Showing results by author "Simon Haynes" in All Categories

How far would you run to escape your past? Hal and Clunk fly halfway across the galaxy, putting their earlier mishaps, disasters and angry customers behind them. It's a chance to start anew. To rebuild their reputation. To actually complete a cargo job without destroying the lot. Unfortunately, they chose the wrong planet ... The Hal Spacejock series features humorous science fiction, adventure and action. They're clean books with very occasional swearing (mild).

Clunk, a clapped-out robot, is convinced he's about to be junked. Instead, his penny-pinching boss is sending him off to be refurbished. Being old and wise, Clunk knows there's a catch, but at first it doesn't seem too bad. He just has to help a freelancer pick up some cargo. Unfortunately, Hal Spacejock - the freelancer - is obstinate, over-confident, and woefully under-skilled, and he's never going to let a lowly robot fly his precious ship. Is there any chance this pair of misfits can lift off, collect the cargo and deliver it in one piece?

After messing up a live fire exercise, Sam Willet is hauled before the squadron leader for punishment. Her career as a fighter pilot appears to be over before it really began. Then, without warning, the enemy launches a major attack. Against this overwhelming force, every pilot is needed... Sam included. Now is her chance to redeem herself. Now is her chance to fight back. But the enemy's ambitions go far beyond the destruction of a second-string training base. If their bold plan succeeds, it could change the entire course of the war.

How far would you go to make your dreams come true? On Hal Spacejock's home planet, efficient and highly intelligent robots have taken most of the jobs. Hal's one of the lucky ones, because he works as a cargo loader at a third-rate spaceport. Lucky perhaps, but not satisfied. Because instead of loading freighters, Hal wants to fly them, exploring the galaxy in his very own ship. But how can he possibly save for a spaceship? Hal can barely make rent, and he's hanging onto his job by his fingernails. It all seems like an impossible dream, until Hal intervenes in a one-sided fight in the ...

The Spacers' Guild needs a new president, and Hal Spacejock is determined to cast his vote... even though he's not a member. Meanwhile, Hal's latest cargo job belongs to someone else, his shiny new ship is losing money hand over fist, and doing a good favour could turn out to be the biggest mistake of his life. Join Hal and Clunk in their tenth adventure, where the only good boots are... Cold Boots!

Hal and Clunk answer a distress call, only to discover a fellow pilot stranded deep inside an asteroid field. Clunk is busy at the controls, dodging incoming rocks, so Hal dons a spacesuit, takes the jetbike and sets off on a heroic rescue mission. If he'd only known the trouble he was getting himself into, he wouldn't have bothered...

What happens when you're worth more dead than alive? A decorated fighter pilot is lost in combat, and his death is used to inspire waves of fresh recruits. Recruits desperately needed to fight in the long-running war. Sam Willet is one such recruit, but she's different. Different because the missing hero is her brother, and Sam has questions. Questions nobody wants asked. Questions that will probably get her killed. Raiders is a complete, standalone novel in the Secret War series. Simon Haynes has been writing fiction for over twenty years. Raiders is his twenty-third novel.

All three books in the first Dragon and Chips trilogy in a single omnibus edition. Tasty, fire-breathing dragons. Angry sea serpents. Sea battles, land battles, assassins, and more. Get it now!

Hal Spacejock’s cargo business is going so well he’s considering getting into passengers...especially the beautiful and mysterious Sonya Polarov. Clunk's certain she's up to something, but as usual Hal won't listen to a word he says.... Meanwhile, Rex Curtis runs the galaxy’s biggest freight company, and he’s sick of independent pilots stealing his cargo jobs. He’s determined to make a statement by destroying the biggest nuisance of them all: Hal Spacejock.

I'm Simon Haynes, and I've been writing and publishing novels and short fiction for almost 20 years. This guide contains everything I've learned about writing a novel, both as an indie and as a trade-published author. Maybe you want to write a novel which has been on your mind for years. You don't care how long it takes, you just want to see it through to the end. Or maybe you see yourself as a career novelist - there's a real challenge - and you want to write books quickly and efficiently. I've done both, and I cover both approaches in How to Write a Novel.

