You Are Not a Sh*tty Parent
How to Practice Self-Compassion and Give Yourself a Break
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Narrated by:
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Rosemary Benson
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By:
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Carla Naumburg
About this listen
Of course you think you’re doing a sh*tty job. Every parent does. It’s pretty much a byproduct of our society, with its incessant demands coupled with the in-your-face competitiveness parents see on social media. Unfortunately, the pandemic only made things worse, as parents juggled the stresses of helping their kids navigate online schooling while they also had to work from home. All of which makes Carla Naumburg’s new book utterly necessary. Author of How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids, with 149,000 copies in print, Naumburg delivers her message right up front—You Are Not a Sh*tty Parent—that all parents need to hear and believe in. And she does it with her singular understanding, relatably funny voice, and keen insights.
You don’t react calmly to every situation? That doesn’t make you a sh*tty parent. You’d rather hide in the back of the closet than play dolls with your child (because you hate dolls)—nope, doesn’t mean you’re a sh*tty parent. The fact is, great parenting is not the same thing as perfect parenting. Great parenting starts with true self-compassion, the kind that means you don’t judge yourself. Harnessing this self-compassion is the key to giving yourself a break and embracing your best qualities as a parent. There are four evidence-based elements of self-compassion—noticing, connection, curiosity, and compassion of course—and Naumburg gives tangible steps for how to use each to help parents reduce their anxiety, trust their instincts, move past the guilt and become a calmer, more confident parent. Which, in the end, benefits your child as much as you.
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Critic reviews
"It’s easy to see why Naumburg’s side-splittingly funny and relatable work resonates so strongly during a challenging time. Essential reading."—Library Journal, starred review
"Kicking your own ass doesn't help you, and it definitely doesn't help your kids. Here's how to stop."—Dan Harris, author of the New York Times bestseller 10% Happier
"Carla Naumburg gets it. She understands how impossible it is to parent these days, and how we beat ourselves up for everything that goes wrong. Not only does Carla have your back, she speaks with a voice that is both reassuring and laugh-out-loud funny, offering ways to find more joy and sanity. If you are exhausted, stressed, depressed and at the end of your rope, grab this book. It is a life saver."—Dr. Susan Pollak, co-founder, Center for Mindfulness and Compassion, Cambridge Health Alliance, Harvard Medical School. Author, Self Compassion for Parents: Nurture Your Child by Caring for Yourself
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Our children can be our greatest teachers. Parenting expert Susan Stiffelman writes that the very behaviors that push our buttons - refusing to cooperate or ignoring our requests - can help us build awareness and shed old patterns, allowing us to raise our children with greater ease and enjoyment.
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fantastic
- By Sarah Prentice on 06-26-16
By: Susan Stiffelman
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Parenting Without Power Struggles
- Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids While Staying Cool, Calm, and Connected
- By: Susan Stiffelman
- Narrated by: Susan Stiffelman
- Length: 8 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
While most parenting programs are designed to coerce kids to change, Parenting Without Power Struggles does something innovative, showing you how to help your children awaken their natural instincts to cooperate, rather than employing threats or bribes, which inevitably fuels their resistance. By staying calm and being the confident "captain of the ship" your child needs, you will learn how to parent from a place of strong, durable connection, and you'll be better able to help your kids navigate the challenging moments of growing up.
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Highly recommended.
- By Nothing really matters on 10-13-13
By: Susan Stiffelman
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Now Say This
- The Right Words to Solve Every Parenting Dilemma
- By: Heather Turgeon MFT, Julie Wright MFT
- Narrated by: Heather Turgeon MFT, Julie Wright MFT
- Length: 7 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Now Say This guides parents through a highly practical three-step approach to effectively communicating with children called ALP. It also discusses the power of words in all of our daily conversations. Each chapter addresses a different aspect of parenting and includes actual scripts and precise language for parents to use to set limits with empathy and to use conversations as opportunities for learning. Language is powerful, and the exact words, tone, and nonverbal communication parents use when trying to move through a sticky moment with their child means everything.
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Lots of useful examples
- By Christiane on 04-22-19
By: Heather Turgeon MFT, and others
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Adult Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers
- Quiet the Critical Voice in Your Head, Heal Self-Doubt, and Live the Life You Deserve
- By: Stephanie M. Kriesberg PsyD, Wendy T. Behary LCSW - foreword
- Narrated by: Linda Jones
- Length: 5 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
If you were raised by a narcissistic mother and are struggling with the lingering effects of a toxic upbringing, this is the road map you need to heal the past and thrive in the present and future.
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I really needed this!
