
It's Not You
Identifying and Healing from Narcissistic People
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
$0.99/mo for the first 3 months

Buy for $20.25
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Ramani Durvasula PhD
-
Maria Shriver
About this listen
INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER
From clinical psychologist and expert in narcissistic relationships Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a guide to protecting and healing yourself from the daily harms of narcissism
AN OPEN FIELD PUBLICATION FROM MARIA SHRIVER
It’s not always easy to tell when you’re dealing with a narcissist. One day they draw you in with their confidence and charisma, the next they gaslight you, wreck your self-confidence, and leave you wondering, What could I have done differently?
As Dr. Ramani Durvasula reveals in It's Not You, the answer is: absolutely nothing. Just as a tiger can’t change its stripes, a narcissist won’t stop manipulating and invalidating you. To heal in the aftermath of their abuse and protect yourself from future harm, you first have to accept that you are not to blame.
Deeply compassionate and revelatory, It’s Not You examines how narcissists hijack our wellbeing and offers a healing path forward. Drawing on more than 20 years of studying, teaching, and helping clients navigate the landscape of narcissism, Dr. Durvasula unpacks the oft-misunderstood personality, showing how to identify the telltale signs that you may be dealing with a narcissist and protect yourself from their toxic influence. Along the way, you’ll learn how to become gaslight resistant, chip away at the trauma bonds that keep us stuck in these cycles, grieve the losses, create realistic boundaries, learn the fine art of discernment, and recover your sense of self after years of invalidation.
Healing and thriving after or even during a narcissistic relationship can be challenging, but it is possible. It's Not You shows that the first step is to stop trying to change the narcissistic person, stop blaming yourself, and start giving yourself permission to foster your autonomy and sense of self outside of this relationship.
©2024 Ramani Durvasula (P)2024 Penguin AudioListeners also enjoyed...
-
Trauma Bonding: Understanding and Overcoming the Trauma Bond in a Narcissistic Relationship
- Narcissistic Relationship Recovery, Book 1
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 1 hr and 37 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
If you're constantly feeling on edge, forever working to appease your spouse to little avail and feel like you're constantly being chipped away at with their abusive behavior, then I can understand how emotionally shattering it feels to live this way. If, in the same breath, it breaks your heart to even consider leaving them because you can't imagine life without them, then I can understand that feeling too - because I was trauma bonded to my abusive ex.
-
-
Not relevant for everyone dealing with trauma bonding
- By Alesia Braund on 11-18-20
By: Lauren Kozlowski
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go?
- Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist
- By: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Narrated by: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Length: 10 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Should I Stay or Should I Go? is a survival manual, a guidebook, and a shot of reality. Some people will never change, and kissing frogs is the stuff of fairy tales, not real life. The Beast never turns out to be a nice guy (or gal). This is a book that breaks down what mean people do to us, how they do it, and what we can do to survive.
-
-
Wake up call !
- By sashy on 08-18-16
-
What a Narcissist Does at the End of a Relationship
- Dealing with and Understanding the Aftermath of a Narcissistic Relationship
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 1 hr and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Breaking up in normal circumstances is hard enough. If you throw a narcissist into the equation, it makes it all the more difficult. If you're looking to listen to this audiobook, you're likely heartbroken and looking for some guidance, support, or understanding. As someone who has been through the hell of a narcissistic relationship, I can offer you all three, and I hope this audiobook can help you make sense of this heartbreaking time.
-
-
Horrible! Read if you want to become a narcissist!
- By DJ on 01-21-21
By: Lauren Kozlowski
-
Narcissistic Ex
- How to Get Over a Toxic Relationship, Deal With an Abusive Ex and Become Free of the Controlling Sociopath
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 2 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Narcissistic abuse is a form of abuse that ensures victims are left emotionally drained, mentally exhausted, and devoid of any self-worth or self-esteem...ending a relationship with a narcissist isn’t that easy. In this audiobook, I want to offer you some guidance on this rarely-talked about aspect of an abusive relationship: how to deal with a narcissist when they’re your ex.
-
-
thank you so much!!
- By jeff gipson on 12-30-19
By: Lauren Kozlowski
-
The Covert Passive-Aggressive Narcissist
- Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse
- By: Debbie Mirza
- Narrated by: Debbie Mirza
- Length: 6 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse is the most comprehensive and helpful audiobook on the topic of covert narcissism. This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused.
