
The Disengaged Teen
Helping Kids Learn Better, Feel Better, and Live Better
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Narrated by:
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Jenny Anderson
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Rebecca Winthrop
About this listen
“Our education systems are shortchanging far too many teenagers. This book is brimming with insights on how to change that. It’s an engaging, evidence-based, and practical read about how to develop a generation of lifelong learners.”—Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Hidden Potential and Think Again, and host of the podcast Re:Thinking
A powerful toolkit for parents of both checked-out and stressed-out teens that shows exactly what to do (and stop doing) to support their academic and emotional flourishing.
Adolescents are hardwired to explore and grow, and learning is mainly how they do this. But a shocking majority of teens are disengaged from school, simultaneously bored and overwhelmed. This is feeding an alarming teen mental health crisis. As kids get older and more independent, parents often feel powerless to help. But fear not, there are evidence-backed strategies to guide them from disengagement to drive, in and out of school.
For the past five years, award-winning journalist Jenny Anderson and the Brookings Institution’s global education expert Rebecca Winthrop have been investigating why so many children lose their love of learning in adolescence. Now, weaving extensive original research with real-world stories of kids who transformed their relationships with learning, they identify four modes of learning that students use to navigate through the shifting academic demands and social dynamics of middle and high school, shaping the internal narratives about their skills, potential, and identity:
• Resister. When kids resist, they struggle silently with profound feelings of inadequacy or invisibility, which they communicate by ignoring homework, playing sick, skipping class, or acting out.
• Passenger. When kids coast along, consistently doing the bare minimum and complaining that classes are pointless. They need help connecting school to their skills, interests, or learning needs.
• Achiever. When kids show up, do the work, and get consistently high grades, their self-worth can become tied to high performance. Their disengagement is invisible, fueling a fear of failure and putting them at risk for mental health challenges.
• Explorer. When kids are driven by internal curiosity rather than just external expectations, they investigate the questions they care about and persist to achieve their goals.
Understanding your child’s learning modes is vital for nurturing their ability to become Explorers. Anderson and Winthrop outline simple yet counterintuitive parenting strategies for connecting with your child, tailoring your listening and communication styles to their needs, igniting their curiosity, and building self-awareness and emotional regulation.
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Critic reviews
“Every parent of a checked out, overwhelmed, or frustrated middle or high-school student needs to read this book.”—Charles Duhigg, author of The Power of Habit and Smarter Faster Better
“Our education systems are shortchanging far too many teenagers. This book is brimming with insights on how to change that. It’s an engaging, evidence-based, and practical read about how to develop a generation of lifelong learners.”—Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Hidden Potential and Think Again, and host of the podcast Re:Thinking
“[The Disengaged Teen] is an empathetic look at how modern teens get lost and a practical guide to helping them get found.”—Scott Galloway, Professor of Marketing, NYU Stern, Host of the Prof G Pod and Cohost of the Pivot Podcast
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Story
No parent experienced their teen years the way that children do today. This guide provides strategies and tips for actively learning the world of our children.
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Every parent should read this!!
- By Kitty Kitty on 10-20-19
By: Dr. John Duffy
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Never Enough
- When Achievement Culture Becomes Toxic—and What We Can Do About It
- By: Jennifer Breheny Wallace
- Narrated by: Jennifer Breheny Wallace
- Length: 8 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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In the ever more competitive race to secure the best possible future, today’s students face unprecedented pressure to succeed. They jam-pack their schedules with AP classes, fill every waking hour with resume-padding activities, and even sabotage relationships with friends to “get ahead.” Family incomes and schedules are stretched to the breaking point by tutoring fees and athletic schedules. Yet this drive to optimize performance has only resulted in skyrocketing rates of anxiety, depression, and even self-harm in America’s highest achieving schools.
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If you live or work in one of these communities, you will see yourself
- By Paula on 09-04-23
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Democracy and Education
- An Introduction to the Philosophy of Education
- By: John Dewey
- Narrated by: Rodney Louis Tompkins
- Length: 19 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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In Democracy and Education: An Introduction to the Philosophy of Education (1916), John Dewey contends that the primary facts of the birth and death of each of the members of a social group determine the necessity of education. Dewey viewed the mind and its formation as a communal process, so that the individual is a meaningful concept only when regarded as an inextricable part of their society, whilst the society has no meaning apart from its realization through the lives of individual members.
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terrible narration
- By Jan Goericke on 08-08-20
By: John Dewey
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Middle School Matters
- The 10 Key Skills Kids Need to Thrive in Middle School and Beyond - and How Parents Can Help
- By: Phyllis L. Fagell
- Narrated by: Lauren McCullough
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Middle school is its own important, distinct territory, and yet it's either written off as an uncomfortable rite of passage or lumped in with other developmental phases. Based on her many years working in schools, professional counselor Phyllis Fagell sees these years instead as a critical stage that parents can't afford to ignore (and though "middle school" includes different grades in various regions, Fagell maintains that the ages make more of a difference than the setting).
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So practical
- By Melissa Maldonado on 07-03-25
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What Do You Say?
- How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home
- By: William Stixrud PhD, Ned Johnson
- Narrated by: Ned Johnson
- Length: 8 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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William Stixrud, PhD, and Ned Johnson have 60 years combined experience talking to kids one-on-one, and the most common question they get when out speaking to parents and educators is: What do you say? While many adults understand the importance and power of the philosophies behind the books that dominate the parenting bestseller list, parents are often left wondering how to put those concepts into action. Johnson and Stixrud show how to engage in respectful and effective dialogue, beginning with defining and demonstrating the basic principles of listening and speaking.