- By Rachael E on 01-28-23
By: Stephanie M. Kriesberg PsyD, and others
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Happier Now
- By: Nataly Kogan
- Narrated by: Nataly Kogan
- Length: 6 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
What if you could be happier, right now, without radically changing your life? As nationally recognized happiness expert Nataly Kogan teaches, happiness is not a nice feeling or a frivolous extra. It’s a critical, non-negotiable ingredient for living a fulfilling, meaningful, and healthy life - and it's a skill that we can all learn and improve through practice. In Happier Now, Nataly shares an illuminating, inspiring, and science-based guide to help you build your happier skills and live with more joy, starting now.
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This book will turn your life around ... TODAY!
- By Joe Barnhill on 06-04-18
By: Nataly Kogan
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Parenting ADHD Now!
- Easy Intervention Strategies to Empower Kids with ADHD
- By: Elaine Taylor-Klaus, Diane Dempster
- Narrated by: Eliza Foss
- Length: 5 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In Parenting ADHD Now!, Diane and Elaine combine their practical know-how and professional expertise to offer immediate, actionable strategies you can use to guide and support your ADHD child compassionately and effectively.
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wonderful strategies
- By Niki Stein on 04-19-19
By: Elaine Taylor-Klaus, and others
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Crazy-Stressed
- Saving Today's Overwhelmed Teens with Love, Laughter, and the Science of Resilience
- By: Dr. Michael J. Bradley
- Narrated by: Chris Kayser
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Peel back the cheerful façade that parents present, and you'll find that many are worried about their teens. Mood swings, impulsiveness, poor judgment, and other problems peak in these years. Add stressors such as screen addiction, cyberbullying, increasing academic demands, and time-consuming athletic commitments...and it's no surprise that today's teenagers rank as the most anxious in 50 years.
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The title got me hooked
- By Robin Pinto on 03-31-18
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Finding Your Own North Star
- Claiming the Life You Were Meant to Live
- By: Martha Beck
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 14 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
As the creator of Life Designs, Inc., Martha Beck has helped hundreds of clients find their own North Stars and figure out how to fulfill their potential and create joyful lives through her lectures, seminars, and one-on-one counseling. In this book she shares her step-by-step program that will guide you to fulfill your own potential.
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Narration not for me
- By MARYANN ORDONEZ on 10-02-17
By: Martha Beck
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The Courage Habit
- How to Accept Your Fears, Release the Past, and Live Your Courageous Life
- By: Kate Swoboda, Bari Tessler MA
- Narrated by: Kate Marcin
- Length: 5 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In The Courage Habit, certified life coach Kate Swoboda offers freedom from the outdated belief that one must be fearless in order to live courageously. Instead, she defines courage as a willingness to act on what we want in spite of our fears and offers an evidence-based program to help readers conquer their inner critic, overcome worries, increase resilience, work toward their highest aspirations, and make courage a habit every day.
By: Kate Swoboda, and others
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Oh Crap! Potty Training
- Everything Modern Parents Need to Know to Do It Once and Do It Right
- By: Jamie Glowacki
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Let Jamie Glowacki show you how potty training is done. Her six-step, proven process to get your toddler out of diapers and onto the toilet has already worked for 10s of thousands of kids and their parents.
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Very snarky and anti-parent
- By Katrina on 01-25-16
By: Jamie Glowacki
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The Good Fight
- Wanting to Leave, Choosing to Stay, and the Powerful Practice for Loving Faithfully
- By: Jana Kramer, Michael Caussin
- Narrated by: Jana Kramer, Michael Caussin
- Length: 5 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Hosts of the award-winning Whine Down podcast, Jana Kramer and Michael Caussin explore the raw and real moments of their marriage - what it means to love, to fight, and to sincerely forgive - with spiritual guidance and practical advice for anyone seeking stronger, more fulfilling love.
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Could’ve been a short article and not a book
- By J Klay on 11-01-20
By: Jana Kramer, and others
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Joint Custody with a Jerk
- Raising a Child with an Uncooperative Ex
- By: Judy Corcoran, Julie A. Ross, MA
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It's a fact that parenting is hard enough in a family where two parents love and respect each other. After divorce, when the respect has diminished and the love has often turned to intense dislike, co-parenting can be nearly impossible, driving one or both parents to the brink of insanity. Joint Custody with a Jerk offers many proven communication techniques that help you deal with your difficult ex-husband or ex-wife.
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Victim blaming
- By Michelle Johann on 08-31-18
By: Judy Corcoran, and others
-
Becoming Super Woman
- A Simple 12-Step Plan to Go from Burnout to Balance
- By: Nicole Lapin
- Narrated by: Nicole Lapin
- Length: 8 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It's time to stop putting yourself at the bottom of every to-do list and start taking care of yourself first. It's time to leave Superwoman in the movies, where she belongs, and say hello to being a super woman - the best, most productive version of the hero you already are.