-
-
This book CHANGED MY LIFE!
- By Mojo on 12-19-18
By: Debbie Mirza
-
30 Covert Emotional Manipulation Tactics: How Manipulators Take Control in Personal Relationships
- By: Adelyn Birch
- Narrated by: Kitty Hendrix
- Length: 1 hr and 48 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Identifying covert emotional manipulation is tricky. You sense something is wrong, but you can't quite put your finger on the problem. This powerful book will reveal to you if manipulation is at play in your relationships. It will open your eyes. You will learn 30 tactics manipulators use to get what they want. You will also learn to spot the warning signs within yourself that expose covert manipulation is taking place, even if you can't identify the specific tactics being used.
-
-
This book can change your life!
- By Cat O. on 04-04-18
By: Adelyn Birch
-
Trauma Bonding: Understanding and Overcoming the Trauma Bond in a Narcissistic Relationship
- Narcissistic Relationship Recovery, Book 1
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 1 hr and 37 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
If you're constantly feeling on edge, forever working to appease your spouse to little avail and feel like you're constantly being chipped away at with their abusive behavior, then I can understand how emotionally shattering it feels to live this way. If, in the same breath, it breaks your heart to even consider leaving them because you can't imagine life without them, then I can understand that feeling too - because I was trauma bonded to my abusive ex.
-
-
Not relevant for everyone dealing with trauma bonding
- By Alesia Braund on 11-18-20
By: Lauren Kozlowski
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go?
- Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist
- By: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Narrated by: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Length: 10 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Should I Stay or Should I Go? is a survival manual, a guidebook, and a shot of reality. Some people will never change, and kissing frogs is the stuff of fairy tales, not real life. The Beast never turns out to be a nice guy (or gal). This is a book that breaks down what mean people do to us, how they do it, and what we can do to survive.
-
-
Wake up call !
- By sashy on 08-18-16
-
What a Narcissist Does at the End of a Relationship
- Dealing with and Understanding the Aftermath of a Narcissistic Relationship
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 1 hr and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Breaking up in normal circumstances is hard enough. If you throw a narcissist into the equation, it makes it all the more difficult. If you're looking to listen to this audiobook, you're likely heartbroken and looking for some guidance, support, or understanding. As someone who has been through the hell of a narcissistic relationship, I can offer you all three, and I hope this audiobook can help you make sense of this heartbreaking time.
-
-
Horrible! Read if you want to become a narcissist!
- By DJ on 01-21-21
By: Lauren Kozlowski
-
Narcissistic Ex
- How to Get Over a Toxic Relationship, Deal With an Abusive Ex and Become Free of the Controlling Sociopath
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 2 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Narcissistic abuse is a form of abuse that ensures victims are left emotionally drained, mentally exhausted, and devoid of any self-worth or self-esteem...ending a relationship with a narcissist isn’t that easy. In this audiobook, I want to offer you some guidance on this rarely-talked about aspect of an abusive relationship: how to deal with a narcissist when they’re your ex.
-
-
thank you so much!!
- By jeff gipson on 12-30-19
By: Lauren Kozlowski
-
The Covert Passive-Aggressive Narcissist
- Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse
- By: Debbie Mirza
- Narrated by: Debbie Mirza
- Length: 6 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse is the most comprehensive and helpful audiobook on the topic of covert narcissism. This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused.
-
-
This book CHANGED MY LIFE!
- By Mojo on 12-19-18
By: Debbie Mirza
-
30 Covert Emotional Manipulation Tactics: How Manipulators Take Control in Personal Relationships
- By: Adelyn Birch
- Narrated by: Kitty Hendrix
- Length: 1 hr and 48 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Identifying covert emotional manipulation is tricky. You sense something is wrong, but you can't quite put your finger on the problem. This powerful book will reveal to you if manipulation is at play in your relationships. It will open your eyes. You will learn 30 tactics manipulators use to get what they want. You will also learn to spot the warning signs within yourself that expose covert manipulation is taking place, even if you can't identify the specific tactics being used.
-
-
This book can change your life!
- By Cat O. on 04-04-18
By: Adelyn Birch
-
Why Does He Do That?
- Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
- By: Lundy Bancroft
- Narrated by: Peter Berkrot
- Length: 13 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
He says he loves you. So...why does he do that? You've asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men---and to change your life. In this groundbreaking book, a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men shows you how to improve, survive, or leave an abusive relationship.
-
-
I needed this.
- By james p weiss on 09-07-17
By: Lundy Bancroft
-
Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse, Gaslighting, Codependency and Complex PTSD (4 Books in 1)
- Workbook and Guide to Overcome Trauma, Toxic Relationships, ... and Recover from Unhealthy Relationships)
- By: Linda Hill
- Narrated by: S. L. Albert, Vicky David, Alene Sorensen
- Length: 12 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
This groundbreaking book includes four books that will teach you from start to finish, everything you need to know about Narcissistic Abuse, Gaslighting, Codependency and Complex PTSD, as well as how to recover from each one of them.
-
-
Better understanding and clarity
- By Amber Glover on 02-15-23
By: Linda Hill
-
Start Here: A Crash Course in Understanding, Navigating, and Healing From Narcissistic Abuse
- By: Dana Morningstar
- Narrated by: Dana Morningstar
- Length: 8 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Confusing. Crazy making. Draining. Does this describe your relationship? Do you wonder if they will ever change? Do you want to know why they lie so much...even when the truth would work better? Have you wondered why they never seem to change - no matter how much you are willing to do for them, or how much love, understanding, rehab, religion, therapy, second (or 22nd) chances you’ve given them? If so, you are not alone and this book is a great place to start.
-
-
The best
- By Icebound on 02-13-19
By: Dana Morningstar
-
The Safest Place Possible: A Guide to Healing and Transformation
- By: Debbie Mirza
- Narrated by: Debbie Mirza
- Length: 3 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The Safest Place Possible is a journey to self-love and healing. If you have lost yourself in an unhealthy or traumatic relationship and want to find your way back to who you really are, if you have had the rug pulled out from under you, if you are experiencing anxiety and fear, if you are unsure of your future, this is the book for you. This book is both a memoir as well as an incredibly helpful guide to healing through transforming the relationship you have with yourself.
-
-
So grateful for this book!
- By Sunny on 08-03-19
By: Debbie Mirza
-
If Only I'd Known!
- How to Outsmart Narcissists, Set Guilt-Free Boundaries, and Create Unshakeable Self-Worth
- By: Chelsey Brooke Cole
- Narrated by: Chelsey Brooke Cole
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Narcissistic abuse creates a tidal wave of confusion, hypervigilance, and overthinking. You have trouble thinking clearly, remembering things, or taking in new information. And because these changes are happening to you, you begin to wonder: What's wrong with me? Why can't I make this relationship work? Am I fundamentally broken? And that's exactly how narcissistic abuse works—it happens so subtly that you believe the insecurities you're experiencing are "you" instead of "what's happening" to you. This audiobook covers unique information related to narcissistic abuse.
-
-
This book is amazing.
- By Juan Servin on 01-03-24
-
Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
- How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents
- By: Lindsay C. Gibson PsyD
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 6 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay Gibson exposes the destructive nature of parents who are emotionally immature or unavailable. You will see how these parents create a sense of neglect and discover ways to heal from the pain and confusion caused by your childhood. By freeing yourself from your parents' emotional immaturity, you can recover your true nature, control how you react to them, and avoid disappointment. Finally, you'll learn how to create positive new relationships so you can build a better life.
-
-
Astonishing information.
- By K J Sunflower on 07-20-16
-
Out of the Fog
- Moving from Confusion to Clarity After Narcissistic Abuse
- By: Dana Morningstar
- Narrated by: Dana Morningstar
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The FOG is an acronym that stands for "Fear, Obligation, and Guilt". These three emotions are often how narcissists, sociopaths, and other types of emotional manipulators go about controlling others.
-
-
THE best book I’ve ever read on the subject
- By Alexandria Filipowski on 10-23-19
By: Dana Morningstar
-
Whole Again
- Healing Your Heart and Rediscovering Your True Self After Toxic Relationships and Emotional Abuse
- By: Jackson MacKenzie, Shannon Thomas - foreword
- Narrated by: Kaleo Griffith, Erin Spencer
- Length: 8 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Jackson MacKenzie has helped millions of people in their struggle to understand the experience of toxic relationships. His first book, Psychopath Free, explained how to identify and survive the immediate situation. In this highly anticipated new audiobook, he guides listeners on what to do next - how to fully heal from abuse in order to find love and acceptance for the self and others. MacKenzie shares insights and tools for working through the protective self we've developed so that we can finally move on to live a full and authentic life.
