
Two Necromancers, a Bureaucrat, and an Army of Golems
An Unconventional Heroes Publisher's Pack
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Narrated by:
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Fred Berman
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By:
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L. G. Estrella
About this listen
Contains Books 1 and 2 of the Unconventional Heroes series.
Two Necromancers, a Bureaucrat, and an Elf, book 1:
Two necromancers, a bureaucrat, and an elf - it sounds like the start of a bad joke, only the joke is on Timmy.
Timothy Walter Bolton - better known as Timmy - has spent most of his life as a necromancer. When he isn't terrorising his enemies, he's plotting inside his castle, which is built on top of lightless chasms filled with nameless horrors and beings of a generally malevolent and megalomaniacal nature. But after one of his latest creations, a zombie hydra-dragon-bear, tries to eat him, he decides that maybe it's time to find a new, less dangerous, career.
But that's easier said than done. He's a wanted criminal with no shortage of powerful (and crazy) enemies, and he has a bone or two to pick with the Everton Council of Mages.
It's a good thing that he's got some help: an obnoxious 10-year-old apprentice who thinks that pink glasses are appropriate for a budding necromancer and a bumbling bureaucrat who may or may not make it through their first real fight without puking his guts up. Wonderful.
Two Necromancers, an Army of Golems, and a Demon Lord, book 2:
Two necromancers, an army of golems, and a demon lord - it sounds like a recipe for trouble, and for Timmy, it definitely is.
To earn his pardon and avoid horrible torture and/or gruesome execution, Timmy has to complete every mission the Council throws his way, most of which seem to involve extremely scary things trying to kill him. At least he’s got help - sort of. His help consists of an apprentice with designs on his castle (and her plans may or may not involve overthrowing him), a bureaucrat whose two greatest skills are fainting in the face of trouble and using people (usually Timmy) as human shields, and an elf with the world's worst case of pyromania and enough magic to level a mountain.
Somehow, Timmy's got to get this bunch of unconventional heroes to work together. Trouble is coming, and it's trouble of the kind that only a necromancer like Timmy could possibly find himself in the middle of.
©2014 L. G. Estrella (P)2020 Podium AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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By: Drew Hayes
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Accidental War Mage: A Steampunk Military Fantasy
- Accidental War Mage, Book 1
- By: Tomas J. McIntee
- Narrated by: Jay Aaseng
- Length: 13 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Hailing from a rural village, Mikolai was an army mechanic with modest ambitions: keep his head down and stay out of trouble. But then he had the misfortune of finding himself in the wrong place at the wrong time . . .Mistaken for a steam knight, Mikolai is drafted into a task force with an intimidating casualty rate led by the notorious war mage known as the Butcher of Belz. Suddenly the unwitting commander of a small squad, the former civilian is tasked with leading his troops into battle to stamp out the resistance in the name of imperial rule.
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great start to a series
- By PluTonyum on 05-09-25
By: Tomas J. McIntee
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Dungeons Just Wanna Have Fun: An Isekai LitRPG
- Dungeons Just Wanna Have Fun, Book 1
- By: Christopher Hall, Maxlex
- Narrated by: Rachel Leblang
- Length: 14 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Being a small dungeon on the outskirts of town in the backwaters of an unimportant kingdom isn't easy, but Kelsey's done her best to level up and become the best dungeon she can be: Digging a hole of ever-increasing depth and complexity. Creating an undead atmosphere that would make a necromancer proud. Spawning monsters and treasure. Killing adventurers. But lately, things have gotten a bit stale.
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Ok with some flaws
- By Roy on 04-24-24
By: Christopher Hall, and others
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Rivals! Frenemies Who Changed the World
- By: Scott McCormick
- Narrated by: Prentice Onayemi, Samantha Turret, Khristine Hvam, and others
- Length: 2 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Did you know that most of our dinosaur fossils were discovered because two grown men absolutely hated each other? It’s true! Rivals! Frenemies Who Changed the World is a riotous audio exclusive, like if Monty Python taught your history class. Each volume of four 30-minute histories will dig into the petty name-calling and grumbling grudges that led to many of the world’s greatest advancements, all delivered with a cheeky sense of humor. Choose sides: Cope or Marsh, the jerks who discovered so many dinosaurs; Hamilton or Burr, whose rivalry fueled American politics; and many more....
