
A Well-Trained Wife
My Escape from Christian Patriarchy
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Narrated by:
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Tia Levings
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By:
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Tia Levings
About this listen
This gripping audiobook is a strong choice alongside books about high-demand religion, overcoming odds, and finding inner strength in impossible situations."—Booklist (Starred Review)
This program is read by the author.
“Today it hit me when he hit me, blood shaking in my brain. Maybe there wasn’t a savior coming. Maybe it was up to me to save me.”
Recruited into the fundamentalist Quiverfull movement as a young wife, Tia Levings learned that being a good Christian meant following a list of additional life principles—a series of secret, special rules to obey. Being a godly and submissive wife in Christian Patriarchy included strict discipline, isolation, and an alternative lifestyle that appeared wholesome to outsiders. Women were to be silent, “keepers of the home.”
Tia knew that to their neighbors her family was strange, but she also couldn't risk exposing their secret lifestyle to police, doctors, teachers, or anyone outside of their church. Christians were called in scripture to be “in the world, not of it.” So, she hid in plain sight as years of abuse and pain followed. When Tia realized she was the only one who could protect her children from becoming the next generation of patriarchal men and submissive women, she began to resist and question how they lived. But in the patriarchy, a woman with opinions is in danger, and eventually, Tia faced an urgent and extreme choice: stay and face dire consequences, or flee with her children.
Told in a beautiful, honest, and sometimes harrowing voice, A Well-Trained Wife is an unforgettable and timely memoir about a woman's race to save herself and her family and details the ways that extreme views can manifest in a marriage.
A Macmillan Audio production from St. Martin’s Press.
©2024 Tia Levings (P)2024 Macmillan AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“In this brave memoir on domestic violence within Christian patriarchy, Tia Levings vulnerably shares her story of survival. With devastating detail, she reveals the many shades of abuse that happen within the world of evangelicalism, a world that was supposed to protect her. The many women who have walked this path from oppression to freedom will find solidarity in these pages.”—Cait West, author of Rift
"I've never given a book a standing ovation until this one. A Well-Trained Wife is a prayer, for all of us. The world is lucky Tia Levings found her freedom and her voice. A reckoning for those who sanction abuse in the name of salvation."—Ashleigh Renard, author of Swing
"With unflinching honesty and relentless self-reflection, Levings’ debut memoir is a portrait in courage."—Julie Bogart, author of The Brave Learner and Raising Critical Thinkers
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Story
Behind the tall, foreboding gates of a commune in Brazil, Daniella Mestyanek Young was raised in the religious cult The Children of God, also known as The Family, as the daughter of high-ranking members. Her great-grandmother donated land for one of The Family’s first communes in Texas. Her mother, at thirteen, was forced to marry the leader and served as his secretary for many years. Beholden to The Family’s strict rules, Daniella suffers physical, emotional, and sexual abuse—masked as godly discipline and divine love—and is forbidden from getting a traditional education.
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Do not recommend the second half
- By Anonymous Reader on 10-02-22
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The Exvangelicals
- Loving, Living, and Leaving the White Evangelical Church
- By: Sarah McCammon
- Narrated by: Sarah McCammon
- Length: 8 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Growing up in a deeply evangelical family in the Midwest in the ‘80s and ‘90s, Sarah McCammon was strictly taught to fear God, obey him, and not question the faith. Persistently worried that her gay grandfather would go to hell unless she could reach him, or that her Muslim friend would need to be converted, and that she, too, would go to hell if she did not believe fervently enough, McCammon was a rule-follower. But through it all, she was plagued by fears and deep questions as the belief system she'd been carefully taught clashed with her expanding understanding of the outside world.
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Multiple Reasons
- By Meghan Smith on 03-30-24
By: Sarah McCammon
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Unspeakable
- Surviving My Childhood and Finding My Voice
- By: Jessica Willis Fisher
- Narrated by: Jessica Fisher
- Length: 9 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Using the written word as her witness statement, Jessica Willis Fisher tells a lacerating story of finding her voice after two decades of silence and an unforgettable story of risk and faith.
