Surviving Parental Alienation
A Journey of Hope and Healing
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Narrated by:
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Madeleine Dauer
About this listen
Half of all marriages end, and, when they do, most parents hope to achieve a "good divorce" in which they can amicably raise their children with their former spouse. Unfortunately, about 20% of divorces are high-conflict, involving frequent visits to court, allegations of abuse, and chronic disagreements regarding parenting schedules.
In response to this conflict, some children become aligned with one parent against the other - even a parent who has done nothing to warrant the hostile rejection of their formerly loving children. These "targeted" parents suffer from the loss of time with their children, the pain of watching their children become distant, even cruel, and the uncertainty of not knowing if and when their children will come back to them. These parents are on a painful journey with an uncertain outcome. Surviving Parental Alienation fills the tremendous need for concrete help for these parents.
Too often parental alienation stories that are shared by word of mouth, on the internet, or in books depict unending pain and frightening outcomes. Surviving Parental Alienation provides true stories and information about parents who have reconnected with their lost and stolen children, and offers better insight and understanding into what exactly parental alienation is and how to handle it.
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The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption
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Open adoption isn't just something parents do when they exchange photos, send emails, share a visit. It's a lifestyle that may feel intrusive at times, be difficult or inconvenient at other times. Tensions can arise even in the best of circumstances. But knowing how to handle these situations and how to continue to make arrangements work for the child involved is paramount. This book offers listeners the tools and the insight to do just that.
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Who is talking?
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Love Is a Choice
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In Love Is a Choice, best-selling doctors Robert Hemfelt, Frank Minirth, and Paul Meier walk you through their 10 proven stages to recovery from codependency that results from external circumstances. Humans are susceptible to codependency because of our sinful tendency to use defense mechanisms to fool ourselves. In codependent relationships, deceitful games are played, and important Christian principles are often taken out of context and abused.
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Great book, horrible Performance
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By: Dr. Robert Hemfelt, and others
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Divorce Poison
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Your ex-spouse is bad-mouthing you to your children, perhaps even trying to turn them against you. If you handle the situation ineffectively, your relationship with your children could suffer. This groundbreaking work gives parents powerful strategies to preserve and rebuild loving relationships with their children and provides legal and mental health professionals with practical advice to help their clients and ensure the welfare of children.
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Required Reading
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Ten Stupid Things Men Do to Mess Up Their Lives
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Following the tremendous success of her New York Times best sellers, Ten Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives and How Could You Do That?!, Dr. Laura Schlessinger, the conscience of talk radio, now addresses the stupid things men do that diminish their lives and happiness. With real-world examples from her radio show and strikingly honest letters from her male listeners, her book reveals that many men demonstrate a level of sensitivity and insight that will surprise most women.
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Loved it!
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Strong Mothers, Strong Sons
- Lessons Mothers Need to Raise Extraordinary Men
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From the moment a mother holds her newborn son, his eyes tell her that she is his world. But often, as he grows up, the boy who needs her simultaneously pushes her away. Calling upon thirty years of experience as a pediatrician, Meg Meeker, MD, a highly sought-after national speaker, assistant professor of clinical medicine, and mother of four, shares the secrets that every mother needs to know in order to strengthen-or rebuild-her relationship with her son.
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Update of wording in your book is required
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By: Meg Meeker
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Good Mourning
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Theresa Caputo, TLC’s Long Island Medium and the three-time New York Times best-selling author, teaches us how to ritualize and recover from the daily losses in our lives.
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Another great book by Theresa Caputo
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By: Theresa Caputo
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I Don't Have to Make Everything All Better
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In their weekly radio show and in their popular workshops, Gary and Joy Lundberg have already helped thousands of people and their families to communicate more effectively. Now, the Lundbergs address an all too common dilemma that arises when others expect you to solve their problems for them, telling listeners how they can shed the no-win role of "fixer" and empower people to solve their own problems through validation - a simple yet profound communication tool that is essential to any healthy relationship.
