
The Modern Loss Handbook
An Interactive Guide to Moving Through Grief and Building Your Resilience
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
$0.99/mo for the first 3 months

Buy for $14.81
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Rebecca Soffer
-
By:
-
Rebecca Soffer
About this listen
Stay connected to your person, yourself, and the world around you in the aftermath of loss.
Modern Loss is all about eradicating the stigma and awkwardness around grief while also focusing on our capacity for resilience and finding meaning. In this interactive guide, Modern Loss cofounder Rebecca Soffer offers candid, practical, and witty advice for confronting a future without your person, honoring their memory, dealing with trigger days, managing your professional life, and navigating new and existing relationships. You’ll find no worn-out platitudes or empty assurances here. With prompts, creative projects, innovative rituals, therapeutic-based exercises, and more, this is the place to explore the messy, long arc of loss on your own timeline - and without judgment.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2022 Rebecca Soffer (P)2022 Running Press AdultListeners also enjoyed...
-
Modern Loss
- Candid Conversation About Grief. Beginners Welcome.
- By: Rebecca Soffer, Gabrielle Birkner
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell, Josh Bloomberg
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
At a time when we mourn public figures and national tragedies with hashtags, where intimate posts about loss go viral and we receive automated birthday reminders for dead friends, it's clear we are navigating new terrain without a road map. Let's face it: Most of us have always had a difficult time talking about death and sharing our grief. We're awkward and uncertain; we avoid, ignore, or even deny feelings of sadness; we offer platitudes; we send sympathy bouquets whittled out of fruit.
-
-
Not What I Was Expecting
- By Bessie Mae on 03-01-23
By: Rebecca Soffer, and others
-
The Light We Carry
- Overcoming in Uncertain Times
- By: Michelle Obama
- Narrated by: Michelle Obama
- Length: 9 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
There may be no tidy solutions or pithy answers to life’s big challenges, but Michelle Obama believes that we can all locate and lean on a set of tools to help us better navigate change and remain steady within flux. In The Light We Carry, she opens a frank and honest dialogue with listeners, considering the questions many of us wrestle with: How do we build enduring and honest relationships? How can we discover strength and community inside our differences? What tools do we use to address feelings of self-doubt or helplessness? What do we do when it all starts to feel like too much?
-
-
Very Disappointing—Too Ego-filled
- By Patricia Webb on 11-29-22
By: Michelle Obama
-
Healing After the Loss of Your Mother
- A Grief & Comfort Manual
- By: Elaine Mallon
- Narrated by: Jane Oppenheimer
- Length: 2 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Healing After the Loss of Your Mother is a heartfelt and practical guidebook for those mourning the loss of their mother and for supporters hoping to help a loved one through the grief. Like a compassionate friend, author Elaine Mallon captures the raw, unique pain of losing your mother with empathy, honesty, and eloquence. She tenderly walks the listener through each step of the grieving process, offering straightforward answers to many common questions and addressing fears faced by those grieving, as well.
-
-
Helpful to hear even 3 months later
- By Tina B on 06-15-21
By: Elaine Mallon
-
It's OK That You're Not OK
- Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn't Understand
- By: Megan Devine
- Narrated by: Megan Devine
- Length: 7 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Megan Devine offers a profound new approach to both the experience of grief and the way we help others who have endured tragedy. Having experienced grief from both sides - as both a therapist and as a woman who witnessed the accidental drowning of her beloved partner - Megan writes with deep insight about the unspoken truths of loss, love, and healing.
-
-
The author of this book is capital-A Angry
- By A. E. Ober on 08-26-20
By: Megan Devine
-
The Dead Moms Club
- A Memoir About Death, Grief, and Surviving the Mother of All Losses
- By: Kate Spencer
- Narrated by: Kate Spencer
- Length: 6 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Kate Spencer lost her mom to cancer when she was 27. In The Dead Moms Club, she walks listeners through her experience of stumbling through grief and loss and helps them to get through it, too. This isn't a weepy, sentimental story but rather a frank, up-front look at what it means to go through gruesome grief and come out on the other side.
-
-
Wow!! What language!!
- By Tammy Hone on 09-15-20
By: Kate Spencer
-
Finding Me
- A Memoir
- By: Viola Davis
- Narrated by: Viola Davis
- Length: 9 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In my book, you will meet a little girl named Viola who ran from her past until she made a life-changing decision to stop running forever. This is my story, from a crumbling apartment in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to the stage in New York City, and beyond. This is the path I took to finding my purpose but also my voice in a world that didn’t always see me.
