
Headpats After Dark
A cozy yandere romcom for men who like crazy vampire women
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
$0.99/mo for the first 3 months

Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
Buy for $33.90
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Raya Kane
-
Richard Brock
-
By:
-
Virgil Knightley
About this listen
She's the most beautiful woman he's ever met. She's also his archnemesis.
It would be an understatement to call Trevon Beaumont an accomplished monster slayer. He's traversed the European countryside upholding the legacy of his clan one completed mission at a time for the whole of his adult life. Now he's on his most perilous quest yet: slay the cruel but beautiful Countess Dracula.
Just as the two of them seem ready to conclude their final battle, however, an unexpected act of betrayal sends them hurtling together through time—bloodbonding them, thus entwining their fates. Reappearing in the twenty-first century, they must get jobs and find a place to stay while they decide how best to proceed now that they are unable to continue their battle to the death.
But when Dracula rapidly develops a romantic obsession for Trevon, things get complicated. Even worse, Trevon's forced proximity to the queen of all creatures of the night means that his own self-control is constantly tested. What will become of their budding relationship? Will it be hot?
Headpats After Dark is a wholesome yandere romantic comedy written for men who enjoy the trope of obsessive women with a few screws loose. This is a work of fiction. If your significant other acts like Dracula does in this novel, those are red flags, people. Take heed.
©2023 Virgil Knightley (P)2023 Royal Guard Publishing LLCListeners also enjoyed...
-
Dungeon Heroes Omnibus: Books 1-6
- A LitRPG Progression Fantasy
- By: Shane Hammond, Marcus Sloss
- Narrated by: Richard Brock, Raya Kane
- Length: 73 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
I’ve always wanted to conquer the Big 5 dungeons ever since one of them took the life of my father nearly fifteen years ago. Nobody ever said the Path of Progression was easy, but my burning desire to dive can’t be quenched. I just never thought I’d be prohibited from getting a diving license just because I tried to help a bratty blonde girl get hers. Soon, we’re joined by a lovely brunette bookworm, and we start diving the dungeon on our own terms.
-
-
shallow
- By no one on 03-25-25
By: Shane Hammond, and others
-
Backyard Goblins
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters, Mandy McCullough
- Length: 7 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When a trio of cute goblins emerged from a silver portal that appeared out of nowhere on my property...things got a bit more complicated all of a sudden. Also, I soon discovered they bite and scratch: mostly each other, but sometimes me.
-
-
Historically inaccurate!
- By Jay on 11-09-23
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Our Own Way
- A Slice of Life Men's Romance
- By: Misty Vixen
- Narrated by: Melanie Hastings
- Length: 12 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Life sucks. Gabe Harris has been clued into this fact for a long time now. In his mid-twenties, life has been nothing but low paying jobs, petty power-tripping bosses, and the worst roommates mankind has to offer. Bills, debt, and misery have haunted him for his entire adult life and, to make matters worse, it feels like his dream of being a writer is dead on arrival. One fateful night, he decides to take control of his life and make his dream a reality.
-
-
loving
- By Mark on 09-02-23
By: Misty Vixen
-
Aftermath Falls: The Complete Trilogy
- An Apocalyptic Survival Adventure Omnibus
- By: Lara X. Lust
- Narrated by: Christopher Harbour, Mandy McCullough
- Length: 17 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
James was no one special until he became an overnight millionaire. With his financial worries gone, he sets his eyes on a local waitress named Beth in hopes to explore a possible relationship. Then the world changed forever. After James narrowly escapes death, he takes refuge in his mountainside mansion with Beth and her attractive friend Claire. With fallout destroying the weather system and people going insane from an unknown neurotoxin, the world is more dangerous than it ever has been.
-
-
Not what I was expecting
- By T H on 06-19-24
By: Lara X. Lust
-
Dark Lord of the Farmstead
- A High Fantasy Slice-of-Life LitRPG
- By: John Broadway
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters, Jessica Threet
- Length: 11 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Isekaied into a level 86 Necromancer-King's body, I leave his life of war behind in favor of peace in the idyllic Borderlands. Upon meeting the elven maiden Narya Summerdew and a razor-toothed half-elven child, the three of us form an unlikely improvised family in the hopes of remaining anonymous. As we embrace the eccentric community of Gelderham, we find happiness in simplicity…But my past casts shadows on our growing bonds. How will Narya react when she learns her new husband was once the evil king set on destroying her people?
-
-
It was wonderful.
- By Cole on 10-03-23
By: John Broadway
-
Haven: The Complete Series
- A Post-Apocalyptic Men's Adventure
- By: Misty Vixen
- Narrated by: Ellory Lane
- Length: 55 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It was supposed to be a medical marvel. Instead, it triggered the apocalypse. Half of humanity mutated into mindless zombies. Half the survivors mutated into the inhumans: various new species of people with new appearances and abilities. Some grew scales, some grew fur, some could fly, some could survive only underwater. Decades passed, and from the ashes of the old world, a new patchwork civilization rose. Humans and inhumans lived in tentative peace, and the zombies turned out to be not much of a threat once a few generations of survivors had come and gone.
