Recovering from the Affair
Your Guide to Saving Your Marriage After Emotional or Physical Infidelity
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Narrated by:
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Lee H. Baucom PhD
About this listen
Infidelity does not have to be the end of your marriage. Your marriage can recover and thrive after an affair. But only when you get to the roots of the problem, solve the issues, rebuild trust, and learn to move forward.
Unfortunately, many marriages end needlessly after infidelity. Often, this is a result of not knowing there is another option. This is complicated by not having access to tools and understanding that can heal a marriage. In fact, those tools can help a marriage move toward greater health than was there before the affair.
Dr. Lee Baucom provides a roadmap for dealing with physical or emotional infidelity. His book can provide guidance on how to confront an affair, how to understand the reasons behind the affair, and how to move forward through a healing process. His approach gives resources to both the person who had the affair and the spouse.
Additionally, Dr. Baucom provides a special Question and Answer bonus to listeners that covers common questions from other readers.
Your marriage can survive an affair. In fact, it can be stronger than before the infidelity. You just need the tools and guidance to get there. Find those tools in this book.
©2017 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. (P)2023 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.Listeners also enjoyed...
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The average divorce takes two years with a median cost of $30,000. Yet the true cost of divorce is more than time or money; it is the legacy of the decisions made during the process. No matter how long two people have been married, whether there are children or not, divorce often leads to bad choices that can forever alter a family's life. But what if you could reverse the stereotype and move regret-free through this process?
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Thanks for the great advice!
- By Tom Clemente on 11-09-16
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How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
- By: Patricia Love, Steven Stosny
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Men are right. The "relationship talk" does not help. Dr. Patricia Love’s and Dr. Steven Stosny’s How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness: Love is not about better communication. It's about connection.
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Must read if your on the verge of loosing it all!
- By Chris on 07-19-15
By: Patricia Love, and others
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The Good Fight
- Wanting to Leave, Choosing to Stay, and the Powerful Practice for Loving Faithfully
- By: Jana Kramer, Michael Caussin
- Narrated by: Jana Kramer, Michael Caussin
- Length: 5 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Hosts of the award-winning Whine Down podcast, Jana Kramer and Michael Caussin explore the raw and real moments of their marriage - what it means to love, to fight, and to sincerely forgive - with spiritual guidance and practical advice for anyone seeking stronger, more fulfilling love.
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Could’ve been a short article and not a book
- By J Klay on 11-01-20
By: Jana Kramer, and others
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The DNA of Relationships
- By: Dr. Gary Smalley
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 6 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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We are designed for relationships, yet they often bring us pain. In this paradigm-shifting book, Gary Smalley unravels the DNA of relationships: we are made for three great relationships, with God, others, and ourselves, and all relationships involve choice. Gary exposes a destructive relationship dance that characterizes nearly every relationship conflict, and he offers five new dance steps that will revolutionize relationships.
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Could be half as long
- By Christine on 01-06-08
By: Dr. Gary Smalley
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12 Smart Things to Do When the Booze and Drugs Are Gone
- Choosing Emotional Sobriety Through Self-Awareness and Right Action
- By: Allen Berger PhD
- Narrated by: Matthew Boston
- Length: 5 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Allen Berger, PhD, draws on the teachings of Bill W. and psychotherapy pioneers to offer 12 hallmarks of emotional sobriety that, when practiced, give people the confidence to be accountable for their behavior, ask for what they want and need, and grow and develop a deeper trust in the process of life. These smart things include: understanding who you are and what's important to you; learning not to take others' reactions personally; trusting your inner compass; and taking responsibility for your reactions to problematic situations.
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Rich exploration and application of ES principles
- By rdkemper on 08-12-23
By: Allen Berger PhD
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The No Contact Rule
- By: Natalie Lue
- Narrated by: Lucy Price-Lewis
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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You're trying to get over your ex, yet you're still in touch and have ended up being his or her backup plan. Maybe you haven't left yet, but you want to and just don't know how. Maybe you're tired of doing the lather, rinse, repeat of getting back together and winding up back at square one. It's time to cut contact. The No Contact Rule is an inspiring guide to extinguishing the temptation to stay in touch or to keep engaging, helping you to reclaim your sense of self and move on to a healthier relationship.
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I can not recomment this book highly enough!
- By Amazon Customer on 02-14-17
By: Natalie Lue
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Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That?
- Encouragement for Women Involved with Angry and Controlling Men
- By: Lundy Bancroft
- Narrated by: Gary Galone
- Length: 11 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Like a constant friend, this collection of meditations is a source of strength and reassurance designed to speak to women like you, women in relationships with angry and controlling men. It helps you to digest what is happening a piece at a time, so you can gain clarity, safety, and freedom.
