BoyMom
Reimagining Boyhood in the Age of Impossible Masculinity
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Narrated by:
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Ruth Whippman
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By:
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Ruth Whippman
About this listen
Combining painfully honest memoir, cultural analysis, and reporting, BoyMom is a humorous and heartbreaking deep dive into the complexities of raising boys in our fraught political moment.
“Rapist, school-shooter, incel, man-child, interrupter, mansplainer, boob-starer, birthday forgetter, frat boy, dude-bro, homophobe, self-important stoner, emotional-labor abstainer, non-wiper of kitchen counters. Trying to raise good sons suddenly felt like a hopeless task.”
As the culture wars rage, and masculinity has been politicized from all sides, feminist writer and mother of three boys Ruth Whippman finds herself conflicted and scared. While the right pushes a dangerous vision of fantasy manhood, her feminist peers often dismiss boys as little more than entitled predators-in-waiting. Meanwhile, her home life feels like a daily confrontation with the triumph of nature over nurture.
With young men in the grip of a loneliness epidemic and dying by suicide at a rate of nearly four times their female peers, Whippman asks: How do we raise our sons to have a healthy sense of self without turning them into privileged assholes? How can we find a feminism that holds boys to a higher standard but still treats them with empathy? And what do we do when our boys won’t cooperate with our plans?
Whippman digs into the impossibly contradictory pressures boys now face; and the harmful blind spots of male socialization that are leaving boys isolated, emotionally repressed, and adrift. Feminist gonzo-style, she spends months interviewing incels, reports on a conference for boys accused of sexual assault; crashes at a residential therapy center for young men in Utah, talks to a wide range of psychologists and other experts, and gets boys of all backgrounds to open up about sex, consent, porn, body image, mental health, cancel culture, screens, friendship, and loneliness. Along the way, she finds her simple certainties about male privilege seriously challenged.
With wit, honesty, and a refusal to settle for easy answers, BoyMom charts a new path to give boys a healthier, more expansive, and fulfilling story about their own lives.
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Critic reviews
“Provocative and probing . . . Ruth Whippman investigates the changing orthodoxies of American manhood. She discovers loneliness and failed good intentions but also a longing for connection and moments of grace. Whippman shows us that we ought to think harder about who we want our boys to become.”—Pamela Druckerman, author of Bringing Up Bébé
“Weaving her moving journey as a mother to three sons through a remarkably lucid review of child development and masculinity literatures, Whippman offers a powerful critique of our contemporary model for raising boys.”—Michael Reichert, author of How to Raise a Boy
“This book challenged and educated me, gave me hope while refusing easy answers. . . . A necessary addition to the canon of motherhood books.”—Amanda Montei, author of Touched Out
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Self Help
- This Is Your Chance to Change Your Life
- By: Gabrielle Bernstein, Richard C. Schwartz - foreword
- Narrated by: Gabrielle Bernstein, Richard C. Schwartz - foreword
- Length: 6 hrs and 1 min
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Are you ready to unlock the greatest resource of your life? Gabby Bernstein has written the ultimate self-help guide, offering a revolutionary practice to radically shift your core beliefs and connect you to an infallible inner guidance system: the energy of Self within you. In this groundbreaking book, Gabby demystifies the power of Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy, taking its life-changing teachings out of the therapist’s office and into your everyday life.
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Self Serving
- By pricefreund on 01-14-25
By: Gabrielle Bernstein, and others
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Update of wording in your book is required
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The father of three sons, a journalist, and a Brookings Institution scholar, Richard V. Reeves has spent twenty-five years worrying about boys both at home and work. His new book, Of Boys and Men, tackles the complex and urgent crisis of boyhood and manhood. Reeves looks at the structural challenges that face boys and men and offers fresh and innovative solutions that turn the page on the corrosive narrative that plagues this issue. Of Boys and Men argues that helping the other half of society does not mean giving up on the ideal of gender equality.