-
-
Absolutely beautifully Written❤️
- By Love bug23 on 05-02-22
By: Viola Davis
-
Modern Loss
- Candid Conversation About Grief. Beginners Welcome.
- By: Rebecca Soffer, Gabrielle Birkner
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell, Josh Bloomberg
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
At a time when we mourn public figures and national tragedies with hashtags, where intimate posts about loss go viral and we receive automated birthday reminders for dead friends, it's clear we are navigating new terrain without a road map. Let's face it: Most of us have always had a difficult time talking about death and sharing our grief. We're awkward and uncertain; we avoid, ignore, or even deny feelings of sadness; we offer platitudes; we send sympathy bouquets whittled out of fruit.
-
-
Not What I Was Expecting
- By Bessie Mae on 03-01-23
By: Rebecca Soffer, and others
-
The Light We Carry
- Overcoming in Uncertain Times
- By: Michelle Obama
- Narrated by: Michelle Obama
- Length: 9 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
There may be no tidy solutions or pithy answers to life’s big challenges, but Michelle Obama believes that we can all locate and lean on a set of tools to help us better navigate change and remain steady within flux. In The Light We Carry, she opens a frank and honest dialogue with listeners, considering the questions many of us wrestle with: How do we build enduring and honest relationships? How can we discover strength and community inside our differences? What tools do we use to address feelings of self-doubt or helplessness? What do we do when it all starts to feel like too much?
-
-
Very Disappointing—Too Ego-filled
- By Patricia Webb on 11-29-22
By: Michelle Obama
-
Healing After the Loss of Your Mother
- A Grief & Comfort Manual
- By: Elaine Mallon
- Narrated by: Jane Oppenheimer
- Length: 2 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Healing After the Loss of Your Mother is a heartfelt and practical guidebook for those mourning the loss of their mother and for supporters hoping to help a loved one through the grief. Like a compassionate friend, author Elaine Mallon captures the raw, unique pain of losing your mother with empathy, honesty, and eloquence. She tenderly walks the listener through each step of the grieving process, offering straightforward answers to many common questions and addressing fears faced by those grieving, as well.
-
-
Helpful to hear even 3 months later
- By Tina B on 06-15-21
By: Elaine Mallon
-
It's OK That You're Not OK
- Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn't Understand
- By: Megan Devine
- Narrated by: Megan Devine
- Length: 7 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Megan Devine offers a profound new approach to both the experience of grief and the way we help others who have endured tragedy. Having experienced grief from both sides - as both a therapist and as a woman who witnessed the accidental drowning of her beloved partner - Megan writes with deep insight about the unspoken truths of loss, love, and healing.
-
-
The author of this book is capital-A Angry
- By A. E. Ober on 08-26-20
By: Megan Devine
-
The Dead Moms Club
- A Memoir About Death, Grief, and Surviving the Mother of All Losses
- By: Kate Spencer
- Narrated by: Kate Spencer
- Length: 6 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Kate Spencer lost her mom to cancer when she was 27. In The Dead Moms Club, she walks listeners through her experience of stumbling through grief and loss and helps them to get through it, too. This isn't a weepy, sentimental story but rather a frank, up-front look at what it means to go through gruesome grief and come out on the other side.
-
-
Wow!! What language!!
- By Tammy Hone on 09-15-20
By: Kate Spencer
-
Finding Me
- A Memoir
- By: Viola Davis
- Narrated by: Viola Davis
- Length: 9 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In my book, you will meet a little girl named Viola who ran from her past until she made a life-changing decision to stop running forever. This is my story, from a crumbling apartment in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to the stage in New York City, and beyond. This is the path I took to finding my purpose but also my voice in a world that didn’t always see me.
-
-
Absolutely beautifully Written❤️
- By Love bug23 on 05-02-22
By: Viola Davis
-
Finding Meaning
- The Sixth Stage of Grief
- By: David Kessler
- Narrated by: David Kessler
- Length: 10 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In this groundbreaking new work, David Kessler - an expert on grief and the coauthor with Elisabeth Kübler-Ross of the iconic On Grief and Grieving - journeys beyond the classic five stages to discover a sixth stage: meaning.
-
-
paying it forward
- By Sandra Sena on 07-11-20
By: David Kessler
-
Spare
- By: Prince Harry The Duke of Sussex
- Narrated by: Prince Harry The Duke of Sussex
- Length: 15 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It was one of the most searing images of the twentieth century: two young boys, two princes, walking behind their mother’s coffin as the world watched in sorrow—and horror. As Princess Diana was laid to rest, billions wondered what Prince William and Prince Harry must be thinking and feeling—and how their lives would play out from that point on.