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Just what I needed.
- By lori Goodson on 11-07-15
By: Lundy Bancroft
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Frientimacy
- How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- By: Shasta Nelson
- Narrated by: Robin Eller
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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In Frientimacy, award-winning speaker Shasta Nelson shows how anyone can form stronger, more meaningful friendships, marked by a level of trust she calls "frientimacy". Shasta explores the most common complaints and conflicts facing female friendships today, and lays out strategies for overcoming these pitfalls to create deeper, supportive relationships that last for the long-term.
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I didn't finish it, but I still recommend it
- By Emily on 10-21-17
By: Shasta Nelson
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9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage
- And the Truths That Will Save It and Set It Free
- By: Greg Smalley, Robert S. Paul
- Narrated by: Lyle Blaker
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Lies about marriage are rampant in our culture and the church. They’re killing marriages. But the corresponding truths can strengthen marriages and even save the most troubled relationships. In this audiobook, marriage experts Greg Smalley and Robert Paul identify the lies, explain how they work to destroy marriages, and reveal the truths that not only can improve marriages, but rescue those that are floundering.
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Not new, contradictory and biblically inaccurate
- By thor on 04-07-21
By: Greg Smalley, and others
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The Emotional Edge
- Discover Your Inner Age, Ignite Your Hidden Strengths, and Reroute Misdirected Fear to Live Your Fullest
- By: Crystal Andrus Morissette
- Narrated by: Andi Arndt
- Length: 9 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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The Emotional Edge is an exciting expansion of Crystal's successful brand - she has tackled weight management, confidence building, and spiritual growth; now she combines all that and more into her most powerful program yet. The Emotional Edge is a guide for letting go of the past and embracing a more empowered future. This audiobook is spiritual self-help designed to teach listeners how to overcome behavioral ruts and engage the world from a happier, more empowered place.
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the world needs more of this.
- By Amber Jessop on 11-25-17
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Love Lost, Love Found
- A Woman's Guide to Letting Go of the Past and Finding New Love
- By: Tatiana Jerome
- Narrated by: Margaret Jewell West
- Length: 4 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
Blindsided by a breakup, and asking herself the usual why, how, what questions, Tatiana Jerome went online. She used social media as a way to uplift and empower herself by venting but also working through her own part in the relationship's demise. Her posts struck a chord with thousands and then hundreds of thousands of readers - no surprise since most relationships (approximately 85 percent) end.
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Nice
- By Ms. Keisha on 11-13-17
By: Tatiana Jerome
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Trust Again
- By: Debi Silber PhD
- Narrated by: Debi Silber PhD
- Length: 7 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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During times of betrayal, when we most need support, sometimes the ones we would turn to first are the betrayers. Other times, we’re saddled with shame and fear. But it’s during these times that we need to learn to trust again. This book offers support, comfort, and community to those struggling with feelings associated with betrayal and guides them to healing from painful experiences of it. Listeners will learn about and move through five stages from betrayal to breakthrough and will be lovingly guided with tools and strategies along the way.
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Life changing
- By KM on 07-27-22
By: Debi Silber PhD
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The Courage to Stay
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Rebuild the lost trust in your relationship, heal from the trauma of infidelity, and create a stronger, more resilient marriage with a proven program based on 22 years of clinical experience. Nothing hurts more than discovering your partner has been unfaithful. But an affair doesn’t mean your partner doesn’t love you or that your relationship is over. Many couples have recovered from infidelity and saved their marriages. You can too.
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realness
- By Amazon Customer on 04-18-24
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How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair
- A Compact Manual for the Unfaithful
- By: Linda J. MacDonald
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Once an affair comes to light, many unfaithful persons "wake up" and want to save their marriages. Yet they usually make terrible mistakes in their bungled attempts to win back their partners' trust. Linda J. MacDonald, an infidelity specialist for 23 years, has identified behaviors and attitudes that determine unfaithful persons' success or failure to mend their marriages after the wrecking ball of an affair. How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair offers practical advice for those who've strayed and want a second chance.
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Very Helpful
- By Peppertaz on 03-04-17
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After the Affair, Third Edition
- Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful
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From a clinical psychologist who served as a clinical supervisor in the Department of Psychology at Yale University, received the CPA’s award for Distinguished Contribution to the Practice of Psychology, and has treated couples and trained therapists for over four decades, this newly updated, award-winning book provides concrete, proven strategies for those who seek to survive their partner’s infidelity and to rebuild the relationship after an affair. This new third edition of After the Affair helps guide both hurt and unfaithful partners through three stages of healing.