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Easy Listen and advice that is actually useful
- By Sean E. Huie on 10-21-19
By: Nicole Lapin
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The Science of Stuck
- Breaking Through Inertia to Find Your Path Forward
- By: Britt Frank LSCSW
- Narrated by: Sasha Heinz, Britt Frank LSCSW
- Length: 7 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
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Performance
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Story
We all experience stuckness in our lives. We feel stuck in our relationships, career paths, body struggles, addiction issues, and more. Many of us know what we need to do to move forward—but find ourselves unable to take the leap to make it happen. And then we blame and shame ourselves, and stay in a loop of self-doubt that goes nowhere. The good news is you’re not lazy, crazy, or unmotivated. In this empowering and action-oriented guide, you’ll discover why we can’t think our way forward—and how to break through what’s holding us back.
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Mental health is a physical process
- By Meagen G. on 04-18-22
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Gratitude and Trust
- Six Affirmations That Will Change Your Life
- By: Paul Williams, Tracey Jackson
- Narrated by: Paul Williams, Tracey Jackson
- Length: 6 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Paul Williams is an alcoholic. Tracey Jackson is not. But together, these two close friends have written Gratitude and Trust, a book designed to apply the principles of the recovery movement to the countless people who are not addicts but nevertheless need effective help with their difficulties and pain. Williams, the award-winning songwriter, actor, and performer, has embraced a traditional alcoholism recovery plan for more than two decades of sobriety.
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Just what I needed!
- By Cheryl on 02-18-15
By: Paul Williams, and others
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Would not recommend this book to anyone
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Angry Parent Angry Child
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Great advice
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Stop Yelling and Love Me More, Please Mom.
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We can not raise a happy child if we are constantly screaming threats at them. No parent sets out to hurt their child, but this type of parenting does just that. To raise a happy child that wants to behave, you need to retrain yourself first. You need to change the way you think and react to their behavior. You need to understand your triggers and heal yourself. Only then you can begin to heal your relationship with your children.
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Nice information
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How to Talk When Kids Won't Listen
- Whining, Fighting, Meltdowns, Defiance, and Other Challenges of Childhood
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Faber and King have tailored How to Talk’s tried-and-trusted communication strategies to some of the most challenging childhood moments. From tantrums to technology to talking to kids about tough topics, How to Talk When Kids Won’t Listen offers concrete strategies for these and many more difficult situations.
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Hopeful and grateful Dad-to-be
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Highlighting the fascinating link between a child’s neurological development and the way a parent reacts to misbehavior, No-Drama Discipline provides an effective, compassionate road map for dealing with tantrums, tensions, and tears - without causing a scene. Defining the true meaning of the “d” word (to instruct, not to shout or reprimand), the authors explain how to reach your child, redirect emotions, and turn a meltdown into an opportunity for growth.
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I Can See Light At The End Of My Tunnel
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Good content written poorly
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Would not recommend this book to anyone
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We can not raise a happy child if we are constantly screaming threats at them. No parent sets out to hurt their child, but this type of parenting does just that. To raise a happy child that wants to behave, you need to retrain yourself first. You need to change the way you think and react to their behavior. You need to understand your triggers and heal yourself. Only then you can begin to heal your relationship with your children.
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Nice information
- By Yesika on 09-27-19
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With this book, you’ll find powerful mindfulness skills for calming your own stress response when difficult emotions arise. You’ll also discover strategies for cultivating respectful communication, effective conflict resolution, and reflective listening. In the process, you’ll learn to examine your own unhelpful patterns and ingrained reactions that reflect the generational habits shaped by your parents, so you can break the cycle and respond to your children in more skillful ways.
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Great Book About Parenting and Teaching Kindness!
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Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child
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Based on 20 years of research at the University of Washington studying parent-child interactions, award-winning research psychologist John Gottman and his team have developed Emotion Coaching - a technique parents can use to teach their children self-awareness and self-control and to foster good emotional development. This proven technique has demonstrated a positive effect on children's physical health, academic achievement, and emotional well-being.
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My parenting philosophy, in writing!
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The Explosive Child
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Dr. Ross Greene, a distinguished clinician and pioneer in the treatment of kids with social, emotional, and behavioral challenges, has worked with thousands of explosive children, and he has good news: these kids aren't attentionseeking, manipulative, or unmotivated, and their parents aren't passive, permissive disciplinarians. Rather, explosive kids are lacking some crucial skills in the domains of flexibility/adaptability, frustration tolerance, and problem solving, and they require a different approach.
