Midlife Bites
Anyone Else Falling Apart, or Is It Just Me?
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Narrated by:
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Jen Mann
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By:
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Jen Mann
About this listen
A smart, personal, darkly funny examination of what it’s like to be a woman at the crossroads of a midlife crisis, from the New York Times best-selling author of People I Want to Punch in the Throat
“I inhaled this book in one sitting; it’s a must-read for anyone over 40. This should become the gift all girlfriends give one another.” (Zibby Owens, host of the award-winning podcast Moms Don’t Have Time to Read Books)
Jen Mann had what appeared to be the perfect life: a successful career as a best-selling author and award-winning blogger, a devoted husband, teenage kids who weren’t total jerks, and a badass minivan. So imagine her surprise when, at 47 years old, a midlife crisis kicked her straight in the ladybits.
Midlife Bites offers Jen’s trademark wit and honesty when it comes to important conversations and observations about women in midlife. Here, listeners will be able to come together and find anecdotes and practical ideas to help navigate through this major point in their lives. For women who may feel isolated or overlooked, this collection of original essays offers valuable insights, takeaways, and, most important, a productive way forward. Jen shares her own story as well as advice and wisdom from the online community she built, tackling everything that bites about midlife, where nothing is off-limits: raging hormones; sex (after 40); finding your purpose; learning to make new friends (yes, even as a grown-up); moving out of your comfort zone; having conversations that count, no more small talk; and how to deal with rogue chin hairs (and other nuisances).
Jen Mann is leading the movement to create a new space where middle-aged women can share openly and honestly with one another. This no-BS collection of essays will help start the conversation and keep it going, because as women, we all have a right to be happy, fulfilled, and whole, no matter what stage of life.
©2022 Jen Mann (P)2022 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“One part instruction manual (or maybe destruction manual?), one part group therapy, and all kinds of hilarious, Midlife Bites made the prospect of hitting my mid-forties seem a lot more manageable and a lot less mystifying. Jen Mann is leading the midlife revolution, and I am so here for it!” (Sarah Knight, New York Times best-selling author of The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck)
“Jen Mann does it again with Midlife Bites, proving that she's one of the most honest—and funniest—voices out there. Readers will laugh, cheer, and sometimes cringe at how perceptively she sums up the midlife experience. Buy this book for all your girlfriends—they’ll thank you!” (Jen Lancaster, New York Times best-selling author of Welcome to the United States of Anxiety and Bitter Is the New Black)
“If you’ve ever felt like you’re screaming into the void alone, you’re not. Jen Mann is there. Admittedly and masterfully out of her comfort zone, Jen comes at her midlife self with a wallop of self-introspection and vulnerability, thereby giving all of us permission to say the paralyzing quiet parts out LOUD. Every woman who reads this book will say thank you, Jen Mann, in between snorts and sniffles.” (Faith Salie, author of Approval Junkie and panelist on NPR’s Wait Wait…Don’t Tell Me!)
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Jen Mann doesn't have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of moms' night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship, nothing's sacred or off-limits.
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Boring, not funny, and kind of mean
- By Jess on 11-22-19
By: Jen Mann
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Idiots
- Marriage, Motherhood, Milk & Mistakes
- By: Laura Clery
- Narrated by: Laura Clery
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
A fresh, hilarious, and relatable collection of essays about everything from motherhood and marriage to sobriety and work-life balance (or imbalance) from the nationally bestselling author of the “honest, complicated” (SheKnows) Idiot.
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Tears and laughs!!
- By Anonymous User on 04-07-22
By: Laura Clery
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This Is Not Over
- A Novel
- By: Holly Brown
- Narrated by: Madeleine Maby, Donna Postel
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Two very different women with this in common: Each harbors her own secret, her own reason why she can't just let this go. Neither can yield, not before they've dredged up all that's hidden, even if it has the power to shatter all they've built.
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Pettiness Turn Twisted!
