The Compassionate Mind
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Narrated by:
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Rupert Farley
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By:
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Paul Gilbert
About this listen
Throughout history people have sought to cope with a life that is often stressful and hard. We have actually known for some time that developing compassion for oneself and others can help us face up to and win through the hardship and find a sense of inner peace. However in modern societies we rarely focus on this key process that underpins successful coping and happiness and can be quick to dismiss the impact of modern living on our minds and well-being. Instead we concentrate on 'doing, achieving' and having'. Now, bestselling author and leading authority on depression, Professor Paul Gilbert explains how new research shows how we can all learn to develop compassion for ourselves and others and derive the benefits of this age-old wisdom.
In this ground-breaking new book he explores how our minds have developed to be highly sensitive and quick to react to perceived threats and how this fast-acting threat-response system can be a source of anxiety, depression and aggression. He describes how studies have also shown that developing kindness and compassion for self and others can help in calming down the threat system: as a mother's care and love can soothe a baby's distress, so we can learn how to soothe ourselves. Not only does compassion help to soothe distressing emotions, it actually increases feelings of contentment and well-being. Here, Professor Gilbert outlines the latest findings about the value of compassion and how it works, and takes readers through basic mind training exercises to enhance the capacity for, and use of, compassion.
New audio available from 01 August 2018.
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Critic reviews
"As somebody who suffers from severe depression, I know the depressive's harshest critic is themselves. It is never helpful to be told to pull ourselves together by others but saying it to ourselves leads us in only one direction - into a spiralling descent into despair. This wise and perceptive book teaches us self-compassion and the consolations of kindness. I recommend it all the time." (Sally Brampton, author of Shoot the Damn Dog: A Memoir of Depression and the Aunt Sally column in The Sunday Times)
"The increasing drive to find a competitive edge in all aspects of our lives may create efficiencies but they are cold, heartless and unpleasant to live with. Gilbert shows how and why this occurs, and explains why our capacity for compassion is the antidote." (Oliver James, author of Affluenza and the Selfish Capitalist)
"A timely book for a time when competitiveness, materialism and narcissism have failed us. This book provides timeless wisdom that you can use every day. It will make a wonderful gift for someone you care for - especially, if you give it to yourself." (Robert L Leahy, author of The Worry Cure and President Of The International Association For Cognitive Psychotherapy)
"Fascinating...thoughtful and well written...this book is a resource to be owned and used with enjoyment." (Nursing Standard)
"A challenging and useful addition to anyone's self-help shelf, as well as a refreshingly rigorous look behind why our brains work the way they do. In fact, this is a self-help book for people who don't like self-help books." (ONEinFOUR magazine)
"Important and enjoyable." (The Psychologist)
"A landmark book" (The Scientific and Medical Network)
"Interesting and helpful." (Mental Health Practice)
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Fierce Self-Compassion
- How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive
- By: Kristin Neff
- Narrated by: Jean Ann Douglass
- Length: 12 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compassion. Now, 10 years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Although kindness and self-acceptance allow us to be with ourselves as we are, in all our glorious imperfection, the desire to alleviate suffering at the heart of this mindset isn't always gentle, sometimes it's fierce.
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Liberal Activism distracting
- By Janiene on 07-26-21
By: Kristin Neff
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Rewire
- Change Your Brain to Break Bad Habits, Overcome Addictions, Conquer Self-Destructive Behavior
- By: Richard O'Connor Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Fred Stella
- Length: 10 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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We humans tend to get in our own way time and time again - whether it comes to not speaking up for ourselves, going back to bad romantic partners, our umpteenth diet, or engaging in any of a range of bad habits we just can’t seem to shake. In Rewire, renowned psychotherapist Richard O’Connor, PhD, reveals why our bad habits die so hard. We have two brains - one a thoughtful, conscious, deliberative self, and the other an automatic self that does most of the work without our attention.
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Meh
- By Grateful on 12-31-14
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Highly Intuitive People
- 7 Right-Brain Traits to Change the Lives of Intuitive-Sensitive People
- By: Heidi Sawyer
- Narrated by: Heidi Sawyer
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Do you struggle with small talk and prefer deep conversation? Are you extremely sensitive to other people's moods? Are you exhausted after being in busy places? If you've answered "yes" to any of the above questions, you may be a Highly Intuitive Person: someone who is especially sensitive to the energy of others. Highly Intuitive People, also known as Intuitive-Sensitives, are a refined group of sensitive people who are said to make up 15-20 per cent of the population.