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Emotional Intelligent!
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The Breakup Bible
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Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
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When Your Kid Is Hurting
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Children today live in an unpredictable, disruptive, and often violent world. Many of them live in two different homes with different sets of expectations. They face bullying at school and online. They hear news of school shootings, and racially or religiously motivated violence. They may have lost a friend or a loved one. As parents, the impulse to protect our children is strong, but that very protection can end up handicapping them for life. Rather than seek to save them from the hard things, parents must teach their kids how to cope with and rise above their problems.
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So helpful for so many situations
- By Natalie on 10-03-18
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How Can I Forgive You?
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Until now, we have been taught that forgiveness is good for us and that good people forgive. Dr. Spring, a gifted therapist and the award-winning author of After the Affair, proposes a radical, life-affirming alternative that lets us overcome the corrosive effects of hate and get on with our lives - without forgiving. She also offers a powerful and unconventional model for genuine forgiveness - one that asks as much of the offender as it does of us.
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I'm a Christian
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Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
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The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the 20 complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love.
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The glass is half empty.
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unbelievable ....not in a good way.
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opened up my eyes a bit
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Parents whose adult children have cut off contact wonder: How did this happen? Where did I go wrong? What happened to my loving child? Over time, holidays, birthdays, and even the birth of grandchildren may pass in silence. Anguish may turn into anger. While time, in and of itself, does not necessarily heal, actions do, and while every estrangement includes situation-specific variables, there are practical, effective, and universal techniques for understanding and healing these not-uncommon breaches.
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Not worth tour time...
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In Done with the Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children, Sheri McGregor, MA, helps parents break free from emotional pain - and move forward in their own lives. As a loving mother to whom the unthinkable happened, McGregor knows the horrible shock that wrings a parent dry, triggers denial, blame, anger, and shame. With empathy and understanding, as well as tools, the latest research, and insight from more than 9,000 parents of estranged adult children, McGregor helps parents of estranged adults plan, prepare for emotional triggers, and prevail over pain.
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A 43 page book written to encourage the estranged parent. The Bible speaks at length of two kinds of estrangement. Two different paths that got there, and two different paths to get out. Both David and the Prodigal Father faced estrangement from their adult child. Support, advice, and encouragement "in the waiting". Written by an estranged mother.
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Required Reading
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Beyond Done with the Crying
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For any parent of estranged adult children, reconciling may be a solo sport. Even when reconciliations do occur, their success requires wisdom and strength. That's why it's so important to empower yourself, make positive changes, and reclaim your life, even while waiting and continuing to reach out (if you choose to). Beyond Done with the Crying: More Answers and Advice for Parents of Estranged Adult Children is filled with information and solutions to the complex, real-life problems that plague parents of estranged adult children and their families.
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Insightful
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A Kidnapped Mind
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From age five Dash suffered Parental Alienation Syndrome at the hands of his father. Indoctrinated to believe his mother had abandoned him, after years of monitored phone calls and impeded access eight-year-old Dash decided he didn't want to be "forced" to visit her at all; later he told her he would never see her again if she took the case to court. But he didn't count on his indefatigable mother's fierce love. For eight more years Pamela battled Dash's father, the legal system, their psychologist, the school system, and Dash himself to try and protect her son - first from his father, then from himself.
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Heartbreaking, Eye-Opening, and Empowering!
- By kelly on 11-04-13
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Estranged
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In Estranged: Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart, Julie Plagens shares about her life as a child of well-known restauranteur parents who also owned the first nightclub in Texas. After ten years in the entertainment business, her parents made a public conversion to Christianity and went into full-time ministry. Unfortunately, the hardships of maintaining a perfect image as a Christian family became too heavy of a burden due to anger and unforgiveness. After a life-altering health diagnosis (Crohn's disease), Julie, her husband, and their two children walked away from the family to ...