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Victim blaming!! Stay away
- By OO on 08-24-23
By: Janis A. Spring
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Infidelity
- The Best Worst Thing that Could Happen to Your Marriage: The Complete Guide on How to Heal from Affairs
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Infidelity: The Best Worst Thing That Could Happen to Your Marriage was written to help couples navigate their way to healing after experiencing the devastating impact of physical and emotional affairs. Listening to this book will allow you the opportunity to process the affair, assess the damage, and make an informed choice about the future of your relationship.
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night time bed story
- By BrownGuy78 on 09-20-22
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Questions to Ask a Cheater
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Talking to your partner after they’ve cheated is undeniably one of the toughest conversations you’ll ever have with them. You’ll be bubbling over with a ton of emotions - anger, upset, and frustration. The cheating partner will also have their own emotions to deal with - dread, uncertainty, and the shame of their actions.
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Thank you
- By Sam on 04-19-23
By: Rebekah Clarke
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After a Good Man Cheats
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This audiobook is a practical action plan that will walk you through the first stages after your wife has discovered your infidelity. Learn the tools to fix your marriage. Avoid the (sometimes fatal) mistakes I've seen so many men make.
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Horrible, but with some helpful information
- By A reader on 10-15-21
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The Courage to Stay
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Rebuild the lost trust in your relationship, heal from the trauma of infidelity, and create a stronger, more resilient marriage with a proven program based on 22 years of clinical experience. Nothing hurts more than discovering your partner has been unfaithful. But an affair doesn’t mean your partner doesn’t love you or that your relationship is over. Many couples have recovered from infidelity and saved their marriages. You can too.
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realness
- By Amazon Customer on 04-18-24
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How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair
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Once an affair comes to light, many unfaithful persons "wake up" and want to save their marriages. Yet they usually make terrible mistakes in their bungled attempts to win back their partners' trust. Linda J. MacDonald, an infidelity specialist for 23 years, has identified behaviors and attitudes that determine unfaithful persons' success or failure to mend their marriages after the wrecking ball of an affair. How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair offers practical advice for those who've strayed and want a second chance.
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Very Helpful
- By Peppertaz on 03-04-17
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After the Affair, Third Edition
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- By: Janis A. Spring
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From a clinical psychologist who served as a clinical supervisor in the Department of Psychology at Yale University, received the CPA’s award for Distinguished Contribution to the Practice of Psychology, and has treated couples and trained therapists for over four decades, this newly updated, award-winning book provides concrete, proven strategies for those who seek to survive their partner’s infidelity and to rebuild the relationship after an affair. This new third edition of After the Affair helps guide both hurt and unfaithful partners through three stages of healing.
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Victim blaming!! Stay away
- By OO on 08-24-23
By: Janis A. Spring
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Infidelity
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Infidelity: The Best Worst Thing That Could Happen to Your Marriage was written to help couples navigate their way to healing after experiencing the devastating impact of physical and emotional affairs. Listening to this book will allow you the opportunity to process the affair, assess the damage, and make an informed choice about the future of your relationship.
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night time bed story
- By BrownGuy78 on 09-20-22
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Questions to Ask a Cheater
- Questions to Ask a Cheating Spouse to Gain Closure and Heal Your Heart
- By: Rebekah Clarke
- Narrated by: Clare Radix
- Length: 1 hr and 15 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Talking to your partner after they’ve cheated is undeniably one of the toughest conversations you’ll ever have with them. You’ll be bubbling over with a ton of emotions - anger, upset, and frustration. The cheating partner will also have their own emotions to deal with - dread, uncertainty, and the shame of their actions.
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Thank you
- By Sam on 04-19-23
By: Rebekah Clarke
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After a Good Man Cheats
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This audiobook is a practical action plan that will walk you through the first stages after your wife has discovered your infidelity. Learn the tools to fix your marriage. Avoid the (sometimes fatal) mistakes I've seen so many men make.
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Horrible, but with some helpful information
- By A reader on 10-15-21
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Cheating in a Nutshell
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After being cheated on, individuals may feel battered by emotion, with nowhere to turn, and no roadmap in sight. International relationship advice authors Wayne and Tamara Mitchell provide that roadmap through Cheating in a Nutshell: What Infidelity Does to the Victim.
