How to Be Alone
If You Want to, and Even If You Don't
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Narrated by:
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Lane Moore
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By:
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Lane Moore
About this listen
The former sex and relationships editor for Cosmopolitan and host of the wildly popular comedy show Tinder Live with Lane Moore presents her poignant, funny, and deeply moving first audiobook.
Lane Moore is a rare performer who is as impressive onstage - whether hosting her iconic show Tinder Live or being the enigmatic front woman of It Was Romance - as she is on the page, as both a former writer for The Onion and an award-winning sex and relationships editor for Cosmopolitan. But her story has had its obstacles, including being her own parent, living in her car as a teenager, and moving to New York City to pursue her dreams. Through it all, she looked to movies, TV, and music as the family and support systems she never had.
From spending the holidays alone to having better “stranger luck” than with those closest to her to feeling like the last hopeless romantic on Earth, Lane reveals her powerful and entertaining journey in all its candor, anxiety, and ultimate acceptance - with humor always her bolstering force and greatest gift.
How to Be Alone is a must-listen for anyone whose childhood still feels unresolved, who spends more time pretending to have friends online than feeling close to anyone in real life, who tries to have genuine, deep conversations in a roomful of people who would rather you not. Above all, it’s an audiobook for anyone who desperately wants to feel less alone and a little more connected through listening to her words.
©2018 Lane Moore. All rights reserved. (P)2018 Simon & Schuster, Inc. All rights reserved.Listeners also enjoyed...
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Story
Wildflower is a portrait of Drew's life in stories as she looks back on the adventures, challenges, and incredible experiences of her earlier years. It includes tales of living on her own at 14 (and how laundry may have saved her life), getting stuck in a gas station overhang on a cross-country road trip, saying good-bye to her father in a way only he could have understood, and many more adventures and lessons that have led her to the successful, happy, and healthy place she is today.
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Hold the shrieking !
- By Dawne on 11-27-15
By: Drew Barrymore
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Dirty Thirty
- By: Asa Akira
- Narrated by: Veronica Worthington
- Length: 5 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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As she contemplates turning 30 years old while still being in the adult film trade, Asa Akira, author of the best-seller Insatiable, delves into her past, present, and future, exploring the events that brought her to where she is now and the surprising and insightful plans she has for her future. Internationally known as a porn star, Akira's perceptive, funny, and straightforward writings on love, sex, death, marriage, and celebrity come together in a surprising book of essays.
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this was fun I'm going to buy her other book 2
- By Sir Lawrence on 01-09-19
By: Asa Akira
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Miss Fortune
- Fresh Perspectives on Having It All from Someone Who Is Not Okay
- By: Lauren Weedman
- Narrated by: Lauren Weedman
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Lauren Weedman is not okay. She's living what should be the good life in sunny Los Angeles. After a gig as a correspondent with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, she scored parts in blockbuster movies, which led to memorable recurring roles on HBO's Hung and Looking. She had a loving husband and an adorable baby boy. In these comedic essays, she turns a piercingly observant, darkly funny lens on the ways her life is actually not okay.
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Good
- By Ajules29 on 04-02-16
By: Lauren Weedman
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Sober Stick Figure
- A Memoir
- By: Amber Tozer
- Narrated by: Amber Tozer
- Length: 5 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Sober Stick Figure is a memoir from stand-up comedian Amber Tozer, chronicling her life as an alcoholic - starting with her first drink at the age of seven - and her eventual recovery. Amber writes about the crazy and harsh truths of being raised by alcoholics, becoming one herself, stagnating in denial for years, and finally getting sober.
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Author's voice unbearable
- By Kylee on 12-09-16
By: Amber Tozer
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Idiots
- Marriage, Motherhood, Milk & Mistakes
- By: Laura Clery
- Narrated by: Laura Clery
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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A fresh, hilarious, and relatable collection of essays about everything from motherhood and marriage to sobriety and work-life balance (or imbalance) from the nationally bestselling author of the “honest, complicated” (SheKnows) Idiot.
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Tears and laughs!!
