BoyMom
Reimagining Boyhood in the Age of Impossible Masculinity
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Narrated by:
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Ruth Whippman
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By:
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Ruth Whippman
About this listen
Combining painfully honest memoir, cultural analysis, and reporting, BoyMom is a humorous and heartbreaking deep dive into the complexities of raising boys in our fraught political moment.
“Rapist, school-shooter, incel, man-child, interrupter, mansplainer, boob-starer, birthday forgetter, frat boy, dude-bro, homophobe, self-important stoner, emotional-labor abstainer, non-wiper of kitchen counters. Trying to raise good sons suddenly felt like a hopeless task.”
As the culture wars rage, and masculinity has been politicized from all sides, feminist writer and mother of three boys Ruth Whippman finds herself conflicted and scared. While the right pushes a dangerous vision of fantasy manhood, her feminist peers often dismiss boys as little more than entitled predators-in-waiting. Meanwhile, her home life feels like a daily confrontation with the triumph of nature over nurture.
With young men in the grip of a loneliness epidemic and dying by suicide at a rate of nearly four times their female peers, Whippman asks: How do we raise our sons to have a healthy sense of self without turning them into privileged assholes? How can we find a feminism that holds boys to a higher standard but still treats them with empathy? And what do we do when our boys won’t cooperate with our plans?
Whippman digs into the impossibly contradictory pressures boys now face; and the harmful blind spots of male socialization that are leaving boys isolated, emotionally repressed, and adrift. Feminist gonzo-style, she spends months interviewing incels, reports on a conference for boys accused of sexual assault; crashes at a residential therapy center for young men in Utah, talks to a wide range of psychologists and other experts, and gets boys of all backgrounds to open up about sex, consent, porn, body image, mental health, cancel culture, screens, friendship, and loneliness. Along the way, she finds her simple certainties about male privilege seriously challenged.
With wit, honesty, and a refusal to settle for easy answers, BoyMom charts a new path to give boys a healthier, more expansive, and fulfilling story about their own lives.
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Critic reviews
“Provocative and probing . . . Ruth Whippman investigates the changing orthodoxies of American manhood. She discovers loneliness and failed good intentions but also a longing for connection and moments of grace. Whippman shows us that we ought to think harder about who we want our boys to become.”—Pamela Druckerman, author of Bringing Up Bébé
“Weaving her moving journey as a mother to three sons through a remarkably lucid review of child development and masculinity literatures, Whippman offers a powerful critique of our contemporary model for raising boys.”—Michael Reichert, author of How to Raise a Boy
“This book challenged and educated me, gave me hope while refusing easy answers. . . . A necessary addition to the canon of motherhood books.”—Amanda Montei, author of Touched Out
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- Length: 7 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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By cutting out the noise and providing a clear and proven plan, this road map helps even brand-new entrepreneurs make decisions quickly, get their product up for sale, and launch it to a crowd that is ready and waiting to buy. This one-year plan will guide you through the three stages to your first $1 million: the Grind (months 0-4), the Growth (months 5-8), and the Gold (months 9-12). If your goal is to be a full-time entrepreneur, get ready for one chaotic, stressful, and rewarding year. If you have the guts to complete it, you will be the proud owner of a million-dollar business.
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Good, but a Little Misleading
- By Chris Love on 11-28-20
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The 6 Habits of Growth
- By: Brendon Burchard
- Narrated by: Brendon Burchard
- Length: 5 hrs and 4 mins
- Original Recording
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The world’s leading high-performance coach and multiple New York Times best-selling author Brendon Burchard delivers the six habits of personal growth that will help you create the life of your dreams. Forged from Brendon Burchard’s personal experiences, data from his GrowthDay app, and his many years as a high-performance coach, The 6 Habits of Growth presents the tools you need to construct the life of your dreams.
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Don’t bother
- By B. Sharpe on 10-30-22
By: Brendon Burchard
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The Daily Stoic
- 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living
- By: Ryan Holiday, Stephen Hanselman
- Narrated by: Brian Holsopple
- Length: 10 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Why have history's greatest minds - from George Washington to Frederick the Great to Ralph Waldo Emerson along with today's top performers, from Super Bowl-winning football coaches to CEOs and celebrities - embraced the wisdom of the ancient Stoics? Because they realize that the most valuable wisdom is timeless and that philosophy is for living a better life, not a classroom exercise. The Daily Stoic offers a daily devotional of Stoic insights and exercises, featuring all-new translations.