By: Julie Plagens
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Rules of Estrangement
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Labeled a silent epidemic by a growing number of therapists and researchers, estrangement is one of the most disorienting and painful experiences of a parent's life. Popular opinion typically tells a one-sided story of parents who got what they deserved or overly entitled adult children who wrongly blame their parents. However, the reasons for estrangement are far more complex and varied.
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Excellent book for the parent's perspective
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Parental Alienation Survival Coach: Healing, humor, heart, poetry, prayers, verses, self-care and my 6-step program to be better, not bitter!
- By: Monica Giglio
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Family separation. Kids are separated from good, law abiding, American parents and others all over the world every day through "Family Court" systems. Can you imagine what it’s like to NOT have the phone number, address, or email of your own children, and be blocked from all forms of social media? You can, if you are an alienated, erased, or amputated parent. Do you know what it’s like to enter your own child’s name into an internet search to satisfy your natural urge to know if they are dead or alive?
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it was ok.
- By Debbie Kinsey on 03-17-20
By: Monica Giglio
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The Invisible Parent
- The Dark Art of Parental Alienation
- By: anonymous, Andrew Keith Walker
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Cafcass defines parental alienation as "when a child’s resistance or hostility towards one parent is not justified and is the result of psychological manipulation by the other parent", yet experts, therapists, and social workers are not trained to assess or deal with cases involving it. I spent years making my case to judges, experts, and lawyers, all of whom failed to agree on what was actually happening between my ex-wife, my kids, and myself. At the time, it seemed like I was constantly trying to prove a negative, and all paths ended in dead ends as my ex-wife pursued her agenda.
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Repetitive, whiney, and no hook
- By Jarod Toffelmire on 06-03-24
By: anonymous, and others
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Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children
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- By: Allison Bottke
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A tough-love guide to coping with dysfunctional adult children, Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children will empower families by offering hope and healing through S.A.N.I.T.Y. - a six-step program to help parents regain control in their homes and in their lives.
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Way too Religious, thinking about returning it.
- By Mickerj on 10-20-16
By: Allison Bottke
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Banished
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For author Nancy Lee Klune, the nightmare began with a phone call from a stranger. The man, who identified himself as a family therapist, informed her that her son and daughter-in-law had decided that she was to have no further contact with them or their four children. This call set in motion a 10-year journey of deep pain, emotional turmoil, and personal growth as she found ways to cope with this indescribable loss.
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Instead of Hope it’s a Heavy Heart
- By Britt on 10-13-22
By: Nancy Lee Klune
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Fault Lines
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- By: Karl Pillemer Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Sean Pratt
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Estrangement from a family member is one of the most painful life experiences. It is devastating not only to the individuals directly involved - collateral damage can extend upward, downward, and across generations. More than 65 million Americans suffer such rifts, yet little guidance exists on how to cope with and overcome them. In this book, Karl Pillemer combines the advice of people who have successfully reconciled with powerful insights from social science research. The result is a unique guide to mending fractured families.
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Estrangement can be avoided and healed. There’s hope.
- By Augusta Olaore on 01-11-24
What listeners say about Surviving Parental Alienation
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- MillerMom 2020
- 04-02-20
it touch my broken heart
I felt so isolated before I read this book. I didn't know there was a name for what was happening with my children and me.
I learned a lot.
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- Amber
- 05-02-20
We love our kids too. We are not alone. We are not “crazy”.