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Wow!
- By Raubo on 07-01-22
By: Heidi Sawyer
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Uncovering Happiness
- Overcoming Depression with Mindfulness and Self-compassion
- By: Elisha Goldstein PhD
- Narrated by: Eric Michael Summerer
- Length: 7 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Most of us believe when we're depressed that our situation is hopeless. That's a mistake, Dr. Elisha Goldstein reassures us in Uncovering Happiness. The secret to overcoming depression and uncovering happiness is in harnessing our brain's own natural antidepressant power and ultimately creating a more resilient antidepressant brain.
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Great book, but focused on depression.
- By wrenekape on 03-22-15
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Brainstorm
- The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain
- By: Daniel J. Siegel M.D.
- Narrated by: Daniel J. Siegel M.D.
- Length: 10 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Between the ages of twelve and twenty-four, the brain changes in important and, at times, challenging ways. In Brainstorm, the renowned psychiatrist and bestselling author of Parenting from the Inside Out, The Whole-Brain Child, and Mindsight, Daniel Siegel busts a number of commonly held myths about adolescence — for example, that it is merely a stage of “immaturity” filled with often “crazy” behavior — to reveal how it is in fact a vital time in our lives in terms of charting the course for the adults we ultimately become.
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Narration for kindergarteners...
- By Kalutha on 03-28-14
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Emotional Chaos to Clarity
- How to Live More Skillfully, Make Better Decisions, and Find Purpose in Life
- By: Phillip Moffitt
- Narrated by: Fred Stella
- Length: 8 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Despite our best-laid plans, life can often be difficult, disappointing, and stressful. Consequently, when things don’t go right, we are often left in a state of emotional chaos, dealing with feelings like anger, anxiety, frustration, and doubt, which can cloud our perspective and negatively affect the way we live our lives. But in this inspiring book, Phillip Moffitt shows us that we need not be at the mercy of our emotions. By cultivating a responsive mind rather than a reactive one, we can achieve a state of emotional clarity.
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You Are Not Your Emotions
- By Sara on 10-23-14
By: Phillip Moffitt
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Taming Your Outer Child
- Overcoming Self-Sabotage and Healing from Abandonment
- By: Susan Anderson
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 9 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Chances are, you've already had run-ins with your Outer Child - the self-sabotaging, bungling, and impulsive part of your personality. This misguided, hidden nemesis blows your diet, overspends, and ruins your love life. Your Outer Child acts out and fulfills your legitimate childlike needs and wants in the wrong place, at the wrong time, and in counterproductive ways: It goes for immediate gratification and the quick fix in spite of your best-laid plans.
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Her voice made me cringe.
- By zoe on 02-15-21
By: Susan Anderson
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Buddhism for Mothers
- By: Sarah Napthali
- Narrated by: Rebecca Macauley
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Buddhism for Mothers explores the potential to be with your children in the all-important present moment; to gain the most joy out of being with them. How can this be done calmly and with a minimum of anger, worry and negative thinking? How can mothers negotiate the changed conditions of their relationships with partners, family and even with friends? Using Buddhist practices, Sarah Napthali offers ways of coping with the day-to-day challenges of motherhood.
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Focusing on negative didn't help me...
- By Sarah on 04-04-11
By: Sarah Napthali
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The Smart Girl's Guide to Self-Care
- A Savvy Guide to Help Young Women Flourish, Thrive and Conquer
- By: Shahida Arabi
- Narrated by: Julie McKay
- Length: 5 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you in an abusive or unhappy relationship? Do you try too hard to please your friends at the expense of your own needs and wants? Are you subservient to others and do you find yourself unable to become independent? Do you suffer from negative self-talk? These are all signs that your self-care regimen is deficient in some way. The Smart Girl's Guide to Self-Care tackles the common problems of effective self-care with practical suggestions for practices that will create a sustainable, lifelong self-care routine.