-
-
average
- By Dragonmother on 04-16-24
By: Misty Vixen
-
Dungeon Heroes Omnibus: Books 1-6
- A LitRPG Progression Fantasy
- By: Shane Hammond, Marcus Sloss
- Narrated by: Richard Brock, Raya Kane
- Length: 73 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
I’ve always wanted to conquer the Big 5 dungeons ever since one of them took the life of my father nearly fifteen years ago. Nobody ever said the Path of Progression was easy, but my burning desire to dive can’t be quenched. I just never thought I’d be prohibited from getting a diving license just because I tried to help a bratty blonde girl get hers. Soon, we’re joined by a lovely brunette bookworm, and we start diving the dungeon on our own terms.
-
-
shallow
- By no one on 03-25-25
By: Shane Hammond, and others
-
Backyard Goblins
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters, Mandy McCullough
- Length: 7 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When a trio of cute goblins emerged from a silver portal that appeared out of nowhere on my property...things got a bit more complicated all of a sudden. Also, I soon discovered they bite and scratch: mostly each other, but sometimes me.
-
-
Historically inaccurate!
- By Jay on 11-09-23
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Our Own Way
- A Slice of Life Men's Romance
- By: Misty Vixen
- Narrated by: Melanie Hastings
- Length: 12 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Life sucks. Gabe Harris has been clued into this fact for a long time now. In his mid-twenties, life has been nothing but low paying jobs, petty power-tripping bosses, and the worst roommates mankind has to offer. Bills, debt, and misery have haunted him for his entire adult life and, to make matters worse, it feels like his dream of being a writer is dead on arrival. One fateful night, he decides to take control of his life and make his dream a reality.
-
-
loving
- By Mark on 09-02-23
By: Misty Vixen
-
Aftermath Falls: The Complete Trilogy
- An Apocalyptic Survival Adventure Omnibus
- By: Lara X. Lust
- Narrated by: Christopher Harbour, Mandy McCullough
- Length: 17 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
James was no one special until he became an overnight millionaire. With his financial worries gone, he sets his eyes on a local waitress named Beth in hopes to explore a possible relationship. Then the world changed forever. After James narrowly escapes death, he takes refuge in his mountainside mansion with Beth and her attractive friend Claire. With fallout destroying the weather system and people going insane from an unknown neurotoxin, the world is more dangerous than it ever has been.
-
-
Not what I was expecting
- By T H on 06-19-24
By: Lara X. Lust
-
Dark Lord of the Farmstead
- A High Fantasy Slice-of-Life LitRPG
- By: John Broadway
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters, Jessica Threet
- Length: 11 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Isekaied into a level 86 Necromancer-King's body, I leave his life of war behind in favor of peace in the idyllic Borderlands. Upon meeting the elven maiden Narya Summerdew and a razor-toothed half-elven child, the three of us form an unlikely improvised family in the hopes of remaining anonymous. As we embrace the eccentric community of Gelderham, we find happiness in simplicity…But my past casts shadows on our growing bonds. How will Narya react when she learns her new husband was once the evil king set on destroying her people?
-
-
It was wonderful.
- By Cole on 10-03-23
By: John Broadway
-
Haven: The Complete Series
- A Post-Apocalyptic Men's Adventure
- By: Misty Vixen
- Narrated by: Ellory Lane
- Length: 55 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It was supposed to be a medical marvel. Instead, it triggered the apocalypse. Half of humanity mutated into mindless zombies. Half the survivors mutated into the inhumans: various new species of people with new appearances and abilities. Some grew scales, some grew fur, some could fly, some could survive only underwater. Decades passed, and from the ashes of the old world, a new patchwork civilization rose. Humans and inhumans lived in tentative peace, and the zombies turned out to be not much of a threat once a few generations of survivors had come and gone.
-
-
average
- By Dragonmother on 04-16-24
By: Misty Vixen
-
Corsairs and Cataclysms 1
- A Darkwyrlds Tale (Corsairs & Cataclysms, Book 1)
- By: Devan Drake
- Narrated by: Tom North, Faye Bishop
- Length: 20 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
An experimental ASI with a terminal case of curiosity reached out and tampered with the universe in a way that it should not have, and unleashed a torrent of energy we would call magic into our galaxy. Humans, and every other intelligent lifeform for that matter, were ill-prepared, physically and mentally, for such an eventuality. In an effort to save itself, the ASI hastily created something it called the Framework to shape and codify this magical energy, and usher in a new world. A world of classes, levels, and extraordinary power. But also a world of monsters.