Clunk, a clapped-out robot, is convinced he's about to be junked. Instead, his penny-pinching boss is sending him off to be refurbished. Being old and wise, Clunk knows there's a catch, but at first it doesn't seem too bad. He just has to help a freelancer pick up some cargo. Unfortunately, Hal Spacejock - the freelancer - is obstinate, over-confident, and woefully under-skilled, and he's never going to let a lowly robot fly his precious ship.

Clunk's lost his memories. He doesn't know who he is or where he came from. And there's nowhere to get a recharge. But fear not, because Clunk is resourceful and intelligent. He won't let marauding dragons, a bloodthirsty queen, and a vengeful champion get in his way. Not even the whopping great cast of minor characters all vying to become major players. But how's Clunk going to escape this medieval madness? How's Clunk going to get home?

Planet Dismolle is supposed to be a peaceful haven. So what's with all the gunfire? A criminal gang has moved into Chirless, Dismolle's second major city. Elderly residents are fed up with the loud music, noisy cars and late night parties, not to mention hold-ups, muggings and the occasional gunfight. Chirless has no Peace Force, so Harriet Walsh has to support them as best she can. That puts her up against a gang of hardened criminals with only her training pistol and a few old allies to lend a hand. And these allies aren't just old, they're positively ancient! Besieged by ruthless, well-...

First a dead body shows up on Harriet's favourite beach. Then she discovers the whole place is going to be bulldozed for an apartment complex. She's convinced the two are connected, but she'll have to untangle a web of lies and corruption to reach the truth. Meanwhile, someone has decided that the best way to avoid discovery is to silence Harriet... for good!

Space Station Oberon is expecting a Very Important Person, and Hal Junior has been given a choice: he must look after the VIP's snotty little kid, or miss out on a camping trip to planet Gyris. Bear in mind Hal Junior has spent his entire life aboard a space station, and he'll do anything to go camping. Well, almost anything. No homework, no chores ... and absolutely no babysitting! It turns out the kid is the least of Hal's problems, because together they uncover a terrible secret which could mean the end of the space station!

Space Station Oberon is on high alert, because a comet is about to whizz past. All the scientists are preparing for the exciting event, and all the kids are planning on watching. All the kids except Hal Junior, who's been given detention. Unfortunately the comet passes a whole lot closer than expected. Fortunately nobody is hurt, but the kids are trapped in one half, the adults in the other. Never mind. They have air and supplies, and they can all sit tight and wait for rescue. Or can they? The scientists discover Space Station Oberon is now falling towards Gyris, faster and faster, and ...

This is your pilot speaking. We have a problem in the engine bay. It's nothing to worry about, but please make your way to the escape pods. Hal Junior and Stephen 'Stinky' Binn live aboard a high-tech space station, far from the nearest planet. The rules are strict, and their lives are carefully regulated. That's why they're so excited about the camping trip to Planet Gyris ... imagine a whole week of fishing, swimming, sleeping in tents and running wild! Unfortunately, the boys crash land in the middle of a forest, and there's little chance of rescue. Is this the end of the camping trip .....

It's her first day as a rookie... but will it be her last? The Peace Force is an intergalactic crime-fighting organisation with a fearsome reputation, boundless resources, and legions of well-trained officers. Harriet Walsh, 21, doesn't care about any of that. To her, it looks like a steady job with real wages, and the invitation to join could not have come at a better time. But why is the invite printed on the back of an old junk food flyer? And how come she's never seen a Peace Force officer? With the crumpled invite in hand, Harriet heads for the local branch... and discovers there's a ...

Hal Spacejock lands on planet Alteia, where he's so distracted by his own problems that he forgets to collect Clunk from the luggage carousel. Not to worry, because a couple of old friends free Clunk from the spaceport ... only to reveal a great big ulterior motive: they want him to join their gang... er, group. Meanwhile, Hal's remembered his trusty co-pilot at last ... but only because everyone's trying to kill him, and Clunk is big and metal and bulletproof-ish.

Earth’s first colony ship heads for the stars ... and the crew discovers nothing is as it seems. A fearsome dragon terrorises a lonely village ... and three oddball heroes do their best to help out. A farm boy magicks his very own talking book ... and uses it to get laid. Collect One Two contains a dozen entertaining stories by Simon Haynes. These wide-ranging tales leap from mythical lands to the depths of space, from the Updowns of Titan to an inventor’s garden shed. One thing’s for sure ... boredom is not on the menu! Sleight of Hand The Desolator Updown A Piece of the Action Catch...