Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen
The Essential Conversations You Need to Have with Your Kids Before They Start High School
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Narrated by:
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Michelle Icard
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By:
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Michelle Icard
About this listen
The 14 essential conversations to have with your tween and early teenager to prepare them for the emotional, physical, and social challenges ahead, including scripts and advice to keep the communication going and stay connected during this critical developmental window.
"This book is a gift to parents and teenagers alike." (Lisa Damour, PhD, author of Untangled and Under Pressure)
Trying to convince a middle schooler to listen to you can be exasperating. Indeed, it can feel like the best option is not to talk! But keeping kids safe - and prepared for all the times when you can't be the angel on their shoulder - is about having the right conversations at the right time. From a brain growth and emotional readiness perspective, there is no better time for this than their tween years, right up to when they enter high school.
Distilling Michelle Icard's decades of experience working with families, Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen focuses on big, thorny topics such as friendship, sexuality, impulsivity, and technology, as well as unexpected conversations about creativity, hygiene, money, privilege, and contributing to the family. Icard outlines a simple, memorable, and family-tested formula for the best approach to these essential talks, the BRIEF Model: Begin peacefully, Relate to your child, Interview to collect information, Echo what you're hearing, and give Feedback. With wit and compassion, she also helps you get over the most common hurdles in talking to tweens, including:
- What phrases invite connection and which irritate kids or scare them off
- The best places, times, and situations in which to initiate talks
- How to keep kids interested, open, and engaged in conversation
- How to exit these chats in a way that keeps kids wanting more
Like a Rosetta Stone for your tween's confounding language, Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen is an essential communication guide to helping your child through the emotional, physical, and social challenges ahead and, ultimately, toward teenage success.
This audiobook includes a downloadable PDF of conversation starters to have with your kids.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2021 Michelle Icard (P)2021 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“There’s no such thing as The Talk anymore. To raise the healthiest, most resilient kids, parents need to have hundreds of talks over many years. With Michelle Icard’s big-picture framing of what to cover and deep dive into how you can say it all, the task will be much less daunting. It might even be fun.” (Cara Natterson, MD, author of Decoding Boys: New Science Behind the Subtle Art of Raising Sons)
“Fourteen (Talks) by (Age) Fourteen offers incredible insight and empathy to both young adolescents and their stressed-out parents. Icard makes clear that the stakes are high - we must not shy away from these crucial conversations with our children. This book is the guide we’ve been waiting for.”— (Devorah Heitner, PhD, author of Screenwise: Helping Kids Thrive (and Survive) in Their Digital World)
“An incredibly user-friendly and straightforward guide. A must-read for caregivers of adolescents, providing readers with the necessary tools to talk to their tweens and sustain happy and healthy relationships.” (Booklist)
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New York Times–bestselling authors Richard and Linda Eyre have spent the last twenty-five years helping parents nurture strong, healthy families. Now they’ve synthesized their vast experience into an essential blueprint for instilling children with a sense of ownership, responsibility, and self-sufficiency. At the heart of their plan is a “Family Economy”, complete with a family bank, checkbooks for the kids, and a system of responsibilities that teaches children to earn money for the things they want.
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Best Parenting Book Ever!
- By Paul on 07-11-15
By: Richard Eyre, and others
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The Available Parent
- Expert Advice for Raising Successful and Resilient Teens and Tweens
- By: John Duffy
- Narrated by: David Colacci
- Length: 5 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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We have a tendency today to over-parent, micromanage, and underappreciate our adolescents. Dr. John Duffy's The Available Parent is a revolutionary approach to taking care of teens and tweens. The available parent of a teenager is open to discussion, offering advice and solutions but not insisting on them. He allows his child to make some mistakes, setting limits, primarily where health and safety are concerned. He never lectures - he is available but not controlling. He is neither cruel nor dismissive, ever....
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Parenting teens can be much less stressful!
- By Kathi on 06-12-14
By: John Duffy
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For Parents Only
- Getting Inside the Head of Your Kid
- By: Shaunti Feldhahn, Lisa Author Rice
- Narrated by: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Length: 3 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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What parent hasn't occasionally looked at their beloved but bewildering offspring and wondered, what in the world is he thinking, or why is my sweet little girl acting like that? In this remarkable audiobook, Shaunti Feldhahn and Lisa Rice take you inside the mind of teens and preteens through the same innovative approach that seized national attention in the best-selling book For Women Only, For Men Only, and For Young Women Only.