-
-
Wish I could return
- By Donald on 11-19-23
By: Devan Drake
-
Esoterica: The Omnibus
- The Lovecraftian Saga
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Bruno Anderson, Peggy Greyson
- Length: 29 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
I'd known my fair share of tragedy in the last year. Lost my family, abandoned by my friends... things were looking down. Imagine my surprise when I get ripped out of my own reality and forcibly enrolled in a magic school nestled between the seams of the multiverse. My new purpose? Defend all of creation against the Outer Gods and keep from dying at the hands of the Void Things. But there's something nefarious about my headmistress... something I don't trust. At least I'm not alone anymore.
-
-
Who would rate this 5 star?
- By Jeremy Burklow on 12-30-23
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Tower Mage Omnibus
- A LitRPG Isekai Fantasy
- By: David Burke
- Narrated by: Daniel Wisniewski, Rebecca Woods
- Length: 29 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Rico hungered for something more, eager for excitement. Fate led him to a goddess of opportunity. The divine teleports him to a planet filled with war, magic, and denizens of the deep. Life... it has a way of smacking you in the face, eliciting that fight of flight emotion buried deep within. For Rico, he embraces the challenge, being blessed as a mage of the nine magics; a protector of the nine species. By crushing his enemies to gain riches and levels, he'll protect the downtrodden as a destined champion.
-
-
Not his best work
- By Amazon Customer on 02-10-24
By: David Burke
-
Aether's Blessing
- Aether's Revival, Book 1
- By: Daniel Schinhofen
- Narrated by: Andrea Parsneau
- Length: 17 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Every year, the empire administers the rite of passage into adulthood. That rite serves to identify those blessed by Aether to become magi. The new magi are shipped to the academy to learn the arts of magic. The academy is a dangerous place; the tournaments held twice each year can cripple or kill the students, and the clans of the empire will go to great lengths to recruit the students they want. Gregory had one dream: to become a magi like the legends of old. Though he was ridiculed by the residents of the village and his unsupportive father, he never wavered from his dream.
-
-
whoa
- By Benjamin on 08-31-20
-
The Seventh Princess
- A Reincarnation Progression Fantasy
- By: D.C. Haenlien
- Narrated by: Diana Richardson, Blaine Maddox
- Length: 12 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
A soul from Earth awakens as Seventh Princess Adelheid of the Vuldar Empire. With a weak body but a monstrous reservoir of mana that threatens her very life, Adelheid engraves an oath into her very soul. She shall seize the throne at all costs, but with ambitious cousins and discontent nobles, her father and brother are far from her only rivals. Experience Adelheid's journey through victory and loss to achieve her deepest desires.
-
-
Not worth the credit
- By Kevin Varela on 10-18-22
By: D.C. Haenlien
-
Solar Dragons Need Love, Too! The Catch-Up Omnibus, Books 1-6
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Alyssa Poon
- Length: 55 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Taken from my old life with little memory of what brought me here, I wake up in a high tech capsule. A wrinkly old elf tells me that my soul is incomplete and has been fused with that of a Solar Dragon to give me a second chance at life. Where? When? An urban metropolis filled with fantasy races, erected atop the back of a giant asteroid. Meteoropolis. And millions of years in the future, to boot. But that's not all. I've got super powers, too. To add to the excitement, I end up hosted by an anxious unicorn elf named Pinky Peach who is basically a professional gamer girl.
-
-
Dumb Batman
- By Zack on 07-25-24
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Journey of a Betrayed Hero Publisher's Pack
- Books 1 and 2
- By: Brandon Varnell
- Narrated by: Renée Nolen, Alfie Syme
- Length: 16 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
After being betrayed by the very kingdom he saved, Jacob Stone forsook his title of Hero. Now he lives the simple life of a barkeep. Yet even that life is irrevocably erased when a young woman named Enyo appears before him. She claims to be the daughter of the former Dark Lord and has come seeking his aid. He’d normally never consider lending her a hand, but when she tells him that she knows of a way for him to return home, he’s left with little recourse.
-
-
Weak world building makes for and unsatisfying story
- By Fantasy Reader on 11-20-24
By: Brandon Varnell
-
Amazon Apocalypse
- By: Marvin Knight
- Narrated by: Jack Douglas, Jessica Threet
- Length: 20 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Growing up, she was the girl down the street. Even then, I knew she was different. She was tough, rough, and had the strength to stop a speeding car with her bare hands. We were as thick as thieves, sharing every adventure. Then one day she revealed a secret. She wasn't from Earth. She was from a distant place called the Arcadia Multiverse. Her people lived under the rule of a god-like entity known as the System. That System had its gaze fixed on Earth. And it was only a matter of time before it came for us.
-
-
Good, but very derivative towards the end
- By Anonymous on 10-28-23
By: Marvin Knight
-
Alpha Warlock Academy
- Alpha Warlock Academy, Book 1
- By: Noah Layton
- Narrated by: Erin Bateman, Matt Hicks
- Length: 11 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
I was just a normal guy making his way in the big city—until I found myself transported to another world to train at the Alpha Warlock Academy. Not only do they want me among their ranks, but they want me to train among the most powerful of warlocks at the Academy. I've got a lot on my plate: cramming spells, training for combat, and trying not to get myself killed during my initial challenges. Fortunately, I've also got plenty of friends to help me out, including my hobgoblin neighbor and the smooth-talking genie across the hall.