- By Jenn on 01-19-17
By: Holly Brown
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Ask Wendy
- By: Wendy Williams
- Narrated by: Wendy Williams
- Length: 5 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
On TV, Wendy only has a few minutes to respond to each audience member, but in Ask Wendy she goes deeper, answering questions sourced from viewers across the country. No question is off-limits and no situation is too outrageous for her to take on. Wendy shoots straight from those womanly hips of hers to help you manage all the crazy that comes into your life - keepin' it real by drawing on the personal experiences that have shaped her unique perspective.
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HIlarious
- By Shelley Thomas-Robinson on 10-24-17
By: Wendy Williams
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Dirty Thirty
- By: Asa Akira
- Narrated by: Veronica Worthington
- Length: 5 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
As she contemplates turning 30 years old while still being in the adult film trade, Asa Akira, author of the best-seller Insatiable, delves into her past, present, and future, exploring the events that brought her to where she is now and the surprising and insightful plans she has for her future. Internationally known as a porn star, Akira's perceptive, funny, and straightforward writings on love, sex, death, marriage, and celebrity come together in a surprising book of essays.
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this was fun I'm going to buy her other book 2
- By Sir Lawrence on 01-09-19
By: Asa Akira
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I'll Be There (But I'll Be Wearing Sweatpants)
- Finding Unfiltered, Real-Life Friendships in This Crazy, Chaotic World
- By: Amy Weatherly, Jess Johnston
- Narrated by: Amy Weatherly, Jess Johnston
- Length: 5 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Loneliness doesn't care what age you are, how many Instagram followers you have, or where you call home. It doesn't care how "put together" you appear to the outside world. We have a collective wound that only authentic sisterhood can heal. With real-life vulnerability and "I’ve been there, too" wisdom about building deep and satisfying friendships, Amy and Jess unpack the lies we've been told about friendship
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Heavy religious content slightly off-putting
- By Gary on 03-12-22
By: Amy Weatherly, and others
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Off with My Head
- The Definitive Basic B*tch Handbook to Surviving Rock Bottom
- By: Stassi Schroeder
- Narrated by: Stassi Schroeder
- Length: 7 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The year 2020 was going to be the best year of Stassi’s life. Besides getting engaged and feeling like she was on top of the world career-wise, she bought her first house and was planning her dream Italian wedding. The future showed so much freaking promise—until it all went to hell. Stassi may not be perfect—she may have made some (major) mistakes—but she does feel like she has some insight (and plenty of hilarious tales) about getting knocked up, called out, and learning from what went wrong.
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Really Wanted to Like This, But...
- By Cathie on 08-09-23
By: Stassi Schroeder
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The Journal of Best Practices
- A Memoir of Marriage, Asperger Syndrome, and One Man's Quest to Be a Better Husband
- By: David Finch
- Narrated by: David Finch
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
At some point in nearly every marriage, a wife finds herself asking, "What is wrong with my husband?!" In David Finch's case, this turns out to be an apt question. Five years after he married Kristen, the love of his life, they learn that he has Asperger syndrome. The diagnosis explains David's ever-growing list of quirks and compulsions, his lifelong propensity to quack and otherwise melt down in social exchanges, and his clinical-strength inflexibility. But it doesn't make him any easier to live with.
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I wish I had read this many years ago
- By Patrick on 05-02-12
By: David Finch
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Miss Fortune
- Fresh Perspectives on Having It All from Someone Who Is Not Okay
- By: Lauren Weedman
- Narrated by: Lauren Weedman
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Lauren Weedman is not okay. She's living what should be the good life in sunny Los Angeles. After a gig as a correspondent with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, she scored parts in blockbuster movies, which led to memorable recurring roles on HBO's Hung and Looking. She had a loving husband and an adorable baby boy. In these comedic essays, she turns a piercingly observant, darkly funny lens on the ways her life is actually not okay.
