Once upon a Crime
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Narrated by:
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Fergus Craig
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By:
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Fergus Craig
About this listen
The absurd crime fiction parody by fictional author 'Martin Fishback' - as seen on BBC Two.
Exeter: a city in decline, East Devon's capital of crime.
Detective Roger LeCarre: a man on a quest to rid the world of crime (starting with Devon and Cornwall and then working outwards) so he can concentrate on his watercolours.
LeCarre runs 10 km a day but probably burns more calories shaking his head at what has become of his city. Now Exeter is set to become the UK Capital of Culture and the ambitious lord mayor wants to turn things around. But when a young man's (dead) body is found in the centre of town, things get murky.
Detective Roger LeCarre is a character never seen before in modern fiction - a tough but troubled detective with a drink problem and a marriage in trouble. Can he find out who killed the young man, save the city and change his energy provider before the new more expensive tariff kicks in?
Filled with drama, eroticism and very specific Wikipedia-sourced information on Devon, Once upon a Crime is a thriller that takes itself very seriously and that should not, on any account, actually be taken seriously.
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Critic reviews
"What's better than a good crime novel? I'll tell you - a spoof crime novel, by the absurdly funny and clever Fergus Craig." (Miranda Hart)
"We all need more laughs like this." (Aisling Bea)
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Story
Detective Mike McCabe moved from a top homicide job with the NYPD to Portland, Maine, to leave his failed marriage and suspicions of wrongdoing behind, and to find a more peaceful life for himself and his 13-year-old daughter. But the small New England city is not nearly as safe as he thought. On a warm September night, a missing high school athlete is found dead in a scrap-metal yard, her heart removed from her body with surgical precision. As outrage over the killing spreads, a young businesswoman disappears while out on a morning jog.
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Is It The Story? Or Its Telling? Hmmmm...
- By Ted on 12-01-15
By: James Hayman
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Baltimore Blues
- Tess Monaghan, Book 1
- By: Laura Lippman
- Narrated by: Deborah Hazlett
- Length: 9 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Unemployed at 29, Tess Monaghan is willing to take any freelance job to pay the rent—including a bit of unorthodox snooping for her rowing buddy, Darryl "Rock" Paxton. In a city where someone is murdered almost every day, attorney Michael Abramowitz's death should be just another statistic. But the slain lawyer's notoriety—and his noontime trysts with Rock's fiancée—make the case front page news...and point to Rock as the likely murderer. But trying to prove her friend's innocence could prove costly to Tess.
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I'm on #8 - This series is almost unique
- By connie on 02-19-12
By: Laura Lippman
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How to Find Your Way in the Dark
- The Sheldon Horowitz Series, Book 1
- By: Derek B. Miller
- Narrated by: Michael Crouch
- Length: 12 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Twelve-year old Sheldon Horowitz is still recovering from the tragic loss of his mother only a year ago when a suspicious traffic accident steals the life of his father near their home in rural Massachusetts. It is 1938, and Sheldon, who was in the truck, emerges from the crash an orphan hell-bent on revenge. He takes that fire with him to Hartford, where he embarks on a new life under the roof of his buttoned-up Uncle Nate.
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Absolutely wonderful story.
- By George Thomas on 12-11-21
By: Derek B. Miller
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Ordinary Thunderstorms
- A Novel
- By: William Boyd
- Narrated by: Gideon Emery
- Length: 12 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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One May evening in London, Adam Kindred, a young climatologist in town for a job interview, is feeling good about the future as he sits down for a meal at a little Italian bistro. He strikes up a conversation with a solitary diner at the next table, who leaves soon afterward. With horrifying speed, this chance encounter leads to a series of malign accidents, through which Adam loses everything—home, family, friends, job, reputation, passport, credit cards, cell phone—never to get them back.
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Amazing Story Teller
- By Dorothy on 09-07-14
By: William Boyd
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The Rabbit Factory
- By: Marshall Karp
- Narrated by: Tom Stechschulte, James Jenner
- Length: 14 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Marshall Karp is an acclaimed playwright known for his witty sense of humor and crackling dialogue. His debut novel The Rabbit Factory stars the irreverent LAPD detective duo of Mike Lomax and Terry Biggs. Dean Lamaar is the architect of an entertainment empire and the creator of iconic characters like Rambunctious Rabbit and McGreedy the Moose.
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Bizarre but engaging mystery.1st-rate performance.
- By MidwestGeek on 12-19-12
By: Marshall Karp
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I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan
- By: Alan Partridge
- Narrated by: Alan Partridge
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Journalist, presenter, broadcaster, husband, father, vigorous all-rounder – Alan Partridge – a man with a fascinating past and an amazing future. Gregarious and popular, yet Alan’s never happier than when relaxing in his own five-bedroom, south-built house with three acres of land and access to a private stream. But who is this mysterious enigma? Alan Gordon Partridge is the best – and best-loved – radio presenter in the region. Born into a changing world of rationing, Teddy Boys, apes in space and the launch of ITV, Alan’s broadcasting career began as chief DJ of Radio Smile....
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An Anglican giant among pygmies
- By John on 06-20-12
By: Alan Partridge
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Sign of the Cross: A Collins-Burke Mystery, Book 1
- By: Anne Emery
- Narrated by: Christian Rummel
- Length: 11 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Monty Collins is a sharp-tongued public defender who just wants to represent an upstanding character for a change. A priest with something to hide isn't quite what he had hoped for, but when the literate, arrogant, and tight-lipped Father Brennan Burke is implicated in the strange murder of a young woman, Monty doesn't just take the case - the case takes him. When Burke won't come clean, Monty is forced to play private detective, traveling into his client's past. Things look good for the case until another body is found....
