Preview
  • BIFF

  • Quick Responses to High-Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns
  • By: Bill Eddy
  • Narrated by: Scott R. Pollak
  • Length: 3 hrs and 55 mins
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars (2 ratings)

Prime logo Prime members: New to Audible?
Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
Pick 1 audiobook a month from our unmatched collection.
Listen all you want to thousands of included audiobooks, Originals, and podcasts.
Access exclusive sales and deals.
Premium Plus auto-renews for $14.95/mo after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

BIFF

By: Bill Eddy
Narrated by: Scott R. Pollak
Try for $0.00

$14.95/month after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

Buy for $16.00

Buy for $16.00

Pay using card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and Amazon's Privacy Notice. Taxes where applicable.

Publisher's summary

We live in an age of rapid change and instant communication. We also live in a culture of blame and disrespect...

Has anyone ever told you:

  • “It’s all your fault!”
  • “You should be ashamed of yourself!”
  • “You’re a disgrace to your [family][community][country][team][profession][party][you fill in the blank]
  • “What’s the matter with you? Are you crazy? Stupid? Immoral? Unethical? Evil?”

And then were you told everything that’s “wrong” with you and how you should behave?

It’s not about you!

Let’s face it. Most of us have said something like this when we “lost it”—hopefully not too often. But some people communicate this way a lot! It’s helpful to know that their personal attacks are not about you. They are about the blamer’s inability to control himself and solve problems.

When people repeatedly use personal attacks, I think of them as “high-conflict people” (HCPs), because they lack skills for dealing well with conflict. Instead of sharing responsibility for solving problems, they repeatedly lose it and increase conflict by making it intensely personal and taking no responsibility. They are the most difficult people, because they are preoccupied with blaming others—what I call their “targets of blame”—which may include you! They speak Blamespeak: attack, defend—and attack again.

I wrote this book to help you respond to anyone who tries to engage you with hostile emails, texts, Facebook postings, vicious rumors, or just plain difficult behavior. But before I explain how to write a BIFF response, I want to give you a brief understanding of how HCPs think.

This audiobook was produced and published by Echo Point Books & Media, an independent bookseller in Brattleboro, Vermont.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2011 Bill Eddy (P)2024 Echo Point Books & Media, LLC
activate_Holiday_promo_in_buybox_DT_T2

What listeners say about BIFF

Average customer ratings
Overall
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    1
  • 4 Stars
    1
  • 3 Stars
    0
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0
Performance
  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    2
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    0
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0
Story
  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    1
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    1
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

practical, wise, on point, life saving

Gives a sensible blueprint for how and why to respond to highly contentious people remarks, actions, attacks.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars

It gives you exactly what you can expect from the title

I like that is short, but still develops a couple of ideas and give you examples. Most of these type of books are 100 pages longer that the should be, not this one

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!