
The Vampire's Mail Order Bride
Nocturne Falls, Book 1
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Narrated by:
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B.J. Harrison
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By:
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Kristen Painter
About this listen
Welcome to Nocturne Falls, the town that celebrates Halloween 365 days a year.
The tourists think it's all a show: the vampires, the werewolves, the witches, the occasional gargoyle flying through the sky. But the supernaturals populating the town know better.
Living in Nocturne Falls means being yourself. Fangs, fur, and all.
After seeing her maybe-mobster boss murder a guy, Delaney James assumes a new identity and pretends to be a mail order bride. She finds her groom-to-be living in a town that celebrates Halloween every day. Weird. But not as weird as what she doesn't know. Her groom-to-be is a 400-year-old vampire.
Hugh Ellingham has only agreed to the arranged setup to make his overbearing grandmother happy. In 30 days, whatever bridezilla shows up at his door will be escorted right back out. His past means love is no longer an option. Not if the woman's going to have a future. Except he never counted on Delaney and falling in love for real.
Too bad both of them are keeping some mighty big secrets....
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Story
When 49-year-old Belladonna Barrone’s mobbed-up husband does her the favor of dying in a car accident, she thinks she’s finally free of the crime family she unwittingly married into. Then the boss tells her that she has to complete her husband’s last job before that freedom is truly hers. No big deal, she figures. Until things go south in ways she never imagined. Suddenly she’s thrust into a whole new world that makes the mob look like kindergarten. Vampires and werewolves are real? How is that freaking possible?
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Meh
- By Amazon Customer on 05-14-20
By: Kristen Painter
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Blood Rights
- House of Comarré, Book 1
- By: Kristen Painter
- Narrated by: Abby Craden
- Length: 10 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Born into a life of secrets and service, Chrysabelle's body bears the telltale marks of a comarré - a special race of humans bred to feed vampire nobility. When her patron is murdered, she becomes the prime suspect, which sends her running into the mortal world... and into the arms of Malkolm, an outcast vampire cursed to kill every being from whom he drinks. Now, Chrysabelle and Malkolm must work together to stop a plot to merge the mortal and supernatural worlds.
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A Good Book that no one knows about
- By Sheri on 11-15-12
By: Kristen Painter
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How Knot to Marry a Vampire: A Nocturne Falls Universe Story
- By: Laurie London
- Narrated by: B.J. Harrison
- Length: 3 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Penelope Bechtel comes from a long line of mediums, so she shouldn’t have been surprised to see a ghost for the first time at the Waffle Emporium. But the gift he gives her puts her in terrible danger and sends her on the run...right back to where she started: Nocturne Falls and - is that a nearly naked, gorgeous vampire?
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For those who love crochet, knitting and Nocturne<br />
- By Kindle Customer on 02-14-18
By: Laurie London
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Torrent Witches Cozy Mysteries Complete Box Set: Books 1-10
- By: Tess Lake
- Narrated by: Natalie Duke
- Length: 65 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Meet Harlow Torrent, part-time journalist and full-time Slip Witch and her crazy witch family in this ten-book cozy mystery box set.
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alright.
- By Rachel Marie on 11-12-22
By: Tess Lake
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The Accidental Werewolf
- Accidentally Friends, Book 1
- By: Dakota Cassidy
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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When Marty Andrews gets bitten by a mangy mutt while walking her teacup poodle, her blond hair darkens, the hair on her legs starts growing at an alarming rate, and her mood swings put her dream job as a sales rep for Bobbie-Sue Cosmetics in serious jeopardy. Then a drool-worthy man shows up at her door claiming that he accidentally bit Marty. And since he's a werewolf, she is now, too. Thinking Keegan Flaherty is clearly insane, Marty refuses to believe a word until a kidnapping makes her realize there's more at stake than just her highlights.
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Too much sex
- By CrunchySocks on 03-17-15
By: Dakota Cassidy
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Breathing Space
- Ellis McFadden Mysteries
- By: Kristen Painter
- Narrated by: Robyn Maryke
- Length: 6 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Step into the enigmatic world of the Athos—a vessel that blends the luxury of a cruise ship, the intrigue of a scientific research station, and the might of a military starship. Here, amidst the stars, you'll find Ellis McFadden, the ship’s head librarian, embarking on adventures she never anticipated this late in her career.
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A Little Different, and A Fantastic Read!
- By JeanniebeannieB on 02-03-25
By: Kristen Painter
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How To Marry a Millionaire Vampire
- Love at Stake, Book 1
- By: Kerrelyn Sparks
- Narrated by: Suzanne Cypress
- Length: 11 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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So what if he's a bit older and usually regards a human female as dinner, not a dinner date? Yes, Roman Draganesti is a vampire, but a vampire who lost one of his fangs sinking his teeth into something he shouldn't have. Now he has one night to find a dentist before his natural healing abilities close the wound, leaving him a lopsided eater for all eternity. Things aren't going well for Shanna Whelan either... After witnessing a gruesome murder by the Russian mafia, she's next on their hit list. And her career as a dentist appears to be on a downward spiral because she's afraid of blood.