-
-
Ok with issues
- By Roy on 01-07-24
By: Noah Layton
-
Nosferatu Academy Omnibus
- The Complete Omnibus: and a Bonus Novel: Thule the Fast Food Barbarian
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Patrick DuBois, Hannah Blaire
- Length: 35 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Barrett Bradshaw was always a bookworm, but no amount of reading would prepare him for his childhood crush turning him into a vampire. Even more absurd, it turns out that he was never fully human at all.
-
-
useless mc,
- By frederik on 08-26-24
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Paladin of the Sword
- By: Marvin Knight
- Narrated by: Jessica Threet
- Length: 14 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The surface world is a strange place for a young man who grew up in hell. Darren was just a boy when he and his mother were betrayed by paladins and chased beneath the Earth. There, with only his paladin's sigil and his quests to guide him, Darren grew from boy to man. Born in fire and blood, hell itself sculpted the perfect paladin.
-
-
Mostly Okay...
- By Roy on 03-03-22
By: Marvin Knight
-
The Reluctant Superhero Book 1
- By: D. Levesque
- Narrated by: Alex Matthews, Kat Riley
- Length: 8 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Randold, better known as Rand, was no ordinary individual. Despite his best efforts, he possessed an extraordinary secret—he was a Super. Well, technically speaking, he belonged to that exceptional group, but he concealed his true nature from the world. For Rand possessed a remarkable ability to manipulate all forms of energy, even the Superpowers of others, a power that, if discovered, would undoubtedly land him in dire trouble with the government. The consequences ranged from imprisonment to something far worse.
-
-
Great book But not just typical work.
- By Irene Trex Queen on 10-26-23
By: D. Levesque
Related to this topic
-
Project Hail Mary
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Ray Porter
- Length: 16 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Ryland Grace is the sole survivor on a desperate, last-chance mission - and if he fails, humanity and the Earth itself will perish. Except that right now, he doesn't know that. He can't even remember his own name, let alone the nature of his assignment or how to complete it. All he knows is that he's been asleep for a very, very long time. And he's just been awakened to find himself millions of miles from home, with nothing but two corpses for company.
-
-
Bazinga
- By Davidgonzalezsr on 05-04-21
By: Andy Weir
-
Hitchhikers
- By: Ben H. Winters
- Narrated by: Therese Plummer
- Length: 3 hrs and 27 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Annie has always had high hopes for her future. But the reality of her life just isn’t measuring up. She loves her fiancé, Greg–doesn’t she? She’s going to get her degree and open her own business–won’t she? Then, a strange old woman shows up outside her house, and she seems to know a lot about Annie. An awful lot. Annie could tell the old woman to get lost. Yet there’s something about her Annie just can’t shake. And what she learns could change her life forever–but is it the life she envisioned?
-
-
The ever present battle between past and future.
- By Kindle Customer on 03-14-25
By: Ben H. Winters
-
Starter Villain
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Inheriting your uncle's supervillain business is more complicated than you might think. Particularly when you discover who's running the place. Charlie's life is going nowhere fast. A divorced substitute teacher living with his cat in a house his siblings want to sell, all he wants is to open a pub downtown, if only the bank will approve his loan. Then his long-lost uncle Jake dies and leaves his supervillain business (complete with island volcano lair) to Charlie. But becoming a supervillain isn't all giant laser death rays and lava pits.
-
-
Volcanic Lairs, Death Rays & Cats… Oh My! 😼
- By C. White on 09-19-23
By: John Scalzi
-
When the Moon Hits Your Eye
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 10 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For some it’s an opportunity. For others it’s a moment to question their faith: In God, in science, in everything. Still others try to keep the world running in the face of absurdity and uncertainty. And then there are the billions looking to the sky and wondering how a thing that was always just there is now... something absolutely impossible.
-
-
Wil Wheaton is torture
- By Amazon Customer on 03-27-25
By: John Scalzi
-
The Martian
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 10 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Six days ago, astronaut Mark Watney became one of the first people to walk on Mars. Now, he's sure he'll be the first person to die there. After a dust storm nearly kills him and forces his crew to evacuate while thinking him dead, Mark finds himself stranded and completely alone with no way to even signal Earth that he’s alive - and even if he could get word out, his supplies would be gone long before a rescue could arrive. But Mark isn't ready to give up yet.
-
-
I love Wil Wheaton but why not R. C. Bray?