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"Don't tell" culture exposed
- By Angela on 11-03-22
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The Secret Practice: Eighteen Years on the Dark Side of Yoga
- A Shocking True Story
- By: Joelle Tamraz
- Narrated by: Virtual Voice
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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WINNER Spring 2024 PenCraft Best Book Award - Memoir FINALIST 2024 National Indie Excellence Awards - Relationships FINALIST 2024 Independent Author Network Best Book Awards - True Story HONORABLE MENTION 2024 Readers' Favorite Book Award - Religion/Philosophy His yoga focused on control and manipulation. Until she broke the sequence. The Secret Practice is the shocking true story of Joelle Tamraz's 18-year ordeal under the control of a master manipulator. For fans of Netflix’s Bikram, Tara Westover’s Educated, and Megan Phelps-Roper’s Unfollow. 'Phenomenal.' —Daniella Mestyanek ...
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Well not what I expected
- By Jessie A. on 06-20-25
By: Joelle Tamraz
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Beyond Belief
- My Secret Life Inside Scientology and My Harrowing Escape
- By: Jenna Miscavige Hill
- Narrated by: Sandy Rustin
- Length: 11 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Jenna Miscavige Hill, niece of Church of Scientology leader David Miscavige, was raised as a Scientologist but left the controversial religion in 2005. In Beyond Belief, she shares her true story of life inside the upper ranks of the sect, details her experiences as a member Sea Org - the church's highest ministry - speaks of her "disconnection" from family outside of the organization, and tells the story of her ultimate escape.
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The Despicable Truth Behind Scientology
- By Tim on 02-07-13
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Jesus Land
- A Memoir
- By: Julia Scheeres
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Evans
- Length: 10 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Julia and her adopted brother, David, are 16 years old. Julia is White. David is Black. It is the mid-1980s and their family has just moved to rural Indiana, a landscape of cottonwood trees, trailer parks, and an all-encompassing racism. At home are a distant mother more involved with her church’s missionaries than her own children and a violent father.
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A Story of the Most Un-Christ-like Christians
- By Susie on 01-08-13
By: Julia Scheeres
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The Community
- A Memoir
- By: N. Jamiyla Chisholm
- Narrated by: Karen Chilton
- Length: 6 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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In 1978, when Jamiyla was two years old, her mother, Ummi, quit her job, converted to Islam with her husband, and moved into an exclusive Muslim society in Brooklyn. Once inside the Community, the family was separated by its powerful and charismatic leader, Dwight York, who was hiding behind the name Imam Isa. Instead of the devotional refuge they’d imagined, the Community was a nightmare of controlled abuse and unspeakable secrets. Forty years later, Jamiyla was ready to excavate and understand a past buried in bad dreams, disturbing memories, and inexplicable rage.
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Misleading description
- By Informed Shopper on 06-14-22
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Exvangelical and Beyond
- How American Christianity Went Radical and the Movement That's Fighting Back
- By: Blake Chastain
- Narrated by: Blake Chastain
- Length: 7 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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With the rise of Trumpism, the American evangelical movement has more political influence than ever—yet at the same time, people are leaving Christianity in record numbers. Why are so many people walking away from the right-wing religion they were raised in, and what are they doing to overcome the past? Writer and podcaster Blake Chastain is uniquely positioned to understand this phenomenon. Raised evangelical, he went to a Christian college intending to become a pastor—until he found himself unable to reconcile his faith with the prejudice and even abuse he saw being done in God’s name.
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Great look at White Evangelicalism
- By Matt Gambill on 04-27-25
By: Blake Chastain
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Sex Cult Nun
- Breaking Away from the Children of God, a Wild, Radical Religious Cult
- By: Faith Jones
- Narrated by: Jaime Lamchick
- Length: 13 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Educated meets The Vow in this story of liberation and self-empowerment - an inspiring and stranger-than-fiction memoir of growing up in and breaking free from the Children of God, an oppressive, extremist religious cult.
