate.
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I was born in the 50s, sexually active in the mid 70s
- By Pixel on 08-22-22
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Tied Up in Knots
- How Getting What They Wanted Has Made Women Miserable
- By: Andrea Tantaros
- Narrated by: Andrea Tantaros
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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In this shocking, funny, and bluntly honest tour of today's gender discontents, Andrea Tantaros, one of Fox News' most popular and outspoken stars, exposes how the rightful feminist pursuit of equality went too far, and how the unintended pitfalls of that power trade have made women (and men!) miserable.
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Not What I Thought It Would Be
- By Kevin on 05-06-16
By: Andrea Tantaros
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Flapper
- A Madcap Story of Sex, Style, Celebrity, and the Women Who Made America Modern
- By: Joshua Zeitz
- Narrated by: Daniella Rabbani
- Length: 11 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Blithely flinging aside the Victorian manners that kept her disapproving mother corseted, the New Woman of the 1920's puffed cigarettes, snuck gin, hiked her hemlines, danced the Charleston, and necked in roadsters. More important, she earned her own keep, controlled her own destiny, and secured liberties that modern women take for granted. Her newfound freedom heralded a radical change in American culture.
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Good Book, Poor Performance
- By redsrule1 on 03-16-14
By: Joshua Zeitz
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A Strange Stirring
- 'The Feminine Mystique' and American Women at the Dawn of the 1960s
- By: Stephanie Coontz
- Narrated by: Diane Cardea
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Based on exhaustive research and interviews, and challenging both conservative and liberal myths about Friedan, A Strange Stirring brilliantly illuminates how a generation of women came to realize that their dissatisfaction with domestic life didn’t reflect their personal weakness but rather a social and political injustice.
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Good histroy and well written
- By Hannah Lasher on 06-18-16
By: Stephanie Coontz
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We Were Feminists Once
- From Riot Grrrl to CoverGirl®, the Buying and Selling of a Political Movement
- By: Andi Zeisler
- Narrated by: Joell A. Jacob
- Length: 10 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Today, feminism is no longer a dirty word, and women purporting to stand up for women's equality now include high-powered names like Beyoncé, Taylor Swift, and Emma Watson. Hip underwear lines sell granny pants with "feminist" emblazoned on the back. In every bookstore, there are scores of seductive feminist how-to business guides telling women how to achieve "it all".
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Fantastic book despite shoddy narration
- By Seth H. Wilson on 05-19-16
By: Andi Zeisler
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He's a Stud, She's a Slut, and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know
- By: Jessica Valenti
- Narrated by: Julie McKay
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Double standards are nothing new. Women deal with them every day. Take the common truism that women who sleep around are sluts while men are studs. Why is it that men grow distinguished and sexily gray as they age while women just get saggy and haggard? Have you ever wondered how a young woman is supposed to both virginal and provocatively enticing at the same time?
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A well acted intro to feminist consciousness
- By Amazon Customer on 02-28-24
By: Jessica Valenti
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Manifesto
- On Never Giving Up
- By: Bernardine Evaristo
- Narrated by: Bernardine Evaristo
- Length: 6 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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From the best-selling and Booker Prize-winning author of Girl, Woman, Other, Bernardine Evaristo’s memoir of her own life and writing, and her manifesto on unstoppability, creativity, and activism.
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Glorious performance and inspiring story
- By Maggi Morehouse on 01-25-22
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Unrequited
- Women and Romantic Obsession
- By: Lisa A. Phillips
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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The summer Lisa A. Phillips turned 30, she fell in love with someone who didn't return her feelings. She soon became obsessed. She followed him around, called him compulsively, and talked about him endlessly. One desperate morning, after she snuck into his apartment building, he picked up a baseball bat to protect himself and began to dial 911. Her unrequited love had changed her from a sane, conscientious college teacher and radio reporter into someone she barely recognized.
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Great book! So-so narrator....
- By ToluGrace on 04-14-15
By: Lisa A. Phillips
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It's Not You
- 27 (Wrong) Reasons You're Single
- By: Sara Eckel
- Narrated by: Nina Alvamar
- Length: 4 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Based on her popular Modern Love column, Sara Eckel’s It’s Not You challenges these myths, encouraging singletons to stop picking apart their personalities and to start tapping into their own wisdom about who and what is right for them. Supported by the latest psychological and sociological research, as well as interviews with people who have experienced longtime singledom, Eckel creates a strong and empowering argument to understand and accept that there’s no one reason why you’re single - you just are.
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Good Book
- By Anonymous User on 05-24-20
By: Sara Eckel
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Feminism and Pop Culture
- Seal Studies
- By: Andi Zeisler
- Narrated by: Angela Reed
- Length: 6 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Whether or not we like to admit it, pop culture is a lens through which we alternately view and shape the world around us. When it comes to feminism, pop culture aids us in translating feminist philosophies, issues, and concepts into everyday language, making them relevant and relatable. In Feminism and Pop Culture, author and cofounder of Bitch magazine Andi Zeisler traces the impact of feminism on pop culture (and vice versa) from the 1940s to the present and beyond.