- By L. Newman on 01-11-20
By: Andy Weir
-
The Signal
- By: Eric Buchman, Gabriel Urbina, Sarah Shachat
- Narrated by: Paget Brewster, full cast
- Length: 2 hrs and 39 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Two astronomers have detected a strange, pulsing signal from deep space. Within hours, the US government goes into lockdown, restricting airspace and scrubbing scientific data. Was the signal an intercepted communication revealing alarming plans for an enemy’s military strike? Or has humanity at long last found proof of extraterrestrial life?
-
-
it did a good job keep me listening but disappointed at the ending
- By Tristan M. on 12-21-24
By: Eric Buchman, and others
-
Project Hail Mary
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Ray Porter
- Length: 16 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Ryland Grace is the sole survivor on a desperate, last-chance mission - and if he fails, humanity and the Earth itself will perish. Except that right now, he doesn't know that. He can't even remember his own name, let alone the nature of his assignment or how to complete it. All he knows is that he's been asleep for a very, very long time. And he's just been awakened to find himself millions of miles from home, with nothing but two corpses for company.
-
-
Bazinga
- By Davidgonzalezsr on 05-04-21
By: Andy Weir
-
Hitchhikers
- By: Ben H. Winters
- Narrated by: Therese Plummer
- Length: 3 hrs and 27 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Annie has always had high hopes for her future. But the reality of her life just isn’t measuring up. She loves her fiancé, Greg–doesn’t she? She’s going to get her degree and open her own business–won’t she? Then, a strange old woman shows up outside her house, and she seems to know a lot about Annie. An awful lot. Annie could tell the old woman to get lost. Yet there’s something about her Annie just can’t shake. And what she learns could change her life forever–but is it the life she envisioned?
-
-
The ever present battle between past and future.
- By Kindle Customer on 03-14-25
By: Ben H. Winters
-
Starter Villain
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Inheriting your uncle's supervillain business is more complicated than you might think. Particularly when you discover who's running the place. Charlie's life is going nowhere fast. A divorced substitute teacher living with his cat in a house his siblings want to sell, all he wants is to open a pub downtown, if only the bank will approve his loan. Then his long-lost uncle Jake dies and leaves his supervillain business (complete with island volcano lair) to Charlie. But becoming a supervillain isn't all giant laser death rays and lava pits.
-
-
Volcanic Lairs, Death Rays & Cats… Oh My! 😼
- By C. White on 09-19-23
By: John Scalzi
-
When the Moon Hits Your Eye
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 10 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For some it’s an opportunity. For others it’s a moment to question their faith: In God, in science, in everything. Still others try to keep the world running in the face of absurdity and uncertainty. And then there are the billions looking to the sky and wondering how a thing that was always just there is now... something absolutely impossible.
-
-
Wil Wheaton is torture
- By Amazon Customer on 03-27-25
By: John Scalzi
-
The Martian
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 10 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Six days ago, astronaut Mark Watney became one of the first people to walk on Mars. Now, he's sure he'll be the first person to die there. After a dust storm nearly kills him and forces his crew to evacuate while thinking him dead, Mark finds himself stranded and completely alone with no way to even signal Earth that he’s alive - and even if he could get word out, his supplies would be gone long before a rescue could arrive. But Mark isn't ready to give up yet.
-
-
I love Wil Wheaton but why not R. C. Bray?
- By L. Newman on 01-11-20
By: Andy Weir
-
The Signal
- By: Eric Buchman, Gabriel Urbina, Sarah Shachat
- Narrated by: Paget Brewster, full cast
- Length: 2 hrs and 39 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Two astronomers have detected a strange, pulsing signal from deep space. Within hours, the US government goes into lockdown, restricting airspace and scrubbing scientific data. Was the signal an intercepted communication revealing alarming plans for an enemy’s military strike? Or has humanity at long last found proof of extraterrestrial life?
-
-
it did a good job keep me listening but disappointed at the ending
- By Tristan M. on 12-21-24
By: Eric Buchman, and others
People who viewed this also viewed...
-
Monstrous Love: The Complete Trilogy Omnibus
- Monstrous Love
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Raya Kane, Richard Brock
- Length: 23 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It would be an understatement to call Trevon Beaumont an accomplished monster slayer. He's traversed the European countryside upholding the legacy of his clan one completed mission at a time for the whole of his adult life. Now he's on his most perilous quest yet: slay the cruel but beautiful Countess Dracula.
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Coven King 1
- By: Virgil Knightley, Edgar Riggs
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters, Aurora Bliss
- Length: 10 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Logan Morrison always fought for everything he had, but it never was much. Growing up truly alone did that to you. One day, when taking on an extra tutoring gig to help out a cute chick with a quirky name, she ends up bringing him back to her place. Cool, right? Well, the next morning, Logan wakes up in chains and comes to learn that Cherry Cola is one beautiful and unhinged monster girl member out of three in a small Fresco City witch coven. Their plans for him? Servitude.
-
-
CherryCola has got to be my favorite dumb name!