-
-
Gutterball!
- By Jimmyjoejangles on 01-10-23
-
On Grief and Grieving
- By: Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, David Kessler
- Narrated by: David Kessler, Samantha Desz
- Length: 8 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
On Death and Dying began as a theoretical book, an interdisciplinary study of our fear of death and our inevitable acceptance of it. It introduced the world to the now-famous five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. On Grief and Grieving applies these stages to the process of grieving and weaves together theory, inspiration, and practical advice, all based on Kübler-Ross' and Kessler's professional and personal experiences.
-
-
If you fear death after loss, DON'T READ.
- By wrinkled sheets on 07-06-21
By: Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, and others
-
I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye
- Surviving, Coping, and Healing After the Sudden Death of a Loved One
- By: Brook Noel, Pamela D. Blair Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Ellen Archer
- Length: 9 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Tapping their personal histories and drawing on numerous interviews, authors Brook Noel and Pamela D. Blair, Ph.D., explore unexpected death and its role in the cycle of life. I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye provides survivors with a rock-steady anchor from which to weather the storm of pain and begin to rebuild their lives.
-
-
Best Grief Book yet
- By Paul F. on 08-02-14
By: Brook Noel, and others
-
The Grieving Brain
- The Surprising Science of How We Learn from Love and Loss
- By: Mary-Frances O'Connor
- Narrated by: Callie Beaulieu
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Based on O’Connor’s own trailblazing neuroimaging work, research in the field, and her real-life stories, The Grieving Brain combines storytelling, accessible science, and practical knowledge that will help us better understand what happens when we grieve and how to navigate loss with more ease and grace.
-
-
Interesting thoughts
- By GAD on 03-12-22
-
No Happy Endings
- A Memoir
- By: Nora McInerny
- Narrated by: Nora McInerny
- Length: 7 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
No Happy Endings is an audiobook for people living life after life has fallen apart. It’s an audiobook for people who know they’re moving forward, not moving on. It’s an audiobook for people who know life isn’t always happy, but it isn’t the end: There will be unimaginable joy and incomprehensible tragedy. As Nora reminds us, there will be no happy endings - but there will be new beginnings.
-
-
Puts it together
- By Amazon Customer on 04-30-19
By: Nora McInerny
-
The Rainbow Comes and Goes
- A Mother and Son on Life, Love, and Loss
- By: Anderson Cooper
- Narrated by: Anderson Cooper, Gloria Vanderbilt
- Length: 6 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Though Anderson Cooper has always considered himself close to his mother, his intensely busy career as a journalist for CNN and CBS affords him little time to spend with her. After she suffers a brief but serious illness at the age of ninety-one, they resolve to change their relationship by beginning a yearlong conversation unlike any they have ever had before. The result is a correspondence of surprising honesty and depth in which they discuss their lives, the things that matter to them, and what they still want to learn about each other.
-
-
Enjoyed the early parts
- By Dedrick on 07-06-16
By: Anderson Cooper
-
Rising Strong
- How the Ability to Reset Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead
- By: Brené Brown
- Narrated by: Brené Brown
- Length: 8 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Social scientist Brené Brown has ignited a global conversation on courage, vulnerability, shame, and worthiness. Her pioneering work uncovered a profound truth: Vulnerability—the willingness to show up and be seen with no guarantee of outcome—is the only path to more love, belonging, creativity, and joy. But living a brave life is not always easy: We are, inevitably, going to stumble and fall.
-
-
A Gem, But Not Her Best
- By Gillian on 08-26-15
By: Brené Brown
-
Bad Vibes Only
- (And Other Things I Bring to the Table)
- By: Nora McInerny
- Narrated by: Nora McInerny
- Length: 5 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Nora McInerny does not dance like no one is watching. In fact, she dances like everyone is watching, which is to say, she does not dance at all. As a best-selling author and host of the beloved podcast Terrible, Thanks for Asking, she has captured the hearts of millions by discussing grief and loss with wit and warmth. Now, with Bad Vibes Only, she turns her eye on our aggressively, oppressively optimistic culture, our obsession with self-improvement, and what it really means to live our lives online.
-
-
A different but still good one from Nora
- By TJG on 05-28-23
By: Nora McInerny
-
Grief Is Love
- Living with Loss
- By: Marisa Renee Lee
- Narrated by: Marisa Renee Lee
- Length: 4 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Grief is Love, author Marisa Renee Lee reveals that healing does not mean moving on after losing a loved one—healing means learning to acknowledge and create space for your grief. It is about learning to love the one you lost with the same depth, passion, joy, and commitment you did when they were alive, perhaps even more. She guides you through the pain of grief—whether you’ve lost the person recently or long ago—and shows you what it looks like to honor your loss on your unique terms, and debunks the idea of a grief stages or timelines.