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Hybrid Mystery
- By connie on 07-31-12
By: Anne Emery
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Down Cemetery Road
- By: Mick Herron
- Narrated by: Julia Franklin
- Length: 13 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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When a house explodes in a quiet Oxford suburb and a young girl disappears in the aftermath, Sarah Tucker becomes obsessed with finding her. Accustomed to dull chores in a childless household and hosting her husband’s wearisome business clients for dinner, Sarah suddenly finds herself questioning everything she thought she knew, as her investigation reveals that people long believed dead are still among the living, while the living are fast joining the dead.
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A bit of a slog....
- By rhl60 on 01-26-24
By: Mick Herron
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No Lesser Plea
- Butch Karp and Marlene Ciampi, Book 1
- By: Robert K. Tanenbaum
- Narrated by: Traber Burns
- Length: 11 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Manhattan Assistant District Attorney Roger "Butch" Karp has been around New York long enough to realize that the judicial system can be dirty and cynical. But he still believes in justice. So when a vicious sociopath tries to dodge a brutal murder charge by convincing the court he is incompetent to stand trial, Karp teams up with firecracker Assistant DA Marlene Ciampi to unleash the full force of their relentless energy, hardboiled wit, and passion for the truth to put the killer away for good. They will accept no lesser plea.
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A Decent LIsten
- By Ted on 08-31-14
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Perfect Remains
- DI Callanach, Book 1
- By: Helen Fields
- Narrated by: Robin Laing
- Length: 12 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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On a remote Highland mountain, the body of Elaine Buxton is burning. All that will be left to identify the respected lawyer are her teeth and a fragment of clothing. In the concealed back room of a house in Edinburgh, the real Elaine Buxton screams into the darkness…. Detective Inspector Luc Callanach has barely set foot in his new office when Elaine’s missing persons case is escalated to a murder investigation. Having left behind a promising career at Interpol, he’s eager to prove himself to his new team.
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A great disappointment
- By Amazon Customer on 12-20-19
By: Helen Fields
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Sidney Sheldon's Angel of the Dark
- By: Sidney Sheldon, Tilly Bagshawe
- Narrated by: Michael Kramer
- Length: 10 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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It was his first big murder case - and one of the bloodiest and most violent crimes LAPD detective Danny McGuire would ever encounter. Andrew Jakes, an elderly multimillionaire art dealer, had been brutally murdered in his Hollywood home, his lifeless body tied to his naked young wife. Raped and beaten, the lovely Angela Jakes had barely survived the attack herself. Gazing into her deep, soulful eyes, Danny swore that he'd find the psychopath behind this barbarous act.
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A great book with a surprising ending
- By Norwegian kebler on 11-04-12
By: Sidney Sheldon, and others
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Killed at the Whim of a Hat
- By: Colin Cotterill
- Narrated by: Jeany Park
- Length: 10 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Jimm Juree was a crime reporter for the Chiang Mai Daily Mail with a somewhat eccentric family. When she is forced to follow her family to a rural village on the coast of Southern Thailand, she’s convinced her career—maybe her life—is over. So when a van containing the skeletal remains of two hippies is inexplicably unearthed in a local farmer’s field, Jimm is thrilled. Shortly thereafter an abbot at a local Buddhist temple is viciously murdered.
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delighted...
- By Bobbie on 08-23-11
By: Colin Cotterill
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Dead Before Dying
- By: Deon Meyer
- Narrated by: Simon Vance
- Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Three men who have nothing in common are found murdered in Cape Town, and the string of vicious killings pushes the city toward panic. Captain Mat Joubert is left scrambling for answers in a case that might be his last chance to prove that his life's slow spiral will not pull him under.
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South African mystery, very good.
- By Kathleen on 09-29-12
By: Deon Meyer
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Blood for Blood
- Ziba MacKenzie, Book 1
- By: Victoria Selman
- Narrated by: Karen Cass
- Length: 8 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Rush hour, London. A packed commuter train is torn apart in a collision. Picking through the carnage, ex-special forces profiler Ziba MacKenzie helps a dying woman who passes on a cryptic message: He did it. You have to tell someone. When a corpse is found bearing the gruesome signature of a serial killer dormant for twenty-five years, Ziba is pulled into the hunt for the perpetrator. As the body count rises it becomes clear he’s on a new spree. But what’s brought the London Lacerator back after such a long hiatus?
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Great New Series—Ziba Is Good Female Lead
- By Linda on 04-16-19
By: Victoria Selman
What listeners say about Once upon a Crime
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Manly Geek
- 01-13-24
Hilarious Tongue in Cheek Detective Story
Made all the better by the author’s reading providing plenty of tongue for that cheek. And of course lots of CRIME!
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- Andreas
- 10-26-21
People are staring at me on the subway.
Suddenly laughing out loud on the subway isn’t something I usually do. But whilst listening to the amazing performance of Fergus Craig, it is impossible not to.
I hope this book gets to be a movie. It would be the funniest movie ever made (so far) in the history of man kind. And the universe. And the solar system, in which we all live and do our stuff from day to day.
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1 person found this helpful
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- SeattleSounding
- 07-12-24
Hilarious spoof.
Don't recall how I found this book but so glad I did. Great performance by the author who reads it.
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