Thrivers
The Surprising Reasons Why Some Kids Struggle and Others Shine
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Narrated by:
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Michele Borba Ed D.
About this listen
The best-selling author of UnSelfie explains why the old markers of accomplishment (grades, test scores) are no longer reliable predictors of success in the 21st century - and offers seven teachable traits that will safeguard our kids for the future.
Michele Borba has been a teacher, educational consultant, and parent for 40 years - and she's never been more worried than she is about this current generation of kids. The high-achieving students she talks with every day are more accomplished, better educated, and more privileged than ever before. They're also more stressed, unhappier, and struggling with anxiety, depression, and burnout at younger and younger ages - "we're like pretty packages with nothing inside," said one young teen.
Thrivers are different: They flourish in our fast-paced, digital-driven, often uncertain world. Why? Dr. Borba combed scientific studies on resilience, spoke to dozens of researchers/experts in the field and interviewed more than 100 young people from all walks of life, and she found something surprising: The difference between those who struggle and those who succeed comes down not to grades or test scores, but to seven character traits that set Thrivers apart (and set them up for happiness and greater accomplishment later in life).
These traits - confidence, empathy, self-control, integrity, curiosity, perseverance, and optimism - will allow kids to roll with the punches and succeed in life. And the even better news: These traits can be taught to children at any age...in fact, parents and educations must do so. In Thrivers, Dr. Borba offers practical, actionable ways to develop these traits in children from preschool through high school, showing how to teach kids how to cope today so they can thrive tomorrow.
*This audiobook includes a PDF of a character strength assessment and a core asset survey.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2021 Michele Borba (P)2021 Penguin AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“People say, ‘I wish kids would come with a manual.’ Well now they do. If you want to get parenting right, pick up this book.” (Dr. Phil)
“Thrivers shows the urgency in updating current parenting and educational practices to follow science so children will have the potential to thrive and become their personal best.” (Psychology Today)
“Thrivers offers both science-based information and respectful, practical, and effective tools. Full of activities and ideas to cultivate the skills and mindset kids need to thrive, Borba encourages parents to use everyday moments to respond in ways that build relational and neural connections to promote optimal development, independence, and success. More than ever, our children need us to parent in ways that promote growth and resilience in the face of adversity, and Thrivers can serve as an essential guide.” (Dr. Tina Payne Bryson, New York Times best-selling coauthor of The Whole-Brain Child, No-Drama Discipline, The Yes Brain, and The Power of Showing Up, and author of The Bottom Line for Baby)
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- 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents
- By: Christine Carter
- Narrated by: Emily Durante
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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An essential guide to raising happy children from author Christine Carter, complete with tips, secrets, and strategies that will set the stage for positive emotions into adolescence and beyond.
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One of the best parenting books I have come across
- By Kristine on 02-05-13
By: Christine Carter
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The Formula
- Unlocking the Secrets to Raising Highly Successful Children
- By: Ronald F. Ferguson, Tatsha Robertson
- Narrated by: Cynthia Farrell
- Length: 10 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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In The Formula: Unlocking the Secrets to Raising Highly Successful Children, Harvard economist Ronald Ferguson, named in a New York Times profile as the foremost expert on the US educational "achievement gap," along with award-winning journalist Tatsha Robertson, reveal an intriguing blueprint for helping children from all types of backgrounds become successful adults.
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would recommend
- By Marcia on 02-25-20
By: Ronald F. Ferguson, and others
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Teach Your Children Well
- Parenting for Authentic Success
- By: Madeline Levine PhD
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 10 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Parents, educators, and the media wring their hands about the plight of America's children and teens - soaring rates of emotional problems, limited coping skills, disengagement from learning - and yet there are ways to reverse these disheartening trends. Teach Your Children Well acknowledges that every parent wants successful children. However, until we are clearer about our core values and the parenting choices that are most likely to lead to authentic, and not superficial, success, we will continue to raise exhausted, externally driven, impaired children.
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I wish this book had been published years ago
- By AvidReader on 09-07-12
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It's OK to Go up the Slide
- Renegade Rules for Raising Confident and Creative Kids
- By: Heather Shumaker
- Narrated by: Laurel Lefkow
- Length: 9 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Heather Shumaker has sparked much discussion with her "renegade rules for raising competent and compassionate kids". In this follow-up book, she takes on new hot-button issues like banning homework, technology use, and skipping kindergarten. Shumaker offers broader guidance on how parents can control their own anger and move from an overscheduled life to one of more free play.
