
I Don't Want to Be the Hero, Vol. 1
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Narrated by:
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Robert Bradvica
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Alyssa Poon
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By:
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M.E. Thorne
About this listen
Beat the Demon Lord and save the world? No thanks!
People always said demons and dragons were horrifying monsters. They didn't warn me they were gorgeous, too.
My name is Mal, and ever since I was a boy, I've been treated as a malcontent because of my ability to see magic. For everyone else, magic is proof of the Goddess’ love. To me, it is just a colorful spread of enchantments, cantrips, blessings, and hexes. And any spell I can see, I can break.
I had always expected to grow up to be a ditch-digger. Instead, I was dubbed a hero. Heroes are sent out in the wasteland, to slay monsters and to challenge the Demon Lord. It’s a suicide mission. But once I was exiled, I found that the outside world was drastically different from what I had thought. The beautiful women I meet, demons, dragons, and orcs, might be my best shot for surviving the insanity I’ve been thrown into.
Warning: This novel is not appropriate for all ages; it contains descriptions of violence, unconventional relationships, and limitless adventure.
©2021 M.E. Thorne (P)2022 Podium AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
After the Watchers of All Worlds choose karate champion and three-time-employee of the month Jason Caulfield to lead the reformed Chroma Corps against the monsters of Lord Evilface, he ends up in charge of four female warriors, each with their own quirks. But his new life isn’t all pizza, karate, friendship, and romantic tension. The monsters he and his fellow rangers face are super dangerous... and super weird. Also, they keep making these horrible puns.
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Spicy next level Power Rangers
- By Tony Loveless on 05-31-25
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
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My Cottage Was Transferred to Another World Omnibus
- Books 1-3: A Slow Life In Another World Light Novel
- By: Sebastian Guzman
- Narrated by: Melisandre Verte, Ron d'Vous
- Length: 37 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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The Hero of Humanity—the man summoned to slay the Demon King—he went and destroyed all who wronged him, humans and gods included. At the end of his bloody campaign, he had nothing left. He retired to a humble cottage built from the divine, wood of the World Tree that he chopped down. All was well until, one day, the world shook. The Hero wanted nothing to do with it and went to sleep. The next day, he went outside and saw that his property had been transferred to yet another world.
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funny but jeez
- By Kindle Customer on 06-13-25
By: Sebastian Guzman
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Goblin Girls Do It Better: The Complete Trilogy
- Goblin Girls Do It Better
- By: Misty Vixen
- Narrated by: Ellory Lane
- Length: 19 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Lucas Mead-Slayer has seen it all. Or at least that's what he thought after over a decade of wandering the wilderness of his homeland and embracing everything it had to throw at him. He's fought terrible monsters, plundered ancient catacombs, and caught the eye of many unique and interesting adventuresses. After arguably the most harrowing situation of his life, Lucas has decided to seek out a friend in her home forest, maybe take a vacation, get away from all the craziness. Only it doesn't work out that way.
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nonsense incarnate
- By Amazon Customer on 05-07-25
By: Misty Vixen
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Primal Imperative: The Complete Trilogy
- By: Quentin Kilgore
- Narrated by: Matt Hicks, Mandy McCollough
- Length: 22 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Awaking on the shores of a primitive world, David discovers a remote village populated almost entirely by women. Powerful witches have killed the men, destroying their tribal society. The women have little defense against the wild beasts and opportunistic goblin slavers who roam their forests. With a mysterious new power raging in his muscles, David becomes their guardian, provider, and leader. Beautiful women flock to him, believing he was sent by a sky god to protect them.
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Good but could've been better
- By Shaquille Evans on 06-07-25
By: Quentin Kilgore
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Slime Keeper
- Slime Keeper, Book 1
- By: Leon West
- Narrated by: Jessica Threet, Tristan Josiah
- Length: 10 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Blake was searching for simplicity, but fate had other plans. After an unexpected turn of events lands him in the fantastical world of Ylege, he's endowed with extraordinary physical abilities and inherits an unclaimed farmstead at the world's edge. Things seem to be falling into place until he encounters the gorls—beautiful, magical, sentient slimes.
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a little over done
- By Thomas rueul dembey on 10-30-24
By: Leon West
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Apocalypse Core: The Complete Trilogy
- By: Jack Porter
- Narrated by: TJ McKenzie, Melanie Hastings
- Length: 23 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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One moment, everything was normal. Then the World Core woke up and slaughtered almost everything alive so it could harvest their Chi. After that, it rebuilt everything and put the survivors in a game-like environment, pitting them against monsters and each other. The rules are different now. Chi power is as important as being able to fight.
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Ummm this is damn near a smut novel
- By C. Curtis on 04-08-23
By: Jack Porter
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Elemental Summoner, Books 1-3
- By: D. Levesque
- Narrated by: Christian J. Gilliland, Hazel Cohen
- Length: 25 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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In a world where magic is real, Alex is about to learn that being shot in the head was only the beginning. God has given him a choice: to take the life of the person meant to die that day and forget who he was, or to keep being Alex and transition to a world of magic where God would give him the tools to survive. Alex, an avid fan of fantasy, chooses the latter and is thrown through a black portal into a world he never could have imagined.