- By Alexander scarlett on 06-14-24
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
-
Esoterica: The Omnibus
- The Lovecraftian Saga
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Bruno Anderson, Peggy Greyson
- Length: 29 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
I'd known my fair share of tragedy in the last year. Lost my family, abandoned by my friends... things were looking down. Imagine my surprise when I get ripped out of my own reality and forcibly enrolled in a magic school nestled between the seams of the multiverse. My new purpose? Defend all of creation against the Outer Gods and keep from dying at the hands of the Void Things. But there's something nefarious about my headmistress... something I don't trust. At least I'm not alone anymore.
-
-
Who would rate this 5 star?
- By Jeremy Burklow on 12-30-23
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Backyard Goblins
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters, Mandy McCullough
- Length: 7 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When a trio of cute goblins emerged from a silver portal that appeared out of nowhere on my property...things got a bit more complicated all of a sudden. Also, I soon discovered they bite and scratch: mostly each other, but sometimes me.
-
-
Historically inaccurate!
- By Jay on 11-09-23
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Solar Dragons Need Love, Too! The Catch-Up Omnibus, Books 1-6
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Alyssa Poon
- Length: 55 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Taken from my old life with little memory of what brought me here, I wake up in a high tech capsule. A wrinkly old elf tells me that my soul is incomplete and has been fused with that of a Solar Dragon to give me a second chance at life. Where? When? An urban metropolis filled with fantasy races, erected atop the back of a giant asteroid. Meteoropolis. And millions of years in the future, to boot. But that's not all. I've got super powers, too. To add to the excitement, I end up hosted by an anxious unicorn elf named Pinky Peach who is basically a professional gamer girl.
-
-
Dumb Batman
- By Zack on 07-25-24
By: Virgil Knightley
-
X-Treme American Dungeon League
- By: Virgil Knightley, Edgar Riggs
- Narrated by: Alyssa Poon, Evan Jordan
- Length: 12 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Garth had been the favorite for the number-one draft pick in the next season of the USA's top sport. His college career was supposed to end on a high note… but it didn't. Sabotaged in his final game, he found himself shut out of the Dungeon League of America, forced to retire his jersey in shame. With no other options, he leaned on his university degree and became a licensed psychiatrist and therapist. That should have been the end of his dungeon-crawling days. But then, a new dungeon appeared in his city.
-
-
Hot and Hilarious
- By CBD on 11-05-24
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
-
Monstrous Love: The Complete Trilogy Omnibus
- Monstrous Love
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Raya Kane, Richard Brock
- Length: 23 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It would be an understatement to call Trevon Beaumont an accomplished monster slayer. He's traversed the European countryside upholding the legacy of his clan one completed mission at a time for the whole of his adult life. Now he's on his most perilous quest yet: slay the cruel but beautiful Countess Dracula.
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Coven King 1
- By: Virgil Knightley, Edgar Riggs
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters, Aurora Bliss
- Length: 10 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Logan Morrison always fought for everything he had, but it never was much. Growing up truly alone did that to you. One day, when taking on an extra tutoring gig to help out a cute chick with a quirky name, she ends up bringing him back to her place. Cool, right? Well, the next morning, Logan wakes up in chains and comes to learn that Cherry Cola is one beautiful and unhinged monster girl member out of three in a small Fresco City witch coven. Their plans for him? Servitude.
-
-
CherryCola has got to be my favorite dumb name!
- By Alexander scarlett on 06-14-24
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
-
Esoterica: The Omnibus
- The Lovecraftian Saga
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Bruno Anderson, Peggy Greyson
- Length: 29 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
I'd known my fair share of tragedy in the last year. Lost my family, abandoned by my friends... things were looking down. Imagine my surprise when I get ripped out of my own reality and forcibly enrolled in a magic school nestled between the seams of the multiverse. My new purpose? Defend all of creation against the Outer Gods and keep from dying at the hands of the Void Things. But there's something nefarious about my headmistress... something I don't trust. At least I'm not alone anymore.
-
-
Who would rate this 5 star?
- By Jeremy Burklow on 12-30-23
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Backyard Goblins
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters, Mandy McCullough
- Length: 7 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When a trio of cute goblins emerged from a silver portal that appeared out of nowhere on my property...things got a bit more complicated all of a sudden. Also, I soon discovered they bite and scratch: mostly each other, but sometimes me.
-
-
Historically inaccurate!
- By Jay on 11-09-23
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Solar Dragons Need Love, Too! The Catch-Up Omnibus, Books 1-6
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Alyssa Poon
- Length: 55 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Taken from my old life with little memory of what brought me here, I wake up in a high tech capsule. A wrinkly old elf tells me that my soul is incomplete and has been fused with that of a Solar Dragon to give me a second chance at life. Where? When? An urban metropolis filled with fantasy races, erected atop the back of a giant asteroid. Meteoropolis. And millions of years in the future, to boot. But that's not all. I've got super powers, too. To add to the excitement, I end up hosted by an anxious unicorn elf named Pinky Peach who is basically a professional gamer girl.