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Very helpful
- By Joan Sarratt on 03-08-18
By: Shahida Arabi
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Real Happiness at Work
- Meditations for Accomplishment, Achievement, and Peace
- By: Sharon Salzberg
- Narrated by: Sharon Salzberg
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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How would you like to be calmer, less distracted, more productive, and more content at your job? You might think it would take more hours in the day, a better boss, more support, less interference, a shorter commute - and the list goes on. Most of the things we think would help are either not in our control or simply not realistic. But there is one thing we can do to achieve the qualities we seek, and it can be done invisibly and often: meditation.
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inspirational and totally useful
- By C. L. Campion on 10-21-15
By: Sharon Salzberg
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Self-Knowledge
- By: The School of Life
- Narrated by: Fiona Buckland
- Length: 1 hr and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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In Ancient Greece, when the philosopher Socrates was asked to sum up what all philosophical commandments could be reduced to, he replied: "Know yourself". Self-knowledge matters so much because it is only on the basis of an accurate sense of who we are that we can make reliable decisions - particularly around love and work. This book takes us on a journey into our deepest, most elusive selves and arms us with a set of tools to understand our characters properly.
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terrible voice
- By Tina Crosby on 08-27-20
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Curious?
- By: Todd Kashdan
- Narrated by: Todd Kashdan
- Length: 6 hrs and 4 mins
- Abridged
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Dead cats. That's the image many people conjure up when you mention curiosity. An image perpetuated by a dusty old proverb that has long represented the extent of our understanding of the term. This book might not put the proverb to rest, but it will flip it upside down: far from killing anything, curiosity breathes new life into almost everything it touches.
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Transformative & Engaging
- By Hans on 04-29-09
By: Todd Kashdan
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Slow, Simple, and Easy to Comprehend
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Why the Rich Are Getting Richer
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It’s Robert Kiyosaki’s position that, “It is our educational system that causes the gap between the rich and everyone else.” He laid the foundation for many of his messages in the international best seller Rich Dad Poor Dad, the number one personal finance book of all time, and in Why the Rich Are Getting Richer, he makes his case.
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Finally, It has arrived!
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How to Be Alone
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Lane Moore is a rare performer who is as impressive onstage - whether hosting her iconic show Tinder Live or being the enigmatic front woman of It Was Romance - as she is on the page, as both a former writer for The Onion and an award-winning sex and relationships editor for Cosmopolitan. But her story has had its obstacles, including being her own parent, living in her car as a teenager, and moving to New York City to pursue her dreams. Through it all, she looked to movies, TV, and music as the family and support systems she never had.
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Not a good book
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By: Lane Moore
What listeners say about The Compassionate Mind
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Joe
- 10-10-15
Such a splendid book!
Such a humanistic master pease! And also, in my layman mind, a very exiting summary, at least for the large audience, of many evolvements in modern psychiatry. But before all a brilliant and convincing presentation emphasizing the importance of the compassionate perspective not only in the caring professions and the education sectors but in all functions of the public as well as the private spheres of society. Also very well written and not without some elegant humor and charming self irony.
When an audiobook stretches over many hours I am
sometimes inclined to fast forward; just a little. But never in this Masterpiece even if more than 20 hours of audio normally could feel like a long piece of listening. And indeed it was so long so that I just made up my mind to read it in e-book form, before I listen to it the second time.
The narration was also very good.
Johan Landsdorff
Helsinki
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- Dorota
- 10-20-18
Longish, but well worth while
I found this discussion of compassion to be directed to the lay public: certainly people who have not given any thought to meditation or any other spiritual or mindful practice. It does offer a great, matter-of-fact perspective on the value of compassion, and many tools for making space for compassion in our minds and lives. I enjoyed listening to it, and plan to return to it in the future.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 01-11-20
best book ever
Most importent scripture for humanity,
I liston to it over and over, the wonderfull narrating helps me fall asleep in a compassionate mindset.
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- Amazon Customer
- 03-22-24
A wonderful book
Well-researched and written with heart. Paul Gilbert explains how we all just find ourselves here, with strange minds and unruly emotions, and how to begin to make sense of our predicament and treat ourselves and others with understanding and kindness. I loved the practical exercises, too. Great wisdom and warms in each chapter.
