The Soul of Discipline
The Simplicity Parenting Approach to Warm, Firm, and Calm Guidance—from Toddlers to Teens
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Narrated by:
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Christopher Brown
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By:
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Kim John Payne
About this listen
In this groundbreaking book, parenting expert and acclaimed author of the bestselling book Simplicity Parenting Kim John Payne, M.Ed., flips the script on children’s challenging or defiant behavior and lays out an elegantly simple plan to support parents in establishing loving, age-sensitive boundaries that help children feel safe and settled. In short: What looks like misbehavior is actually your children’s signal that they’re feeling lost, that they are trying to find direction and looking to you to guide them back on course.
Payne gives parents heartwarming help and encouragement by combining astute observations with sensitive and often funny stories from his long career as a parent educator and a school and family counselor. In accessible language, he explains the relevance of current brain- and child-development studies to day-to-day parenting. Breaking the continuum of childhood into three stages, Payne says that parents need to play three different roles, each corresponding to one of those stages, to help steer children through their emotional growth and inevitable challenging times:
• The Governor, who is comfortably and firmly in charge—setting limits and making decisions for the early years up to around the age of eight
• The Gardener, who watches for emotional growth and makes decisions based on careful listening, assisting tweens in making plans that take the whole family’s needs into account
• The Guide, who is both a sounding board and moral compass for emerging adults, helping teens build a sense of their life’s direction as a way to influence healthy decision making
Practical and rooted in common sense, The Soul of Discipline gives parents permission to be warm and nurturing but also calm and firm (not overreactive). It gives clear, doable strategies to get things back on track for parents who sense that their children’s behavior has fallen into a troubling pattern. And best of all, it provides healthy direction to the entire family so parents can spend less time and energy on outmoded, punitive discipline and more on connecting with and enjoying their kids.
Advance praise for The Soul of Discipline
“The Soul of Discipline offers practical tools for helping parents implement discipline that’s respectful and effective, but the book is so much more. Kim John Payne offers a framework to guide parents in making decisions about why, when, and how to hold tighter reins as we build skills in our children, and why, when, and how to loosen the reins as we scaffold freedom.”—Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D., co-author of No-Drama Discipline
“This book gets deep inside the challenge of getting along with children and teens and thinks deeply about what they need from us to become strong and self-managing. It elevates discipline to what it should be—a caring process of helping kids orient to the world and live in it happily and well.”—Steve Biddulph, author of The New Manhood
“Kim Payne provides a useful model for choosing our parenting stance—Governor, Gardener, or Guide—depending on the situation. Most powerfully, Payne begins with the radical view that children are not disobedient but rather disoriented. The upshot of this shift in perspective is that discipline is about helping children orient themselves effectively, not about controlling or chastising.”—Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D., author of Playful Parenting
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“The Soul of Discipline draws on Kim John Payne’s years of gifted school and family counseling to show us with its clear and simple tone how to discipline without becoming our children’s enemy. It is filled with memorable stories, dialogues that will engage your imagination, and great strategies. By the book’s end, a new picture of parenting will live in you, one that will honor the soul of your children as you provide the structure, training, and guidance they need at each stage of their development.”—Dee Joy Coulter, Ed.D., author of Original Mind
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Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are - these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a best-selling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and more.
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very well thought out but not for everyone
- By Trudy Owens on 01-01-19
By: Deborah Reber
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The Gentle Sleep Book
- For Calm Babies, Toddlers and Pre-Schoolers
- By: Sarah Ockwell-Smith
- Narrated by: Katy Sobey
- Length: 8 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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The Gentle Sleep Book offers gentle, no-tears sleep solutions for exhausted parents of newborns to five-year-olds. A large percentage of parents find their young children's sleep - or lack of - challenging. This new audiobook from Sarah Ockwell-Smith, founder of BabyCalm, will be an indispensable guide for parents, whatever challenges they are facing with their child's sleep - from the day they bring their newborn home until their child is settled in at school.
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It's fine but not much about 2-4 years
- By Patrick on 02-12-18
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The Available Parent
- Expert Advice for Raising Successful and Resilient Teens and Tweens
- By: John Duffy
- Narrated by: David Colacci
- Length: 5 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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We have a tendency today to over-parent, micromanage, and underappreciate our adolescents. Dr. John Duffy's The Available Parent is a revolutionary approach to taking care of teens and tweens. The available parent of a teenager is open to discussion, offering advice and solutions but not insisting on them. He allows his child to make some mistakes, setting limits, primarily where health and safety are concerned. He never lectures - he is available but not controlling. He is neither cruel nor dismissive, ever....
