
Disobedient Women
How a Small Group of Faithful Women Exposed Abuse, Brought Down Powerful Pastors, and Ignited an Evangelical Reckoning
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Narrated by:
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Suehyla Young
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By:
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Sarah Stankorb
About this listen
In this national bestseller, journalist Sarah Stankorb outlines how access to the internet—its networks, freedom of expression, and resources for deeply researching and reporting on powerful church figures—allowed women to begin dismantling the false authority of evangelical communities that had long demanded their submission.
A generation of American Christian girls was taught submitting to men is God’s will. They were taught not to question the men in their families or their pastors. They were told to remain sexually pure and trained to feel shame if a man was tempted. Some of these girls were abused and assaulted. Some made to shrink down so small they became a shadow of themselves. To question their leaders was to question God.
All the while, their male leaders built fiefdoms from megachurches and sprawling ministries. They influenced politics and policy. To protect their church’s influence, these men covered up and hid abuse. American Christian patriarchy, as it rose in political power and cultural sway over the past four decades, hurt many faithful believers. Millions of Americans abandoned churches they once loved.
Yet among those who stayed (and a few who still loved the church they fled), a brave group of women spoke up. They built online megaphones, using the democratizing power of technology to create long-overdue change.
In Disobedient Women, journalist Sarah Stankorb gives long-overdue recognition for these everyday women as leaders and as voices for a different sort of faith. Their work has driven journalists to help bring abuse stories to national attention. Stankorb weaves together the efforts of these courageous voices in order to present a full, layered portrait of the treatment of women and the fight for change within the modern American church.
Disobedient Women is not just a look at the women who have used the internet to bring down the religious power structures that were meant to keep them quiet, but also a picture of the large-scale changes that are happening within evangelical culture regarding women’s roles, ultimately underscoring the ways technology has created a place for women to challenge traditional institutions from within.
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Critic reviews
“Journalist Stankorb debuts with an intimate and engrossing look at how a small number of evangelical women have engaged in an \"Online battle\" with the American evangelical church, challenging the rigid gender roles favored by ultraconservative church leaders… Sheds fascinating light on the process of deprogramming from extremist religion. Weaving in her own faith journey as the child of an abusive alcoholic father, Stankorb delivers a compassionate portrait of pain and perseverance.”—Publishers Weekly (starred review)
"Sarah Stankorb writes with extreme empathy about generations of women who grew up in the church and are finding a way out... unwinding a mental landscape of power and sexuality that informed their entire selves. It takes incredible strength to do this, and Stankorb deeply understands each woman’s journey."—Michelle Legro, editor at WIRED
“With meticulous reporting and deft writing, journalist Sarah Stankorb tells the story of women who despite great odds and opposition stood up to the Christian leaders and system that abused them and told them they were worthless unless they obeyed… In between the stories of survivors, Stankorb tells the story of the unraveling of her own faith and her own struggles to escape the pain of her family’s past and find a way forward.”—Bob Smeitana, author of Reorganized Religion
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- By: Cait West
- Narrated by: Cait West
- Length: 8 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Raised in the Christian patriarchy movement, Cait West was homeschooled and could only wear clothes her father deemed modest. She was five years old the first time she was told her swimsuit was too revealing, to go change. There would be no college in her future, no career. She was a stay-at-home daughter and would move out only when her father allowed her to become a wife. She was trained to serve men, and her life would never be her own.
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Compelling narrative and beautifully written
- By Maria Hauskins on 05-05-24
By: Cait West
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A Well-Trained Wife
- My Escape from Christian Patriarchy
- By: Tia Levings
- Narrated by: Tia Levings
- Length: 10 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Recruited into the fundamentalist Quiverfull movement as a young wife, Tia Levings learned that being a good Christian meant following a list of additional life principles—a series of secret, special rules to obey. Being a godly and submissive wife in Christian Patriarchy included strict discipline, isolation, and an alternative lifestyle that appeared wholesome to outsiders. Women were to be silent, “keepers of the home.” A Well-Trained Wife is an unforgettable memoir about a woman's race to save herself and her family and details the ways that extreme views can manifest in a marriage.