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Warning for parents...
- By Jetjaguar15 on 07-08-19
By: Scott McCormick
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NPCs
- By: Drew Hayes
- Narrated by: Roger Wayne
- Length: 7 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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What happens when the haggling is done and the shops are closed? When the quest has been given, the steeds saddled, and the adventurers are off to their next encounter? They keep the world running, the food cooked, and the horses shoed, yet what adventurer has ever spared a thought or concern for the Non-Player Characters? In the town of Maplebark, four such NPCs settle in for a night of actively ignoring the adventurers drinking in the tavern when things go quickly and fatally awry.
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Enjoyable if you manage your expectations
- By Miachi on 01-23-15
By: Drew Hayes
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Forging Hephaestus
- Villains' Code Series, Book 1
- By: Drew Hayes
- Narrated by: Amy Landon
- Length: 26 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Gifted with meta-human powers, Tori Rivas kept away from the limelight, preferring to work as a thief in the shadows. But when she's captured trying to rob a vault that belongs to a secret guild of villains, she's offered a hard choice: prove she has what it takes to join them or be eliminated. Apprenticed to one of the world's most powerful (and supposedly dead) villains, she is thrust into a strange world where the lines that divide superheroes and criminals are more complex than they seem.
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A Nice Surprise with some Really Fun Characters
- By Small Mountain on 09-29-17
By: Drew Hayes
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The Squire
- Blood of Kings, Book 1
- By: Duncan M. Hamilton
- Narrated by: John Lee
- Length: 13 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Conrad lives a quiet rural life with his parents in the Northlands. During one fated night, his world is turned on its head, as nightmares become reality. While his Northlands blood cries out for revenge, Conrad’s head tells him surviving is the best he can do. Rescued by a motley band of mercenaries, Conrad embarks on a life he could barely have imagined. As new challenges, friends, and enemies present themselves, Conrad knows that one day he will have to face the evil that so altered his life, and when that day comes, he must be ready.
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Similar Feel to Wolf of North + Society of Sword
- By Samuel Hudnet on 05-01-21
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Paranormal Real Estate
- Dirk Cooper, Book 1
- By: Matthew Howry
- Narrated by: Scott Aiello
- Length: 9 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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The problems in Dirk Cooper's life were ghosts, money and the Mob. The solution was real estate. Join notable hobo Dirk Cooper as he lies, cheats and steals his way through life, desperate to recover the things he lost during the housing crash of 2008. When he is approached by a wealthy and powerful man with haunted houses to sell, Dirk thinks his troubles are over. Things are not as they seemed, however, and soon he is caught up in a web of dark magic and danger the likes of which he has never encountered before.
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really refreshing, can't wait for more
- By riley on 05-13-22
By: Matthew Howry
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Oh, Great! I Was Reincarnated as a Farmer
- By: Benjamin Kerei
- Narrated by: Travis Baldree
- Length: 17 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Accidentally murdered by a cleric in another universe during a botched resurrection, Arnold, a semi-pro gamer, wakes upon an altar to find himself incarnated into the overweight body of a farmer who could have been his fatter twin. He’s not the hero. He’s not the villain. He’s certainly not the chosen one who is there to save the world. He’s a clerical error. It could be a bad joke, but apparently, it happens so often that they have a standard procedure for returning you.
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Not bad, but not as good as the hype suggests.
