The Making and the Re-Making of a Codependent Mind Audiobook By Brian Birdbell, Stephanie Birdbell cover art

The Making and the Re-Making of a Codependent Mind

A Journey Into and Out of Codependency

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The Making and the Re-Making of a Codependent Mind

By: Brian Birdbell, Stephanie Birdbell
Narrated by: Brian Birdbell
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Are you stuck in toxic relationship patterns? Do you seem to attract narcissists or other disordered people? Are you ready to learn how to love yourself and others?

Based on the acclaimed podcast of the same name, follow Brian's transformative journey from codependency and despair to joyful, fulfilling and sustaining relationships. Gain guidance into examining your own life and crafting a personalized pathway to heal from codependency and trauma.

In Part 1 Brian explores:

The family dynamics in childhood that set the stage for codependent habits.

The long term effects of trauma, including its complex and chronic manifestations.

Threat responses (particularly freeze and fawn) and the connection to the behaviors that make up codependency.

The role of shame and fear in deepening codependent habits.

How codependent behaviors foster isolation and perpetuate dysfunctional relationship dynamics.

The toxic interplay between narcissism and codependency, and the trauma bonds that arise in relationships with abusive narcissists.

In Part 2 Brian explains:

What is on the other side of codependency? Is it worth it?

Healing from emotional wounds by connecting with other people, repairing emotional systems and re-writing stories.

Breaking the codependent habits that prevent emotionally intimate relationships.

Acquiring a new approach to romantic relationships.

This book is a beacon of hope for those seeking liberation from codependency's grip, providing both insights and practical guidance for the journey toward authenticity and connection.

©2024 Birdbell, LLC (P)2024 Birdbell, LLC Codependency Personal Development Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Relationships Self-Esteem Emotions
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I loved the book, I thought it was very informative for people who have been struggling with codependency in their relationships

The part where I take accountability for how I’m feeling

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I’ve read many books on codependency and have been involved in recovery settings and therapy groups for decades now, you can tell by the author's lexicon that he has too. No lies there.
I’ve heard all the mantras: “heal yourself first,” “you’re not ready for love,” “don’t rely on others.”
This one… surprised me, just a little. There was honesty and transparency as only someone with years of introspection could muster. There were also times of seemingly intentional elusiveness, maybe for the sake of the personal hero story. The opening thing that almost got glossed over but actually got stated, to the author's great credit:

The beginning of healing from Codependency didn’t happen in therapy.
It happened in a healthy loving Relationship.
Love broke the cycle.

When someone finally listened without flinching.
When someone stayed.
When someone neither tried to fix nor flee.
When someone accepted him as he was, on the condition that he Was a person who was Growing Through something.

I believe that Love can heal. I believe it can Rewrite the Story, Not just the Symptoms.
And I think this book—whether it knows it or not—makes the same case.

If you’ve ever loved someone who’s hurting… or if you’ve ever been the one who kept people away because of your own pain… read this.
Then read it again, slowly.
Start at Chapter 6 though.
You don't need to know the genesis of his negative cycles, you need to know the genesis of Your negative cycles. Reading his just offers one example by which to accustom yourself with A Roadmap, Not Yours.
Start at Chapter 6 and read slowly, how Love broke the cycle.
Start from there and examine the building blocks moving forward. Become a scientist of self and unravel your own messy history...for your own sake.

The scriptures teach that Love covers over a multitude of sins, and this is exactly one of the ways that works itself out in real-time.
Love can be the catalyst for change, even when Love is just left to accept you and be a sounding board, and remind you of how human you are, and not run from you, to believe in you and live up to the 1Corinthians model of love.
Now, that doesn't mean all of the unhealthy codependent stuff. It means the healthy interdependent stuff.

This book didn't even focus on it and almost glossed right over it, but I caught it.
Love Never Fails.
It didn't fail Brian.

Healing doesn’t always start with solitude.
Sometimes it starts when someone says:
“You’re not too much. I’m here.”

-K. Green

This Book Didn't Realize A Truth It Told

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After a whole teen and young adult life spent reading books, going to church, meditating, journaling, and personal development, some things still just didn’t make sense about me to me or anyone else. Putting a name on what it was and unofficially codifying these behaviors told me I’m not just some broken mistake. I’m the way I am for a reason and I can change what is left. Thank you Brian and Stephanie. This is so huge for me.

Answers I have sought for a lifetime

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