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A review from a chronic non-reviewer
- By T. L. P. on 08-11-24
By: Tia Levings
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The Making of Biblical Womanhood
- How the Subjugation of Women Became Gospel Truth
- By: Beth Allison Barr
- Narrated by: Sarah Zimmerman
- Length: 7 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Biblical womanhood - the belief that God designed women to be submissive wives, virtuous mothers, and joyful homemakers - pervades North American Christianity. From choices about careers to roles in local churches to relationship dynamics, this belief shapes the everyday lives of evangelical women. Yet biblical womanhood isn't biblical, says Baylor University historian Beth Allison Barr. It was born in a series of clearly definable historical moments.
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Fantastic thought provoking book
- By busymom on 04-22-21
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You Are Your Own
- A Reckoning with the Religious Trauma of Evangelical Christianity
- By: Jamie Lee Finch
- Narrated by: Jamie Lee Finch
- Length: 3 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Rooted in her experiences growing up in an evangelical Christian family, Jamie Lee Finch’s You Are Your Own offers an overview of evangelicalism and the painful confusion and anxiety experienced under its demands. Finch explores the mechanisms of trauma and how fundamentalist denominations match the patterns connected with PTSD. She elaborates on the doubt, guilt, fear, and grief that haunt those leaving the evangelical faith and offers an approach to help them recover healthy self-worth and resilience.
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great content.
- By Corey Moore on 11-19-19
By: Jamie Lee Finch
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Ghosted
- An American Story
- By: Nancy French
- Narrated by: Nancy French
- Length: 9 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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A compelling, thought-provoking memoir about Nancy French's journey from her family's mountain roots to success as a ghostwriter, only to be rejected by her party, church, and community. Ghosted by New York Times bestselling author Nancy French is for all who were alienated by those closest to them and left spiritually and politically homeless.
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I Had No Idea This Book Would Be This Good
- By Brian A. on 05-06-24
By: Nancy French
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Star-Spangled Jesus
- Leaving Christian Nationalism and Finding a True Faith
- By: April Ajoy
- Narrated by: April Ajoy
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Social media influencer and podcast host April Ajoy wouldn’t have called herself a Christian Nationalist when she performed her original song “America Say Jesus” on the Jim Bakker show, or when she participated in Jesus Marches across America, or when she posted cringe-worthy videos on YouTube to campaign for Mitt Romney. April just considered herself a good Christian: faithful, Republican, and determined to make America a Christian nation once again.
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Education in Christian Nationalism
- By KM on 04-03-25
By: April Ajoy
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Baptistland
- A Memoir of Abuse, Betrayal, and Transformation
- By: Christa Brown
- Narrated by: Soren McKay
- Length: 12 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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When Christa Brown first spoke out about the sexual abuse she endured in her Texas childhood church, she never imagined it would expose the ethical chasm at the core of the Southern Baptist Convention: male religious leaders so focused on institutional protection that they sacrifice the safety of children. A book about speaking out and speaking up, Baptistland weaves together Christa’s revealing story of hope amid Southern patriarchy and religious fundamentalism.
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It was very boring.
- By Randall Sink on 07-24-24
By: Christa Brown
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Uncultured
- A Memoir
- By: Daniella Mestyanek Young
- Narrated by: Daniella Mestyanek Young
- Length: 13 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Behind the tall, foreboding gates of a commune in Brazil, Daniella Mestyanek Young was raised in the religious cult The Children of God, also known as The Family, as the daughter of high-ranking members. Her great-grandmother donated land for one of The Family’s first communes in Texas. Her mother, at thirteen, was forced to marry the leader and served as his secretary for many years. Beholden to The Family’s strict rules, Daniella suffers physical, emotional, and sexual abuse—masked as godly discipline and divine love—and is forbidden from getting a traditional education.
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Do not recommend the second half
- By Anonymous Reader on 10-02-22
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Unspeakable
- Surviving My Childhood and Finding My Voice
- By: Jessica Willis Fisher
- Narrated by: Jessica Fisher
- Length: 9 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Using the written word as her witness statement, Jessica Willis Fisher tells a lacerating story of finding her voice after two decades of silence and an unforgettable story of risk and faith.
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"Don't tell" culture exposed
- By Angela on 11-03-22
What listeners say about Disobedient Women
Highly rated for:
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- Lilcess
- 07-16-24
Important
Important content that is grievous, infuriating, but hopeful if we learn from the past and move forward with humility.