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Very anti-forgiveness
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By: Wayne Mitchell, and others
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After the Affair
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Many times infidelity is the death of a relationship - but an affair doesn't have to mean the end. Realistic ways of coping with pain, restoring self-esteem, and rebuilding trust and intimacy are available for the first time on audio in this guide by Dr. Janis Abrahms Spring. Dr. Spring is one of the few clinical psychologists in the US who specializes in infidelity. She offers original and proven strategies to those seeking guidance, sympathy, and solutions, laying to rest blame and recrimination and focusing instead on recovery.
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OW vs. Lover
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Healing Your Spouse After Your Affair
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Imagine the pain and devastation of discovering your partner has had an affair. The betrayal, the hurt, and the feeling of being torn apart from the person you once loved. You may feel like your world has been turned upside down, leaving you wondering if your relationship can ever be healed. But what if there was a way to mend the wounds and rebuild trust? This groundbreaking book reveals the secrets to healing your spouse after an affair, from understanding their perspective to providing the necessary support.
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Disappointed
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Not 'Just Friends'
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Good people in good marriages are having affairs. The workplace and the Internet have become fertile breeding grounds for “friendships” that can slowly and insidiously turn into love affairs. Yet you can protect your relationship from emotional or sexual betrayal by recognizing the red flags that mark the stages of slipping into an improper, dangerous intimacy that can threaten your marriage.
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WORST to Read/Listen to if you are well past D Day
- By K on 02-04-17
By: Shirley P. Glass Ph.D., and others
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The Betrayal Bind
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What happens when your partner, your primary person, in an instant, becomes a source of danger and pain? The Betrayal Bind introduces new language, concepts, and imagery to explore the crucial relational dilemma that betrayed partners face when their significant other is unsafe to connect to, yet connection is the key to healing.
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Sex With a Cheating Person?! NO!
- By Primetime on 12-19-23
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How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair
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- By: Janet Bloom
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- Length: 3 hrs and 49 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Ninety-eight percent of men admit to having fantasies about someone other than their partner. Eighty percent of women do too! So where is the line? Infidelity is a far more complex psychological matter than just someone straying because they aren’t happy in their relationship. Regardless of your gender, sexual orientation, level of commitment, or type of affair, you will need help if you want to help your partner and yourself. It’s not going to be easy, nor should it be. But for anyone who is genuinely sorry and prepared to make the effort, nothing is impossible!
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Interesting listen
- By Sean on 06-17-24
By: Janet Bloom
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Living and Loving After Betrayal
- How to Heal from Emotional Abuse, Deceit, Infidelity, and Chronic Resentment
- By: Steven Stosny
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Betrayal has many faces, including anger, abuse, deceit, and infidelity. These feel like betrayal because they violate the implicit promise of emotional bonds, that your loved one will care about your well-being and never intentionally hurt you. If you've recently left a relationship where you felt betrayed by your partner, you may have difficulty moving on. In fact, it can seem impossible to view the world without the shadow of past betrayal hovering over you. As a result, you may struggle to create meaning in your life and to build new, loving relationships.
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Best of the best with honors.. sir!
- By Joe Davis on 09-02-16
By: Steven Stosny
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Infidelity Recovery and Forgiveness EFT Affirmations Journaling Workbook
- Rebuilding Trust in a Relationship and Healing Your Marriage After the Affair
- By: Robyn Chapman
- Narrated by: Tanya Nakogee
- Length: 3 hrs and 40 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The pain of betrayal from a once-trusted partner is severe enough to be classed as a type of PTSD, with similar symptoms of hypervigilance, flashbacks, nightmares, avoidance of people and places, depression and anxiety.
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Helps you move past the pain of infidelity
- By JENNY VILLANUEVA on 12-20-22
By: Robyn Chapman
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Transcending Post-Infidelity Stress Disorder
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Overall
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Performance
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The phrase "broken heart" belies the real trauma behind the all-too-common occurrence of infidelity. Psychologist Dennis Ortman likens the psychological aftermath of sexual betrayal to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in its origin and symptoms, including anxiety, irritability, rage, emotional numbing, and flashbacks. Dr. Ortman sees recovery as a spiritual journey and draws on the wisdom of diverse faiths, from Christianity to Buddhism. He also offers exercises to deepen recovery, such as guided meditations and journaling.
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Religious Slant Takes Away from Seriousness
- By Mr. Xtabay on 07-16-20
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The State of Affairs
- Rethinking Infidelity
- By: Esther Perel
- Narrated by: Esther Perel
- Length: 11 hrs and 57 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
An affair: It can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. Adultery has existed since marriage was invented, and so, too, the prohibition against it - in fact it has a tenacity that marriage can only envy. Iconic couples' therapist and best-selling author of Mating in Captivity Esther Perel returns with a groundbreaking and provocative look at infidelity, arguing for a more nuanced and less judgmental conversation about our transgressions.