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great narrators sub plot
- By Nathan on 08-01-23
By: D. Levesque
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Monster Masseur: The Complete Trilogy
- By: Virgil Knightley
- Narrated by: Renée Nolen, Trevor Jordan
- Length: 26 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Ryker Hayes is a licensed massage therapist, and a damn good one at that. It's a career he's passionate about, and all his plans for life are on track—until he winds up transported to the world of Werifesteria in the body of an infamous warlord, at least. Now all he really wants to do is forget the misdeeds of his alter ego and retire to a life of anonymity with a couple interesting women as his new partners. Together, they open the very first massage inn and spa in all the land, and take on all the responsibilities that come with it. Turns out, it's a lot of work!
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It was a nice blend
- By IMHottinger on 10-16-24
By: Virgil Knightley
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King of the Goblins Omnibus Edition
- By: Micky Carre
- Narrated by: Robin Shay
- Length: 20 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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An unfortunate accident destroyed my entire world, but the gods saw fit to zap me to a new one, a world filled with fantastical creatures and magic. To say I got a rough start there would be putting it mildly, but fortunately I had the help of Silvy, a beautiful goblin woman who told me I was the answer to her prayers. And she meant that literally.
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written by AI, narrated by a child
- By Robert on 02-27-25
By: Micky Carre
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Hexblade Warlock
- Quintasia Academy, Book 1
- By: Jack Spry, Marcus Sloss
- Narrated by: Richard Brock, Raya Kane
- Length: 17 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Survive. It's all Seven can do. An outcast through no fault of his own, he's forced to work the hardest fields, do the jobs no one else wants to. So, when war comes to his land, he has no qualms enlisting. After all, his life can’t get any harder, can it?
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"You don't own me"...
- By GrimReaperD13 on 09-03-24
By: Jack Spry, and others
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Demi-Beast Husbandry for Fun and Profit
- A Slice-of-Life, Farming and Breeding Harem LitRPG
- By: Peter North
- Narrated by: Lyra Miller
- Length: 16 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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When Benjamin Nickels discovers he's the proud new owner of a derelict hobby farm, inherited from a crazy uncle he's never met, he's too excited to question his good fortune. He tells off his boss, quits his job, and heads out of town to Lucky Nickel Acres.
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Great fun story
- By Kindle Customer on 06-09-25
By: Peter North
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Renegade Ravager Omnibus
- Renegade Ravager
- By: M.E. Thorne
- Narrated by: Christian J. Gilliland, Amber Hartt
- Length: 43 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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My name is James Browning. Not long ago, I was a proud member of the 92nd Legion, the Star Ravagers. We were super-soldiers that defended humanity from aliens, heretics, and otherworldly threats. But a callous betrayal left my legion decimated, erased, and dishonored. I thought I was doomed to spend the rest of my life on a distant penal colony. But when I suddenly find myself stranded in an alien space station, surrounded by the wrecks of lost spaceships, I know I have a chance at escape.
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only made half way through book 1
- By Christopher L Rader on 05-08-25
By: M.E. Thorne
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Battle Mage: Academy for Magical Inmates Omnibus, Books 1-3
- By: Dante King
- Narrated by: Lewis Alexander, Rozelyn Rader
- Length: 29 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Stealing from a mage was both the best and worst thing I had ever done. After being caught, I was named a criminal and sent to a prison known as the Jade Bastion. Located at the Edge of the World, this prison carries a secret. Those inmates who have magical abilities are trained in the most powerful magic known to the empire: battle magic. To survive, I will need to discover a secret I didn't know I possessed. I can become more powerful through bonding with the other beautiful, magically inclined inmates.
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Had a surprising depth of lore by the end.
- By Justin McKnight on 04-12-24
By: Dante King
Its actually pretty good, dang near perfect.
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Awesome
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I was very familiar with the narrators and they did a great job as always.
good begining book
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I put this series off for to long.
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Super funny, outrageous adventure
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What an outstanding start to a series!
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Even better on audio.
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Finally on Audible
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The MC starts off very weak, in EVERY aspect imaginable (granted, he is confident in being lazy), which wouldn't be too terrible if he wasn't "leveling up" in the bedroom more than he was in his skill, abilities, and character development as a whole. The friends he makes along the way, truly carry the story (which is further emphasized by great narrating) as they are common fantasy races, but utilizing completely different classes: Goblin Dragoon Warrior, Orc Plant Spellcaster, Dragon Archer, and a Demon...that's a knight.
The story, itself, is simplistic but well defined. Action scenes are very well written and the dialogue between the companions had me chuckling on several occasions.
Overall, the series has a lot of potential, but can't honestly say if it's worth investing in.
A Typical Story, Written in an Atypical Manner...
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Great LoTR-like
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