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Parenting teens can be much less stressful!
- By Kathi on 06-12-14
By: John Duffy
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It's OK to Go up the Slide
- Renegade Rules for Raising Confident and Creative Kids
- By: Heather Shumaker
- Narrated by: Laurel Lefkow
- Length: 9 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Heather Shumaker has sparked much discussion with her "renegade rules for raising competent and compassionate kids". In this follow-up book, she takes on new hot-button issues like banning homework, technology use, and skipping kindergarten. Shumaker offers broader guidance on how parents can control their own anger and move from an overscheduled life to one of more free play.
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Amazing resource for parents and teachers
- By Ahmed on 05-11-16
By: Heather Shumaker
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How Toddlers Thrive
- What Parents Can Do Today for Children Ages 2-5 to Plant the Seeds of Lifelong Success
- By: Tovah P. Klein PhD
- Narrated by: Tovah P. Klein PhD, Sarah Jessica Parker - foreword
- Length: 10 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Why do some children thrive and others struggle? The answers may surprise you. New research indicates that the seeds for adult success are actually planted in the toddler years. Dr. Tovah Klein's research and firsthand work with thousands of toddlers explains why the toddler brain is best suited to laying the foundation for success. Dr. Klein reveals the new science behind drivers such as resilience, self-reliance, self-regulation, and empathy that are more critical to success than simple intelligence.
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Redundant
- By odotwu on 05-08-18
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Safe House
- How Emotional Safety Is the Key to Raising Kids Who Live, Love, and Lead Well
- By: Joshua Straub PhD
- Narrated by: Mike Chamberlain
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Parenting isn't rocket science, it's just brain surgery. And Dr. Joshua Straub has good news for you: You can do it! You don't need to do all the "right" things as a parent. Both science and the Bible show us that the most important thing we can provide for our kids is a place of emotional safety. In other words, the posture from which we parent matters infinitely more than the techniques of parenting. Emotional safety - more than any other factor - is scientifically linked to raising kids who live, love, and lead well.
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Great ideas, not so good narrator
- By Alan on 02-18-16
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Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Became Parents
- By: Shannon Warden, Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 4 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Gary Chapman has helped millions prepare for marriage. Now let him prepare you for kids. Inside, Gary shares what he wishes he and his wife had known before having kids. For example: Children affect your time, your money, and your marriage - and that's just the beginning. With his trademark warmth, he offers practical advice on everything from potty training, to the importance of apologizing to your child, to keeping your marriage strong, all the while celebrating the great joy that children bring.
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Good tips
- By Alex Ilyaev on 03-25-19
By: Shannon Warden, and others
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Positive Parenting
- An Essential Guide
- By: Rebecca Eanes
- Narrated by: Callie Beaulieu
- Length: 5 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Popular parenting blogger Rebecca Eanes shares her hard-won wisdom for overcoming limiting thought patterns and recognizing emotional triggers, as well as advice for connecting with kids at each stage, from infancy to adolescence. This heartfelt, insightful advice comes not from an "expert," but from a learning, evolving parent.
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It saved my life
- By Samantha khalil on 05-22-17
By: Rebecca Eanes
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The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child
- By: Alan Kazdin
- Narrated by: L. J. Ganser
- Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Most child-behavior books are filled with advice that sounds reasonable, fits with what parents already believe about child-rearing, and isas Dr. Kazdin proves guaranteed to fail. The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child makes available to parents for the first time Dr. Kazdins proven program, one backed up by some of the most long-term and respected research devoted to any therapy for children.
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Same old same old
- By Amazon Customer on 10-26-10
By: Alan Kazdin
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Parenting ADHD Now!
- Easy Intervention Strategies to Empower Kids with ADHD
- By: Elaine Taylor-Klaus, Diane Dempster
- Narrated by: Eliza Foss
- Length: 5 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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In Parenting ADHD Now!, Diane and Elaine combine their practical know-how and professional expertise to offer immediate, actionable strategies you can use to guide and support your ADHD child compassionately and effectively.