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great points, extremely Christian
- By Kimiko Carpenter on 05-25-22
By: Shaunti Feldhahn, and others
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Teach Your Children Well
- Parenting for Authentic Success
- By: Madeline Levine PhD
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 10 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Parents, educators, and the media wring their hands about the plight of America's children and teens - soaring rates of emotional problems, limited coping skills, disengagement from learning - and yet there are ways to reverse these disheartening trends. Teach Your Children Well acknowledges that every parent wants successful children. However, until we are clearer about our core values and the parenting choices that are most likely to lead to authentic, and not superficial, success, we will continue to raise exhausted, externally driven, impaired children.
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I wish this book had been published years ago
- By AvidReader on 09-07-12
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The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness
- Five Steps to Help Kids Create and Sustain Lifelong Joy
- By: Edward M. Hallowell MD
- Narrated by: Pete Larkin
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Edward M. Hallowell, MD, father of three and a clinical psychiatrist, has thought long and hard about what makes children feel good about themselves and the world they live in. Now, in The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness, he shares his findings with all of us who care about children. We don't need statistical studies or complicated expert opinions to raise children. What we do need is love, wonder, and the confidence to trust our instincts.
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Love this book and will be listening again
- By Jenny on 09-15-22
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Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours
- By: Kevin Leman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 7 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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We have seen the enemy . . . and they are small. If anyone understands why children behave the way they do, it's psychologist and best-selling author Dr. Kevin Leman. Equipping you with seven principles of Reality Discipline, this father of five shows you how to get kids to do what you want them to do, foil finicky eaters, turn off temper tantrums, and minimize sibling rivalries, use authority and decisiveness to show your kids you're not a pushover, and know when to take the little buzzards by the beak.
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Life Saver for you and your kid!
- By Amber on 09-21-10
By: Kevin Leman
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Raising Happiness
- 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents
- By: Christine Carter
- Narrated by: Emily Durante
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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An essential guide to raising happy children from author Christine Carter, complete with tips, secrets, and strategies that will set the stage for positive emotions into adolescence and beyond.
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One of the best parenting books I have come across
- By Kristine on 02-05-13
By: Christine Carter
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Your Turn
- How to Be an Adult
- By: Julie Lythcott-Haims
- Narrated by: Julie Lythcott-Haims
- Length: 20 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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What does it mean to be an adult? In the 20th century, psychologists came up with five markers of adulthood: finish your education, get a job, leave home, marry, and have children. Since then, every generation has been held to those same markers. Yet so much has changed about the world and living in it since that sequence was formulated. All of those markers are choices, and they’re all valid, but any one person’s choices along those lines do not make them more or less an adult.
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Not the book that was advertised
- By M. Rogers on 04-13-21
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Have a New Teenager by Friday
- From Mouthy and Moody to Respectful and Responsible in 5 Days
- By: Kevin Leman
- Narrated by: Kirby Heybourne
- Length: 9 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Congratulations! You have a teenager in your home. Life will never quite be the same again (of course, you already know that). But it can be better than you’ve ever dreamed. In fact, you’re just five days away from your teenager asking, “What can I do to help?” Guaranteed! With his signature wit and commonsense psychology, internationally recognized family expert and New York Times best-selling author Dr. Kevin Leman will help you. your teenager’s life. With Dr. Leman’s instinct and insight, plus an index with gutsy advice on 75 hot-button issues that keep parents up at night.
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Listen with a Critical Mind
- By Stephanie on 03-25-13
By: Kevin Leman
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The Gentle Sleep Book
- For Calm Babies, Toddlers and Pre-Schoolers
- By: Sarah Ockwell-Smith
- Narrated by: Katy Sobey
- Length: 8 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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The Gentle Sleep Book offers gentle, no-tears sleep solutions for exhausted parents of newborns to five-year-olds. A large percentage of parents find their young children's sleep - or lack of - challenging. This new audiobook from Sarah Ockwell-Smith, founder of BabyCalm, will be an indispensable guide for parents, whatever challenges they are facing with their child's sleep - from the day they bring their newborn home until their child is settled in at school.
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It's fine but not much about 2-4 years
- By Patrick on 02-12-18
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Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Became Parents
- By: Shannon Warden, Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 4 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Gary Chapman has helped millions prepare for marriage. Now let him prepare you for kids. Inside, Gary shares what he wishes he and his wife had known before having kids. For example: Children affect your time, your money, and your marriage - and that's just the beginning. With his trademark warmth, he offers practical advice on everything from potty training, to the importance of apologizing to your child, to keeping your marriage strong, all the while celebrating the great joy that children bring.
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Good tips
- By Alex Ilyaev on 03-25-19
By: Shannon Warden, and others
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The Me, Me, Me Epidemic
- A Step-by-Step Guide to Raising Capable, Grateful Kids in an Over-Entitled World
- By: Amy McCready
- Narrated by: Margaret Strom
- Length: 12 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Whenever Amy McCready mentions the "entitlement epidemic" to a group of parents, she is inevitably met with eye rolls, nodding heads, and loaded comments about affected children. It seems everywhere one looks, there are preschoolers who only behave in the grocery store for a treat, narcissistic teenagers posting selfies across all forms of social media, and adult children living off their parents. Parenting expert Amy McCready reveals in this book that the solution is to help kids develop healthy attitudes in life.