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Not well made as audio
- By Andreas on 12-27-16
By: Ryan Holiday, and others
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21 Days to Believe in Yourself
- By: Michelle Poler
- Narrated by: Michelle Poler
- Length: 1 hr and 31 mins
- Original Recording
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21 Days to Believe In Yourself creates a space for people to take a look inside and, little by little, dare to bring what they find to the surface. By asking the right questions, the audience will get in touch with their most authentic selves and from a place of self-acceptance, fully own who they really are.
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Absolutely 💯 loved it!
- By Royal on 12-20-24
By: Michelle Poler
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Take Control of Your Life
- How to Silence Fear and Win the Mental Game
- By: Mel Robbins
- Narrated by: Mel Robbins
- Length: 10 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Mel Robbins is back! The international bestselling phenomenon and creator of The Five Second Rule and Kick Ass with Mel Robbins returns to help you tackle the single biggest obstacle you face: fear. This life-changing Audible Original features a powerful mix of one-on-one life-coaching sessions and a personal narrative with vital take-aways that you can start using immediately.
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Stop living in fear
- By Nike7 on 02-08-19
By: Mel Robbins
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Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
- A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed
- By: Lori Gottlieb
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley
- Length: 14 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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One day, Lori Gottlieb is a therapist who helps patients in her Los Angeles practice. The next, a crisis causes her world to come crashing down. Enter Wendell, the quirky but seasoned therapist in whose office she suddenly lands. With his balding head, cardigan, and khakis, he seems to have come straight from Therapist Central Casting. Yet he will turn out to be anything but.
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It was like a hallmark movie being waterboarded into my ears for 15 hours
- By Amazon Customer on 10-01-19
By: Lori Gottlieb
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How to Train Your Mind
- Exploring the Productivity Benefits of Meditation
- By: Chris Bailey
- Narrated by: Chris Bailey
- Length: 3 hrs and 18 mins
- Original Recording
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Meditation makes you more productive because it lets you earn back time. For each minute you spend meditating, you'll earn around nine minutes back, as Chris Bailey - author of The Productivity Project and Hyperfocus - will show in this candid and counter-intuitive guide to the productivity benefits of meditation.
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Started Listening By Accident
- By T.D.Willis on 01-17-21
By: Chris Bailey
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Deep Sleep Hypnosis: Fall Asleep Instantly and Sleep Well
- By: Jasmine Harris
- Narrated by: Allison Mason
- Length: 2 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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A lack of quality sleep can hinder your alertness and quality of life while awake, as anyone with sleeping issues already knows. Suffering through sleepless nights does not have to be your reality. Instead you can fall asleep fast and get quality sleep tonight and every night. Hypnosis has been used for centuries to cure many ailments, including the inability to get better sleep. You can help yourself improve the quality of your life with hypnotherapy.
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put me right to sleep
- By Cassandra on 05-08-17
By: Jasmine Harris
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How to Say It: Words That Make a Difference
- By: Allison Friederichs Atkison, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Allison Friederichs Atkison
- Length: 4 hrs and 44 mins
- Original Recording
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Words. We use them all the time, every day, mostly without giving them much thought at all. We take for granted that they’re here at our disposal whenever we need them. But if you’ve ever wished you could communicate more effectively, words are the place to start. It’s incumbent upon you to choose the best words to accomplish your goals, because how you choose to communicate influences—well, everything! The power of communication shapes our professional goals, our relationships, and our lives—so the words we choose to use carry a great deal of power.
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Meh. Glad I didn't pay for it.
- By Paula on 07-23-22
By: Allison Friederichs Atkison, and others
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Natural Rapid Weight Loss, Lose Weight Faster with Hypnosis, Meditation, and Affirmations
- The Sleep Learning System
- By: Joel Thielke
- Narrated by: Joel Thielke
- Length: 2 hrs and 47 mins
- Original Recording
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Naturally lose weight fast and get the body you've been wanting. Stop old habits in their tracks, shed pounds now, and feel amazing. Rapid weight loss is yours today with this powerful guided meditation program from the Sleep Learning System and world-renowned hypnotherapist Joel Thielke.