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wonderful strategies
- By Niki Stein on 04-19-19
By: Elaine Taylor-Klaus, and others
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The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans
- How to Decode Their Behavior, Develop Unshakable Trust, and Raise a Respectable Adult
- By: Josh Shipp
- Narrated by: Roger Wayne
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Written in Shipp's playfully authoritative, no-nonsense voice, The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans tells his story and unpacks practical strategies that can make a difference. Ultimately, it's not about shortcuts or magic words - as Shipp reminds us, it's about investing in kids and giving them the love, time, and support they need to thrive. And that means every kid is one caring adult away from being a success story.
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Read it....then read it again!
- By R. Eichelberger on 11-07-17
By: Josh Shipp
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Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours
- By: Kevin Leman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 7 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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We have seen the enemy . . . and they are small. If anyone understands why children behave the way they do, it's psychologist and best-selling author Dr. Kevin Leman. Equipping you with seven principles of Reality Discipline, this father of five shows you how to get kids to do what you want them to do, foil finicky eaters, turn off temper tantrums, and minimize sibling rivalries, use authority and decisiveness to show your kids you're not a pushover, and know when to take the little buzzards by the beak.
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Life Saver for you and your kid!
- By Amber on 09-21-10
By: Kevin Leman
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Now Say This
- The Right Words to Solve Every Parenting Dilemma
- By: Heather Turgeon MFT, Julie Wright MFT
- Narrated by: Heather Turgeon MFT, Julie Wright MFT
- Length: 7 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Now Say This guides parents through a highly practical three-step approach to effectively communicating with children called ALP. It also discusses the power of words in all of our daily conversations. Each chapter addresses a different aspect of parenting and includes actual scripts and precise language for parents to use to set limits with empathy and to use conversations as opportunities for learning. Language is powerful, and the exact words, tone, and nonverbal communication parents use when trying to move through a sticky moment with their child means everything.
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Lots of useful examples
- By Christiane on 04-22-19
By: Heather Turgeon MFT, and others
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Autism Breakthrough
- The Groundbreaking Method That Has Helped Families All over the World
- By: Raun K. Kaufman
- Narrated by: Raun K. Kaufman
- Length: 8 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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As a boy, Raun Kaufman was diagnosed by multiple experts as severely autistic, with an IQ below 30, and destined to spend his life in an institution. Years later, Raun graduated with a degree in biomedical ethics from Brown University and has become a passionate and articulate autism expert and educator with no trace of his former condition. Thanks to the Son-Rise Program, a revolutionary method created by his parents, Raun experienced a full recovery from autism.
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A great approach.
- By DNP on 12-01-16
By: Raun K. Kaufman
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Parenting with Presence
- Practices for Raising Conscious, Confident, Caring Kids
- By: Susan Stiffelman
- Narrated by: Polly Stone
- Length: 8 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Our children can be our greatest teachers. Parenting expert Susan Stiffelman writes that the very behaviors that push our buttons - refusing to cooperate or ignoring our requests - can help us build awareness and shed old patterns, allowing us to raise our children with greater ease and enjoyment.
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fantastic
- By Sarah Prentice on 06-26-16
By: Susan Stiffelman
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Several comments on the brain were incorrect.
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Inspired by the spirit of Henry David Thoreau—"All good things are wild and free"—mother of five Ainsley Arment founded Wild + Free. This growing online community of mothers and families want their children to receive a quality education at home by challenging their intellectual abilities and nurturing their sense of curiosity, joy, and awe—the essence of a positive childhood. The homeschool approach of past generations is gone—including the stigma of socially awkward kids, conservative clothes, and a classroom setting replicated in the home.
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Very enriching!
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The Jesus Storybook Bible
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The Jesus Storybook Bible is very different from every other kids’ Bibles. While other kids’ Bibles contain stories from the Old and New Testaments, The Jesus Storybook Bible tells the Story beneath all the stories in the Bible, pointing to Jesus as our Savior.
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Love the book, Love the audio even more
- By Julie on 02-10-12
What listeners say about The Soul of Discipline
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Sarah Lee South
- 09-05-24
Excellent!
This is my favorite parenting book of all time (and I’ve read a lot). If you are looking for clear guidance for raising and guiding children, this book is it.
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