
Why We Can't Sleep
Women's New Midlife Crisis
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Narrated by:
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Ada Calhoun
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By:
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Ada Calhoun
About this listen
A generation-defining examination of the new midlife crisis facing Gen X women and the unique circumstances that have brought them to this point, Why We Can’t Sleep is a lively successor to Passages by Gail Sheehy and The Defining Decade by Meg Jay.
When Ada Calhoun found herself in the throes of a midlife crisis, she thought that she had no right to complain. She was married with children and a good career. So why did she feel miserable? And why did it seem that other Generation X women were miserable, too?
Calhoun decided to find some answers. She looked into housing costs, HR trends, credit card debt averages, and divorce data. At every turn, she saw a pattern: sandwiched between the Boomers and Millennials, Gen X women were facing new problems as they entered middle age, problems that were being largely overlooked.
Speaking with women across America about their experiences as the generation expected to “have it all”, Calhoun found that most were exhausted, terrified about money, under-employed, and overwhelmed. Instead of their issues being heard, they were told to lean in, take “me time”, or make a chore chart to get their lives and homes in order.
In Why We Can’t Sleep, Calhoun opens up the cultural and political contexts of Gen X’s predicament and offers solutions for how to pull oneself out of the abyss - and keep the next generation from falling in. The result is reassuring, empowering, and essential listening for all middle-aged women, and anyone who hopes to understand them.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2019 Ada Calhoun (P)2019 Audible, Inc.Listeners also enjoyed...
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Go Behind the Scenes of Why We Can't Sleep

Editor's Pick
Here we are now, validate us
"Being "seen" is a decidedly Gen Z and millennial aspiration, but even us aging Gen-Xers—famously misanthropic, pessimistic, and nonconformist—have a primal need for acknowledgement. As a 45-year-old mother of two, child of divorced parents (one of whom is of failing health), I felt 100% #seen by Ada Calhoun’s glorious paean to the plight of the modern middle-aged woman. Informed by her extremely viral article for O magazine ("The New Midlife Crisis"), Why We Can’t Sleep is sensitively reported, exhaustively researched, and full of so-funny-because-it’s-so-painfully-true moments. If you feel the full weight of the mental load of parenting up, down, and sideways, I promise you’ll feel validated by Calhoun’s message." —Courtney R., Audible Editor
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- Master the Skills You Need to Lead - in Just Minutes a Day
- By: Martin Lanik
- Narrated by: Timothy Andrés Pabon
- Length: 6 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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In leadership as in life, only practice makes perfect. Habits are powerful. They can lock us into negative behaviors (like snacking and smoking) or train us to act automatically in ways that benefit us (such as putting on a seat belt). Routines quietly undergird large portions of what we do and how we function. Habit formation can speed success in the workplace as well - even in complex areas like leadership. The Leader Habit spotlights 22 essential leadership abilities, breaking them down into a series of small, learnable behaviors.
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well organized
- By Eniw Trop on 08-21-18
By: Martin Lanik
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The Myth of the Framework
- In Defence of Science and Rationality
- By: Karl Popper
- Narrated by: Martyn Swain
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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In a career spanning 60 years, Sir Karl Popper has made some of the most important contributions to the 20th century discussion of science and rationality. The Myth of the Framework is a collection of some of Popper's most important material on this subject.
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wonderful ideas clearly stated, so-so reading
- By A structural engineer on 04-04-23
By: Karl Popper
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The Road to Better Habits, Updated and Expanded
- A Simple Framework for Transforming Your Habits
- By: Darius Foroux
- Narrated by: Darius Foroux
- Length: 2 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Covid-19 has changed our habits whether we like to admit it or not. We've become more distracted than ever, which is impacting every aspect of our lives. In this updated and expanded version of The Road to Better Habits, you’ll learn how to transform your habits in a simple way. Ultimately, where you are in your life is a result of your habits. The American historian and philosopher, Will Durant, said it best: "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”
By: Darius Foroux
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Father to Son
- Life Lessons on Raising a Boy
- By: Harry H. Harrison Jr.
- Narrated by: Stephen R. Thorne
- Length: 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Warm and fuzzy, anchored in values, and filled with simple words of wisdom, this beloved, best-selling book for parents speaks to the important business of raising sons, and distills their timeless lessons into nuggets of wisdom - some lighthearted, some serious, some practical, and some intangible, and all supported by a strong moral backbone.
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List of What to do, not Why or principles behind it
- By Ben on 02-15-25
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How Luck Happens
- Using the Science of Luck to Transform Work, Love, and Life
- By: Janice Kaplan, Barnaby Marsh
- Narrated by: Janice Kaplan
- Length: 9 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Janice Kaplan is back to tackle another big, mysterious influence in all our lives: luck. And this time she's joined on her journey by coauthor Dr. Barnaby Marsh, a renowned academic who guides her exploration. Together they uncover the unexpected, little-understood science behind what we call "luck", proving that many seemingly random events are actually under your - and everyone's - control. They examine the factors that made stars like Harrison Ford and Jonathan Groff so successful, and learn the real secrets that made Kate Spade and Warby Parker into global brands.
