Preview
  • If at Birth You Don't Succeed

  • My Adventures with Disaster and Destiny
  • By: Zach Anner
  • Narrated by: Zach Anner
  • Length: 10 hrs and 16 mins
  • 4.7 out of 5 stars (1,159 ratings)

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If at Birth You Don't Succeed

By: Zach Anner
Narrated by: Zach Anner
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Publisher's summary

Comedian Zach Anner opens his frank and devilishly funny book, If at Birth You Don't Succeed, with an admission: He botched his own birth. Two months early, underweight and underprepared for life, he entered the world with cerebral palsy and an uncertain future. So how did this hairless mole rat of a boy blossom into a viral Internet sensation who's hosted two travel shows, impressed Oprah, driven the Mars Rover, and inspired a John Mayer song? (It wasn't "Your Body is a Wonderland".)

Zach lives by the mantra: When life gives you a wheelchair, make lemonade. Whether recounting a valiant childhood attempt to woo Cindy Crawford, encounters with zealous faith healers, or the time he crapped his pants mere feet from Dr. Phil, Zach shares his fumbles with unflinching honesty and characteristic charm. By his 30th birthday, Zach had grown into an adult with a career in entertainment, millions of fans, a loving family, and friends who would literally carry him up mountains.

If at Birth You Don't Succeed is a hilariously irreverent and heartfelt memoir about finding your passion and your path even when it's paved with epic misadventure. This is the unlikely but not unlucky story of a man who couldn't safely open a bag of Skittles but still became a fitness guru with fans around the world. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll fall in love with the Olive Garden all over again and learn why cerebral palsy is, definitively, "the sexiest of the palsies".

©2016 Zachary Dean Anner (P)2016 Macmillan Audio
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What listeners say about If at Birth You Don't Succeed

Average customer ratings
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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Laugh out loud good time

I am pretty new to Zach. Having watched his workout Wednesday videos for only a few months now I have grown to love the way he views the world. Now I have had the pleasure of reading his book. And I loved it. Zach is someone I hope to hang out with some day. Great boon. Great story telling. And tons of fun.

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1 person found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

So wonderful

This was a great story about the ups and downs of Zach's life. I really enjoyed the way it was read.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Encore! Encore!

Zach Anner delivers his candid and irreverent views on coming of age, finding love, and crapping your pants.

I appreciated Zach's hilarious delivery of a very personal narrative. The book chronicles Zach's incredible 30 year life. His stories inspired me like good vinyl on repeat and I will refer back to them frequently. Being as open as he was is compelling, but I often felt the urge to applaud at regular intervals. I love being around people who hunt positivity and while I don't know Zach personally, I can now have his optimism and zeal in my life at a moment's notice.

I wish him the best of luck and I want more Zach Anner. Consider this my lighter thrust in the sky as I passively beg for an encore.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Inspirational, motivating, and hilarious

Last year I stumbled upon Zach Anner's YouTube page. I was instantly floored by his impeccable comedic timing. From the first "Workout Wednesday" I saw, I was hooked. This book is an extension of that plus so much more. Zach is incredibly witty and his message is so positive that you can't help but feel better about everything after listening to him. Anyone in your life will benefit from listening to this book.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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A triumph of making the most of the life you've been given.

Great story of living the best life you can, despite obstacles. Not a boo hoo story but a triumph of making the most of it. I appreciate that the author read it himself. To the author: Through humor, your videos and this book, motivate others to be the best version of themselves and remind us to never give up. Truly an inspiration. Bravo!

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Brimming with Contagious Optimism

Every second of this book made me smile. Thank you, Zach, for.... For being just the way you are.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Really fantastic

Zach really put his heart and soul into this book. I laughed pretty much the whole way through, and while I didn't cry like he said I might, I really enjoyed the telling of his more somber and difficult moments in life. I'm a sucker for books narrated by the author, and I don't think this book would have been as good if it had been read by anyone other than Zach. I try not to judge a person by how they look, but I did realize that I can be much better at talking to someone before assuming anything about them. Zach is super funny and optimistic, and I feel like we're kindred spirits, even if I don't have a sexy palsy.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

...write a book about it.

Zach Anner portrays the ups, downs, pitfalls, pratfalls, and insanely good luck that has come upon his life. Talent can get people started, but hard work and effort is what carries people through at the end of the day, and it is clear that Anner has worked his entire life while making sure to acknowledge that the people around him worked even harder to support him.

With adequate pacing and good tone of voice, Anner is capable of being all sarcastic, optimistic, and reflective. He knows his memoir best. An excellent listen and read for people in all walks of life who may be enjoying the ups, or experiencing the lows, Anner reminds us that we are all too human and even the best of us make mistakes, have worries, and have things never go perfectly to plan. Perseverance is a keystone of life whether it involves keeping your tummy troubles in rein, mountain climbing, or trying to find love across the globe.

True rating: 4.5 stars out of 5.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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What a positive attitude!

This past July I had the pleasure of seeing and listening to Zach as the keynote speaker at a conference in Vail, CO. I had never heard of him and had no clue what his talk would be about. Needless to say he was one terrific speaker, going into a lot of detail about his life encounters as disabled individual. It was very moving. His talk was enhanced with his YouTube videos, showing day-to-day activities and the difficulties he had to get around, all presented with a sense of humor. The one I recommend watching would be his travels to a bagel shop in NYC that offered rainbow bagels and the length of time it took him to get from one borough to another in a wheelchair. It is a real eye opener of obstacles people with wheelchairs face in getting around on a day-to-day basis, but Zach was not to be deterred. He has an incredible support system, starting with his parents, who let him be himself and not hinder him because of his disability. Needless to say, this presentation led me to listen to his book and anyone who would give it less than 4 stars does not appreciate his determination to live his life as normally as possible. I am so glad I had this opportunity. To me, the motto of his life is "don't sweat the small stuff."

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Great audible book

I loved this book! Zach Anner is a delight! He is smart, articulate, inspirational, and truly hilarious. I listened to the book while I walked our neighborhood for exercise and found myself laughing out loud. I ended up going for longer walks because I was so entertained. I hope to attend one of his speaking engagements here in Austin in the future.

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