-
-
Dumb Batman
- By Zack on 07-25-24
By: Virgil Knightley
-
X-Treme American Dungeon League
- By: Virgil Knightley, Edgar Riggs
- Narrated by: Alyssa Poon, Evan Jordan
- Length: 12 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Garth had been the favorite for the number-one draft pick in the next season of the USA's top sport. His college career was supposed to end on a high note… but it didn't. Sabotaged in his final game, he found himself shut out of the Dungeon League of America, forced to retire his jersey in shame. With no other options, he leaned on his university degree and became a licensed psychiatrist and therapist. That should have been the end of his dungeon-crawling days. But then, a new dungeon appeared in his city.
-
-
Hot and Hilarious
- By CBD on 11-05-24
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
-
Maid for You
- A Lamia Romance for Men
- By: Virgil Knightley, Peter North
- Narrated by: Raya Kane, Richard Brock
- Length: 10 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Arthur Cain was a hero to his city, the most accomplished and respected of the firefighters in his entire district. But when a call comes in from the so-called "Halfbreed Heights", the monsterfolk part of the city, Arthur's life gets flip-turned upside down.
-
-
Prostitution with extra steps
- By Lostmidwesterner on 09-03-24
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
-
Nosferatu Academy Omnibus
- The Complete Omnibus: and a Bonus Novel: Thule the Fast Food Barbarian
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Patrick DuBois, Hannah Blaire
- Length: 35 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Barrett Bradshaw was always a bookworm, but no amount of reading would prepare him for his childhood crush turning him into a vampire. Even more absurd, it turns out that he was never fully human at all.
-
-
useless mc,
- By frederik on 08-26-24
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Our Own Way
- A Slice of Life Men's Romance
- By: Misty Vixen
- Narrated by: Melanie Hastings
- Length: 12 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Life sucks. Gabe Harris has been clued into this fact for a long time now. In his mid-twenties, life has been nothing but low paying jobs, petty power-tripping bosses, and the worst roommates mankind has to offer. Bills, debt, and misery have haunted him for his entire adult life and, to make matters worse, it feels like his dream of being a writer is dead on arrival. One fateful night, he decides to take control of his life and make his dream a reality.
-
-
loving
- By Mark on 09-02-23
By: Misty Vixen
-
Arcane Arctic
- By: Peter North
- Narrated by: Evan Glasser, Renee Glasser
- Length: 10 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When Jay Morgan and his bestie, Molly O'Brian, take "wrong turn" to a whole new level, they end up sucked into a world that makes the arctic look like a beach vacation. Even worse? After a bump on the head during their trip through the portal, Molly's taking an unplanned nap of potentially eternal proportions, and Jay has no choice but to carry her through a frosty wilderness that gets weirder by the mile.
-
-
Ok...with criticism
- By Roy on 07-22-24
By: Peter North
-
The Last Male Elf: The Complete Omnibus
- By: Virgil Knightley, Alphonse Fisk
- Narrated by: Aurora Bliss, Richard Brock
- Length: 16 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Illemitar Liminelda is the only elf anyone in the human territories of Middenheim has met in quite a while. Sure, there are a few Half-Elves around, but after the last war, even their kind had become a rare sight indeed. But Lemmy, as his friends call him, is pretty well-integrated into the human world. As a seasoned adventurer, raised by humans, he never really questioned his origins all that much.
-
-
Awesome! As per usual.
- By DaynenMc on 08-08-24
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
-
Goblin Girls Do It Better: The Complete Trilogy
- Goblin Girls Do It Better
- By: Misty Vixen
- Narrated by: Ellory Lane
- Length: 19 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Lucas Mead-Slayer has seen it all. Or at least that's what he thought after over a decade of wandering the wilderness of his homeland and embracing everything it had to throw at him. He's fought terrible monsters, plundered ancient catacombs, and caught the eye of many unique and interesting adventuresses. After arguably the most harrowing situation of his life, Lucas has decided to seek out a friend in her home forest, maybe take a vacation, get away from all the craziness. Only it doesn't work out that way.
By: Misty Vixen
-
The First Quest
- Monster Girl Sanctuary
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters, Aurora Bliss
- Length: 16 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Bucky Drake literally just got his managerial position at McDaniel’s, but he’s already been promoted to "Hero" whether or not he's interested in the job. Dragged against his will through a yawning purple vortex by a mouthy catgirl, he finds himself in another world full of vivid colors—and peerless beauties. Cowgirls, lamias, satyresses, unicorns, and even elves of all colors of the rainbow make his acquaintance early and often...and he handles them pretty darn well for a random fast food worker in over his head.
-
-
Just Awesome
- By M M on 03-12-24
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Billy the Barbarian: The Omnibus
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Ellory Lane, Patrick Dubois
- Length: 21 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Billy the Barbarian is an Isekai adventure story about a normal man from our Earth whose destiny changes when he gets snatched up by the gods of a magical world. He then wakes up to find himself in a strange, cruel land known as Thune to the locals. It turns out the gods of Thune have pretty big plans for Billy, and before he knows it he's swept up into an adventure the likes of which you've never seen before.