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Longer than it needs to be, condescending narration, but did have some good tidbits
- By Areeeee on 09-27-19
By: Amy McCready
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Social Justice Parenting
- How to Raise Compassionate, Anti-Racist, Justice-Minded Kids in an Unjust World
- By: Traci Baxley
- Narrated by: Traci Baxley
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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As a global pandemic shuttered schools across the country in 2020, parents found themselves thrust into the role of teacher — in more ways than one. Not only did they take on remote school supervision, but after the murder of George Floyd and the ensuing Black Lives Matter protests, many also grappled with the responsibility to teach their kids about social justice — with few resources to guide them.
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Inspiring, motivating, practical
- By Heather Janetzko on 03-18-24
By: Traci Baxley
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Thanks for the Feedback
- The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well
- By: Sheila Heen, Douglas Stone
- Narrated by: Sheila Heen, Douglas Stone
- Length: 9 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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The coauthors of the New York Times best-selling Difficult Conversations take on the toughest topic of all: How we see ourselves. Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen have spent the past 15 years working with corporations, nonprofits, governments, and families to determine what helps us learn and what gets in our way. In Thanks for the Feedback, they explain why receiving feedback is so crucial yet so challenging. They blend the latest insights from neuroscience and psychology with practical, hard-headed advice.
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Poor narration ruins yet another good read
- By WordNerd on 08-25-14
By: Sheila Heen, and others
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Preachy and Uninformative
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The Emotional Lives of Teenagers
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In teenagers, powerful emotions come with the territory. And with so many of today’s teens contending with academic pressure, social media stress, worries about the future, and concerns about their own mental health, it’s easy for them—and their parents—to feel anxious and overwhelmed. But it doesn’t have to be that way. With clear, research-informed explanations alongside illuminating, real-life examples, The Emotional Lives of Teenagers gives parents the information they need to steady their teens through the bumpy yet transformational journey into adulthood.
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Only at introduction and…
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I was “forced” to read this book!
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In teenagers, powerful emotions come with the territory. And with so many of today’s teens contending with academic pressure, social media stress, worries about the future, and concerns about their own mental health, it’s easy for them—and their parents—to feel anxious and overwhelmed. But it doesn’t have to be that way. With clear, research-informed explanations alongside illuminating, real-life examples, The Emotional Lives of Teenagers gives parents the information they need to steady their teens through the bumpy yet transformational journey into adulthood.
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As parents, your number one goal is to prepare your children to leave the nest and flourish on their own. And let’s face it: you only have a few more years to teach your teen everything they need to know before they take on the world as young adults. Discover what you need to know about parenting now for your teen to have success later. This complete step-by-step guide will help you get through to your teen by discovering the inner workings of their minds and using this to inform your parenting.
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This really helped me
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How to Hug a Porcupine
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Yesterday, your child was a sweet, well-adjusted eight-year-old. Today, a moody, disrespectful 12-year-old. What happened? And more important, how do you handle it? How you respond to these whirlwind changes will not only affect your child's behavior now but will determine how he or she turns out later. Julie A. Ross, executive director of Parenting Horizons, shows you exactly what's going on with your child and provides all the tools you need to correctly handle even the prickliest tween porcupine.
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Great advice, so timely.
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Parents will gain insight into how to transform their parenting to help middle schoolers find greater independence, connect well with peers, and have the deepest learning possible in and out of school. Educators will learn about the developmental keys to making middle school a place of belonging, with deep social and emotional learning and academics that draw out students' full motivation and potential.
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How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex
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In the six lessons of How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex, you will join sex and health educator Justine Ang Fonte as she guides you through a holistic approach to sex education for kids of all ages, from toddlers to teens. And this education isn’t just about having direct conversations or teaching lessons—it’s also about cultivating a safe space where children feel comfortable asking questions without judgement or shame.
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Too "woke" for me
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Internationally acclaimed parenting experts Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish have helped millions of families with their breakthrough, best-selling books. Now, they return with a lively, down-to-earth guide that tackles the tough issues teens and parents face today. After years of research, lecturing, and feedback, Faber and Mazlish have developed an innovative approach to maintaining a candid, open, mutually respectful dialogue between parents and teens.