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Good
- By Ajules29 on 04-02-16
By: Lauren Weedman
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Small Admissions
- A Novel
- By: Amy Poeppel
- Narrated by: Carly Robins
- Length: 9 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Despite her innate ambition and summa cum laude smarts, Kate Pearson has turned into a major slacker. After being dumped by her handsome French "almost fiancé", she abandons her grad school plans and spends her days lolling on the couch, leaving her apartment only when a dog-walking gig demands it. Her friends don't know what to do other than pass tissues and hope for a comeback while her practical sister, Angela, pushes every remedy she can think of, from trapeze class to therapy to job interviews.
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For fans of "Where'd You Go, Bernadette ?"
- By RueRue on 01-16-17
By: Amy Poeppel
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Dear Girls Above Me
- Inspired by a True Story
- By: Charles McDowell
- Narrated by: Kirby Heyborne
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When Charlie McDowell began sharing his open letters to his noisy upstairs neighbors - two impossibly ditzy female roommates in their mid-twenties - on Twitter, his feed quickly went viral. His followers multiplied and he got the attention of everyone from celebrities to production studios to major media outlets such as Time and Glamour.
Now Dear Girls breaks out of the 140-character limit as Charlie imagines what would happen if he put the wisdom of the girls to the test.
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An Enjoyable Listen
- By Elle W on 11-05-13
By: Charles McDowell
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Does This Baby Make Me Look Straight?
- Confessions of a Gay Dad
- By: Dan Bucatinsky
- Narrated by: Dan Bucatinsky
- Length: 5 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In 2005, Dan Bucatinsky and his partner, Don Roos, found themselves in an L.A. delivery room, decked out in disposable scrubs from shower cap to booties, to welcome their adopted baby girl - launching their frantic yet memorable adventures into fatherhood. Two and a half years later, the same birth mother - a heroically generous, pack-a-day teen with a passion for Bridezilla marathons and Mountain Dew - delivered a son into the couple’s arms.
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A Parenting Book with Humor and Heart
- By The Reading Date on 02-05-14
By: Dan Bucatinsky
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She Memes Well
- By: Quinta Brunson
- Narrated by: Quinta Brunson
- Length: 8 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
From comedian Quinta Brunson (creator and star of Abbott Elementary) comes a deeply personal and funny collection of essays about trying to make it when you're struggling, the importance of staying true to your roots, and how she's redefined humor online. In her debut essay collection, Quinta applies her trademark humor and heart to discuss what it was like to go from a girl who loved the World Wide Web to a girl whose face launched a thousand memes. This special Audible edition includes never-before-heard details about the making of Abbott Elementary.
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That moment you know you’re a TEACHER…
- By chrissybrown on 09-19-22
By: Quinta Brunson
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The Very Worst Missionary
- A Memoir or Whatever
- By: Jamie Wright
- Narrated by: Madeleine Lambert
- Length: 4 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
After finding Jesus at a suburban megachurch, young Jamie Wright trades in the easy life on the cul-de-sac for the green fields of Costa Rica. There, along with her husband, kids, and the family cat, she intends to serve God and make converts. But she soon loses faith and falls into a funk of cynicism and despair. Fortunately, Knives the cat is there, looking on with just enough disinterest to make her laugh...and dare her to try another way. That other way turns out to be telling the truth. She launches a renegade blog, Jamie the Very Worst Missionary, which wins a large following.
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Didn’t like the book
- By Jonathan on 04-17-20
By: Jamie Wright
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Girl, Wash Your Face
- Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are So You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be
- By: Rachel Hollis
- Narrated by: Rachel Hollis
- Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
As the founder of the lifestyle website TheChicSite.com and CEO of her own media company, Rachel Hollis developed an immense online community by sharing tips for better living while fearlessly revealing the messiness of her own life. Now, in this challenging and inspiring new book, Rachel exposes the 20 lies and misconceptions that too often hold us back from living joyfully and productively.
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More for women who are mothers
- By MeredithNCSU girl on 04-07-18
By: Rachel Hollis
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Your body is incredible, but it’s also out to destroy you. Your brain is like an early computer operating system, riddled with bad code, slow to load, and more likely to watch cat memes than go to sleep. You’d be a mess without your skeleton, but it can be a bony cage if you’re tortured by backaches, niggling neck pain, and knee joints that crumble under pressure. And your nose is a design disaster, getting blocked, springing leaks, and growing random tufts of hair.