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My new favorite hypnosis audio!
- By Penny on 04-03-16
By: Joel Thielke
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Models
- Attract Women Through Honesty
- By: Mark Manson
- Narrated by: Austin Rising
- Length: 7 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Models is the first book ever written on seduction as an emotional process rather than a logical one, a process of connecting with women rather than impressing them. It's the most mature and honest guide on how a man can attract women without faking behavior, without lying and without emulating others. A game-changer.
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The content is great but the reader is awful
- By Mark Speener on 06-24-14
By: Mark Manson
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Not Nice
- Stop People Pleasing, Staying Silent, & Feeling Guilty... And Start Speaking up, Saying No, Asking Boldly, and Unapologetically Being Yourself
- By: Dr. Aziz Gazipura PsyD
- Narrated by: Dr. Aziz Gazipura PsyD
- Length: 18 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Are you too nice? If you find it hard to be assertive, directly ask for what you want, or say "no" to others, then you just might be suffering from too much niceness. In this controversial book, world-renowned confidence expert, Dr. Aziz Gazipura, takes an incisive look at the concept of nice. Through his typical style, Dr. Aziz uses engaging stories, humor, and disarming vulnerability to cut through the nice conditioning and liberate the most bold, expressive, authentic version of you.
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Changed my life forever
- By Shannon Slater on 12-07-18
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I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
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Worthy
- How to Believe You Are Enough and Transform Your Life
- By: Jamie Kern Lima
- Narrated by: Jamie Kern Lima
- Length: 11 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Author Jamie Kern Lima's first, instant New York Times bestselling book Believe It, captured her journey of going from Denny's waitress to billion-dollar entrepreneur by learning to believe in herself. And now her second, much-anticipated, upcoming book Worthy, is the playbook for how YOU can believe in YOU! If you've ever struggled with self-doubt, felt like you don't have what it takes...or that who you truly are isn't enough, even if you're really good at hiding it from the world, WORTHY is for you.
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💫 We're so WORTHY! 🦋 Listen - Read - Share 🔆
- By Diana Yin on 02-22-24
By: Jamie Kern Lima
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Are you happy? Right now? Happy enough? As happy as everyone else? Could you be happier if you tried harder? After she packed up her British worldview (that most things were basically rubbish) and moved to America, journalist and documentary filmmaker Ruth Whippman found herself increasingly perplexed by the American obsession with one topic above all others: happiness. The subject came up everywhere: at the playground swings, at the meat counter in the supermarket, and even at the gynecologist.
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Makes a very intelligent and interesting case
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Update of wording in your book is required
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Listened so long to get out so... little
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What is the boy crisis? It's a crisis of education. For the first time in American history, our sons will have less education than their dads. It's a crisis of mental health. As boys become young men, their suicide rates go from equal to girls to six times that of young women. It's a crisis of sexuality. Sex is a minefield for our sons. They're bombarded with mixed messages, afraid of being either too sensitive or not sensitive enough.
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Good points ruined by social justice interlogs
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A book for the times!
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Please read with caution if you’re pregnant.
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Wonder
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August Pullman was born with a facial difference that, up until now, has prevented him from going to a mainstream school. Starting 5th grade at Beecher Prep, he wants nothing more than to be treated as an ordinary kid—but his new classmates can’t get past Auggie’s extraordinary face. Beginning from Auggie’s point of view and expanding to include his classmates, his sister, her boyfriend, and others, the perspectives converge to form a portrait of one community’s struggle with empathy, compassion, and acceptance.
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Must-read for kids!
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Couldn't be better
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When You Care
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Behind our current caregiving crisis, in which a broken system has left parents and caregivers exhausted, sits a fierce addiction to independence. But what would happen if we started to appreciate dependency, and the deep meaning of one person caring for another? If we start to care about care? With a curiosity and desire to understand more fully one of humanity’s most profound and essential relationships, journalist Elissa Strauss she interrogates our societal obsession with going it alone and poses a challenge to let ourselves be transformed by the act of caregiving.