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An absolute page-turner
- By Lara on 12-03-21
By: Faith Jones
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Don't Call It a Cult
- The Shocking Story of Keith Raniere and the Women of NXIVM
- By: Sarah Berman
- Narrated by: Ewa Wolniczek
- Length: 10 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Investigative journalist Sarah Berman explores the shocking practices of NXIVM, a cult run by Keith Raniere and many enablers. Through the accounts of central NXIVM figures, Berman uncovers how dozens of women seeking creative coaching and networking opportunities instead were blackmailed, literally branded, near-starved, and enslaved. Don't Call It a Cult is a riveting account of NXIVM's rise to power, its ability to evade prosecution for decades, and the investigation that finally revealed its dark secrets to the world.
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Detailed (best for those already interested)
- By JR on 05-02-21
By: Sarah Berman
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Disobedient Women
- How a Small Group of Faithful Women Exposed Abuse, Brought Down Powerful Pastors, and Ignited an Evangelical Reckoning
- By: Sarah Stankorb
- Narrated by: Suehyla Young
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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In this national bestseller, journalist Sarah Stankorb outlines how access to the internet—its networks, freedom of expression, and resources for deeply researching and reporting on powerful church figures—allowed women to begin dismantling the false authority of evangelical communities that had long demanded their submission.
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To many generalizations without balance
- By Lisa N. on 05-28-24
By: Sarah Stankorb
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A Billion Years
- My Escape from a Life in the Highest Ranks of Scientology
- By: Mike Rinder
- Narrated by: Mike Rinder
- Length: 14 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Mike Rinder’s parents began taking him to their local Scientology center when he was five years old. After high school, he signed a billion-year contract and was admitted into Scientology’s elite inner circle, the Sea Organization. Brought to founder L. Ron Hubbard’s yacht and promised training in Hubbard’s most advanced techniques, Rinder was instead put to work swabbing the decks. Still, Rinder bought into the doctrine that his personal comfort was secondary to the higher purpose of Hubbard’s world-saving mission.
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From a former SO Child
- By Chantal on 09-29-22
By: Mike Rinder
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When Religion Hurts You
- Healing from Religious Trauma and the Impact of High-Control Religion
- By: Laura E. Anderson PhD
- Narrated by: Laura E. Anderson PhD
- Length: 6 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Dr. Laura Anderson takes an honest look at a side of religion that few like to talk about. Drawing from her own life and therapy practice, she helps listeners understand what religious trauma is and isn't, and how high-control churches can be harmful and abusive, often resulting in trauma. She shows how elements of fundamentalist church life—such as fear of hell, purity culture, corporal punishment, and authoritarian leaders—can cause psychological, relational, physical, and spiritual damage.
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Harmed by Church of Christ beliefs
- By Bryan Wade on 04-14-24
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Breaking Free
- How I Escaped Polygamy, the FLDS Cult, and My Father, Warren Jeffs
- By: Rachel Jeffs
- Narrated by: Rachel Jeffs
- Length: 8 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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In this searing memoir of survival in the spirit of Stolen Innocence, the daughter of Warren Jeffs, the self-proclaimed Prophet of the FLDS Church, takes you deep inside the secretive polygamist Mormon fundamentalist cult run by her family and how she escaped it. Born into the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, Rachel Jeffs was raised in a strict patriarchal culture defined by subordinate sister wives and men they must obey.
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Heart breaking addition to the FLDS cult story
- By Abby Martin on 12-10-17
By: Rachel Jeffs
Knew it would be great - didn’t realize how great!
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Gripping, Searing, Hopeful and Healing
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Incredible look behind the curtains of Christian Patriarchy
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The truth
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Amazing Experience
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Powerful and empowering
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Fabulous
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Great listen!
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Amazing!
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I came upon this book by way of instagram, more specifically one post that one friend shared. That one share led me to download this book in the middle of the night, when I should have been sleeping. It brought up a lot of memories and emotions, but also gave me a much needed cry. It’s one of few books I’ll be buying a physical copy of as well, and I’m happy to contribute to Tia’s travel fund while doing so.
Wow
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