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I started to cry....and this Dad doesn't do that
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How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk
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Best. Parenting. Book. Ever.
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In You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom, award-winning journalist and Instagram star Leslie Anne Bruce acknowledges that, yes, motherhood is a total mind f*ck—but then she offers the self-empowerment lessons new mothers need to get through the psychic upheaval and emerge stronger than ever. After childbirth, a woman's body, her relationships, and her very sense of self are tested like never before. Bruce encourages listeners to look past the sugarcoated truisms about the miracles of child-rearing in order to embrace the real joys of motherhood, spit-up stains and all.
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Overwhelmed mom caused by absentee husband
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Anger Management for Explosive Parents
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Do you easily get angry with your child? Do little things annoy you easily? Have you experienced an outburst in public? Are you tired of yelling inside the house to have your children obey? Discover the yell-free and stress-free approach to parenting!
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A much needed perspective in parenting
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The Whole-Brain Child
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In this pioneering, practical book, Daniel J. Siegel, neuropsychiatrist and author of the bestselling Mindsight, and parenting expert Tina Payne Bryson offer a revolutionary approach to child rearing with twelve key strategies that foster healthy brain development, leading to calmer, happier children. The authors explain—and make accessible—the new science of how a child’s brain is wired and how it matures.
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Several comments on the brain were incorrect.
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By: Daniel J. Siegel M.D., and others
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The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read
- (And Your Children Will Be Glad That You Did)
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In this instant Sunday Times bestseller, leading psychotherapist Philippa Perry reveals the vital do's and don'ts of relationships. This is a book for us all. Whether you are interested in understanding how your upbringing has shaped you, looking to handle your child's feelings or wishing to support your partner, you will find indispensable information and realistic tips here. Philippa Perry's sane, sage and judgement-free advice is an essential resource on how to have the best possible relationships with the people who matter to you most.
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Excellent advice overall
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By: Philippa Perry
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What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew
- Working Together to Empower Kids for Success in School and Life
- By: Dr. Sharon Saline, Dr. Laura Markham
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Veteran psychologist Sharon Saline shares the words and inner struggles of children and teens living with ADHD - and a blueprint for achieving lasting success by working together. Based on more than 25 years of experience counseling young people and their families, Dr. Saline’s advice and real-world examples reveal how parents can shift the dynamic and truly help kids succeed.
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Thoughtful and Practical
- By Sun-Sensitive on 04-28-19
By: Dr. Sharon Saline, and others
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The Power of Showing Up
- How Parental Presence Shapes Who Our Kids Become and How Their Brains Get Wired
- By: Daniel J. Siegel MD, Tina Payne Bryson PhD
- Narrated by: Daniel J. Siegel MD, Tina Payne Bryson PhD
- Length: 7 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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One of the very best scientific predictors for how any child turns out - in terms of happiness, academic success, leadership skills, and meaningful relationships - is whether at least one adult in their life has consistently shown up for them. In an age of scheduling demands and digital distractions, showing up for your child might sound like a tall order. But as best-selling authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson reassuringly explain, it doesn’t take a lot of time, energy, or money. Instead, showing up means offering a quality of presence.
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Great Educators
- By Bored on 02-26-21
By: Daniel J. Siegel MD, and others
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How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen
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- By: Joanna Faber, Julie King
- Narrated by: Heather Alicia Simms, Michele Pawk, Candace Thaxton, and others
- Length: 10 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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What do you do with a little kid who...won't brush her teeth...screams in his car seat...pinches the baby...refuses to eat vegetables...runs rampant in the supermarket? Organized according to common challenges and conflicts, this book is an essential emergency first-aid manual of communication strategies, including a chapter that addresses the special needs of children with sensory processing and autism spectrum disorders.
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The message is great but the narration and writing style cringey
- By Elliott Family on 07-23-19
By: Joanna Faber, and others
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The Relationship Cure
- A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships
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A five-step guide for building better connections with family, friends, and lovers, The Relationship Cure offers a simple but profound program that will fundamentally transform the quality of all the relationships in your life.
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Buy in Print. Audiobook good only as refresher.
- By Mark Taylor on 06-04-12
By: John Gottman PhD, and others
What listeners say about You Are Not a Sh*tty Parent
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- 11-28-23
Useless platitudes
I tried so hard to give this book a chance to get to the point. I was hoping she would break out data and studies that “good enough” parenting produced happy healthy kids, or literally anything evidence based. This was not that. This entire book could have been summarized by the motivational poster “hang in there.” I made it half way through, cringing the entire time, before giving up on this author. The narrator is great though! It’s just the content that’s awful.
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