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Amazing resource for parents and teachers
- By Ahmed on 05-11-16
By: Heather Shumaker
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Differently Wired
- Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World
- By: Deborah Reber
- Narrated by: Deborah Reber
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are - these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a best-selling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and more.
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very well thought out but not for everyone
- By Trudy Owens on 01-01-19
By: Deborah Reber
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I Wish My Teacher Knew
- How One Question Can Change Everything for Our Kids
- By: Kyle Schwartz
- Narrated by: Allyson Ryan
- Length: 6 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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One day, third-grade teacher Kyle Schwartz asked her students to fill in the blank in this sentence: "I wish my teacher knew _____." The results astounded her. Some answers were humorous; others were heartbreaking; all were profoundly moving and enlightening. The results opened her eyes to the need for educators to understand the unique realities their students face in order to create an open, safe, and supportive place in the classroom. When Schwartz shared her experience online, #IWishMyTeacherKnew became an immediate worldwide viral phenomenon.
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Not worth the time
- By James M George on 06-29-20
By: Kyle Schwartz
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The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans
- How to Decode Their Behavior, Develop Unshakable Trust, and Raise a Respectable Adult
- By: Josh Shipp
- Narrated by: Roger Wayne
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Written in Shipp's playfully authoritative, no-nonsense voice, The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans tells his story and unpacks practical strategies that can make a difference. Ultimately, it's not about shortcuts or magic words - as Shipp reminds us, it's about investing in kids and giving them the love, time, and support they need to thrive. And that means every kid is one caring adult away from being a success story.
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Read it....then read it again!
- By R. Eichelberger on 11-07-17
By: Josh Shipp
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Parenting Without Power Struggles
- Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids While Staying Cool, Calm, and Connected
- By: Susan Stiffelman
- Narrated by: Susan Stiffelman
- Length: 8 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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While most parenting programs are designed to coerce kids to change, Parenting Without Power Struggles does something innovative, showing you how to help your children awaken their natural instincts to cooperate, rather than employing threats or bribes, which inevitably fuels their resistance. By staying calm and being the confident "captain of the ship" your child needs, you will learn how to parent from a place of strong, durable connection, and you'll be better able to help your kids navigate the challenging moments of growing up.
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Highly recommended.
- By Nothing really matters on 10-13-13
By: Susan Stiffelman
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Limitless Mind
- Learn, Lead, and Live Without Barriers
- By: Jo Boaler
- Narrated by: Jo Boaler
- Length: 6 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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In this revolutionary book, a professor of education at Stanford University and acclaimed math educator who has spent decades studying the impact of beliefs and bias on education, reveals the six keys to unlocking learning potential, based on the latest scientific findings.
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Title does not reflect audience
- By Oliver Nielsen on 05-02-20
By: Jo Boaler
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The Importance of Being Little
- What Preschoolers Really Need from Grownups
- By: Erika Christakis
- Narrated by: Teri Schnaubelt
- Length: 12 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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A bold challenge to the conventional wisdom about early childhood, with a pragmatic program to encourage parents and teachers to rethink how and where young children learn best by taking the child's eye view of the learning environment.
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Points out many problems; offers no real solution
- By K. Lynn on 08-06-18
By: Erika Christakis
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Onward
- Cultivating Emotional Resilience in Educators
- By: Elena Aguilar
- Narrated by: Eileen Stevens
- Length: 13 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Onward tackles the problem of educator stress, and provides a practical framework for taking the burnout out of teaching. Stress is part of the job, but when 70 percent of teachers quit within their first five years because the stress is making them physically and mentally ill, things have gone too far. Unsurprisingly, these effects are highest in difficult-to-fill positions such as math, science, and foreign languages, and in urban areas and secondary classrooms - places where we need our teachers to be especially motivated and engaged.
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Narrator is a real dud!
- By Paris Granville on 08-11-18
By: Elena Aguilar
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Positive Discipline Tools for Teachers
- Effective Classroom Management for Social, Emotional, and Academic Success
- By: Jane Nelsen, Kelly Gfroerer
- Narrated by: Virginia Wolf
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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The positive discipline method has proved to be an invaluable resource for teachers who want to foster creative problem-solving within their students, giving them the behavioral skills they need to understand and process what they learn. Each tool is tailored specifically for the modern teacher, with examples and solutions to each and every roadblock that stands in the way of cooperative and student-centered learning.
