
Everybody Wants to Rule the World Except Me
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Narrated by:
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Jeanette Illidge
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By:
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Django Wexler
About this listen
Dark Lord Davi rules the kingdom, but she must now break the time loop that binds her in this hilariously bloody conclusion to the Dark Lord Davi duology.
After countless failures (let’s not dwell on it), Davi has finally saved the kingdom from evil–by becoming the Dark Lord herself. But now, the hordes of wilders are at her command, and they still want blood. Human blood. And Davi’s not sure she can commit to the total extermination of humanity.
With restless armies at her doorstep, a treasonous duke scheming for power, and the legend of an ancient magician looming over her shoulder, Davi must find a way towards peace and uncover the truth behind her time loop if she is to bring harmony to the kingdom. Also, her girlfriend is mad at her. So, there’s that too.
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Story
Sam Wynbrook was a nobody—a shy pizza baker with gaming skills and zero life prospects, until alien warriors hijacked Earth to host their brutal championship: SLAYER BOWL. Armed with two trusty pizza cutters, a potted basil plant, and an attitude problem, Sam must hack, slash, and smart-mouth his way through legions of savage monsters in a cosmic tournament broadcast to trillions.
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Stupidly Entertaining!
- By Ben Winter on 05-30-25
By: Kevin Johnson
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The Fireborne Blade
- By: Charlotte Bond
- Narrated by: Helen McAlpine
- Length: 4 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Maddileh is a knight. There aren’t many women in her line of work, and it often feels like the sneering and contempt from her peers is harder to stomach than the actual dragon slaying. But she’s a knight, and made of sterner stuff. A minor infraction forces her to redeem her honor in the most dramatic way possible, she must retrieve the fabled Fireborne Blade from its keeper, legendary dragon the White Lady, or die trying. If history tells us anything, it's that “die trying” is where to wager your coin.
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The entire story
- By Anonymous User on 05-02-25
By: Charlotte Bond
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Liches Get Stitches
- Liches Get Stitches, Book 1
- By: HJ Tolson
- Narrated by: Ella Lynch
- Length: 8 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Busy with troubles of her own, Maud the village witch just wants to be left alone. Peace and quiet should be easy enough when you're dead, right? Wrong. Reborn as a powerful lich, Maud is suddenly faced with the attentions of all the righteous heroes, holy clerics, and nosy neighbors of the realm. Now, instead of whiling away the days in her garden with her cat and her knitting, Maud must figure out how much force is required to crush a man's spine, the proper storage solution to keep a spoiling cadaver, and how best to display the remains of the fallen for maximum scare.
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Leveling up in a cheery British accent
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 09-08-23
By: HJ Tolson
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The Incandescent
- By: Emily Tesh
- Narrated by: Zara Ramm
- Length: 12 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Walden is good at her job—no, Walden is great at her job. But demons are masters of manipulation. It’s her responsibility to keep her school with its six hundred students and centuries-old legacy safe. And it’s possible the entity Walden most needs to keep her school safe from—is herself.
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My favorite book of the year
- By lsrygl on 05-15-25
By: Emily Tesh
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When Devils Sing
- By: Xan Kaur
- Narrated by: Jennifer Pickens, Landon Woodson, Michael Crouch, and others
- Length: 12 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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When Dawson Sumter goes missing, all he leaves behind is a smattering of blood in room 4 of the debt-ridden motel owned by Neera Singh's family. Disappearances like this aren't uncommon in the rural Georgia town of Carrion, especially every thirteen years when a periodical cicada brood returns from underground, shrieking their deafening screams. For Neera, Dawson is another reminder that in this corner of the South, the rich only get richer, and the poor—well, nothing good comes their way.
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Very well paced and performed!
- By Amanda Ball on 06-10-25
By: Xan Kaur
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Blood and Lies
- Agent of the Throne: Warhammer 40,000, Book 1
- By: John French
- Narrated by: Colleen Prendergast, Steve Conlin, Cliff Chapman, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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For Ianthe, war is all too familiar. A former soldier in the Astra Militarum, she now serves Inquisitor Covenant as an agent of the Throne. Her first mission sees her investigating a cult called the Children of Eternity. Falling foul of the local Enforcers, Ianthe soon learns that war in the shadows is seldom straightforward and that the local, angry law-keepers are the least of her troubles.
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Good little short story
- By WELSBERN on 04-06-21
By: John French
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The Unmarked Witch
- By: Miranda Lyn
- Narrated by: Jacci Prior
- Length: 13 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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A land where witches wear their spells like tattoos is no place for a woman without a single magical mark—except for Raven, whose unblemished skin contradicts the truth of her power. Surviving under the scowls of her fellow witches has carved indelible scars into her mind over the years—just as the day she watched the Dark King's men murder her grandmother in cold blood. But the Dark King's reign of terror is far-reaching, and Raven's grandmother won't be the last witch to die under his rule.
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Not Like Other Girls
- By OnlyPaid ReviewsStay on 10-04-22
By: Miranda Lyn
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Cursed
- Court of Isles, Book 1
- By: Gina LaManna
- Narrated by: Emily Norman
- Length: 8 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Alessia “Allie” Wells is a woman of science. She doesn’t believe in things like werewolves and vampires, sparkly or otherwise. Until her wedding day, when a darkly alluring man appears and kidnaps her in the middle of her glamorous Upper East Side nuptials, whisking her away to a magical island. As the weeks pass, Alessia struggles to accept this new world—an enchanting land rife with fascinating creatures—and her place in it. She soon learns of the curse that is holding her new island captive…and killing everyone on it.
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the story
- By tarra babin on 03-15-25
By: Gina LaManna
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The Helm of Midnight
- The Five Penalties, Book 1
- By: Marina Lostetter
- Narrated by: Nicholas Khan, Shala Nyx, Vera Chok
- Length: 22 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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In a daring and deadly heist, thieves have made away with an artifact of terrible power - the death mask of Louis Charbon. Made by a master craftsman, it is imbued with the spirit of a monster from history, a serial murderer who terrorized the city. Now Charbon is loose once more, killing from beyond the grave. But these murders are different from before, not simply random but the work of a deliberate mind probing for answers to a sinister question.
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Slow and convoluted
- By GTR on 04-28-21
By: Marina Lostetter
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Beta Vulgaris
- A Novel
- By: Margie Sarsfield
- Narrated by: Ellen Archer
- Length: 8 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Elise and her boyfriend, Tom, set off for Minnesota, hoping the paycheck from the sugar beet harvest will cover the rent on their Brooklyn apartment. Amidst the grueling work and familiar anxieties about her finances, Elise starts noticing strange things: threatening phone calls, a mysterious rash, and snatches of an ominous voice coming from the beet pile. When Tom and other coworkers begin to vanish, Elise is left alone to confront the weight of her past, the horrors of her uncertain future, and the menacing but enticing siren song of the beets.
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The awful personality of the main character.
- By Gina Q. on 02-16-25
By: Margie Sarsfield
ITS AMAZING I LOVE I LOVE I LOVE
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So good!!!
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It felt like they were "back on their bullshit," even when they were having moments of growth and trying to do better. We get a great conclusion, but the ending wasn’t graceful, leaving me wanting more and not in the "leave room for mystery" sense, but in a way that felt unfinished.
That said, the overall premise, story, and character dynamics fill in the holes for me. This book, along with the first, has inspired me to explore more of the author’s work. If you’re reading this, I still recommend giving this book a listen.
I appreciate it for what it is
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