-
-
Good content, but to much repeat
- By Adri on 03-23-19
By: Jackson MacKenzie, and others
-
Empath and Narcissist
- A Practical Guide to Understand the Nature of Empathy and Narcissism, Protect Yourself from Energy Vampires and Sociopaths and Heal from Narcissistic Relationships
- By: Mia Warren
- Narrated by: Robyn Green
- Length: 3 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Do you feel like life is weighing you down all the time and you don’t know why? Do you feel like you’re constantly getting caught up in abusive relationships and you don’t know why? This audiobook is going to answer all of your questions. Being an empath isn’t a clear-cut road, it is a broad term with many meanings, and there are many different aspects to it. So, you might be an empath or you might display a high amount of empathy, either way, you probably share the same symptoms a true empath has, and this audiobook is designed to help you overcome life’s harshest critics and challenges.
-
-
Like Looking at Myself in the Mirror
- By ANGELES GRAHAM on 03-04-24
By: Mia Warren
-
The Nectar of Pain
- By: Najwa Zebian
- Narrated by: Najwa Zebian
- Length: 3 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In The Nectar of Pain, Zebian sheds light on the feelings and experiences that emerge from a painful heartbreak. She writes that the process of cleansing oneself of that pain—day by day, hour by hour, and second by second—is the real work of healing. With uncommon warmth and wisdom, Zebian empowers all who have lost to let go of anger and transform their suffering into the softness, sweetness, and beauty of nectar. She holds her listeners by the hand as they heal.
-
-
Everything
- By Shanoy on 12-06-23
By: Najwa Zebian
-
Narcissistic Abuse Recovery: The Complete Guide to Recover from Emotional Abuse, Identify Narcissists, and Overcome Abusive Relationships
- Break Free and Recover from Unhealthy Relationships
- By: Linda Hill
- Narrated by: S. L. Albert
- Length: 2 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Narcissistic abuse is hard to make sense of. One day, things are going great, the next, you’re left emotionally torn to pieces. The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery guide will help you set healthy boundaries and make sense of the complex. It will give you actionable steps you can take toward achieving healthier relationships. When you have no idea how to properly handle narcissistic abuse, it will linger, escalate, and go on far longer than it should. It’s time to clear the muddy waters. This guide offers a deep dive into the forces that drive narcissistic abuse.
-
-
lame. not much help. wasted credit
- By Anonymous User on 08-13-23
By: Linda Hill
-
Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths
- Stop the Cycle of Manipulation, Exploitation, and Abuse in Your Romantic Relationships
- By: Shahida Arabi MA
- Narrated by: Rachel Perry
- Length: 7 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Are you thriving in your relationship, or merely surviving? Are you the victim of constant manipulation, gaslighting, and deception at the hands of your partner? Do you find yourself constantly making excuses for your partner's abusive behavior? If you feel trapped in a relationship with someone who displays narcissistic or psychopathic behavior, you may be experiencing a trauma bond—a powerful connection you've developed with your abuser. It's important to remember that you're not alone and it's not your fault.
-
-
This book is GOLD!
- By Anonymous User on 01-04-25
By: Shahida Arabi MA
Critic reviews
“A must read. Dr. Ramani will teach you how to heal from any toxic relationship. With her expert advice based on decades of research and clinical experience, she makes the impossible seem possible.”–Mel Robbins, bestselling author of The High Five Habit and host of The Mel Robbins Podcast
“Dr. Ramani has written the book on narcissism for our times, not simply because it upends everything we thought we knew about this personality, but because it gives real people a sense of hope…that they can heal, that they can move forward from these relationships, that it’s not you.”–Maria Shriver
“In writing It's Not You, Dr. Durvasula directly addresses victims of narcissistic abuse with targeted advice developed through years of clinical experience and research. I would highly recommend this book to anyone struggling in a relationship with a narcissist. Once you realize it's not you who is the problem, you can become the solution.”–W. Keith Campbell, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Georgia and author of The Narcissism Epidemic
People who viewed this also viewed...