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Good ideas but misleading
- By J. Frazier on 03-29-18
By: Jane Nelsen, and others
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Slay Like a Mother
- How to Destroy What's Holding You Back So You Can Live the Life You Want
- By: Katherine Wintsch
- Narrated by: Katherine Wintsch
- Length: 8 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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In this emotionally charged how-to guide, you'll laugh, you'll cry, and you'll discover eye-opening lessons about: The mask you're wearing. The one you hide behind when you say everything is "just fine" when it's not. Your unrealistic expectations. The goal-setting tactics you're deploying to get ahead could be what's holding you back. The difference between struggling and suffering. Being a mother is a struggle - it always has been - but your suffering is optional.
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Great for dads too!
- By Earl Cox on 06-20-19
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Best-selling author Michele Borba offers a nine-step program to help parents cultivate empathy in children, from birth to young adulthood - and explains why developing a healthy sense of empathy is a key predictor of which kids will thrive and succeed in the future.
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Practical, wise, and well researched
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Why is it so hard to change problem behavior - in our kids, our colleagues, and even ourselves? Conventional methods often backfire, creating a downward spiral of resentment and frustration, and a missed opportunity for growth. What if the thinking behind these old methods is wrong? What if people don’t misbehave because they want to, but because they lack the skills to do better? Or as renowned psychologist J. Stuart Ablon asks, what if changing problem behavior is a matter of skill, not will?
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Must read!
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The Yes Brain
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When facing contentious issues such as screen time, food choices, and bedtime, children often act out or shut down, responding with reactivity instead of receptivity. This is what New York Times best-selling authors Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson call a No Brain response. But our kids can be taught to approach life with openness and curiosity. When kids work from a Yes Brain, they’re more willing to take chances and explore. They’re more curious and imaginative. They’re better at relationships and handling adversity.
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Where is the PDF
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How to Raise Kids Who Aren't Assholes
- Science-Based Strategies for Better Parenting - from Tots to Teens
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As an award-winning science journalist, Melinda Wenner Moyer was regularly asked to investigate and address all kinds of parenting questions. But as Melinda's children grew, she found that one huge area was ignored in the realm of parenting advice: How do we make sure our kids don't grow up to be assholes? How to Raise Kids Who Aren't Assholes is a deeply researched, evidence-based primer that provides a fresh, often surprising perspective on parenting issues, from toddlerhood through the teenage years.
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Outstanding, research-based parenting book.
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Decoding Boys
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As pediatrician and mother of two teenagers Cara Natterson explains, puberty starts in boys long before any visible signs appear, and that causes confusion about their changing temperaments for boys and parents alike. Often, they also grow quieter as they grow taller, which leads to less parent-child communication. But, as Natterson warns in Decoding Boys, we respect their increasing "need" for privacy, monosyllabic conversations, and alone time at their peril.
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wanted to give 5 but last chapter is so biased
- By Jeff Bullock on 01-15-22
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UnSelfie
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Best-selling author Michele Borba offers a nine-step program to help parents cultivate empathy in children, from birth to young adulthood - and explains why developing a healthy sense of empathy is a key predictor of which kids will thrive and succeed in the future.
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EVERY PARENT & EVERY CHILD
- By Dana L. Eldridge on 11-15-17
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The Self-Driven Child
- The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control over Their Lives
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- Length: 11 hrs and 35 mins
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Performance
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Many of us know we're putting too much pressure on our kids - and on ourselves - but how do we get off this crazy train? We want our children to succeed, to be their best, and to do their best, but what if they are not on board? A few years ago, Ned Johnson and Bill Stixrud started noticing the same problem from different angles: even high-performing kids were coming to them acutely stressed and lacking any real motivation. Many complained that they had no real control over their lives.
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Practical, wise, and well researched
- By Andrew on 07-12-18
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Changeable
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Why is it so hard to change problem behavior - in our kids, our colleagues, and even ourselves? Conventional methods often backfire, creating a downward spiral of resentment and frustration, and a missed opportunity for growth. What if the thinking behind these old methods is wrong? What if people don’t misbehave because they want to, but because they lack the skills to do better? Or as renowned psychologist J. Stuart Ablon asks, what if changing problem behavior is a matter of skill, not will?