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Not very scientific, tone is fear mongering
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Moonology
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Have you ever tried to make something work and it just felt impossible? This audiobook may well be the missing link you need. Understanding the moon's magical eight phases will help you to improve and empower every aspect of your life. You will know better what to expect in the days ahead, and how to time important events in your life, from sending a crucial email to getting married!
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No links or pdf
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Human Design
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World-leading expert Jenna Zoe reveals the power and potential of Human Design in simple steps and shows you how to utilize your results to create an incredible life. Drawing inspiration from many different schools of wisdom, including the chakras, I Ching, astrology, and the Tree of Life, Human Design is a system based on our time and date of birth, illustrated as a unique chart that reveals our opportunities, challenges, personality, strengths, relationships, and much more.
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Lost
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When you think of serial killers throughout history, the names that come to mind are ones like Jack the Ripper, John Wayne Gacy, and Ted Bundy. But what about Tillie Klimek, Moulay Hassan, Kate Bender? The narrative we’re comfortable with is the one where women are the victims of violent crime, not the perpetrators. In fact, serial killers are thought to be so universally, overwhelmingly male that in 1998, FBI profiler Roy Hazelwood infamously declared in a homicide conference, “There are no female serial killers.”
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An ode to arsenic
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 03-04-24
By: Tori Telfer
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When Laura Costello moves to Los Angeles, trying to escape an overprotective family and the haunting memories of a terrible accident, she doesn’t expect to be homeless after a week. (She’s pretty sure she didn’t start that fire—right?) She also doesn't expect to find herself adopted by a rogue bookseller, installed in a lovely but completely illegal boardinghouse, or challenged to save a losing trivia team from ignominy…but that’s what happens.
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Read it 3 times so far!
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Your body is incredible, but it’s also out to destroy you. Your brain is like an early computer operating system, riddled with bad code, slow to load, and more likely to watch cat memes than go to sleep. You’d be a mess without your skeleton, but it can be a bony cage if you’re tortured by backaches, niggling neck pain, and knee joints that crumble under pressure. And your nose is a design disaster, getting blocked, springing leaks, and growing random tufts of hair.
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Title is misleading
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Fatal Conveniences
- The Toxic Products and Harmful Habits That Are Making You Sick—and the Simple Changes That Will Save Your Health
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Fatal conveniences are the toxic products we routinely use and the unhealthy things we do that our culture and corporations have made us believe are safe and necessary for living well and efficiently. These things—from deodorant, cosmetics, dental floss, and sunscreen to laundry detergent, air fresheners, carpets, and crayons to candles, tea bags, cell phones, and chewing gum—are ubiquitous in daily life . . . and they are wreaking havoc on our health and our planet.
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Not very scientific, tone is fear mongering
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Human Design
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World-leading expert Jenna Zoe reveals the power and potential of Human Design in simple steps and shows you how to utilize your results to create an incredible life. Drawing inspiration from many different schools of wisdom, including the chakras, I Ching, astrology, and the Tree of Life, Human Design is a system based on our time and date of birth, illustrated as a unique chart that reveals our opportunities, challenges, personality, strengths, relationships, and much more.
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Lost
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When you think of serial killers throughout history, the names that come to mind are ones like Jack the Ripper, John Wayne Gacy, and Ted Bundy. But what about Tillie Klimek, Moulay Hassan, Kate Bender? The narrative we’re comfortable with is the one where women are the victims of violent crime, not the perpetrators. In fact, serial killers are thought to be so universally, overwhelmingly male that in 1998, FBI profiler Roy Hazelwood infamously declared in a homicide conference, “There are no female serial killers.”
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Enchantment. By Dr. Sharon Blackie’s definition, a vivid sense of belongingness to a rich and many-layered world, a profound and whole-hearted participation in the adventure of life. Enchantment is a natural, spontaneous human tendency - one we possess as children, but lose, through social and cultural pressures, as we grow older. It is an attitude of mind which can be cultivated: the enchanted life is possible for anyone. It is intuitive, embraces wonder, and fully engages the mythic imagination - but it is also deeply embodied in ecology, grounded in place and community.