- By Christopher on 09-20-21
By: Benjamin Kerei
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The Dungeon That Walks Like a Man
- A LitRPG Yagacore Adventure (Mimic Dungeon, Book 1)
- By: Alex Raizman
- Narrated by: Sierra Kline
- Length: 15 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Zaria was just a normal woman, living a simple life—until demons burst through her door and ate her heart. Reborn from tragedy, Zaria rises from the ashes as a Core, but with a twist. A rare mutation has turned her into a Mutant Core, destined to explode unless she forms a bond with a human witch to become a Striga. Her mutation? Legs. With the power of a full dungeon compressed into a walking house that is her body, Zaria sets out on a journey to find her Striga and avoid detonation. Along the way, she battles demons, builds her dungeon, and feeds her mimic mobs.
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I just wanted to read a dungeon core book.
- By Guy on 12-14-23
By: Alex Raizman
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The Mayor of Noobtown
- Noobtown, Book 1
- By: Ryan Rimmel
- Narrated by: Johnathan McClain
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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After dying and being reborn into a world that's built like a video game, Jim has found himself stuck in a very old-world style new-player zone for low-level adventurers. Unfortunately, the zone fell out of use centuries ago, and no one told the monsters they were supposed to take it easy on the Noobs. Even worse, the only new player around is Jim. Jim has been given an opportunity, and he'll do his best to take advantage of it.
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Like the land but actually finishes story lines.
- By Kaz on 09-03-19
By: Ryan Rimmel
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Jake's Magical Market
- By: J.R. Mathews
- Narrated by: Travis Baldree
- Length: 20 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Jake is working at the neighborhood market under his apartment when the world ends. He expected nuclear war, a computer virus, or even climate change burning everyone to a crisp to bring about the downfall of civilization. But cruel and arbitrary gods from another world? Who would have guessed that? When these cruel gods shuffled Earth like a deck of cards, nothing was in the same place anymore. Monsters, dungeons, and magical items appear scattered across the globe. And suddenly, everyone has access to a new, strange magical card system that gives them magical powers.
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Lots of 5 star reviews
- By Noah M on 01-09-22
By: J.R. Mathews
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Mimic & Me
- By: Cassius Lange, Ryan Tang
- Narrated by: Ryan H. Reid, Dorrie Sacks, Jeff Hays
- Length: 16 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Betrayed and left for dead by a group of slaving nobles, he thought there was nothing left but to bleed out as he counted the number of bricks on the ceiling. But fate had other plans.
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loved the narration. The story is OK, but
- By Michael Wilson on 08-18-23
By: Cassius Lange, and others
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Wizard for Hire
- By: Obert Skye
- Narrated by: Kirby Heyborne
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Fourteen-year-old Ozzy lives near Portland, Oregon, and is desperate for help. His scientist parents have been kidnapped after discovering a formula that enables mind control. Their work was so top secret that Ozzy is afraid to go to the police, but without help, he fears he'll never find his parents. Then he stumbles across a classified ad in the local newspaper that says "Wizard for Hire. Call 555-SPEL." Ozzy has read about wizards in books like Harry Potter, but wizards couldn't exist today, could they? After Ozzy meets the wizard Labyrinth - a.k.a. Rin - he's even more skeptical.
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Good Story
- By LizzyD629 on 09-12-20
By: Obert Skye
A large part of what makes the story entertaining is the parental/humorous tone, off beat world, and interesting characterization. It has a slice of life feel which I found to be a good change of pace from similar stories. Also there is a decent amount of meat on the bone as book 3 is ~15 hours and is quality as well.
The main gripes I had with the book are that the dialogue and character behavior can be repetitive. For instance, there seems to be a reference to how awful Timmy's old master was about every hour. Also the voice of Katie by Fred Berman I found grating. Despite these criticisms, I highly recommend this book. A publisher's pack done right!
Excellent Compilation: Publisher's Pack Done Right
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Love these 2 Necromancers
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Silly, popcorn comedy fantasy
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Entertaining
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extreme enjoyable
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Quirky story
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book amazing!
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Very enjoyable listen
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it's not gonna change your view of the world or make you think, but this book will be a better way to spend your time than most shows on TV these days.
Fred Berman has a wide variety of voices and keep them both consist and destinct. he was a joy to listen to
a great comedy with better characters
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The funny side of necromancy.
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