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God's Blood these vampires are elf-like
- By Wrightaway on 04-28-11
By: Kerrelyn Sparks
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His Maker's Mark
- By: Kristen Painter
- Narrated by: B.J. Harrison
- Length: 2 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Annaleigh Bartow has one goal in mind. Save the last remaining examples of her grandfather’s stonemasonry work. Unfortunately, that work is part of an old hotel scheduled for demolition. And she’s not the only one out to get a piece of it. When her attempt is thwarted by some ruthless thugs, an unexpected hero comes to her rescue. One who both frightens and fascinates her. One who will change her life in ways she can’t imagine.
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Gargoyles more than legends
- By teddy on 04-03-24
By: Kristen Painter
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Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
- Half-Moon Hollow, Book 1
- By: Molly Harper
- Narrated by: Amanda Ronconi
- Length: 8 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Maybe it was the Shenanigans gift certificate that put her over the edge. When children's librarian and self-professed nice girl Jane Jameson is fired by her beastly boss and handed $25 in potato skins instead of a severance check, she goes on a bender that's sure to become Half Moon Hollow legend. On her way home, she's mistaken for a deer, shot, and left for dead.
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Refreshing take on the Paranormal Genre
- By Captain Skurvy on 02-21-10
By: Molly Harper
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Pasties and Poor Decisions
- By: Molly Harper
- Narrated by: Amanda Ronconi
- Length: 2 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Anastasia Villiers has hit rock bottom. And that rock is named Espoir Island. Abandoned by her disgraced investment banker husband who liquidated all of their assets and fled the country, Anastasia is left with nothing - except for Fishscale House, a broken-down Queen Anne in the Michigan hometown she swore she’d left for good. If Ana quickly renovates and flips the dilapidated building, she can get back to Manhattan and salvage her life. The problem? The only person on the island with historical renovation cred is Ned Fitzroy - Ana’s first love.
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Felt like I had already listened
- By Heather M. Stephenson on 11-25-21
By: Molly Harper
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The Witch Is Back
- By: Sophie H. Morgan
- Narrated by: Natalie Duke
- Length: 12 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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There’s nothing wrong with being a wallflower. Not to Emmaline Bluewater, anyway. Emma may have been born into witch society, but her days of trying to fit in where she doesn’t belong are over—they ended seven years ago, when the man she’d hoped to marry left town without a word. She’s much happier now, living a delightfully mundane human life in Chicago and running her bar, Toil and Trouble. Until Bastian Truenote walks through the door and announces that he wants her back.
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Like a warm hug
- By Amanda Tamborino on 09-13-23
By: Sophie H. Morgan
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Fashionably Dead
- By: Robyn Peterman
- Narrated by: Jessica Almasy
- Length: 12 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Vampyres don't exist. They absolutely do not exist. At least I didn't think they did 'til I tried to quit smoking and ended up Undead. Who in the hell did I screw over in a former life that my getting healthy equates with dead? Now I'm a Vampyre. Yes, we exist whether we want to or not. However, I have to admit, the perks aren't bad. My girls no longer jiggle, my ass is higher than a kite, and the latest Prada keeps finding its way to my wardrobe.
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Porn
- By Jo Mc on 05-11-17
By: Robyn Peterman
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Song of the Fae
- The Wildsong Series, Book 1
- By: Tricia O'Malley
- Narrated by: Amy Landon, Gary Furlong
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Imogen, captain of the Irish charter boat, Mystic Pirate, has little time for friends and doesn’t trust her lovers. Perhaps the real issue is that she can’t trust herself, as she hasn’t yet found a good explanation for why otherworldly images dance before her eyes. Half-convinced that she is one step away from losing her mind, just like her mother, Imogen prefers to spend her life at sea with the only family she knows—her crew members.
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Awesome as always!
- By Rebecca Swan-Byrd on 07-29-22
By: Tricia O'Malley
What listeners say about The Vampire's Mail Order Bride
Highly rated for:
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- Cheri
- 02-11-16
Loved It!....... It was Clean, Funny, and Sweet!
What made the experience of listening to The Vampire's Mail Order Bride the most enjoyable?
There are three things I really liked about this story.
1. The characters! I loved how both the main and supporting characters were developed. You also got a glimpse of the different characters that will be coming up in future stories.
2. Nocturne Falls - Halloween all year long! I loved this town and all the creative shops and holiday's.
3. The Plot - A funny light romance!
What about B.J. Harrison’s performance did you like?
B.J. Harrison performance was hands down one of the best I've listened to. I loved how each character had their own voice and accent and was easily distinguishable between the characters. He was also did a great job projecting inflection into the tone of the characters throughout the story.
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
Laughed, Laughed, and Laughed! :-)
I loved Delaney and her inter thoughts, her random chocolate facts, and her cat "Captain Underpants."
Any additional comments?
This was a fun story to listen to; it was clean, funny, and well written. I could easily listen to this story again and again!
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54 people found this helpful
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- Sharon Demond
- 05-20-16
NEW TELEVISION SHOW IN THE MAKINGS????