- By Anonymous User on 04-07-22
By: Laura Clery
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The Todd Glass Situation
- A Bunch of Lies about My Personal Life and a Bunch of True Stories about My 30-Year Career in Standup Comedy
- By: Todd Glass, Jonathan Grotenstein
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
- Length: 6 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Growing up in a Philadelphia suburb in the 1970s was an easy life. Well, easy as long as you didn't have dyslexia or ADD, or were a Jew. And once you added gay into the mix, life became more difficult. So Todd Glass decided to hide the gay part, no matter how comic, tragic, or comically tragic the results. Now, Todd has written an open, honest, and hilarious memoir in an effort to help everyone - young and old, gay and straight - breathe a little more freely.
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Worth It
- By Heather on 11-17-14
By: Todd Glass, and others
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Dear Girls Above Me
- Inspired by a True Story
- By: Charles McDowell
- Narrated by: Kirby Heyborne
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
When Charlie McDowell began sharing his open letters to his noisy upstairs neighbors - two impossibly ditzy female roommates in their mid-twenties - on Twitter, his feed quickly went viral. His followers multiplied and he got the attention of everyone from celebrities to production studios to major media outlets such as Time and Glamour.
Now Dear Girls breaks out of the 140-character limit as Charlie imagines what would happen if he put the wisdom of the girls to the test.
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An Enjoyable Listen
- By Elle W on 11-05-13
By: Charles McDowell
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Hey Mom
- By: Louie Anderson
- Narrated by: Louie Anderson
- Length: 6 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
Louie Anderson has been channeling his beloved mom in his iconic stand-up comedy for decades - but she passed away before getting to see him reach new heights with his breakout role. Hey Mom is Louie's way of catching Ora Zella Anderson up on everything that has been going on in his life, including his continued struggles with food and family, but also how so much has changed for the better. He also has plenty of laugh-out-loud stories about his incredibly resilient mother and his 10 siblings, as well as observations on the absurdities of life.
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I love Louie even more now
- By Candace on 05-02-18
By: Louie Anderson
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Has Anyone Seen My Pants?
- By: Sarah Colonna
- Narrated by: Sarah Colonna
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Has Anyone Seen My Pants? is a laugh-out-loud trip around America (and Mexico!) with Sarah as she braves crying in nail salons, mother-daughter road trips, Iowan casinos, and single-shaming resorts. From a fling-gone-wrong to friend breakups and a new romance, Sarah's signature wit and sharp observations take you on a journey at once so deviously funny and surprisingly compassionate that it might just steal your heart - not to mention your pants.
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clearance shelf material
- By lisa martinez on 04-28-15
By: Sarah Colonna
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Bare Bones
- I'm Not Lonely If You're Reading This Book
- By: Bobby Bones
- Narrated by: Bobby Bones
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
Growing up poor in Mountain Pine, Arkansas, with a young, addicted mom, Bobby Estell fell in love with country music. Abandoned by his father at the age of five, Bobby saw the radio as his way out - a dream that came true in college when he went on air at the Henderson State University campus station broadcasting as Bobby Bones while simultaneously starting The Bobby Bones Show at 105.9 KLAZ.
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A look inside the narcissist life of Bobby Bones.
- By Selena on 05-20-16
By: Bobby Bones
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Does This Baby Make Me Look Straight?
- Confessions of a Gay Dad
- By: Dan Bucatinsky
- Narrated by: Dan Bucatinsky
- Length: 5 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In 2005, Dan Bucatinsky and his partner, Don Roos, found themselves in an L.A. delivery room, decked out in disposable scrubs from shower cap to booties, to welcome their adopted baby girl - launching their frantic yet memorable adventures into fatherhood. Two and a half years later, the same birth mother - a heroically generous, pack-a-day teen with a passion for Bridezilla marathons and Mountain Dew - delivered a son into the couple’s arms.
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A Parenting Book with Humor and Heart
- By The Reading Date on 02-05-14
By: Dan Bucatinsky
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I Can Barely Take Care of Myself
- Tales from a Happy Life Without Kids
- By: Jen Kirkman
- Narrated by: Jen Kirkman
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
"You'll change your mind." That's what everyone says to Jen Kirkman - and countless women like her - when she confesses she doesn't plan to have children. But you know what? It's hard enough to be an adult. You have to dress yourself and pay bills and remember to buy birthday gifts. You have to drive and get annual physicals and tip for good service. Some adults take on the added burden of caring for a tiny human being with no language skills or bladder control.