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Must read!
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By: J. Stuart Ablon
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The Yes Brain
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When facing contentious issues such as screen time, food choices, and bedtime, children often act out or shut down, responding with reactivity instead of receptivity. This is what New York Times best-selling authors Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson call a No Brain response. But our kids can be taught to approach life with openness and curiosity. When kids work from a Yes Brain, they’re more willing to take chances and explore. They’re more curious and imaginative. They’re better at relationships and handling adversity.
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Where is the PDF
- By Online Shopper on 02-15-18
By: Daniel J. Siegel M.D., and others
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How to Raise Kids Who Aren't Assholes
- Science-Based Strategies for Better Parenting - from Tots to Teens
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As an award-winning science journalist, Melinda Wenner Moyer was regularly asked to investigate and address all kinds of parenting questions. But as Melinda's children grew, she found that one huge area was ignored in the realm of parenting advice: How do we make sure our kids don't grow up to be assholes? How to Raise Kids Who Aren't Assholes is a deeply researched, evidence-based primer that provides a fresh, often surprising perspective on parenting issues, from toddlerhood through the teenage years.
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wanted to give 5 but last chapter is so biased
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Seven and a Half Lessons About the Brain
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Have you ever wondered why you have a brain? Let renowned neuroscientist Lisa Feldman Barrett demystify that big gray blob between your ears. In seven short essays (plus a bite-sized story about how brains evolved), this slim, entertaining, and accessible collection reveals mind-expanding lessons from the front lines of neuroscience research. You'll learn where brains came from, how they're structured (and why it matters), and how yours works in tandem with other brains to create everything you experience.
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slow reader & little bit of a Wokie
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Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen
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The 14 essential conversations to have with your tween and early teenager to prepare them for the emotional, physical, and social challenges ahead, including scripts and advice to keep the communication going and stay connected during this critical developmental window.
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Critical race theory teachings
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The Power of Showing Up
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One of the very best scientific predictors for how any child turns out - in terms of happiness, academic success, leadership skills, and meaningful relationships - is whether at least one adult in their life has consistently shown up for them. In an age of scheduling demands and digital distractions, showing up for your child might sound like a tall order. But as best-selling authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson reassuringly explain, it doesn’t take a lot of time, energy, or money. Instead, showing up means offering a quality of presence.
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Great Educators
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Unconditional Parenting
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One basic need all children have, educator Alfie Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful and largely unknown research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval.
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He doesn’t think much of parents
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How to Raise an Adult
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In How to Raise an Adult, Julie Lythcott-Haims draws on research; on conversations with admissions officers, educators, and employers; and on her own insights as a mother and as a student dean to highlight the ways in which overparenting harms children, their stressed-out parents, and society at large.
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Target Audience- Upper-Middle Class
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Brainstorm
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Overall
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Between the ages of twelve and twenty-four, the brain changes in important and, at times, challenging ways. In Brainstorm, the renowned psychiatrist and bestselling author of Parenting from the Inside Out, The Whole-Brain Child, and Mindsight, Daniel Siegel busts a number of commonly held myths about adolescence — for example, that it is merely a stage of “immaturity” filled with often “crazy” behavior — to reveal how it is in fact a vital time in our lives in terms of charting the course for the adults we ultimately become.
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Narration for kindergarteners...
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Siblings Without Rivalry
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When parenting authorities Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish sat down to write the national best seller How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk, they found they could not contain their chapter on sibling rivalry. No matter how much they tried to pare down their advice, they found the subject inexhaustible—and parents agreed! Siblings Without Rivalry guides the way to family peace and tranquility with humor and compassion for both parents and children.
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Doesn't Get to the Heart
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There's No Such Thing as Bad Weather
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Bringing Up Bébé meets Last Child in the Woods in this lively, insightful memoir about a mother who sets out to discover if the nature-centric parenting philosophy of her native Scandinavia holds the key to healthier, happier lives for her American children.
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Great concept, interesting writing.
- By Kate on 11-03-17
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Dark Calories
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The New York Times bestselling author of Deep Nutrition explains how a group of eight little-known oils cause the cellular damage that underlies virtually all chronic disease, exposes the corruption that deceives doctors and consumers into eating them, and gives us a clear roadmap to recovery and rejuvenation.