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Might be OK with different narrators
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Between
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Raising a tween can leave you feeling like a parenting beginner all over again. Children in the 'between' stage seem to change daily, leaving many parents struggling to understand the child they once thought they knew so well. In Between, parenting expert and mother of four Sarah Ockwell-Smith uses a unique blend of the biology, psychology, and sociology of adolescence as the basis for practical parenting advice that you can use to help your child through the transition from childhood to adulthood.
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Many positive features with a few drawbacks
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7 Vital Skills for Parenting Teen Boys and Communicating with Your Teenage Son
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As a parent or guardian of a teenaged boy, you understand the unique challenges that you have to overcome - your son’s lack of communication and poor listening skills, the mood swings, lack of discipline and, maybe, even some personal hygiene issues. But the same precious and loving son is still in that overgrown, clumsy body. You just must learn to understand that most of what you are dealing with is a normal part of going through puberty and maturing.
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Don’t waste a credit
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The Power of Showing Up
- How Parental Presence Shapes Who Our Kids Become and How Their Brains Get Wired
- By: Daniel J. Siegel MD, Tina Payne Bryson PhD
- Narrated by: Daniel J. Siegel MD, Tina Payne Bryson PhD
- Length: 7 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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One of the very best scientific predictors for how any child turns out - in terms of happiness, academic success, leadership skills, and meaningful relationships - is whether at least one adult in their life has consistently shown up for them. In an age of scheduling demands and digital distractions, showing up for your child might sound like a tall order. But as best-selling authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson reassuringly explain, it doesn’t take a lot of time, energy, or money. Instead, showing up means offering a quality of presence.
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Great Educators
- By Bored on 02-26-21
By: Daniel J. Siegel MD, and others
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Thrivers
- The Surprising Reasons Why Some Kids Struggle and Others Shine
- By: Michele Borba Ed D.
- Narrated by: Michele Borba Ed D.
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- Unabridged
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Michele Borba has been a teacher, educational consultant, and parent for 40 years - and she's never been more worried than she is about this current generation of kids. The high-achieving students she talks with every day are more accomplished, better educated, and more privileged than ever before. They're also more stressed, unhappier, and struggling with anxiety, depression, and burnout at younger and younger ages - "we're like pretty packages with nothing inside," said one young teen.
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Mixed Review
- By Ironmankcc on 05-19-21
What listeners say about Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- bgn
- 02-07-23
A must read for all pre teen and teenage parents!
A must read for parents of 10-16 year olds, even older teens and parents can benefit from this book.
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- Zbrutha
- 12-14-23
Reansonable conversations
To me, this read like a dialogue to determine what is healthy development and where interventions may be necessary. Although I tend to crave more concrete data and case studies, I didn’t feel deprived of facts and statistics. This is a good resource for parents to help their children navigate their life in a balanced and supportive manner.
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- Kathleen
- 06-13-22
Very helpful
wish I would have had this book before I was in the midst of raising my 14 year old granddaughter. Needed it at least before middle school. Addresses current teen issues...very up to date. Will listen to a few more times....lots of great information.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 07-15-23
Very informative
I will be referencing this for my two daughters as well as for my high school students.
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- C. Barry
- 01-18-24
Realistic & so useful
This book is upfront, honest, realistic and so so helpful to parents! Even with a lot of knowledge in this area already, I learned a lot and found the many examples incredibly helpful!
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- Jennifer
- 01-09-23
Great Parenting Advice
This audiobook was very helpful and gives a logical practical approach to parenting a tween/teen that I can lean on when things get tough. Emotions can run high for parents and kids in these years, this book definitely gave me some tools to keep my cool and maintain my connection with my daughters.
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- Alicia S. Webster
- 01-23-23
Great guide to important topics with your tween!
This was really well done. I like the way the book is laid out, and although it’s a lot to take in at once, I’m sure I’ll be using this as a bit of a reference guide when tough topics come up or important conversations need to happen. I appreciate the author’s approach, which falls in line with a Peaceful Parenting style. It’s a great next step of you’ve been using the resources of people like Dr. Laura Markham for younger kids, and want to continue relating respectfully and openly with your child as they grow into a young adult.
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- Anonymous User
- 01-24-23
Great listen
Such an easy to listen to, practical guide which I would highly recommend and will be listening to again in the near future
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- Anne E Koontz
- 03-04-23
Great advice
I have an 8 and an 11 year old and really found this helpful. Will probably listen a second time to really get the advice down. Does a great job of giving you frameworks to adapt to whatever your particular situation is.
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- Anonymous User
- 01-01-22
Love the structure of this book
The author made me think about different ways to approach problems my teen is struggling with now. I can immediately think of things to do differently than I do now. She covers pretty much every “hot topic” relating to kids this age. The structure of the book is helpful so you can focus on the areas that matter most to you. You don’t have to listen to the whole thing, but I recommend you do!
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1 person found this helpful