If you could sum up The Vampire's Mail Order Bride in three words, what would they be?
FRESH. COOL. AWESOME.
What did you like best about this story?
It was refreshing outlook on the supernatural. It was cool that there was "love" in the air, however, not an overabundance of sexual verbiage. Awesome because they have likable characters - ones that could be the making of a new TV show.
Which character – as performed by B.J. Harrison – was your favorite?
I am sorry, BJ Harrison was great in all the performances, I can't pick just one, although I really loved Hugh's Rook.
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
Yes!!
Any additional comments?
Not really, although I would suggest to Kristen Painter to seek out people in the Hollywood scene and pitch this as a possible show. I have listented (audio) to 4 of the books in this series and have just downloaded the 5th. This little town could be the next supernatural show success. I rest my case!
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9 people found this helpful
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- AnnieS
- 01-22-16
The Vampire's Mail Order Bride: Nocturne Falls #1
I really enjoyed this story. The author managed to hook me in the 1st chapter. Nocturne Falls and it's characters are very endearing. I can hardly wait for the rest of the series to become available on audio-book.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Mayd Marian
- 11-11-15
One of those 'Can't Stop Reading This' books.
What did you love best about The Vampire's Mail Order Bride?
I was hooked right from the start. I love the way Kristen Painter writes. The characters quickly became special people and friends to me. It was like being in the story to me.
What did you like best about this story?
OMG! I love the whole book. I finally had to stop it around midnight to get some sleep but sure didn't want to. It has romance, suspense, other relationships with characters, and background to explain it all. The intimacy was alluded to not described in detail which is a nice change from so many books spending lots of time on those scenes. I like those books also but this way of writing let me concentrate on the wonderful personalities of the characters and their relationship. I love the whole story of the city, it's streets, the business names, events etc. Extremely creative and lots of fun.
Have you listened to any of B.J. Harrison’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
Never experienced this narrator before but he is absolutely FABULOUS! He got every character just right and with individual voices. He even got the female voices spot-on. His accents were just right and fit the characters perfectly. I definitely look forward to reading more from Kirsten Painter and B.J. Harrison either together in one book/story or separate.
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
There were so many 'moments'. Some made me anxious and worried, some made me smile or laugh and some made tears roll down my cheeks.
Any additional comments?
I am in love with Delaney, Hugo, and all of Nocturne Falls, residents. I look forward to the next books in the series to get to know some of the others and their lives events. I hope they will all get recorded by the same narrator. So happy I got this book and I know I will be reading it again and again.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Ann
- 04-26-16
Funny Vampire Story!
Who knew that you could write a funny vampire story? Good fun bpok! Well here is one. Good story line, good narrator and just fun!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 09-29-16
I wish I lived there!!
I wish this town really existed!! And It's a very lovely book!
I love the modernness and witty commentary from the characters!♥️
I can not wait to listen to the rest of the book collection!! 🙌🏼
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- Timerra
- 02-16-17
Fun!
Where does The Vampire's Mail Order Bride rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
This book rates right at the top.
Have you listened to any of B.J. Harrison’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
I have and it's fun and lively. I love it!
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
What would it be like to meet a dreamy vampire?
Any additional comments?
I just love these books and plan to read them all!
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- Bailey
- 06-28-16
Much better than I thought it would be
I was sceptical at first about the narrator but he was great. He did the voices very well and was great at adding the humor to the descriptions. I hope he is the narrator for the rest of this series
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- Kristi
- 02-24-18
As fluffy and sweet as pink cotton candy
Let me get a few things straight right off the back. This book is sweet, not sexy. It is NOT erotica if that is what you are looking for. The dirty scenes are cut off and left to the imagination. The storyline is as believable as any romantic comedy out there which means, not at all. With all of that said, it is sweet and a fun, easy listen. If you're looking for something that is just going to be a light listen, you don't need a lot of drama or excitement, you just want to ooh and ahh as two people fall in love...this is your story.
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Delaney is an awesome heroine. She is a strong woman with a mind of her own but she's also intelligent, sweet, and doesn't make bad decisions just for the sake of conflict in the story (a pet peeve of mine). Hugh (funny choice in name) is a vampire with a British accent and all of the good nature you want in a romcom leading man. Hugh Grant much? Well, I love Hugh Grant and therefore this vampire as well.
I enjoyed the story quite a bit and was super happy to find it on the romance package. Picking up book 2, now.
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- Kindle Customer
- 01-04-16
Delaney and Hugh a good book 1 in the series
I enjoyed Kristen Painter's first book in the Nocturn Falls series. Delaney James has decided to switch identities with another lady to escape her mob boss. Luckily for her she lands in Nocturn falls and meets Hugh Ellingham, one of the city's founders and major supporter of several businesses. Delaney's love of life and chocolate revitalizes the hundreds year old Hugh. With the help of the characters, the reader begins to learn about Nocturn Falls and its inhabitants. I have also read book two and purchased book three. Fun to read and I am enjoying all the different characters.
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