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-15-24
close to home
Having had some of the same experiences as women in this book it hit close to home. Literally. Beaumont is 30 minutes from where I grew up. it was heartbreaking and validating.
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- Texas user
- 09-05-23
Excellent read
A read recommended by a podcast (wish I could remember which) that truly explains so much about our current climate.
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- David Dominguez
- 11-13-24
Timely & Much Needed
This book should be read by anyone raised in a culture of subordination of women, or by anyone wanting to understand that mindset better, and how to resist and overcome it. Courageous!
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- valski
- 09-22-23
An important Book Worth Reading
I am an African American woman who was raised by a Roman Catholic dad and a United Methodist mom. I was shocked by the information presented in this book. The abuse described in this book is universal. It's going on in religious institutions the world over. I appreciate your bravery for telling your story and those of the victims of abuse. You're going to help a lot of people.
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1 person found this helpful
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- TrulyTaken
- 02-01-24
Powerful!
I couldn’t put this one down. So many of the names, leaders, and movements mentioned were so familiar and the stories of harm and abuse at the hands of church leaders echoed my own. I personally know several of those who bravely shared their experiences with the author and found her reporting extremely well researched and credibly described. This book is an excellent source document for those seeking to understand the #churchtoo movement.
The reader also did an excellent job. Very listenable.
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- Wendy G. Anderson
- 08-09-23
An accurate report of the evangelical meltdown
I lived this. I grew up under the teachings of Bill Gothard and IBLP. My family joined the ATI program in 1992, and I worked at IBLP headquarters in Illinois from 1994 to 1996. My personal diatribe against the evils of rock music, written when I was fully under the influence of Gothard's cult, is printed in "the purple book." (Though I now repudiate it publicly every chance I get.) I know many of the girls whose stories are mentioned, and witnessed many of the events described, in the chapters on IBLP. I am part of the Recovering Grace website team and am one of the volunteers who began receiving stories from survivors in 2011 and subsequent years.
This author has done a fantastic job of researching the downfall of a number of evangelical ministries, ministers, and celebrities over the last decade. It was hard to read both because of the trauma it resurrected and because of the depth of damage that has been done in the name of Christianity. However, I strongly recommend it, as it is a very important part of understanding what has happened to evangelical Christianity over the past 50 years.
Both the author and the narrator did an excellent job of presenting this material, and I hope that mainstream Christianity will pay attention. I wish I thought that the evangelical world would pay attention, as the answer to their constant lament of "why are people leaving the church" and "why are we losing our young people" is given in these stories. But I fear the evangelical world won't listen. They will just continue building their fortifications taller and stronger while doing their utmost to discredit those who are trying to tell them that their fruit is rotten.
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- Andie
- 08-25-23
A must listen for Pastors and leaders.
Failure to lead with integrity, wisdom and God’s holy and authentic love for others, will produce “bad fruit.” Listening, I was not prepared for the way it inspired me to contemplate the many ways we can fail to fully comprehend the stories of abuse and the multi generational impact. We need to know how abuse by leaders is compounded by a lack of accountability.
Additionally, I felt privileged to hear the stories of so many who have been brave enough to give their accounts over and over with holy hope in a future where protecting the abuser will be unheard of, accountability will be swift and truth openly revealed.
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- Jess Meissner-Dillow
- 05-21-24
Excellently researched
While I don't agree with the author's viewpoints on everything, she has dug deep and done hard work to uncover the truth of dark secrets and systemic problems that need more light. I highly recommend.
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- bliss1221
- 06-10-24
"Disobedient Women" by Sarah Stankorb is an electrifying and inspiring listen. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
"Disobedient Women" by Sarah Stankorb is an electrifying and inspiring listen. The gripping narratives of courageous women who defy societal norms are brought to life with exceptional narration. Stankorb skillfully combines personal stories with historical context, creating a compelling and educational tapestry. This book is a powerful reminder of the strength found in disobedience and the impact of challenging injustice. Perfect for anyone seeking inspiration or a deeper understanding of the feminist movement, "Disobedient Women" is a must-listen that will resonate long after the final chapter.
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