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go?
- Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist
- By: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Narrated by: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Length: 10 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Should I Stay or Should I Go? is a survival manual, a guidebook, and a shot of reality. Some people will never change, and kissing frogs is the stuff of fairy tales, not real life. The Beast never turns out to be a nice guy (or gal). This is a book that breaks down what mean people do to us, how they do it, and what we can do to survive.
-
-
Wake up call !
- By sashy on 08-18-16
-
You Are Why You Eat
- Change Your Food Attitude, Change Your Life
- By: Dr. Ramani Durvasula
- Narrated by: Jane Jacobs
- Length: 11 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
What if you could stop eating, stop working at a bad job, stop a bad relationship - stop anything when you have had enough? Understanding WHY you eat can lead to real and lasting change - both in weight loss and all other areas of life. In You Are Why You Eat food becomes a digestible metaphor. Most of us are unable to walk away - from a plate of food or a bad situation. But instead of staying and trying to please others all the time, what would happen if you listened to your inner voice?
-
-
Lose your husband, then lose weight
- By I Listen on 03-07-19
-
"Don't You Know Who I Am?": How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility
- By: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
- Narrated by: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
- Length: 19 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Health and wellness campaigns preach avoidance of unhealthy foods, sedentary lifestyles, tobacco, drugs, and alcohol, but rarely preach avoidance of unhealthy, difficult, or toxic people. Yet the health benefits of removing toxic people from your life may have far greater benefits to both physical and psychological health. We need to learn to be better gatekeepers for our minds, bodies, and souls. Narcissism, entitlement, and incivility have become the new world order, and we are all in trouble. They are not only normalized but also increasingly incentivized.
-
-
Excellent reality check
- By Lisa Rose on 10-11-19
-
What a Narcissist Does at the End of a Relationship
- Dealing with and Understanding the Aftermath of a Narcissistic Relationship
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 1 hr and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Breaking up in normal circumstances is hard enough. If you throw a narcissist into the equation, it makes it all the more difficult. If you're looking to listen to this audiobook, you're likely heartbroken and looking for some guidance, support, or understanding. As someone who has been through the hell of a narcissistic relationship, I can offer you all three, and I hope this audiobook can help you make sense of this heartbreaking time.
-
-
Horrible! Read if you want to become a narcissist!
- By DJ on 01-21-21
By: Lauren Kozlowski
-
The Covert Passive-Aggressive Narcissist
- Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse
- By: Debbie Mirza
- Narrated by: Debbie Mirza
- Length: 6 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse is the most comprehensive and helpful audiobook on the topic of covert narcissism. This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused.
-
-
This book CHANGED MY LIFE!
- By Mojo on 12-19-18
By: Debbie Mirza
-
Out of the Fog
- Moving from Confusion to Clarity After Narcissistic Abuse
- By: Dana Morningstar
- Narrated by: Dana Morningstar
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The FOG is an acronym that stands for "Fear, Obligation, and Guilt". These three emotions are often how narcissists, sociopaths, and other types of emotional manipulators go about controlling others.
-
-
THE best book I’ve ever read on the subject
- By Alexandria Filipowski on 10-23-19
By: Dana Morningstar
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go?
- Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist
- By: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Narrated by: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Length: 10 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Should I Stay or Should I Go? is a survival manual, a guidebook, and a shot of reality. Some people will never change, and kissing frogs is the stuff of fairy tales, not real life. The Beast never turns out to be a nice guy (or gal). This is a book that breaks down what mean people do to us, how they do it, and what we can do to survive.
-
-
Wake up call !
- By sashy on 08-18-16
-
You Are Why You Eat
- Change Your Food Attitude, Change Your Life
- By: Dr. Ramani Durvasula
- Narrated by: Jane Jacobs
- Length: 11 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
What if you could stop eating, stop working at a bad job, stop a bad relationship - stop anything when you have had enough? Understanding WHY you eat can lead to real and lasting change - both in weight loss and all other areas of life. In You Are Why You Eat food becomes a digestible metaphor. Most of us are unable to walk away - from a plate of food or a bad situation. But instead of staying and trying to please others all the time, what would happen if you listened to your inner voice?