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A very disenchanting book
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This Is Your Mind on Plants
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Of all the things humans rely on plants for - sustenance, beauty, medicine, fragrance, flavor, fiber - surely the most curious is our use of them to change consciousness: to stimulate or calm, fiddle with or completely alter, the qualities of our mental experience. Take coffee and tea: People around the world rely on caffeine to sharpen their minds. But we do not usually think of caffeine as a drug, or our daily use as an addiction, because it is legal and socially acceptable.
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This is a clip show.
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Witch
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A witch is a wise woman, a healer. Yet for so long the word witch has had negative connotations. In this book, third generation hereditary witch Lisa Lister explains the history behind witchcraft, why identifying as a healer in past centuries led women to be burned at the stake, and why the witch is reawakening in women across the world today. This book provides an overview of the different schools of witchcraft and the core principles and practices within them.
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Probably better to get physical book
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How Do I Un-Remember This?
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Growing up in small-town Ohio isn't easy, particularly when you're a closeted gay kid surrounded by...no one openly gay. Luckily, Danny Pellegrino grew up in the '90s, coming of age when the internet opened up a whole new world for a curious kid itching for life outside of Midwest suburbia.
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Danny, my best friend
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By: Danny Pellegrino
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Missing Witches
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As seekers and practitioners reclaim and restore magic to its rightful place among powerful forces for social, personal, and political transformation, more people than ever are claiming the identity of "witch". But our knowledge of witchcraft and magic has been marred by erasure, sensationalism, and sterilization, the true stories of history's witches left untold. Through meditations, stories, and practices, authors Risa Dickens and Amy Torok offer an intersectional, contemporary lens for uncovering and reconnecting with feminist witch history.
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What a beautiful book
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Reset
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You want to break free from unhealthy habits and replace them with positive patterns, but when you’ve tried to make these changes before, you found yourself returning to old behaviors. How can you make sure that this time is different? With Reset, author and professional counselor Debra Fileta will guide you through thirty-one powerful and sustainable practices that will help you transform your thought patterns.
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A must read!
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By: Debra Fileta, and others
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Bad Monkeys
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Jane Charlotte has been arrested for murder. She tells police that she is a member of a secret organization devoted to fighting evil; her division is called the Department for the Final Disposition of Irredeemable Persons - "Bad Monkeys" for short. This confession earns Jane a trip to the jail’s psychiatric wing, where a doctor attempts to determine whether she is lying, crazy, or playing a different game altogether.
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Young Adult novel..
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Afraid
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About a third of the world population suffers from an anxiety disorder, and half of Americans have had at least one traumatic experience like rape, assault, shooting, or natural disasters. Fear and anxiety are with us everywhere we go. Fear is deeply woven into our biology, culture, politics, and day to day life. We sometimes don't even know what we are afraid of. What we know for sure is that we are afraid too often.But why are we so scared? How does fear work in our brains? What is the evolutionary purpose of fear? In this book, a psychiatrist and neuroscientist answers these questions.
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Wonderfully comprehensive, cogent, compelling, and fluent book on the topic
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If Only I'd Known!
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Narcissistic abuse creates a tidal wave of confusion, hypervigilance, and overthinking. You have trouble thinking clearly, remembering things, or taking in new information. And because these changes are happening to you, you begin to wonder: What's wrong with me? Why can't I make this relationship work? Am I fundamentally broken? And that's exactly how narcissistic abuse works—it happens so subtly that you believe the insecurities you're experiencing are "you" instead of "what's happening" to you. This audiobook covers unique information related to narcissistic abuse.
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This book is amazing.
