Lemons on Friday Audiobook By Mattie Jackson Selecman cover art

Lemons on Friday

Trusting God Through My Greatest Heartbreak

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Lemons on Friday

By: Mattie Jackson Selecman
Narrated by: Mattie Selecman
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About this listen

This audiobook edition is read by the author and includes the song “Racing the Dark” performed by Alan Jackson and cowritten with his daughter Mattie Jackson Selecman.

After being married for less than a year, country music legend Alan Jackson’s daughter Mattie was faced with navigating a future that didn’t include her young husband and their lifelong plans.

Ben Selecman passed away 12 days after a traumatic brain injury - and three weeks before celebrating his first anniversary with his wife. Twenty-eight-year-old Mattie had to find a way to move forward and reconcile herself with a good God, even when he did not give her the healing miracle she prayed for.

In Lemons on Friday, you will walk with Mattie Jackson Selecman during the first years of grief following Ben’s tragic death as she grapples with her loss and leans on a steadfast God. Based on Selecman’s journal writings, Lemons on Friday will speak to all listeners who must carry on without their loved ones and take a hard look at faith when their lives have not gone as planned.

Lemons on Friday grapples with questions like these:

  • How did I get here?
  • Will this always hurt?
  • Who am I now?
  • How do I move forward?

“When fundamental parts of our lives are lost, when people and things we thought we’d never lose are suddenly gone, it’s natural to want answers,” writes Selecman. “Why did this happen? Who’s to blame? What could I have done differently? And for many of us in the aftermath of life-shattering change, we also want to know, where is God? Not just where was He when the tragedy happened, but where is He now in my darkest days of hurt, wondering, and longing for comfort? When I am on the floor, writhing in tears with no idea what the rest of my life will look like, where is God?”

Lemons on Friday offers insight and peace for anyone grieving, but especially for young people experiencing loss and facing a future that feels full of question marks.

©2021 Mattie Jackson Selecman (P)2021 Thomas Nelson
Death & Grief Grief & Loss Relationships Marriage
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Critic reviews

"'When a tea bag gets steeped in hot water, the true content and nature of what's inside the bag, whether sweet or bitter, is revealed. The same is true of people when their lives become steeped in unexpected sorrow and loss. I will never forget how the sweet aroma of Christ, even and especially through honest yet noncynical, humble tears, came out of Mattie when she lost her beloved husband, Ben. I am thankful that she has gone more public with her story, so that others can see in it the goodness of God in times when they need him most." (Scott Sauls, senior pastor of Christ Presbyterian Church and author of Jesus Outside the Lines and A Gentle Answer)

"Mattie's story carries you through a valley of unbearable heartbreak, and in the very next moment you are experiencing an ocean of peace that is the heartbeat of Jesus. Her honesty and vulnerability in this book are a beacon of light to any heart that has experienced total darkness. The courage and wisdom expressed through her words will inspire hope in readers, no matter their walk of life." (Lauren Akins, author of the New York Times best seller Live in Love: Growing Together Through Life's Changes)

"There is a sisterhood among all of us who have been widowed at far too young of an age. That's where our story intersected with Mattie's. She's wonderful, witty, and wise beyond her years. In Lemons on Friday she takes us all on a journey that is less about making lemonade out of lemons and more about looking to faith for transformational healing. Her story of loss, with hope, reminds us that partnering with Christ can turn the bitter sorrows of life into something far sweeter than we could ever accomplish on our own." (Rachel Brown and Ginger Ravella, founders, Be Still Ministries and Never Alone Widows Retreats)

What listeners say about Lemons on Friday

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Such an impactful book

I would like to start by thanking Mattie for sharing such an intimate part of her life!
This book was tremendous and so well written. I loved each theme and title of each chapter. I have been talking to so many friends and family about the thoughts and ideas of this book it truly touched and inspired me.
Highly recommend if going through a tough time or even want to be infused with some extra faith, this book is for you!