-
-
A rock star in the stone age.
- By DaynenMc on 02-23-24
By: Virgil Knightley
-
Dead and Horny
- Dangerous Appetites
- By: Annabelle Hawthorne
- Narrated by: Alyssa Poon, Evan Jordan
- Length: 14 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When Dana was killed and resurrected by a necromancer, she didn't know what to expect. She didn't expect to be handed a list of magical items that might cure her if she can find them. She definitely didn't expect the house succubus to come along to service her dangerous needs. And she definitely didn't expect to go head to head with an international organization dedicated to keeping magic out of human hands.
-
-
funny and intriging
- By Tryston Moorman on 08-07-24
-
I Summoned My What?!
- By: Montgomery Quinn
- Narrated by: Raya Kane, Wayne Kelly
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Wanting to go into business with his best friend, Evie, Calon never could have expected how his life would turn in an instant. Rushing into the burning home of a neighbor, the unthinkable happens, and our fearless main character dies a hero. Only...he doesn't quite make it to the afterlife.
-
-
really bad
- By Anonymous User on 04-26-23
By: Montgomery Quinn
-
Elseworlders Bed & Breakfast 1
- By: Virgil Knightley, M.E. Thorne
- Narrated by: Alex Matthews, Renée Nolen
- Length: 10 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
My family has run Sugarville’s one and only B&B for years. Sure, it's a little rundown and the gardens are overgrown, but it’s still got what I like to call rustic charm. If things go my way, it’ll become a cozy shelter for Hellhounds, Alicorns, Kobolds, and more! Yup – I’ve just become the manager of a government-run home for monster girls. Not only will I need to patch the roof, fix the barn, and master my burgeoning magic, but I’ll also need to help our guests adapt to living on Earth!
-
-
I'm laughing so hard
- By Posiden300 on 09-15-24
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
-
Neural Wraith
- Neural Wraith, Book 1
- By: K.D. Robertson
- Narrated by: Stephanie Savannah
- Length: 15 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Neo Babylon, your neural implant is your identity. You use it as your credit card, to surf the Altnet, to chat with friends, to login to work or school, and to be pestered by advertisements. Anyone without one is cut off from society. Nick can’t get a neural implant. That fact turns his daily life into hell, but the city's underworld has its plans for him. Being invisible to the city’s omnipresent tracking has its perks. Without a neural presence, he’s someone who is felt but not seen—a wraith.
-
-
Pointlessly Horny Gattaca
- By Quinn on 03-23-23
By: K.D. Robertson
What listeners say about Headpats After Dark
Highly rated for:
Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Nemesis
- 11-21-23
Razor-sharp writing!
"Headpats After Dark" by Virgil Knightley, narrated by Raya Kane and Richard Brock, weaves a wonderful tale of monster slayer Trevon and the beautiful yet deadly Countess Dracula. The writing is razor-sharp, and the narrators breathe life into this unexpected romance. A thrilling fantasy with a splash of yandere charm, it's a bite-sized adventure that'll leave you craving more.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Disneysingalongs
- 12-12-24
Good overall!
Great story, loved just about everything besides a few side characters here and there. Check it out!
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Jacob
- 02-05-25
Top notch stuff and hilarious BUT
Death's 180, while expected, happened with very little in the way of character progression. He made a choice and then instantly changed it without much convincing, and it seemed like a weak plot point. Other than that, this book was amazing.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- James
- 11-25-23
surprisingly fun
the voice actors were amazing. I think I am a fan of them both now.
the story was very fun to listen to and was fairly comical at certain points.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Andrew
- 01-26-24
Wow
Our boy knocks it out of the park again! Hurry up! We need the rest released!
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- westrner
- 01-05-24
super fun
it is a fun, well done story. worth a credit for sure. wish there was more.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Ross friedman
- 12-08-23
as roaring and well taught. I love how to turned out
When I first saw it, I thought it was an another easy eyebook but it actually turned out better than I thought. I loved to stop of Trevor and the yarney of live typewriters. And how the book ended. I loved it in felt very awesome. I would like to listen to More books like this. And I give this book ten l ten
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Badhon
- 05-19-24
Extremely fun
This one was a light hearted story that was more enjoyable than I thought. The VA’s did a great job here. Hoping to continue this on to the next book.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Vinnie
- 10-27-24
Great listen, but not for me.
I am very picky when it comes to books/audios so keep that in mind with my review. VA was great, story was ok, but both were absolutely just not for me. Right off the bat there is chemistry and very quickly blossoms, I prefer a slow burn that takes its time to develop its characters. Might click for you might not, at least give it a try.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Harry Vass
- 09-28-24
goofy fun
story didn't really stand out but the writing,voice over work and directing was hilarious
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!