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Really needs an update
- By Lori Grossman on 04-05-18
By: Andi Zeisler
What listeners say about Labor of Love
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- C. Pomeroy
- 02-17-17
Unexpected Destroyer of Internalized Misogyny
Fascinating history. Thoughtful social commentary. Destructive to misogyny - especially heretofore unrealized internalized misogyny.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Nick
- 09-23-16
amazing
when I first bought this book, I was thinking it was going to be about how hard relationships can be, and how to work on them to make them better. I was surprised when it turned out to be more about the history of dating and American cultural norms behind it. the book was so informative, I loved it. it was very sociologically oriented to study the dynamics between two people who are dating or married. It was quite enjoyable.
at times, it was kind of hard to follow whether or not the narrator was reading a quote from another study or not, but other than that, I would highly recommend it.
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20 people found this helpful
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- NMwritergal
- 12-21-17
More than just a history of dating
I was expecting a history of dating but got a lot more, all of which I found interesting. It provided lots of food for thought.
I'm surprised I liked it as much as I did because if there was any structure, I couldn't really find it. It jumped around from different subjects, eras, gay, straight, black, white, hookup culture, video dating and online dating, the summer of love, Sex and the Single Girl, objectification of women. You name it, it was there!
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3 people found this helpful
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- visionaryprism2
- 11-19-23
Poses all of the hard questions about love
A book that is much more serious and well-researched than the cover suggests.
It’s light-hearted and funny at times but seriously examines the history of dating and gender relations from a feminist perspective that’s both academic enough for college-level feminists to appreciate while being widely accessible to the layperson.
In fact this book uses love and the awkwardness of modern dating, as the perfect segue into deeper examination of sexism, patriarchy and equality. Highly recommended.
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- Gillian
- 02-14-17
Not Meant To Be Useful, But Quite Fun
"Labor of Love" isn't a how-to book, so don't go in expecting that. Rather, it's a historical look at dating and the way we flounder around looking for that fleeting something.
In earlier times, a couple was focused on the same goal; nowadays we look within ourselves seeking to have something gratified, never understanding that it's what we bring to the table and to our culture that matters.
This book covers everything from "calling" on someone to "hooking up" (and boy does college mess with our dating code, or what?) From Girls Gone Wild, to the AIDS epidemic. From "settling" to speed-dating to dating apps to geo-location.
It's not a heavy in-depth read, but it sure is interesting, and Kyra Miller delivers it decently enough with plenty of tongue-in-cheekiness.
By the way? Weigel thinks the best way to change our culture is by banding together and organizing. As somebody with PTSD from my dating years, if I ever go back out there, I say we Unionize...!
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33 people found this helpful
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- Justin Sproles
- 11-03-19
Excellent, Though Biased
This book is well written and researched. More than a cursory look, Weigel displays her acute knowledge of American dating history. Her prose are witty and her writing style is lofty. She knows how to capture the attention of her audience. The narrator does not disappoint. Her delivery reflects a strong grasp on the humorous and derisive tone of the book.
The reason I gave the book 3 stars despite all my praises is the book has a deep-seeded bias that is predictable and unchanging throughout. A quick glance at the title will not indicate the ubiquitous left-leaning commentary that governs Weigel's presentation of the content. The author isolates a handful of groups for unrelenting criticism: men, Caucasians, the wealthy, Christians, and conservatives. As a corollary, she cites approvingly historical figures like Karl Marx and the founders of modern Feminism. If you have a similar axe to grind this book will be perfect for you. if your concern, however, is with the fair reporting of dating research you will have to carefully separate the meat from the bone, the vendetta from the facts.
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- José Montes
- 02-26-17
What a great audible!
From beginning to middle and and end, this audible had me inganged. It dropped knowledge about "love" from way back in the day til now- the modern digital era. Drawing from scientific data and other well known sourcessource. It gave me a new way to not only look at love but perhaps a new way to pursuit it. Highly recommend it!!
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1 person found this helpful
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- David Anderson
- 12-10-16
entertaining and interesting enough
interesting look at the history of dating, and its relationship to economic trends. Pretty well written, although it tries too hard to be poetic in places. The links between the labor market and how that changed dating were the strongest. The pop-sociology parts seemed forced in. all in all interesting and a nice quick listen. entertaining and informative
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12 people found this helpful
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- Chrisica
- 06-20-16
Amazing book!
This book is a thoughtful look through time, gender, race and class in the U.S. Who knew speed dating was invented by a rabbi! Thanks a million!
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12 people found this helpful
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- Lindsay
- 02-22-17
Who knew there was so much history to dating?!
What made the experience of listening to Labor of Love the most enjoyable?
The whole book flowed so well. At no point did it feel like a lecture; dry and boring. The information was captivating and informative.
What does Kyra Miller bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?
Kyra's narration is lovely though there wasn't anything I felt that she did that you wouldn't get from reading the book.
What’s the most interesting tidbit you’ve picked up from this book?
It's hard to narrow down to just one tidbit but I really appreciate that she including gay and lesbian dating culture in her exploration too.
And she stated that during the show "Seinfeld", Jerry dating 66 women on the show, none of them too serious, because that would have changed the whole dynamic of the core group of characters.
Any additional comments?
Fascinating look at the history of dating. Who knew that there was so much history behind something we've all been doing for so long? At no point did it feel like a lecture; dry and boring. The information was captivating and informative. Moira also includes gay and lesbian dating culture and talks about the less that appealing aspects of dating that we have all been through. This isn't a self-help book about how to date. It's an interesting exploration of how we date and why.
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2 people found this helpful