- By Juan Servin on 01-03-24
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The Sunset Route
- Freight Trains, Forgiveness, and Freedom on the Rails in the American West
- By: Carrot Quinn
- Narrated by: Erin Spencer
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
After a childhood marked by neglect, poverty, and periods of homelessness, with a mother who believed herself to be the reincarnation of the Virgin Mary, Carrot Quinn moved out on her own. She found a sense of belonging among straight-edge anarchists who taught her how to traverse the country by freight trains, sleep in fields under the stars, and feed herself by foraging in dumpsters. Her new life was one of thrilling adventure and freedom, but still she was haunted by the ghosts of her lonely and traumatic childhood.
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Not my usual book
- By Kindle Customer on 10-21-21
By: Carrot Quinn
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Unbroken: The Trauma Response Is Never Wrong
- And Other Things You Need to Know to Take Back Your Life
- By: MaryCatherine McDonald PhD
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Performance
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Story
With Unbroken: The Trauma Response Is Never Wrong, Dr. McDonald overturns the misconceptions about trauma with the latest evidence from neuroscience and psychology—and shares tested practices and tools to help you work with your body’s coping mechanisms to accelerate healing.
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misleading re: key information
- By Placeholder on 08-08-24
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You Will Find Your People
- By: Lane Moore
- Narrated by: Lane Moore
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Story
Like many people navigating adulthood, Lane Moore thought she would have friends by now. Movies, books, and TV shows tell us we should’ve already found our people by the time we’re adults, or there must be something wrong with us. But where do you find these close friends once you’ve left high school or college? Is it even possible? You Will Find Your People is the groundbreaking guide to making—and keeping—the friends we’ve all been desperately waiting for.
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Cringy
- By Rachel on 07-06-23
By: Lane Moore
What listeners say about Midlife Bites
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Rdub
- 01-09-22
witty and relatable
Laughed out loud at several moments. The Next Life No Men chapter rang true and, in light of it, the spirit guide reveal was hilarious. The book reads like chatting with a friend.
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- SamSam
- 05-19-22
That’s The End!?
Loved this book! If you are going through it at 100 miles an hour and your cruise control refuses to work- this book is for you. Thank you for reaching into my head and saying A L L of the things I feel that I’ve been shouting only to fall upon deaf ears.
I feel completely heard.
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- Sam Miller
- 01-15-22
Another Great Read
I’ve thoroughly enjoyed Jen Mann’s other books, and this one didn’t disappoint. A quick read while at work, and great to hear her struggles. Makes people not feel alone. ❤️
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- dawn blake
- 07-16-22
Finally
I'm 55 and for the first time, I can now be okay with no longer having any f..ucks to give. I don't even ever use that word.
Thank you,
Dawn
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- Anonymous User
- 02-02-23
Applies to all ages!
Jen Mann captures the life of nearly every woman at some stage. I’ve probably lived through all of them at this point and relived each one as I listened to Midlife Bites. So comforting to know I’m not alone! Laughs and tears. (Sometimes those tears ran down my leg)
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1 person found this helpful
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- Claire
- 08-28-22
Love this book!
Lots of insight and humor from the author. Lots of heart behind it too. If you’re a fan of Jen Mann, or a woman going through mid life, you’ll love this book.
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- Zumbatini
- 09-23-24
Like catching up with your unhinged friend
An easy listen with extremely relatable stories about navigating middle age. The only downpart was that many women were cliche and common suggestions on how to get through this.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Sara Cummings
- 07-22-23
Life changing
As someone without a bunch of close girl friends, this book was life changing in that it taught me that I what I’m feeling is normal!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Amy Wasker
- 07-13-22
Finally!!
I Thought this book was awesome! A raw, tell it how it is being in midlife! This book came to me at a time that was needed! Funny & relatable. Love the humor!
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- Amazon Customer
- 03-23-23
Nailed it
Finished in 2 days. Highly recommend for anyone 40+!!
Absolutely hilarious, with a generous sprinkle of truth bombs and f-bombs, mixed with some solid advice. Jen says EVERYTHING us middle aged women are thinking. Every thought I harbor and bite my tongue through is in this gem.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ 5 stars
Anyone taking issue with the language… are you even Gen X?!
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2 people found this helpful