Thank you for writing this book and for raising awareness about parental alienation. As a lawyer, it is very difficult for me to advocate for these situations as the courts do not understand the family dynamics and mental pathology of a parent that alienates another. Time and time again, the alienated parent is blamed and it is an abuse cycle that continues. This is an Excellent book for any parent who is going through a divorce or separation wanting to learn what to do or not to do to avoid destroying yours or your spouses bond with your child (even unintentionally), or anyone experiencing a threat to loss off parental bonds, anyone who is in the field to help this group. No one can begin to understand how it feels to experience something so corrupt meant to intentionally destroy parent child relationship. The worst part is that alienation abuse tactics are not obvious to anyone else (on the outside) making it hard to believe it could be “that bad”. I have read all of Lundy Bancroft’s books and this one ranks up there! Excellent read. Please write more on this topic! A much needed topic with an obvious research gap right now is specifically loss of maternal child bonds in domestic violence abuse, coercive control, Ect- with battering parents given custody and control of children as a way to continue battering through the children, specifically focusing on destroying maternal child bonds. The way the Courts and GALs are currently most respecting “parental alienation” research and literature is when it is listed under alternative descriptive terms such as “maternal child deprivation”, (psychology verbiage often appears to be widely misrepresented and or misunderstood). Please write more!!!
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- KILLA
- 02-18-22
NOTHING BUT THE TOTAL TRUTH !
THIS WAS AN AWESOME TOPIC
I COULD RELATE TO EVERY SINGLE THONG BEING
AS IM AILINATED PARENT
THOS ISBVERY UPSETTING TO HEAR , BUT VERY TRUTHFUL, ABD LEANING FULL FORNOUR FUTURE CHILDREN
WHONNEEDNTONBE TAUGHT THIS
THIS IS CHILD ABUSE ATBITS FINEST
SOMETHING NEEDS TO BE DONE ABOUT THIS
ASAP !
BECAUSE THESE POOR CHILD BEING USED AS PAWNS ARW GROWING UP TO BE VERY DISFUNCTIONAL ADULTS
AND THESE PARENTS THAT ARE DOING THIS TO THEIR NEED TO BE LOCKED AWAY
ONCE AGAIN CHILD ABUSE AT ITS FINEST
ROBBING THEEES CHILD OF THEIR CHILHOOD AND OTHER PARENT WHO
THEY
ONLY A MONSTER WOULD STOOP TO THESE
LEVELS
MAKESE SICK !
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- Heather Ann Hess-Lindquist
- 02-19-20
Parental Alienation Survivor Hope!
If you are a survivor of parental alienation, currently going through it, or a professional who has a client suffering from it, I highly recommend this book. If I had had this book or a single person who understood what I was going through when my children were alienated from me it would have made all of the difference in the world. Please share it with others who are suffering and need hope.
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- bp
- 10-23-24
Touching, no parent deserves such alienation :(
Wake up call as to what they are upto after a high conflict divorce (HCP)
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- Gregory Estadt
- 03-27-20
Heartbreaking and Realistic
As a victim of parental alienation, I found this book insightful and informative. Unfortunately, it offers limited hope for overcoming the alienation that I and so many others have experienced. There is a chapter on interventions, which have inspired some action on my part but, again, the reality with these horrible situations is that A LOT of damage can be done by the alienating family member. Dr. Bakers scholarship is clear both in this book, as well as in her many YouTube presentations. If you are struggling with this syndrome, you might want to look at the section on interventions first as well as join one of the many online and in-person support groups.
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- Shayne
- 05-19-22
Spot on & truly helpful!
Finally a book that describes every aspect of what I’ve experienced in this torturous process. Hopefully, there will be closure and again I will find a version of the wonderful relationship I once had with my daughter.
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- Don
- 08-02-24
Everything
this book has helped me take off significant load of stress and anxiety by having some rational way to understand identify with the name plus also preparing to go to fight I understand it's a marathon and not a regular race
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- Lana
- 04-07-21
A wealth of information and helpful to hear about the crazymaking others experience
Parental alienation has been my worst nightmare, and I’m trying to accept and prepare for the long haul of it. Grieving the different pieces of it is intense. Knowing and hearing that I’m doing most everything I can and gathering logical recommendations has been so beneficial for me. I will read more of Amy Baker’s writings!
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- Destinie n.
- 03-07-21
Yes!!
Opened ny eyes to my own reality!! Eager to use this book as a reference!!
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