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Despite the title, not science-based
- By julia ritchie on 05-08-18
By: Janice Kaplan, and others
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Mind Hacking
- How to Change Your Mind for Good in 21 Days
- By: Sir John Hargrave
- Narrated by: Sir John Hargrave
- Length: 12 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Have you ever wished you could reprogram your brain, just as a hacker would a computer? In this three-step guide to improving your mental habits, learn to take charge of your mind and banish negative thoughts, habits, and anxiety - in just 21 days!
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Its too slow and feels like it just doesnt get to the point
- By T. Ward on 06-15-17
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Becoming Better Grownups
- Rediscovering What Matters and Remembering How to Fly
- By: Brad Montague
- Narrated by: Brad Montague
- Length: 5 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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When his first book tour ended, Brad Montague missed hearing other people's stories so much that he launched what he dubbed a Listening Tour. First visiting elementary schools and later also nursing homes and retirement communities, he hoped to glean new wisdom as to how he might become a better grownup. Now, in this playful and buoyant book, he shares those insights with rest of us - timeless, often surprising lessons that bypass the head we're always stuck in, and go straight to the heart we sometimes forget.
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Splendid & Remarkable
- By Sheila A. on 04-06-20
By: Brad Montague
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Kaizen
- The Japanese Secret to Lasting Change; Small Steps to Big Goals
- By: Sarah Harvey
- Narrated by: Shiromi Arserio
- Length: 5 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Lifestyle changes can be overwhelming: It’s hard to take on major goals without falling prey to self-doubt. But with kaizen, big goals become small, approachable steps. This Japanese method first made waves in the business world by launching Toyota to success; it also adds magic to Marie Kondo’s life-changing method of tidying up. As Kondo puts it: “You can take the first small step toward your dream today, and keep taking small steps to grow your passions.” Now, Sarah Harvey unlocks kaizen’s amazing potential to enhance our everyday lives.
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Reiteration of other peoples thoughts
- By MJ Quay on 05-03-20
By: Sarah Harvey
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Your Time to Thrive
- End Burnout, Increase Well-Being, and Unlock Your Full Potential with the New Science of Microsteps
- By: Marina Khidekel
- Narrated by: Arianna Huffington, Brina Palencia
- Length: 5 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Eschewing trendy self-care fixes or the latest health fads, Your Time to Thrive is the revolutionary guide to living and working based on microsteps - tiny science-backed changes. By making them too small to fail, we can incorporate them into our daily lives right away and begin building healthier ways of living and working. Your Time to Thrive shares practical, usable, research-supported mini-habits that will yield huge benefits and empower people to truly thrive in all parts of their lives.
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Excellent Service Journalism and Advice
- By Christina on 05-17-21
By: Marina Khidekel
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The Upside of Uncertainty
- A Guide to Finding Possibility in the Unknown
- By: Nathan Furr, Susannah Harmon Furr
- Narrated by: Dina Pearlman
- Length: 11 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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In The Upside of Uncertainty, INSEAD professor Nathan Furr and entrepreneur Susannah Harmon Furr provide a sweeping guide to embracing uncertainty and transforming it into a force for good. Drawing from hundreds of interviews, along with pioneering research in psychology, innovation, and behavioral economics, Nathan and Susannah provide dozens of tools—including mental models, techniques, and reflections—for seeing the upside of uncertainty, developing a vision for what to do next, and opening ourselves up to new possibilities.
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Real World Usable Advice
- By Nathan & Kira Huggins on 02-23-24
By: Nathan Furr, and others
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No Hard Feelings
- Owning Intense Emotions (Before They Own You)
- By: Liz Fosslien, Mollie West Duffy
- Narrated by: Liz Fosslien, Mollie West Duffy
- Length: 4 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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The modern workplace can be an emotional minefield, filled with confusing power structures and unwritten rules. We're expected to be authentic, but not too authentic. Professional, but not stiff. Friendly, but not an oversharer. Easier said than done! Our goal in this book is to teach you how to figure out which emotions to toss, which to keep to yourself, and which to express in order to be both happier and more effective.
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Maybe not the best for audible...
- By Rebecca Wilcox on 08-01-19
By: Liz Fosslien, and others
For accuracy the arm of the hormone trial that was stopped was the “progestin” not “progesterone” arm.
Validating
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Interesting perspective for Gen X Women
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Exactly what I needed
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Both informative and comforting
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I read a review prior to purchasing this book that indicated it had political leanings against the president. I have read many books with political leanings and this book is not one of them. The author is discussing anxiety, social media and polarization. This portion of the book lasts 60 seconds.
Loved this book!
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this genx woman loved this book
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Exactly what I needed
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GenX Women Mid-Life Crisis is Real
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More Anxiety but Less Alone
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Speaking directly to me
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