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A compassionate approach
- By Anonymous User on 10-16-17
By: Esther Perel
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Infidelity Recovery
- A Comprehensive Workbook for Healing, Rebuilding Trust, and Restoring Intimacy in Your Relationship (Interpersonal Skills)
- By: Emma Lancaster
- Narrated by: Ivan Busenius
- Length: 3 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Redeem your relationship from infidelity’s clutches and launch it to greater heights than you’ve ever experienced or imagined. Has infidelity rocked your relationship? Are you desperately worried that it’s the beginning of the end for you and your partner? If you had a surefire path to reclaiming your lost love, would you take it? Whether you have been unfaithful to your partner or you’ve discovered betrayal by your lover, infidelity is a painful, tough, confusing situation to navigate in a relationship.
By: Emma Lancaster
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I Love You but I Don’t Trust You
- The Complete Guide to Restoring Trust in Your Relationship
- By: Mira Kirshenbaum
- Narrated by: Emily Durante
- Length: 7 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Is my relationship worth saving? Will the trust ever come back? How can things be good between us again? Whether broken trust is due to daily dishonesties, a monumental betrayal, or even a history of hurts from the past, it can put a relationship at risk. This is the first book to show you exactly what to do to restore trust in your relationship, regardless of how it was damaged.
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for betrayed women - not men!
- By annonymous on 07-22-18
By: Mira Kirshenbaum
What listeners say about Recovering from the Affair
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Performance
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- Amazon Customer
- 04-10-24
The outline and tips
This book was very fulfilling and helpful in the recovery process. Very inciteful. We are encouraged to continue to fight for our marriage.
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- Victoria
- 06-05-23
I enjoyed listing to this book.
I enjoyed this book, short sweet, simple and straight to the point. I recommend taking notes and if your spouse is willing to listen to it together even better.
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- Anonymous User
- 03-18-24
how to recover
very insightful piece to listen to
well rounded help
deeper dive into restoring relationships
well worth a listen
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Performance
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- Rob & Jules
- 03-30-24
covering both sides of the affair
I chose the audible version of this book. It was an excellent experience. It was hard at times but comforting to hear both sides of the affair. I will give this to my spouse to listen to as well.
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- Amazon Customer
- 07-30-24
Clear steps to take to save the marriage
This book was the first step to healing after the affair. The guidance to understanding and the steps to take laid out helped me immensely. I could thank the author of this book enough. I whole heartedly recommend this book to anyone who has experienced infidelity, for both parties.
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- Brian M
- 07-07-23
Please read if you’re in a struggling relationship
I think there is a lot of good advice in this book and hits the mark on what to do to survive an affair. I’m still in the early stages of dealing with the aftermath, but I am optimistic. I really wish I read this before the affair occurred because it is spot on for why it happened and maybe it could have been avoided if we only understood what was going on. Connection, boundaries, and opportunity are the drivers and at any point focusing on them would have prevented a lot of heartache. If you’re looking at these books there is still a chance to save your relationship so take a chance.
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- Sean McClasky
- 10-08-24
Really Helped! Read it!
Just read it. It will help. Do it, do it now. You need help in this crazy time. This is a great start.
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- Jimmy D. Recio
- 05-25-23
Great book straight to the point
Good book to the point! Much good insight and advice for struggling couples. I’m going to listen to it again!
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- K. Anderson
- 02-23-24
Understanding an Affair
Everything about this book was wonderful. I lost my husband, but he betrayed me, and I only found out two weeks before he died that he was in a 15 year affair, which was a little bit less than half of our married life I thought I was going to die when I found out as he was on his deathbed so I didn’t find out a lot until afterwards. The pain is unbearable. This book helped me understand so much about what my husband was going through and about our relationship and things we could’ve done better. I wanted to read this book so I could separate the affair from his death from the betrayal, so I could mourn him properly without the betrayal getting in the way. I just read it today, but I already feel so much better. I understand so much more. also, if I ever do have another relationship reading the entire book, helped me know what to do if that should ever happen. I recommend this book to anyone that has gone through betrayal, Dr.Baucom is very direct and connected to each and every word he said Thank you so much Dr Baucom.
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- Nazreen Silva
- 04-06-24
The practicality
Easy to listen to with practical advise not just for marriages with infidelity problems but can be applied to other marital problems too
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