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Actionable Advice
- By elizabeth m holladay on 05-19-24
By: William Stixrud PhD, and others
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Light Up the Learning Brain
- 7 Keys to Reducing Disruptive Behavior in the Classroom
- By: Jessica Sinarski
- Narrated by: Jessica Sinarski
- Length: 4 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you ready to increase learning opportunities, reduce negative behaviors, and improve staff and student morale? Then it's time to become a brain builder! We all are aware of an alarming increase in reported behavioral disruptions in school settings. Often less understood is the critical role that the brain plays in shaping all behavior, including the challenges we face in our classrooms and beyond.
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Finally, something that actually helps my class!
- By Bekah on 01-06-25
By: Jessica Sinarski
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The 5 Principles of Parenting
- Your Essential Guide to Raising Good Humans
- By: Aliza Pressman
- Narrated by: Aliza Pressman
- Length: 11 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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In the age of high-pressure parenting, when so many of us we feel like we’ve got to get everything exactly right the first time, Dr. Aliza Pressman is the compassionate, reassuring expert we all need—and the one whose advice we can all use. Already beloved by listeners of hit podcast, Raising Good Humans, Dr. Pressman distills it all with a handful of strategies every parent can use to get things right often enough: Relationship, Reflection, Regulation, Rules, and Repair.
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Good tools to use to prepare my mindset
- By A Smith on 03-15-24
By: Aliza Pressman
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A World After Liberalism
- Philosophers of the Radical Right
- By: Matthew Rose
- Narrated by: Jeff Harding
- Length: 5 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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In this eye-opening book, Matthew Rose introduces us to one of the most controversial intellectual movements of the 20th century, the "radical right", and discusses its adherents' different attempts to imagine political societies after the death or decline of liberalism. Questioning democracy's most basic norms and practices, these critics rejected ideas about human equality, minority rights, religious toleration, and cultural pluralism not out of implicit biases, but out of explicit principle.
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Essential Reading for understanding the Far Right
- By BWA on 08-18-21
By: Matthew Rose
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Boundaries with Teens
- When to Say Yes, How to Say No
- By: John Townsend
- Narrated by: Jay Charles
- Length: 8 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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From best-selling author and counselor Dr. John Townsend, Boundaries with Teens is the expert insight and guidance you need to help your teens take responsibility for their actions, attitudes, and emotions and gain a deeper appreciation and respect both for you and for themselves.
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Got Teens?
- By Raymond on 08-11-06
By: John Townsend
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The Language of God
- A Scientist Presents Evidence for Belief
- By: Francis S. Collins
- Narrated by: Francis S. Collins
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Dr. Francis Collins, head of the Human Genome Project, is one of the world's leading scientists, yet he is also a man of unshakable faith in God and scripture. Dr. Collins has resolved the dilemma that haunts everyone who believes in God and respects science. Faith in God and faith in science can be harmonious, not separately but together, combined into one worldview. For Collins, science does not conflict with the Bible, science enhances it.
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For those on the fence
- By Stephen on 10-07-06
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Untethered
- Creating Connected Families, Schools, and Communities to Raise a Resilient Generation
- By: Doug Bolton PhD
- Narrated by: Doug Bolton Ph.D.
- Length: 8 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Over the past decade, children’s mental health challenges have reached epidemic levels—stress, anxiety, childhood depression, and suicide are at unprecedented high rates. Amid high-stakes pressure for kids to succeed, parents and teachers have never needed a road map to healthy child development more urgently. And as psychologist and educator Doug Bolton explains in this eye-opening guide, underlying our modern-day stresses is an even more pervasive problem: We’re relying on practices that are not in line with what science tells us about how to truly motivate children and help them thrive.
By: Doug Bolton PhD
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This Is So Awkward
- Modern Puberty Explained
- By: Cara Natterson MD, Vanessa Kroll Bennett
- Narrated by: Cara Natterson MD, Vanessa Kroll Bennett
- Length: 13 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Almost everything about puberty has changed since today's adults went through it. Bewildered adults have begged for reliable and relatable information about the modern adolescent experience. This Is So Awkward answers their call. Written by a pediatrician and a puberty educator—together the hosts of a lively and popular podcast on puberty, and moms to six teens between them—this is the handbook everyone has been searching for. Eye-opening and reassuring, This Is So Awkward will help adults understand the turbulent pubescent decade and become confident guides for today’s kids.
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Text book reading for understanding your kids
- By Leap4 on 09-23-24
By: Cara Natterson MD, and others
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Boys Adrift
- The Five Factors Driving the Growing Epidemic of Unmotivated Boys and Underachieving Young Men
- By: Leonard Sax
- Narrated by: Allan Robertson
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Why America's sons are underachieving, and what we can do about it. Something is happening to boys today. From kindergarten to college, American boys are, on average, less resilient and less ambitious than they were a mere 20 years ago. The gender gap in college attendance and graduation rates has widened dramatically. In Boys Adrift, Dr. Leonard Sax delves into the scientific literature and draws on more than 20 years of clinical experience to explain why boys and young men are failing in school and disengaged at home.
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Profound
- By Sunny Blaine on 12-03-17
By: Leonard Sax
Hard conversations made easier!
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