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Phenomenal!
- By Mike on 06-13-24
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The Danish Way of Parenting
- What the Happiest People in the World Know About Raising Confident, Capable Kids
- By: Jessica Joelle Alexander, Dissing Sandahl
- Narrated by: Kim Mai Guest
- Length: 3 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
What makes Denmark the happiest country in the world - and how do Danish parents raise happy, confident, successful kids, year after year? This upbeat and practical book presents six essential principles, which spell out P-A-R-E-N-T. With illuminating examples and simple yet powerful advice, The Danish Way of Parenting will help parents from all walks of life raise the happiest, most well-adjusted kids in the world.
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Obvious parenting tips unrelated to Danes
- By Rachel H. on 09-24-16
By: Jessica Joelle Alexander, and others
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Simplicity Parenting
- Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
- By: Kim John Payne, Lisa M. Ross
- Narrated by: Arthur Morey
- Length: 9 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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From internationally renowned family consultant Kim John Payne comes an eloquent guide that seeks to help parents reclaim for their children the space and freedom that all kids need for their individuality to flourish.
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A worthwhile listen for new parents
- By Kathy K on 07-30-12
By: Kim John Payne, and others
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The Science of Self-Discipline
- The Willpower, Mental Toughness, and Self-Control to Resist Temptation and Achieve Your Goals
- By: Peter Hollins
- Narrated by: Peter Hollins
- Length: 3 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Your best intentions are not enough. Learn how to scientifically engineer a disciplined existence, become relentless, and never give up. Whatever you want in your life, self-discipline is the missing piece. Goals will remain dreams if you make the mistake of relying on motivation and your best drawn plans. The Science of Self-Discipline is a deep look into what allows us to resist our worst impulses and simply execute, achieve, produce, and focus. Every principle is scientifically-driven and dissected to as be actionable and helpful as possible. You'll learn how top performers consistently exercise self-discipline, as well as what drives us on an instinctual, psychological level to act.
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Same old tired rehash of studies and common sense
- By A. Molnar on 07-12-18
By: Peter Hollins
What listeners say about Thrivers
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Amazon Customer
- 07-09-22
So many words of wisdom
Easy to apply for kids today. Will be buying the paperback to make notes. Thanks!
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- R.Rogge
- 08-11-22
Great listen for teachers and parents
Kids are changing and so are their needs. This book gave wonderful insight into todays youth and gave loads of actionable steps to help assist all adolescents as a teacher, mentor, or parent.
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Overall
- Anonymous User
- 12-27-21
A must read for parents
Well researched, amazing biographies and stories, thought provoking, and highly practical recommendations. a must read!
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- Amazon Customer
- 01-02-24
What I can do to help my child become a Thriver
I liked all the ideas that were given in the book. I wish I had the information earlier.
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- Zackery Zounes
- 05-21-22
Probably the best of these types of books
Pros: cites sources, good advice, well argued, author is very experienced.
Cons: slight fear mongering, key traits seem exclusive (like you can only thrive with these 7 traits), all examples of "success" are things like "class president" or "successful inventor at age 6" or "Einstein" which is contrary tonher argument
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1 person found this helpful
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- Crystal McGrath
- 10-03-22
Great for parents to help kids
I found this to be great information to help my kids become better and help them grow into strong, confident and resilient adults.
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- H. Ellis
- 01-16-23
Helpful research and advice about what’s really important
Helpful research and advice about what’s really important in parenting. A little dense, I kind of wanted the print version so I could take notes and underline key passages. It’s kind of geared toward helicopter tiger moms, but I would recommend for all parents.
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- Bobbie Strong
- 12-15-23
BEST PARENTING BOOK IVE EVEE READ
just finished it and want to start it again!! Absolutely a must read for ALL parents today ❤️
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- Ruth
- 04-28-21
This book is essential
As a seasoned teacher and mother of two teenage boys, Dr, Botha has given me hope, information, and tools to continue to help mold thriving humans... thank you!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Pedro Cervantes
- 07-25-24
In uncertain times, raise kids on purpose with purpose.
I found this book to be motivating and inspiring. My focus with my daughters this summer is on building up their self esteem so they know their worth in the face of adversity, fickle friendships, finding the good in the world to keep them moving forward, and loving themselves knowing they have the ability to make a difference. This book offered so many great insights. Thank you!
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