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Mother and Son
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Love is important, but it is respect that is the key to your son's heart. The idea of moms respecting their sons may sound alien to some, but it seems to ignite curiosity across the board. It is easy to relate to the need for all of us to feel a mother's love, but is that the same thing as respect? Even for young boys, the effect of respect is nothing short of astounding when applied properly.
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Like finding pure gold!!!!!
- By Mary on 10-27-17
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Of Boys and Men
- Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do About It
- By: Richard V. Reeves
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The father of three sons, a journalist, and a Brookings Institution scholar, Richard V. Reeves has spent twenty-five years worrying about boys both at home and work. His new book, Of Boys and Men, tackles the complex and urgent crisis of boyhood and manhood. Reeves looks at the structural challenges that face boys and men and offers fresh and innovative solutions that turn the page on the corrosive narrative that plagues this issue. Of Boys and Men argues that helping the other half of society does not mean giving up on the ideal of gender equality.
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Regretful of My Knee-jerk Reaction To This Title 😔
- By Hazel Winters on 10-13-22
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How to Raise a Boy
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- Narrated by: Adam Grupper
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Michael C. Reichert draws on his 30 years of experience researching the process by which boys become men to provide a road map for parents and educators who hope to help the boys they love and care about grow into strong, emotionally intelligent, and compassionate men.
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Good overall information, but a but lacking how-to
- By Dima on 01-12-21
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Boys Should Be Boys
- By: Meg Meeker M.D.
- Narrated by: Pam Ward
- Length: 8 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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What are little boys made of? It used to be frogs, snails, and puppy dog tails, but today it is MTV, ADD, and STDs. So how do parents raise their sons to be respectful and responsible young men in a toxic culture that relentlessly undermines masculine virtues such as moral strength, self-restraint, and respect for women? By letting boys be boys.
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Not like it was in my days
- By Dave on 01-28-09
By: Meg Meeker M.D.
What listeners say about BoyMom
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- Tia Briggs-Sawyer
- 11-04-24
Great read!
I appreciate Whippman’s balanced perspective here. She touched on how patriarchal norms hurt boys and girls, women and men.
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- Rebekah
- 12-13-24
Completely Changed my Perspective of my Two Boys
Anyone that has a boy needs to read this book. It is insightful, enlightening, and honestly mind blowing. It brought up stereotypes that are so ingrained I had no idea that I subscribed to them. The research behind this book is incredible, all of the interviews, places she ventured to, and boys online she talks to is so interesting. I cannot recommend this book enough. I will be rereading this book every few years while I raise my boys to keep all of the information fresh. Oh and I loved that the author read it, she has a great accent and voice that is fun to listen to.
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- Alexandra
- 12-05-24
The Most Impactful Parenting Book I’ve Read
Do not miss this book. It is truly transformative, and will provide you with profound insight into how to be the best possible feminist mother to your sweet boy.
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- Client d'Amazon
- 08-24-24
Outstanding analysis
Anyone who is raising a boy or wants to ensure our nation’s boys thrive should read this book.
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- SDMama
- 09-17-24
Fantastic
This is a book that everyone should read, whether you’re a Boy Mom or not. Thank you to Ruth Whippman for starting this conversation!
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- Kakki
- 07-15-24
Amazing book - relevant for all
This is one of the best books I have read in a long time. I am a mother of two young boys so was drawn to this, but as I begin listening I really felt everyone should read this book. I have five brothers who have struggled in various ways, one of which died by suicide about 10 years ago. I deeply related to a lot of the things she describes, from folks being sympathetic that I have two boys, to the crucial human connection that boys often miss out on in this life. I felt her accounting was very honest, nuanced, and straightforward. Highly recommend!
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- Débora
- 09-18-24
Some good points that take too long to come up
I wanted to read this hopping that would provide insights based on something. although there are some valid points, the author takes too long describing her own experience, but also painting a general picture that just seems too exaggerated and with no support apart from hear say.
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- somethingusual
- 12-06-24
"consent is a murky concept"
I was looking for practical advice about raising emotionally intelligent boys and I got none of that from this book. The author goes into lengthy deliberations about whether "the men are ones who are now oppressed" as a result of feminists' work. She interviews incels and convicted rapists and somehow comes to a conclusion that consent is now a murky concept that became too hard for modern boys to grasp, among other ridiculous statements. I will be asking for a refund and I wish I could get my time back after listening to this.
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