-
-
Lose your husband, then lose weight
- By I Listen on 03-07-19
-
"Don't You Know Who I Am?": How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility
- By: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
- Narrated by: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
- Length: 19 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Health and wellness campaigns preach avoidance of unhealthy foods, sedentary lifestyles, tobacco, drugs, and alcohol, but rarely preach avoidance of unhealthy, difficult, or toxic people. Yet the health benefits of removing toxic people from your life may have far greater benefits to both physical and psychological health. We need to learn to be better gatekeepers for our minds, bodies, and souls. Narcissism, entitlement, and incivility have become the new world order, and we are all in trouble. They are not only normalized but also increasingly incentivized.
-
-
Excellent reality check
- By Lisa Rose on 10-11-19
-
What a Narcissist Does at the End of a Relationship
- Dealing with and Understanding the Aftermath of a Narcissistic Relationship
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 1 hr and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Breaking up in normal circumstances is hard enough. If you throw a narcissist into the equation, it makes it all the more difficult. If you're looking to listen to this audiobook, you're likely heartbroken and looking for some guidance, support, or understanding. As someone who has been through the hell of a narcissistic relationship, I can offer you all three, and I hope this audiobook can help you make sense of this heartbreaking time.
-
-
Horrible! Read if you want to become a narcissist!
- By DJ on 01-21-21
By: Lauren Kozlowski
-
The Covert Passive-Aggressive Narcissist
- Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse
- By: Debbie Mirza
- Narrated by: Debbie Mirza
- Length: 6 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse is the most comprehensive and helpful audiobook on the topic of covert narcissism. This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused.
-
-
This book CHANGED MY LIFE!
- By Mojo on 12-19-18
By: Debbie Mirza
-
Out of the Fog
- Moving from Confusion to Clarity After Narcissistic Abuse
- By: Dana Morningstar
- Narrated by: Dana Morningstar
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The FOG is an acronym that stands for "Fear, Obligation, and Guilt". These three emotions are often how narcissists, sociopaths, and other types of emotional manipulators go about controlling others.
-
-
THE best book I’ve ever read on the subject
- By Alexandria Filipowski on 10-23-19
By: Dana Morningstar
-
The Narcissist's Playbook
- How to Identify, Disarm, and Protect Yourself from Narcissists, Sociopaths, Psychopaths, and Other Types of Manipulative and Abusive People
- By: Dana Morningstar
- Narrated by: Dana Morningstar
- Length: 7 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Do you have a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath in your life, or think that you might? Do you continually feel anxious around someone in your life, but can’t pinpoint why?...Perhaps you know you are being manipulated or abused, but don’t know how to make it stop. The Narcissist’s Playbook can help. You can take back your life.
-
-
powerful
- By All Dolled Up on 01-17-20
By: Dana Morningstar
-
Becoming the Narcissist's Nightmare
- How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself
- By: Shahida Arabi
- Narrated by: Julie McKay
- Length: 19 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Although clinical research has been conducted on narcissism as a disorder, less is known about its effects on victims who are in toxic relationships with partners with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Individuals with this disorder engage in chronic devaluation and manipulation of their partners, a psychological and emotional phenomenon known as "narcissistic abuse". Unfortunately, the full extent of what narcissistic abuse entails is not taught in any psychology class or diagnostic manual.
-
-
Finally
- By zero on 12-08-16
By: Shahida Arabi
-
Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse, Gaslighting, Codependency and Complex PTSD (4 Books in 1)
- Workbook and Guide to Overcome Trauma, Toxic Relationships, ... and Recover from Unhealthy Relationships)
- By: Linda Hill
- Narrated by: S. L. Albert, Vicky David, Alene Sorensen
- Length: 12 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
This groundbreaking book includes four books that will teach you from start to finish, everything you need to know about Narcissistic Abuse, Gaslighting, Codependency and Complex PTSD, as well as how to recover from each one of them.
-
-
Better understanding and clarity
- By Amber Glover on 02-15-23
By: Linda Hill
-
If Only I'd Known!