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Tears of hope

Although no actual connection to Mattie, I’ve always felt connected to this story as my husband and I also married on 10/7/17 at our home in Pegram (near Nashville). Listening to her story in her own voice brought so many tears. Such a message of hope in the dark. I’ve thought of her so many times as I’ve taken my own journey through marriage and motherhood on what would have been her timeline as well. I’m so thrilled she’s now experiencing all the joys of motherhood and love again. 🩷

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Awesome!

I was hoping to get this book soon and when I saw it was on Audible I was overjoyed. That way my husband could hear it at the same time.
We love our Alan Jackson recordings and play his hymns as we go to sleep at night.

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This book really spoke to me!

This book will bless many people who are going thru a season of loss. I am glad I chose the audible version so I could hear the author, Mattie, share her testimony. She supports everything she shares with scripture. I will be sharing this book with others!

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Sharing Grief and Faith

The book is narrated by the author, Mattie Jackson Selecman. Her narration made the story of her tragedy and grief more impactful, because the raw pain came through in every word. But so did the comfort of her faith and the healing. Mattie's tragedy was the sudden loss of her husband in a freak accident. They had been married less than a year and had made plans for their future and children. At the loss of her husband, Mattie felt like she lost her entire future. She had moments of total despair and then God nods--a moment of hope in the midst of her sorrow. Her story, as she repeats several times in the book, is hers alone. No one else will experience the same loss in the same way. But most of us will go through loss of some kind--loss of a spouse, loss of a home, loss of a dream, loss of a family, and often one event leads to a multiplicity of losses. It may be hard to see a way past the grief and sorrow and loss. But as Mattie shares in her story, gradually with God's grace the pain lessens, though it never goes away. Those God nods show a way to move forward, if only for a little way. Little by little, leaning on God, realizing there is nothing you can do in this situation. God may not change your circumstances--nothing will bring Ben back--but he will lead us into a life that can still be joyful and faith filled. One jolt for Mattie was when she was asked if she had loved Ben more than Jesus. No person, no possession, no relationship, nothing should rank higher in our life than our Lord. Mattie said that didn't make her love Ben less, but she came to love God more. I highly recommend this book for any believer who is suffering, whether a loss or a health issue or outside condition that you can't change or anything else that is causing you pain.

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Beautifully written

Such a brave act to be so raw and open about her own life and feelings. I absolutely felt uplifted amidst a story of struggle. I would recommend this book to anyone that is looking to restore hope in their life.

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Phenomenal book

Though I've never lost a spouse, I've lost lost my dad, mom and my brother. All the little signs that she saw along the way and things she experienced, I can relate to. Being at the bedside of a loved one who is passing, Her descriptions and feelings were so on key.
Of course they would be, they're Her story. It was well narrated and I highly recommend it. I just purchased 2 of the hard cover books for a couple friends of mine. Blessings.

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Thank you

I lost my father And my oldest sister within 6 months of each other! I wasn’t coping well! I would go through my day to day motions as a home health nurse. I would pray and ask questions without answers! Now I’m seeing the God nods and realize exactly as you say and our father in heaven say Thy will be done, there is no because at the end. Thank you for helping me see that I was asking in the wrong way! I will put my arms around my wonderful daddy and my sister again! God Bless.

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Absolutely LOVE this story of hope and healing!

I love this story of hope and healing in the midst of darkness. As someone who is on this journey I do appreciate Mattie’s desire to seek the Lord for that healing. I can’t imagine doing this without HIM and I love the encouragement given in the lines of the amazing testimony. Praise God He takes our hand and walks with us. I highly recommend this read. Thank you, Mattie for sharing!

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Great book for young widows

I am a new widow and younger as well. It’s a challenge as a young widow to feel related too as most widows are older in age and lived a life with their partner. It is a different kind of loss to be a young widow and loose the hope of creating the life you dreamt of with a partner for years and never get to see that come to fruition. This book allowed me to feel validated in so many ways. I listened through this book pretty quickly because I felt so related too and would recommend this to any young female widow. Thank you Mattie for writing this.

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