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Funny. Not fall down laughing funny, but funny
- By david on 05-22-13
By: Jen Kirkman
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The Southern Education of a Jersey Girl
- Adventures in Life and Love in the Heart of Dixie
- By: Jaime Primak Sullivan
- Narrated by: Jaime Primak Sullivan
- Length: 6 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Jaime Primak Sullivan, a Jersey-bred, tough-as-nails PR maven - and unlikely transplant in an upscale suburb of Birmingham, Alabama - has spent her entire life crossing the line: whether she's pushing the boundaries of what proper Southern ladies consider to be "polite behavior" or literally traversing the Mason-Dixon line in the name of love. She isn't afraid to say what everyone is thinking when it comes to love, sex, friendship, and many other topics that are all too often sugar-coated in polite Southern company.
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Awesome book
- By Gwendolyn on 09-23-16
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When it comes to taking action, making good decisions, and cultivating inner peace, there's a unique factor in life that only you can give to yourself.
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Starts on topic then goes off track
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First Edition is Better
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See What I Have Done
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In this riveting debut novel, See What I Have Done, Sarah Schmidt recasts one of the most fascinating murder cases of all time into an intimate story of a volatile household and a family devoid of love. On the morning of August 4, 1892, Lizzie Borden calls out to her maid, "Someone's killed Father." The brutal ax murder of Andrew and Abby Borden in their home in Fall River, Massachusetts, leaves little evidence and many unanswered questions.
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Rambling saved by narrators.
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What listeners say about How to Be Alone
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- jennifer
- 03-28-19
Loved the traditions
I so did my own traditions for a few years even hiked on thanksgiving and found a pair of ray bans sunglasses on my hike solo. You can do your own thing and this book reinforced my own beliefs to keep on trucking .... at your own pace.
Fuck it.
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11 people found this helpful
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- Earthling
- 03-15-19
perfect timing
I found this book on my facebook feed in an audible ad post breakup and getting ready to move out. It's incredibly real and even though I haven't experienced every single thing the author has, I felt like I was listening to someone else tell my story. She puts so many feelings into words that I could not describe over the years. So many internal dialogues secretly had with myself that I thought made me crazy when really, I was just human. This book is raw, honest, and reassuringly human. Thank you Lane Moore.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Not Just A Blonde
- 04-14-21
Never Alone
If you consider yourself normal you’ll hate this book. If you want to be normal more than anything this book will scare you. If you are quirky, a creative, a dreamer, a lover or hopeless romantic... you’ll meet a kindred spirit and never feel completely alone ever again... and you will absolutely LOVE this book!
**Bonus** she SINGS on the audio!!!! Love love love!!!!
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- Anonymous User
- 01-04-19
Not what I expected, but everything I needed
Lane is a great story teller, and I almost wish this book was longer! She has had such an interesting life so far, and had conquered so much. She has quite a way with words, and can be funny, heart wrenching, and relatable all at the same time. You won't regret listening to this!
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- Norma Thomas
- 12-06-18
Definitley into it!
I loved hearing Lane's story. I loved that it was her voice delivering her authentic message & experiences. Her singing voice is incredible! The whole vibe of this message, the way her story is shared to this point in her life & the work she's done to counsel/reckon with it all is so impressive, inspiring & influential to me! I listened all in one day because I was SO into it! Thank you Lane Moore for sharing.
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-19-19
Loved this book!
I am so glad I chose to listen to this book. Her voice was inviting and genuine. You read this book and feel like you know her. I highly recommend this to you if you feel lonely or even if you don’t. If you don’t find yourself feeling alone, it’ll help you be able to see a glimpse into the lives of those around you.
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- mkmdowns
- 06-16-20
This book is a masterpiece
Lane actually shows us how to love our squishy sweet inner selves through her own life story.
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- Austin Aranda
- 12-31-19
Lane is now my friend
The stories that Lane tells are told is such a real and honest way, wether similar things have happened to you or not, you can still relate. I even found myself chuckling a few time or getting a little mushy. It was like a Netflix series I couldn’t stop watching. Great work Lane.
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- KK
- 08-26-21
My heart is full
Lane what an amazing human being you are. How blessed this World is to have you in it. I loved this book and I’m so happy that you are reading it.
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- Jillian
- 07-16-20
Amazing
This is such a powerful book. Inspirational and comforting. Worth it and more. Get it.
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