- How to Outsmart Narcissists, Set Guilt-Free Boundaries, and Create Unshakeable Self-Worth
- By: Chelsey Brooke Cole
- Narrated by: Chelsey Brooke Cole
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Narcissistic abuse creates a tidal wave of confusion, hypervigilance, and overthinking. You have trouble thinking clearly, remembering things, or taking in new information. And because these changes are happening to you, you begin to wonder: What's wrong with me? Why can't I make this relationship work? Am I fundamentally broken? And that's exactly how narcissistic abuse works—it happens so subtly that you believe the insecurities you're experiencing are "you" instead of "what's happening" to you. This audiobook covers unique information related to narcissistic abuse.
-
-
This book is amazing.
- By Juan Servin on 01-03-24
-
Trauma Bonding: Understanding and Overcoming the Trauma Bond in a Narcissistic Relationship
- Narcissistic Relationship Recovery, Book 1
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 1 hr and 37 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
If you're constantly feeling on edge, forever working to appease your spouse to little avail and feel like you're constantly being chipped away at with their abusive behavior, then I can understand how emotionally shattering it feels to live this way. If, in the same breath, it breaks your heart to even consider leaving them because you can't imagine life without them, then I can understand that feeling too - because I was trauma bonded to my abusive ex.
-
-
Not relevant for everyone dealing with trauma bonding
- By Alesia Braund on 11-18-20
By: Lauren Kozlowski
-
30 Covert Emotional Manipulation Tactics: How Manipulators Take Control in Personal Relationships
- By: Adelyn Birch
- Narrated by: Kitty Hendrix
- Length: 1 hr and 48 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Identifying covert emotional manipulation is tricky. You sense something is wrong, but you can't quite put your finger on the problem. This powerful book will reveal to you if manipulation is at play in your relationships. It will open your eyes. You will learn 30 tactics manipulators use to get what they want. You will also learn to spot the warning signs within yourself that expose covert manipulation is taking place, even if you can't identify the specific tactics being used.
-
-
This book can change your life!
- By Cat O. on 04-04-18
By: Adelyn Birch
-
Start Here: A Crash Course in Understanding, Navigating, and Healing From Narcissistic Abuse
- By: Dana Morningstar
- Narrated by: Dana Morningstar
- Length: 8 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Confusing. Crazy making. Draining. Does this describe your relationship? Do you wonder if they will ever change? Do you want to know why they lie so much...even when the truth would work better? Have you wondered why they never seem to change - no matter how much you are willing to do for them, or how much love, understanding, rehab, religion, therapy, second (or 22nd) chances you’ve given them? If so, you are not alone and this book is a great place to start.
-
-
The best
- By Icebound on 02-13-19
By: Dana Morningstar
-
Covert Narcissism
- Signs of a Covert Narcissist, Ways to Protect Yourself from Their Manipulation and How to Deal with Their Narcissism
- By: Louisa Cox
- Narrated by: Heidi Baker
- Length: 1 hr and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Covert narcissism is a hidden and concealed form of narcissism, making it all the more difficult for the abuser to be confronted or "outed" for their behavior. Covert narcissism is a passive-aggressive, hostile, and toxic form of abuse that makes victims feel hopeless, unheard, hurt, and confused by the abusers' behavior.
-
-
Good
- By John Galt on 08-10-19
By: Louisa Cox
-
The Narcissist You Know
- Defending Yourself Against Extreme Narcissists in an All-About-Me Age
- By: Joseph Burgo PhD
- Narrated by: Christopher Lane
- Length: 7 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In today's social media and selfie-obsessed culture, we are living in an age of narcissism - and a society that often celebrates this potentially harmful trait rather than understanding it as a psychological disorder. Scientists are beginning to learn that narcissism exists on a spectrum - much like autism - and most of us exhibit some mild narcissistic tendencies.
-
-
everyone needs to read this book
- By Gabriela Silveria on 02-06-16
By: Joseph Burgo PhD
-
What You Need to Know about Narcissistic Abuse: 2-in-1 Book Bundle Featuring Start Here and Out of the Fog
- Understanding Narcissists, Sociopaths, or Other Types of Toxic People in Your Life
- By: Dana Morningstar
- Narrated by: Dana Morningstar
- Length: 17 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In this box set, you get the best-selling book Out of the Fog, and you get Start Here included as a bonus. The audiobook Out of the Fog will help you get out of the of confusion and into the clarity that you are looking for... Start Here will help you understand all of the concepts, terminology, and FAQs surrounding narcissistic abuse.
-
-
A Must Read For Survivors Of Narcissism!