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Like finding pure gold!!!!!
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The Kids Are All Right
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Gabrielle and Ben Blair have been raising kids for over two decades. Through the years, they’ve charted their own unconventional path: working from home before remote work was a thing; uprooting their kids four, five, six times–including a move to France where they enrolled in local schools without knowing the language. It’s been a unique parenting journey characterized by experimentation, trial and error, decisions prompted by financial or psychological necessity, varying levels of anxiety and tension, despair, and hope.
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Privileged
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Raising Good Humans
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With this book, you’ll find powerful mindfulness skills for calming your own stress response when difficult emotions arise. You’ll also discover strategies for cultivating respectful communication, effective conflict resolution, and reflective listening. In the process, you’ll learn to examine your own unhelpful patterns and ingrained reactions that reflect the generational habits shaped by your parents, so you can break the cycle and respond to your children in more skillful ways.
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Great Book About Parenting and Teaching Kindness!
- By Ma P on 09-11-20
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Raising Emotionally Strong Boys
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About those meltdowns, blowups, and one-word answers . . . Some say that's just how boys are—prone to outbursts or sullenness. But what's behind these and other issues? Drawing from twenty-five years of counseling boys and working with parents, David Thomas sheds light on common emotional struggles, including anger, anxiety, and depression, and shares practical ways you can help your son be resourceful, aware, resilient, and empathetic.
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Some helpful tips, but not all good advice
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What listeners say about BoyMom
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Tia Briggs-Sawyer
- 11-04-24
Great read!
I appreciate Whippman’s balanced perspective here. She touched on how patriarchal norms hurt boys and girls, women and men.
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- Alexandra
- 12-05-24
The Most Impactful Parenting Book I’ve Read
Do not miss this book. It is truly transformative, and will provide you with profound insight into how to be the best possible feminist mother to your sweet boy.
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- Client d'Amazon
- 08-24-24
Outstanding analysis
Anyone who is raising a boy or wants to ensure our nation’s boys thrive should read this book.
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- Rebekah
- 12-13-24
Completely Changed my Perspective of my Two Boys
Anyone that has a boy needs to read this book. It is insightful, enlightening, and honestly mind blowing. It brought up stereotypes that are so ingrained I had no idea that I subscribed to them. The research behind this book is incredible, all of the interviews, places she ventured to, and boys online she talks to is so interesting. I cannot recommend this book enough. I will be rereading this book every few years while I raise my boys to keep all of the information fresh. Oh and I loved that the author read it, she has a great accent and voice that is fun to listen to.
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- SDMama
- 09-17-24
Fantastic
This is a book that everyone should read, whether you’re a Boy Mom or not. Thank you to Ruth Whippman for starting this conversation!
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- Kakki
- 07-15-24
Amazing book - relevant for all
This is one of the best books I have read in a long time. I am a mother of two young boys so was drawn to this, but as I begin listening I really felt everyone should read this book. I have five brothers who have struggled in various ways, one of which died by suicide about 10 years ago. I deeply related to a lot of the things she describes, from folks being sympathetic that I have two boys, to the crucial human connection that boys often miss out on in this life. I felt her accounting was very honest, nuanced, and straightforward. Highly recommend!
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- Débora
- 09-18-24
Some good points that take too long to come up
I wanted to read this hopping that would provide insights based on something. although there are some valid points, the author takes too long describing her own experience, but also painting a general picture that just seems too exaggerated and with no support apart from hear say.
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- somethingusual
- 12-06-24
"consent is a murky concept"
I was looking for practical advice about raising emotionally intelligent boys and I got none of that from this book. The author goes into lengthy deliberations about whether "the men are ones who are now oppressed" as a result of feminists' work. She interviews incels and convicted rapists and somehow comes to a conclusion that consent is now a murky concept that became too hard for modern boys to grasp, among other ridiculous statements. I will be asking for a refund and I wish I could get my time back after listening to this.
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