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- Anonymous User
- 02-02-24
The Compassionate mind
Great book that each person shoul read. Beautiful message to the world. Easy to understand, giving answers to most difficult questions.
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- Vickie
- 09-02-13
Like water for a thirsty wanderer
What did you love best about The Compassionate Mind?
The author's kindness and humor. He felt like a friend, helping me through difficult--but crucial--information that will help my life for years and years to come. I will always be grateful to him for this.
What was one of the most memorable moments of The Compassionate Mind?
A few things. When he mentioned other works by other authors (Napoleon Hill's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" which basically tells us to just LISTEN to each other; John Price's work; Mark Leary's book "The Curse of the Self"; and many more), I quite often took note of that for future looking into.
The author's book focuses on explaining complex ideas about self-compassion (and compassion for others) in easily-understood language, and to tell we the readers that we CAN attain this elusive and wonderful gift of self-compassion/other compassion.
The gold in this book, which was repeated in many different ways throughout the book (helping me to understand it from different angles and within different contexts), THE THEME UPON WHICH THIS BOOK IS WRITTEN, is that it isn't our fault that we are critical or judgmental toward ourselves or others, or might feel superior/inferior, OR that we suffer from anxiety, fear, anger, or depression. Further--and what really brings it home for me--is that it is natural to feel a sudden flood of anxiety, fear, or a feeling of anger or wanting to exact revenge. AND that, because of how our brains have evolved, it is also natural for us to ruminate on these momentary feelings for days, months, and even years. It is also natural to feel a wide spectrum of feelings. They are not the enemies. What IS important is being aware of them and dealing with them so they don't overtake your life (like my reference to rumination--which is only one example).
In a phrase, he wants us to "experience rather than self-judge/judge others"; to be kind, loving, self-compassionate/compassionate, and warm towards ourselves and others. His full chapters, coming at the subject from many angles, and his exercises teach us how to do this.
This is not a difficult, scientifically-slanted book, though it is grounded firmly in science. It is also not a spiritual book per se, though you can certainly come at it from that angle, should you enjoy that. It is just, plain and simple, a very, very practical book. It doesn't throw around any far-flinging (what I call) "woo-woo" terms which other books might. It's real. It's down to earth. It's usable in everyday life.
He gave hope to this reader.
I feel more hope now, after hearing this book (which I'll be restarting at the beginning as soon as I've finished the first go-through, and I'm going to listen to it again and again) than I have in three decades of anti-depressants, anti-anxiety meds, and therapies with dozens of philosophies and advice.
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
As others have stated, this book is very long. But it is, by no means, too long--for all of its in-depth coverage of vital (and in my view life-saving) information. There is nothing I would have edited out to cut down the length. I have been listening to it in 3-4 blocks of time. But you could easily listen to it in one-hour increments or full day's-worth segments of time.
Any additional comments?
Buy this book, and then let it wash over you, confront your prior attitudes and opinions, and amaze you. His book is tightly focused, well-planned and executed, and practical for novices and experienced alike! I'm going to look for more by this author.
As a side note: this book is written by a British author, and the audio book is read by a British narrator. However, as an American, I had no trouble understanding every single word. In addition, I didn't have to strain to hear every single word with ease--the tone was even in volume and cadence throughout the entire piece.
Buy this book. It will make you feel so much better and more hopeful about yourself and your world than you could have ever imagined. I think these ideas are going to make a huge difference in my life as I begin to orient my gaze toward its premises, exercises, and practical applications.
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- Napoleon
- 11-13-18
Amazing!
Excellent book on compassion towards others and more importantly yourself. The author does a great job of walking you through the process of internal growth. Definitely a must have, there aren't many books that effectively help you combat shame as this one.
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- Krister
- 11-24-22
Important, but a bit long
Covers some very important and useful topics in how to be more helpful to your self. Some very important observations, but the book is a bit long over all.
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- Scott
- 09-20-13
Boring, boring, boring
I kept waiting for an insight—any insight—that wasn't just ridiculously obvious to surface in this book. Maybe you don't already know that our minds evolved from a more primitive base that doesn't always serve us well. Maybe you've never heard how to meditate. So, okay, go ahead and give it a listen. Personally, I recommend "Buddhism Without Beliefs" instead. It's much shorter, and doesn't get lost in (really) elaboration.
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