- By Amazon Customer on 02-12-20
By: Dana Morningstar
-
When Love Is a Lie
- Narcissistic Partners & the Pathological Relationship Agenda
- By: Zari L Ballard
- Narrated by: Lisa Bunting
- Length: 4 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When our partner is a narcissist, only those who've actually experienced the madness will ever understand what we're going through. When Love Is a Lie is a straight-up, tell-all book about narcissism in relationships that skips the clinical bullshit to focus solely on the personal experience. A narrative that holds nothing back, Zari Ballard's story will educate, enlighten, and empower you to evaluate (and fully understand) the mind-boggling dysfunction in your own relationship.
-
-
Greatfull to have found this!
- By Joy on 03-13-17
By: Zari L Ballard
-
Disarming the Narcissist (Third Edition)
- Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed
- By: Wendy T. Behary LCSW, Jeffrey Young PhD - foreword, Daniel J. Siegel MD - preface
- Narrated by: Joana Garcia
- Length: 8 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Now a self-help classic, Disarming the Narcissist is a practical, step-by-step communication guide to help you cope with and confront the narcissist in your life. Based on fan feedback, this fully revised and updated third edition features new information on shame, hypersexuality, and infidelity in narcissism; legal information to help you if you are divorcing a narcissist; and the impact of narcissism on children.
-
-
Makes me dislike Narcissists even more!
- By Kirsty Gastrow on 06-23-22
By: Wendy T. Behary LCSW, and others
What listeners say about It's Not You
Highly rated for:
Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Krystal Leann
- 02-25-24
Radical acceptance! Compassionate approach!
Should be a must read for all trauma mental health industries. Beautiful and compassionate approach to survivors (not victims) of abuse. Helpful, hopeful, and vulnerable.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
5 people found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- elizabeth lawrence
- 02-29-24
Powerful Support for victims of Toxic Abuse
Thoughtfully written, succinct yet detailed. If you have toxic people in your life, this is a must read. You will find insightful explanations and helpful strategies to cope and protect yourself from harm.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
4 people found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Mom of two
- 03-04-24
Best book in narcissism and narcissistic abuse
Dr. Ramini's work, including this book, courageously pushes narcissism and narcissistic abuse into modern psychology and mental health care. Finally, someone identifies, accurately describes, and walks through the experiences of those who have been struggling their entire lives because of these significantly harmful relationship dynamics. My hope is that her work and advocacy of these issues results in better education and practice for counselors, therapists, the legal system, employers, etc., so that those who are affected finally can heal and avoid finding themselves in the dynamics again. Great work, Dr. Ramini! You are making a difference in so many people's lives.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
2 people found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- 6699 Unlimited
- 05-22-24
author is great
This is a wonderful addition to authors already wonderfully established domain on this topic! I have consumed this education and verify that the content is valid by my comparable life experiences.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Missagape
- 05-20-24
Soothing and refreshing
I’ve felt so misunderstood in my 12 year marriage. I’ve prayed fasted and did all the things but things only got worse. This time when I prayed I felt the Lord was telling me to get this book. I initially thought this couldn’t be God, wouldn’t He tell me to read my Bible more or pray? But wow after listening to it I know this is what I needed and I know God is not joining in with the voices of all my gaslighters. I now feel loved, seen and even more confident about leaving my abusive so called Christian marriage. And the way it’s read by Dr. Ramani herself makes it feel like a soothing therapy session.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Anonymous User
- 03-11-24
Cant say enough on how good this book is.
Very recommended for people who face antagonistic relationships and narcissistic people. 100% relevant from beginning to the end.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Curtis/Sarah
- 03-16-24
Well written and easy to digest.
Excellent resource for those struggling with Narcissistic people in their life. This book gives straightforward and practical tools to manage the Narc and heal yourself.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Anonymous User
- 03-21-24
Read this book!
This book is amazing and should be read by anyone suspecting narcissistic abuse in their life. It brought up a lot of things I didn’t even realize were part of narcissistic abuse.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Lynnie
- 04-02-24
exact truth
I thought that I'd heard it all. but no, I learned something new about myself. not my"'person"
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- HFR
- 04-09-24
Brilliant, life changing!
It provides the answer I have been seeking all my life. Packed with informations that makes a lot of sense. I listen to it over and over....
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!