-
-
Self-Absorbed Politically-Correct Drivel
- By mf on 09-05-22
By: Marisa Renee Lee
-
I'm Still with You
- Communicate, Heal & Evolve with Your Loved One on the Other Side
- By: Sherrie Dillard
- Narrated by: Ann Richardson
- Length: 7 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Our loved ones are still with us even after they've passed to the other side. Psychic Medium Sherrie Dillard shares dozens of amazing case studies that show how the power of love transcends the veil between this world and the next. You will also discover exercises and meditations for healing grief and continuing the soul journey you are on with your family and friends who have passed away.
-
-
A Blessing on a very dark day
- By Kitzowyn on 08-13-20
By: Sherrie Dillard
-
I'm Not a Mourning Person
- Braving Loss, Grief, and the Big Messy Emotions That Happen When Life Falls Apart
- By: Kris Carr
- Narrated by: Kris Carr
- Length: 6 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
A few years ago, Kris Carr’s world was falling apart. Her father was dying, she had to pivot her business because of the pandemic, and she was on the verge of reaching her twenty-year milestone of living with an incurable Stage IV cancer diagnosis. While sitting in a CVS parking lot, she broke down, finally allowing herself to feel the massive stress and sadness she had been suppressing in order to seem strong for those around her, and for herself.
-
-
Absolutely love this one!!!
- By Chris Bargas on 02-20-24
By: Kris Carr
Critic reviews
“Please, dear God, let this be handed out with the crappy (or fancy!) white wines at wakes, life celebrations, shivas, and/or funerals. It could and will change lives.” (Erin Lee Carr, author of All That You Leave Behind: A Memoir and filmmaker, Britney vs. Spears)
“The Modern Loss Handbook is a rare achievement: candid, funny, wise, useful. And best of all, it’s filled with tools to help us face grief without the puffy, well-meaning blah blah blah that we grievers are always hearing. Rebecca is one of us, and she writes like it.” (Michael Cruz Kayne, writer for The Late Show with Stephen Colbert and host of the A Good Cry podcast)
“Like a pal who listens to you vent and makes you laugh in equal measure, The Modern Loss Handbook is comforting, thoughtful, and the perfect amount of irreverent. Each gently posed question and biting anecdote is a reminder that however shriveled by grief readers may feel, they’re not alone, and they’re going to be okay (mostly). This handbook is just what I needed when my mom died, and I’m so glad it exists now. A hundred times better than a condolence card.” (Tyler Feder, author of Dancing at the Pity Party)
What listeners say about The Modern Loss Handbook
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- LovesGreatTales
- 02-20-25
A wise and witty guide; helped me immensely
Sometimes you need a break from both pithy Instagram influencer reels and long, didactic "expert" reads. Both have ways of making you confidently feel like you're doing something wildly "wrong." And when it comes to grief, feeling like you're doing it wrong is truly NOT the feeling you need -- at least, not for me. I loved this book so much for just that reason, which didn't really surprise me because I've been a fan of Modern Loss for years.
Rebecca Soffer makes it clear at the top that in grief, we're all experts, muddling our way through something that has no set correct roadmap outside of not hurting yourself or anyone else in the process. She has a way with approaching a topic that still freaks me out even though I live with my losses every damn day and somehow making me feel more comfortable and fascinated by it...and even finding myself laughing occasionally?! A friend gave me the hardcover version, which I enjoy because of the ability to use it in any order whatsoever – lots of wonderful ideas for rituals, physical/emotional/psychological self-care (from formal therapies to DIY), and an enormously helpful section on how to know when and how to lay down boundaries and when and how to pull people in. But I bought the audiobook because I have long car commutes (it's also my only real alone time away from my young kids during the week) and found that I actually prefer it. Rebecca's voice is warm and her tone is interesting, like the keeping-it-real friend you need in an intimate space and who knows exactly when you need a well-timed dark giggle. Highly recommend!
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Jill Taylor
- 01-06-23
A warm and valuable resource
I found this book to be the connection to grief work that I've needed. I lost my dad in 2022, and 2023 marks 20 years since my mother died. The stories and resources are so practical. I'll be making my way through the workbook, writing about my loved ones and exploring what they mean to me. I'll listen to this one again.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful